“I have a new idea,” Rafe said, emptying the last of the wine into his glass, taking a drink. He joined us on the couch. I shuddered with anticipation, every filthy fantasy I’d been afraid to admit to myself rushing forward. I knew my cheeks flushed red.
“I have feelings for you both. I’m attracted to you both,” I tried to say, but I was slurring a little from all the wine.
“You can have anything you want, Lexi,” Rafe said, his mouth on mine.
I was still on Leo’s lap, Leo’s fingers plucking at my sensitive nipples, his hands hot inside my blouse. But it was Rafe who was twisting my hair away from my face so he could kiss my jawline, my cheek and the corner of my mouth. It was the same way I’d kissed him that first time, the tentative brush against the edge of his mouth. I wrapped one arm around his neck as he kissed me.
While Rafe was kissing me, Leo fastened his mouth to my nipple, sucking me hot and wet through my lace bra. I gasped, and Rafe took my cry in his mouth, drawing on me low and deep. A long shudder rolled through me, their mouths on me both at once. I was whispering yes into Rafe’s mouth, my tongue mating with his. Then I wrenched my mouth from his to meet Leo’s eyes. He took my mouth with his, kissing me so deeply I could have wept. I groaned and ground myself against his growing erection. I reminded myself I was safe with them. They wanted me like this. I could go a little wild if I wanted to.
So I did.
I took Rafe’s hand, the one that was caressing my bare neck, and guided it down inside my open blouse, let him fondle and pluck at my nipples. I felt his hands drag my shirt the rest of the way off, his mouth travel from my shoulder and collarbone to the slope of my soft breast. Teasing the tip of his tongue around the rim of my nipple, he drove me mad. I whispered please, please into the heat of Leo’s mouth. I didn’t know what I was begging him for, because I was already getting everything from two gorgeous men.
Then Rafe was pulling me up. Confused, I looked at him. “This way,” he said, turning my body, lying me across Leo’s lap. Leo grinned and bent over me, his lips on my forehead, my nose, my mouth again. He was an amazing kisser, tender and lewd at once. I felt my body rev up, wetness coating my sex and my upper thighs. That was where Rafe was, my upper thighs. He worked my pants down, yanked them off. Before I could ask what he was doing, his mouth was low on my stomach, a thrum starting just below my belly button, a throbbing as my sex started to clench around nothing, empty and longing. Then his mouth was hot and wet, flitting between my legs. He dragged the warm flat of his tongue along the seam of my sensitive, throbbing slit. I whimpered. Even through my panties it was a sharp sensation. My head went back, Leo’s tongue sliding fully into my mouth. The strokes of his tongue somehow matched up with what Rafe was doing, flicking his tongue against my swollen bud, his thumbs stroking the puffy, quivering lips of my pussy.
I was crying out in no time, legs jerking on either side of Rafe’s head. I felt his stubble scrape the inside of my thighs, my fingers tangling in his dark hair. I bucked against his mouth, shaking. Leo trailed his blunt tipped fingers down my neck and chest, dipping his fingers into the lacy cup of my bra as my breasts strained against the fabric, my chest heaving with every breath. He plucked at my nipple, pinched it softly, sent a bolt of sharp, white-hot pleasure down my body. I bucked against Rafe’s mouth again, screaming my pleasure into Leo’s parted lips, his tongue lapping up my cries, soothing me at the same time he drove me to the brink of madness. Still jerking with shocks of pleasure, I curled in on myself, trembling. I pulled away from them both, a sob catching in my throat. It had been too much, too intense. I had felt claimed, ravished, and worshipped all at once. I’d had two mouths, two wicked tongues, four questing hands lavishing attention on my body. A shudder of remembered bliss racked my body again at the thought.
“Hey, come here,” Rafe said. I shook my head but crawled into his lap as he had asked.
He cradled me against his chest, kissed my hair and stroked my back. Leo came close, took my hands and kissed them. I stroked his face, his cheeks and jaw with tears in my eyes.
“How is this possible?” I whispered incredulously.
