Funny how their perceptions of that summer were so different. For eleven-year-old Adam, it had been a grand adventure—and one last chance to get closer to his Dad before all hell broke loose. With money scarce and liquor stores not within easy reach, his father had actually been pretty decent to him and his mother. Then he’d gotten another job and they’d moved back to Minneapolis. Beginning of the end.
Patrick came to stand next to him, having lost his defensive stance. “I’ve been working on the place as I can and hiring help as needed for the past year. There’s electricity, hot and cold running water, indoor facilities, and the whole nine yards now.”
Adam smiled. “I’d like to see it sometime. Let me know if there’s anything I can do to help.”
He still couldn’t believe he had a younger brother and a younger sister. Looking at Megan, standing next to their mom with a protective hand on her shoulder, he didn’t know how he could be much more blessed.
Well, there was still one thing missing from his life.
Adam said his good-byes, promising to stop by again before he headed out of town. He made his way back down to the parking garage and his car. The drive back to Karla’s parents’ house had him so deep in thought, he nearly missed her street. He had so much to tell her, he didn’t know where to start.
Maybe he’d just needed to start with “I’m sorry.”
When he let himself back into the darkened house using the key the Paxtons had told him was in the flower pot on the porch, he tiptoed upstairs. Dark and silent. He’d have to wait until the morning to talk with Karla. He got undressed and put on his USMC sweatshirt and sweatpants, and stretched out on the rack. But sleep wouldn’t come. The events of the evening played over and over in his head. He needed to talk with Karla, but she needed her sleep.
Seeing how she’d looked when he’d arrived Wednesday and her being so sick yesterday morning renewed his worry about her health. Fuck. Why hadn’t it occurred to him sooner? A sense of dread came over him that sent his heart racing and his gut into a tailspin. While he was on leave recovering from the shrapnel wounds in Afghanistan, Joni had exhibited many of the same symptoms—loss of appetite, weight loss. He didn’t remember her vomiting, but he was out of it most of the time on pain killers. Obviously, she wouldn’t tell him if she had been sick. But at some point he’d noticed and asked her. She’d told him she’d just been worried about him. Months later he learned her cancer had metastasized to the liver.
Sweat broke out on his forehead, cooling rapidly in the room’s chilly air. He needed to get Karla to a doctor. Why hadn’t he thought to do that sooner? What if Karla had something serious, too? Oh, God. He’d only just come to realize how important she was to him. Surely to God, the universe wouldn’t fuck the two of them up the way it had him and Joni. No way. But Karla was young and, until recently, seemed healthy. It had to be something simple like the flu.
It just had to be.
But his heart continued to beat rapidly as images of Karla going through what Joni had endured putting him on edge for the next few hours. Finally, unable to stay away from her any longer, he tossed the sheet back and crossed the room into the bathroom. The door to her bedroom was ajar and he opened it further, thankful the hinges were oiled, and slipped into her room.
Moonlight came in through the window and his eyes, already adjusted to the dark, made out her facial features. Calm, peaceful, sleeping. He expelled the breath he’d been holding and his body relaxed. She was okay; for now, at least. He glanced around and saw a chair in the corner and decided he’d take up watch over her tonight. No sense going back to his rack, because he wasn’t going to get any sleep this night. He needed to be near her.
God, how he’d missed her.
Adam missed when she challenged him. He missed when she surrendered to him sexually. He missed when she loved him in so many ways. Most of all, he missed that he hadn’t loved her back.
Well, fuck that shit. He did love her.
No need to hide it or run from it. He loved Karla. He’d loved Joni, too, even if he hadn’t been able to tell her. But he wouldn’t leave Karla wondering. He’d tell her, just as soon as she woke up, and every day together for the rest of their lives. Again and again—and often.
He just hoped she was okay and they would have many, many years to wake up beside each other.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Karla’s stomach churned with the now familiar queasiness she’d woken up to for the last week. She dreaded sitting up, because she knew she’d have to make that mad morning dash to the toilet and she just wanted to stay burrowed under the blankets. But the sound of someone breathing brought her eyes open and she found herself staring across the room into Adam’s intense gaze.
“We need to talk, kitten.”
Ka-thunk.
Oh, she so didn’t need that submissive stomach-drop reaction right now. Tossing back the covers, she held one hand over her mouth as she gathered her hair in the other and ran for the bathroom. She’d barely lifted the seat before she felt his strong arm around her waist, holding her, and his hand grabbing her hair, fisting it to keep it from getting in the way.
“I’ve got you, kitten.”
The contents of her stomach emptied to her great embarrassment, but she didn’t care. She always felt better afterward, for a little while, at least. She just wanted some relief, even if she knew she’d have to face Adam in a few moments.
When it seemed the worst of it was over, she patted the hand he held over her abdomen to signal she didn’t need him anymore, but he didn’t let go. He helped her stand up straight and, when she started to move toward the sink, didn’t relinquish his hold.
“Sit.”
He lowered the toilet lid and started to guide her there, but she resisted. “I’m better now. Thanks.”
“I. Said. Sit.”
She looked up at him. “Please don’t make my stomach go ka-thunk again.”
“What?”
“Never mind.” He cast a look at her that told her she’d better explain herself.
Ka-thunk.
“It’s just that, when you go all Dom like that—or in Master mode, for that matter—with a look or a command, my stomach does this weird thing. It just sort of drops into my pelvis.” When he quirked an eyebrow, she continued. “Okay, metaphorically drops, not literally. But I wish you’d stop doing it because my stomach’s already off kilter.”
He chuckled and went to the sink to wet a washcloth.
“What’s so funny?”
Adam didn’t answer right away, but returned to stand in front of her. “Tilt your head back.”
Ka-thunk. Damn him.
Like a puppet, she did as he instructed. He gently washed the sweat, tears, and grime off her face and mouth and rinsed the washcloth again, handing it to her. She held it over her eyes, hoping to avoid broken blood vessels and swelling.
“Kitten, I don’t know how I could have been so blind.”
She removed the cloth and focused on him, creasing her brow. Just which of the many totally obvious things had he finally begun to see? He smiled enigmatically.
She missed that smile when his face grew stern again. “Now, brush your teeth, take a shower, get dressed, and be ready to leave in thirty minutes.”
“I’m not leaving Chicago with you, Adam.”
“I didn’t say anything about leaving Chicago.”
“Then where are we going?”
“Instant care, emergency room, clinic, your family physician—I don’t care where, but I’m not going to watch you waste away another day without finding out what’s wrong.”
Karla saw the intense worry in his eyes. Hell, he was scaring her now, too. It wasn’t like her to be sick. She hadn’t had the flu since she was fifteen. What did he think it might be? Then she realized he cared. Well, duh, Kitty. He’d always cared. He just didn’t care as deeply as she needed him to care about her.
“Adam, I need to talk with you about where I went last night.”
/>
His body tensed and he made a fist, then seemed to force himself to relax by unflexing his fists. He wasn’t going to be happy to hear what she and Grant had done, even if it was for his own good.
“We’ll talk later. I’ll see you downstairs in twenty-eight minutes.” He turned and walked into Ian’s room and she scrambled up to go to the sink and complete the first of the tasks he’d given her. He certainly was acting like her Master again. Or was it her Dom? It was hard to tell the difference sometimes. But damned if she wasn’t right there at his beck-and-call again, falling for Master Adam all over again.
In his car, he asked her where to take her and she pointed toward downtown. Their best hope would be instant care, but the thought of spending hours there didn’t really appeal to her. Maybe her mom could pull some strings, but she worked for a pediatrician. Karla hardly qualified for that kind of medical care. A few blocks from home, Adam pulled into a fast-food restaurant drive-through.
“Oh, please don’t tell me you intend for me to eat.”
“That’s exactly what I intend, kitten. What do you want for breakfast to tide you over until we get back to your mom’s and tackle some of those leftovers?”