“How is it not?” Rafe said. “We were open with each other from the beginning that we each wanted you. That we were up for anything if you made the move, that we’d never fight over you. Doesn’t it make sense that we could share? That the three of us together had such an easy time fitting together that it’s a natural extension of that closeness. We both want you. We both protect you. We both go crazy over you in the white t-shirt you sleep in or the sheep tank top—really, all your pajamas are filthy to look at,” he smirked.
“Really? I thought they were just worn out and cheap.”
“Trust me, baby,” Leo said, his hands stroking my wrists and arms, “Nothing about you is worn out or cheap. Whatever you have on I always want to peel off. Have you even found all the buttons from this morning?”
I shook my head, “I didn’t know this was possible. I never knew I was allowed to want this.”
“Do you then?” Rafe pressed. “How are you feeling? Are you uncomfortable?”
I shook my head, let my grin break through, “No, I feel like the luckiest woman in the world right now. You’re both incredible. I can’t believe you even still like me, much less that you want to—”
“Be with you,” Rafe finished for me.
“Stay together,” Leo said.
“So where do you want to sleep?” Rafe said, “His place or mine?”
“Until this morning when I fell asleep with you,” I said to Leo, “I’ve never shared a bed.”
Leo gathered me into his lap, kissed my temple and the top of my head. He rocked me back and forth softly. I felt something unknot inside me that I didn’t realize was there, something tense and lonesome. Tears sprang to my eyes. I felt so loved, so cherished. I felt Rafe’s big hand on my back, stroking in slow circles, soothing me. I was surrounded by people who cared about me, extraordinary, compassionate men who were sexy as hell. Men who were strong and confident enough to share me without jealousy or silly macho posturing. The kind of man a girl meets once in a lifetime if she’s damn lucky. And here I was, twice in a lifetime, with two of the best, most incredible guys ever.
“I want to stay here with you. For as long as you’ll have me,” I confessed, reaching out and hugging them both at once.
I was right. I was the luckiest girl in the world.
9
Rafe
Every night was a night in for us, curled up on the couch with popcorn and beer and Lexi. We watched bad reality TV. We played a cutthroat game of Call of Duty, in which we found out that adorable social worker Lexi cussed a blue streak into the headset when she was cornered. She accidentally called me a motherfucker because I wasn’t in the right spot when she needed me. Leo had rolled off the couch laughing so hard. I had choked on my beer. She hadn’t even realized it until we told her.
Her competitive side was another thing we liked about her. One morning, I hid behind the laundry room door and jumped out to scare her. She screamed and swore and smacked me on the arm, surprised and embarrassed. She tried to get me back, but she got Leo instead.
The shrill screech I heard sent me careening into the bathroom where Leo was pointing at her and breathing hard, his dick in his hand, while she was laughing, doubled over on the bathroom floor.
“She was in the goddamn basket!” Leo kept saying over and over, “I could’ve pissed all up and down the wall. I could’ve fallen and hit my head.”
“Yeah, explain why you need a sick day for that,” she chuckled. “My roommate scared me, and I bumped my head on the toilet.”
I had high-fived her, and Leo gave me the finger.
When Leo had to go back on nights at the fire station, I knew I had an evening alone with Lexi. We’d talked about our boundaries, our expectations, among the three of us. We wouldn’t date other people. We all tested clean at the clinic. She was on birth control. We were open to sharing her wit
hout jealousy as long as we were open in our communication. So when I planned dinner and more with her, I wasn’t going to keep it a secret.
When she got home from work and kicked off her shoes, I had ordered Chinese and run her a bath.
“A bath? You’re an angel,” she said, unbuttoning her shirt as she disappeared into the bathroom. “I’ll be out in a few minutes. Maybe more than a few. It’s been a hell of a day.”
She was in there for maybe ten minutes before I knocked on the door.
“Come in,” she said. Her voice wasn’t seductive or shocked. It was just Lexi, just accepting and sweet.
She was still in the bathtub, her hair wet and hanging around her shoulders. The bubbles were only in places floating on the filmy water like islands. My hands itched to reach for her.
“The food’s here,” I said, unable to keep my hungry gaze from feasting.