Her mom had made Adam and Karla promise they’d finish up some of the food in the fridge. Both of her parents were working long shifts today. But what could she possibly order that would stay down this morning? Nothing fried or spicy, which would be half the breakfast items on the menu at this place. “How about a yogurt?” The glare he shot her across the seat told her that wasn’t going to cut it. “And a short stack of pancakes?”
“Better. But we’d better go inside for that.”
At the counter, he ordered about three times that much food. She hoped he planned to eat more than his fair share. At a table in the corner, with the food-laden tray beside them, he slapped butter on her pancakes and poured two containers of syrup on it before placing the Styrofoam plate in front her.
“I’m not a child. I can take care of myself.”
“Then prove it. Eat.”
She narrowed her eyes at him, but he just looked pointedly down at the three large pancakes and picked up the plastic fork and knife to dig in. Surprisingly, they tasted great and did ease the queasiness in her stomach. After she began eating, he seemed to relax and dug into his sausage and pancakes himself. Suddenly, she had an urge to add the yogurt to the pancakes and scooped it over the top.
“What the fuck are you doing? You’re still going to eat them, even if you do crap them up like that.”
She grinned up at him. “What’s it to you how I eat my pancakes?”
“Just saying you will finish them.”
“No problem. I just suddenly had a craving to have the two of them together. So, sue me.” To prove to him she intended to follow through, she picked up the fork and crammed her mouth too full with the combo she’d created. Hmmm. Not bad, she thought, as she chewed.
He rolled his eyes and dug back into his own breakfast. Maybe now was the time to tell him about last night. She swallowed, took a sip of OJ, and leaned forward. “Adam, about last night.”
He stopped mid-chew and stared at her, his fork poised mid-air. No easy way to do this, so she might as well just say it. “I found your mother. She wants to see you.”
“How’d you find her?”
That was it? He wasn’t surprised, even curious—or furious, as she’d expected?
“I had some…assistance.”
“Whose?”
She hoped Grant would understand why Karla ratted her out, but figured the Marine could hold her own with Adam, well, unless he restrained her. The thought of him restraining anyone but Karla made her stomach churn again.
“Grant.”
* * *
Grant had invaded his privacy? Adam would never have believed the former lance corporal—and friend with benefits for a few months, before Karla had come back into his life this summer—would do something like that. The woman had always been so damned loyal. What was her motive?
Karla held up her hand. “Don’t blame her. She was just doing me a favor.” She laid down her fork and reached out to touch his hand. "When you were in the hospital after the cougar attack, you said some things about your childhood…”
God fucking damn. “What did I say?” He shook off her hand and leaned back against the molded plastic seat he barely fit in. Karla looked hurt, before she reached out again to brush her hand gently over his forearm. The woman was like a pit bull with raw meat. He searched Karla’s intense blue eyes, trying to discern what she knew about his past. Thank God he hadn’t done to his father what he’d feared for the last month or so, because he wouldn’t have been able to offer her any kind of future if he had his father’s murder hanging over his head.
“Enough for me to know you didn’t have a very pleasant childhood. I thought maybe that had something to do with why…well, anyway, I wanted to track down the people who had…tormented my Dom and kick their asses until they apologized.”
Her Dom?
He fought to conceal a grin. “Is that so? Did you succeed?”
“Well, no. I soon realized she was just another victim of your father’s abuse.”
He sobered. She was, indeed. Adam held his breath as the fleeting images of the bloody scene flitted across his mind. They would never make sense to him, but at least he understood his non-aggressive part in the scene now.
But the past was the past. He couldn’t change what had happened then and knew, after talking with his mother, he wouldn’t let it continue to have power over him. Somehow, though, hearing Karla claim him as her Dom eased tension in places he’d kept closed off to emotions for a long time. He had no doubt she would be a fierce mama bear, protective of those she loved. Marc said she’d even tried to wrestle the cougar off him.
Karla had shown him nothing but love, even when he’d been a total douche bag to her. She loved him, without a doubt, making him the luckiest man who ever lived.
He wouldn’t be able to live another day without her. But he’d be damned if he’d tell her he loved her in a fucking fast-food restaurant. Still, he had a confession to make.
“Keep eating. There’s something I need to tell you.”
She took another bite of that disgusting concoction and chewed. When she swallowed and he still hadn’t spoken, she reached out to stroke his hand again. “What is it, Adam?”
He hated the thought of upsetting her when things were going better between them, but a Dom and his sub should have no secrets. She’d just said he was still her Dom, hadn’t she?
“I followed you last night.”
She pulled her hand back. “You what?” The pain in her eyes tore at his gut.
“I’ll admit, at first it was jealousy, pure and simple. But worrying about you trumped that. After what happened on your way back from Cassie’s, the thought of you driving around alone...”
“You didn’t trust me. I told you…”
“Don’t interrupt.”
She glanced down a moment, then met his gaze once more, a steely resolve in her fiery blue eyes.
Hurry up and fix this, jarhead.
Don’t you interrupt either, Joni.
God, he was losing his fucking mind.
He ran his hand through his hair, staring at his unfinished breakfast, then gazed up at her again. “I watched you go into the apartment, no idea who you were seeing, and then waited at the end of the hallway for you to leave. I did a lot of thinking out there. You were in there quite awhile.”
“We had a lot to talk about.”
“Don’t think I won’t turn you over my knee right here in this restaurant, if you don’t hear me out before you interrupt again.”
She leaned forward. “I’d like to see you try it.” Adam growled. But the flush that crept up her cheeks and the dilated pupils made his balls tighten. Maybe he still had a chance with her.
“By the time you left, I was feeling like a total ass. Long before you even came out, I’d
made up my mind not to go to the apartment to see who you’d been visiting. I knew you’d tell me when you were ready, if I needed to know. I did trust you, kitten.”
She smiled and he had an urge to take her out to the backseat of the rental and take her fast and hard. Damn it, man, get your fucking head under control. He reminded himself how sick she’d been this morning and where they were headed. But the pretty flush on her cheeks and the flaring of her nostrils didn’t indicate anything but a horny woman at the moment.
God, she might as well surrender to him now—and he didn’t mean sexually. Damned if he’d fuck up with her again. He may have driven to Chicago alone, but she'd be beside him for the return trip.
“There’s more. I ran into my brother and sister and they dragged me in to meet my mother.”
“You mean you’ve already met them all?”
“Yeah, and it went pretty well. I even promised I’d stop by to say goodbye before we head back to Denver. We can talk more about this later.” He looked down at her near empty plate. “You finished?” He rose as he asked the question and she nodded quickly and started putting the garbage on the tray. They quickly disposed of the trash and headed out to the car.
After holding the passenger door for her and making sure she was settled in her seat, he bent down, grabbed a fist full of hair, and tilted her head back. “You fucking turned me on in there, woman.” His lips bent down to hers and brushed hers for a fraction of a second before his tongue plunged into her sweet mouth. She tasted of syrup and Karla and he devoured her like a starving man. His hand reached down and into the opening of her coat to pinch her nipple. She groaned in pain and he felt as if he’d had ice water tossed in his face.
So sensitive. What if it wasn’t liver cancer? What if she had breast can…
Aw, Jesus Christ. What kind of fucking moron was he?
“Karla, when was your last period?”
With heavy-lidded eyes, she tried to focus on his face, panting for air. “Period?”
Why hadn’t he put it all together before? Hell, they’d had unprotected sex twice—exactly twice as many times as it would take to get her pregnant. Vomiting in the mornings, tender nipples, wild-ass combo cravings like yogurt and pancakes. With Joni, it had been oatmeal and peanut butter. Adam grinned when he remembered some of the interesting places he’d found for her to lick the peanut butter off him. But he’d drawn the line at the oatmeal. And he wasn’t too sure about yogurt and pancakes. Maybe he’d work with the syrup.
Nobody's Hero Page 36