I ran my hand over my hair, rubbed the back of my neck, feeling like I was a teenager again. I could see the swell of her breasts under the water and wanted to put my mouth on them. I wanted to drag her out of the tub, dripping wet, and put my mouth on her slick nipples, see if I could make her scream again with my mouth between her legs. I blinked to clear the image of her writhing and kicking with release on the blue bathroom rug.
“What’re you smiling about?” she said, but she was smiling too. I shook my head.
“I better not.”
“Why not?” she challenged, “You don’t have to be shy with me, Rafe. We talked about this, all three of us.”
“Suddenly, the only thing I want to taste is you.”
I saw her shiver, right there in the tub. She blinked faster, her cheeks flushing.
“Come here,” I said, bending over her.
I leaned in and kissed her mouth, soft and sweet, just like I remembered from the night she woke up crying. But I went deeper, stroking my tongue in her mouth, her wet hands gripping my shirt.
“I got you wet,” she said, biting her lip.
“Then I should return the favor,” I told her archly.
I picked her up out of the tub and stood her on the rug. She grabbed a towel, not to cover herself, but to start drying off. I was glad she wasn’t hiding her body from me. She was short and curved in the right places, her hips fuller than I expected, her small breasts perfect with tight pink nipples. I snaked my arm around her waist and covered her left nipple with my mouth, sucking it between my lips and rolling my tongue over it. I felt her jerk, heard her gasp. Her wet, slippery skin, the flowery taste of her soap, all of it threatened to overwhelm me. I went to my knees, kissed my way down the curve of her stomach. I lifted her right leg, hooked the knee over my shoulder and buried my face between her legs.
“Oh God,” I said against her soft heat. I loved it, loved the slippery salty flavor of her, the plump lips I spread with my fingers and made her shudder. I ate her for a few minutes, licking and sucking. When I reached her clit, I tugged it with my lips, flicked the tip of my tongue over it as her legs quivered and she sobbed my name.
I stopped, leaving her right on the edge, and stood up. I kissed her with the taste of her sex still in my mouth. “I’m going to have you tonight. All of you.”
She whimpered, a pout of frustration on her lips. She rocked against me, her nipples tight and hard against my wet shirt. She tipped her face up to mine, her fingers playing at the back of my neck. She rubbed her lips along my jaw, her hands in my hair. She kissed my neck, softly at first, and I felt the roll of warm arousal until she bit me, sucking hard at my neck. I groaned.
“So, did you get the chop suey I like?” she asked brightly, moving past me and slipping on the sheep tank top and stepping into her pink flannel pants.
She combed her wet hair and twisted it up into a messy bun. While I stood there with my mouth half open just contemplating the fact that she had bitten me on the throat and wasn’t wearing underwear of any kind. My brain couldn’t compute either of those things, much less how cheerful she sounded. I was pretty sure I growled low in the back of my throat before turning to follow her to the kitchen.
I watched her open a bottle of wine without even offering to help. She poured two glasses and handed me one. I drank like I was parched. I wasn’t sure that I could sit across from her at the table and eat. It was possible that I’d climb up on the table, knock everything off of it and start devouring her from head to toe. She sat down like it was nothing, like I hadn’t just taken her to the edge of ecstasy and backed off. Maybe it was revenge, her driving me crazy as payback.
She stared flipping paper cartons open and poking around at the contents like she was a normal person ready to eat supper and not the woman I was five seconds from ravishing on the nearest surface. She cut her eyes to me, looking ready to laugh.
“You look like the big bad wolf right now,” she said.
It was all I could do not to growl in response. As it was, she rounded the table and perched on my knee, “What’s with the crazy eyes?”
“God, Lexi,” I groaned, dropping my forehead against her shoulder, my arms tight around her. “I want to take things slow with you, show you everything I feel, but I don’t know if I have the willpower to do it that way.”
“I kind of doubt it, since you came in to tell me the food was here and started going down on me like a horny teenager, only with better skills.”
“I’m not sure I can hold off.”
“Have you tried thinking about basketball? That’s what my boyfriend used to do senior year,” she teased.
“Did it work?”
“No. He never lasted more than about twenty seconds. I wouldn’t describe it as a satisfying experience.”
“That doesn’t make me feel better. I may be just as much of a disappointment tonight.”
“What?” she said, her hand on my face, making me look up at her. “You could never disappoint me. Never. God, Rafe, I think I fell for you the first day we met. I didn’t say it, and I’m still scared to say it now, but there was no way to help it. I just knew from how you were so careful with me, so kind, and then you wanted nothing more than to teach me how to protect myself.”
“That’s not true,” I told her. “I wanted to protect you myself. I wanted to rip that guy’s fucking head off with my bare hands. Then I wanted to take you out to my car and show you what back seats are for. None of that sounds anything like the guy you say you fell for.”
“Sure it does,” she said. “You were strong and patient and a total gentleman with me, but that doesn’t mean I need you to be a saint. In fact, I’m hoping you’ll be more of a sinner tonight.”
She licked her lips. She was two inches from my face and she fucking licked her lips. What did she think I was going to do then?
I took her face in both my hands, cradling her jaw, stroking her cheeks, and I bumped my lips against hers. Her lips clung to mine, soft and longing. She opened for me easily when I parted her lips, when I flicked my tongue along her top lip playfully and felt her shiver. It was delicious. I tasted the crisp, sweet wine and the flavor of her that I got from going deep in her mouth, bending her head back and taking her mouth all the way. I didn’t hold back, didn’t try to be gentle or tease a response from her. I did what I had to, getting my fill of her. She rubbed against my chest, her skin hot and her nipples hard. I palmed her breast, brushed her nipple with my thumb just to feel her buck.
We were about a minute and a half from fucking on the kitchen chair, and the only thing that stopped me was the knowledge that the table and chairs weren’t in great shape. They wouldn’t stand up to the pounding I was going to give Lexi. So I picked her up. She twisted, got her legs around me and held on. It was hot as hell knowing she wanted me to carry her, that she was ready to climb me.
I took her to my bed, my mouth never leaving hers. I stood her on the mattress and jerked her flannel pants down, burying my face in her belly. She clutched my head, hands sifting through my hair, as I kissed her navel. I slid my hand between her legs, cupping her m
ound and tracing her outer lips with my fingers, teasingly soft. She was wet for me, God, so wet. I ran my tongue over the rim of her navel and felt her legs quiver. I took my hand away and she mewed a protest. I grazed her thighs, her ass, gave her a squeeze. Then I put my mouth to her, licking her clit in one tight stroke. She slumped to her knees as if her legs gave out. I chuckled. But not for long.
Lexi wound her arms around my neck. She kissed my cheek, licked my ear and then whispered to me. “I care about you, Rafe. I always have. I think I’m falling for you. I can’t wait any longer to have you. Please.”
Her words were like a fire in my blood then, and my body heated, my already throbbing cock hardening painfully. I ground my teeth. She was wrapped around me, naked from the waist down. I had to get myself under control or it would be over faster than her high school boyfriend got off. I wrapped her in my arms and held her against me. My mouth found her neck. I leashed myself, kissing and nipping lightly, not letting myself mark her or flip her onto the bed and bury my cock inside her without the slightest warning. I loved hearing her say that she wanted me and had all along. It melted me and wound me up at the same time.
Crushing her against my chest, I kissed her damp hair and unwound it from the elastic she’d used to bind it. I threaded my fingers through her locks, dragging my lips down her cheek until I could meet her lips with mine.
“I love you, Lexi,” I said into her mouth. She shook her head and drew back, apparently less sexually galvanized by my confession than I had been by hers. I saw tears shine in her eyes.
“You can’t mean that,” she said.
“Why the hell can’t I mean that? It’s true,” I said. I wanted to shake her, to fuck her helpless until she believed me.
“Because no one has ever said that to me. Never. Not my whole life,” she said, her voice shaking. Her words twisted in my chest.
“I’ll be damned if you live another day without hearing it. Without hearing it every day. Maybe no one saw you before for who you really are, but I see you and goddammit, Lexi. I love you. You have to believe that,” I practically growled. She slumped into my arms. I held her close, her tears gutting me.
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