Color Me Blind (A Divine Love Story Book 1)

by Melinda Michelle

  He brought his lips back to hers and kissed her like his life depended on it. She felt her control slipping. She was surprised that she wanted it to slip. That’s when she knew she had to stop. Jasmine pulled away trying to catch her breath.

  “Blake wait. We have to stop now or I won’t be able to.”

  His eyes were on hers. They were dark and smoldering with a yearning for her. His mind was in agreement but his body not so much. His breathing was labored.

  He said in a husky voice, “Okay babe, but just give me a second okay. Don’t touch me for the next few minutes.”

  She laughed and moved away from him, “Thanks.”

  They lay beside each other in silence for several minutes. Jasmine began to cry uncontrollably.

  Blake sat up alarmed, “Hey what’s wrong?”

  Her heart couldn’t handle the emotional roller coaster it was on. Something had to give.

  She said, “I miss him so much Blake. It’s not fair. He didn’t deserve it. He was a good person. How do we just walk around this house knowing he will never come home again?”

  His heart sank. He knew exactly where she was coming from. He hadn’t really grieved either. How could he when they were out of sync. He wrapped her in his arms as his own pain slid quietly from his eyes.

  “Shhh baby, it’s okay. I miss him too. We just have to take it one day at a time.”

  “Blake, I don’t know how to do this.”

  “I thought you were the one who said even if you don’t agree with God’s plan you accept it.”

  She sniffled, “I’m not angry with God. I’m angry with the people that killed him. I’m angry at him for going out alone. Even though I’m willing to accept that God allowed it to happen it still hurts. I still have to miss him every day.”

  Blake let that marinate for a little while as he continued to comfort Jasmine. After a while her sobs began to ease. He continued to stroke her back.

  He said, “I’m sorry baby I know this is hard. It’s going to be hard on everyone but we will be okay. The five of us will be okay.”

  She nodded and continued to hold on tight.

  He said, “I really don’t understand how you cannot be mad at God. After everything we’ve seen and been through why do you keep letting him off the hook? I mean if he’s God then this kind of stuff doesn’t’ have to happen. So why does it?”

  Jasmine knew Blake struggled with his relationship with God and she understood why. She knew this was an opportunity to be a witness for Christ. She didn’t want to mess it up. Jasmine sat up and wiped her eyes.

  “Listen honey, I get your frustration, I really do. One of the main things I try to remember about my relationship with God is that He is in control. Everyone has the freedom to make their choices. We’re given information and then we make a choice. Some people think they don’t really have a choice but in actuality they do. They just don’t want to deal with the consequences of the harder choice.”

  “Okay, we have a choice. What does that have to do with God being in control?”

  She knew she needed another tactic.

  “Look at it like this. The same God that told me to give your father my kidney is the same one that for whatever reason did not stop this from happening. I believe some things God causes and some things he just allows to happen.”

  “Meaning?”

  “Look at what happened when I gave your father my kidney. At first it seemed like all hell was going to break loose and nothing good could come out of it but look at all of us now. You’re relationship with your father is better than ever. I actually have a relationship with your father and your parents act like they’re on their honeymoon these days. That one thing changed all those other things.”

  “Okay so you’re saying that whenever something bad happens I should try to find what good can come out of it.”

  “Yes, that’s what I’m saying.”

  “Whatever good I can find that came from Ahmed’s death won’t make me feel better about losing him.”

  “I agree with that, but that’s the part where you just have to accept that God is sovereign and that there is a master plan.”

  “So what good things can we say came from losing our friend?”

  “Me and you. We finally let go of all of our fears and are giving love a chance. Losing him made us realize just how precious life truly is. We shouldn’t waste it on stuff that doesn’t really matter in the grand scheme of things.”

  “Okay. I’ll add Carmen and Damon.”

  “Right, now is he playing with her or does he really like her? I love my Damon but, I will cause him great pain if he hurts her,” Jasmine said with no humor.

  “Oh trust me, he is definitely into Carmen. I don’t think he would ever hurt her like that. She means too much to him. Jasmine is any of this worth Ahmed’s life?”

  “No, I don’t think we will ever see it that way. In my mind I wish we could have it both ways, Ahmed to see us all together. But see, that’s just it. We can’t know what’s ahead in the future. We can’t know if this hadn’t happened if any of these things would be. We also can’t know what is in the future for these relationships or what they will bring into the world. We don’t know what our children will be or who’s lives we will touch and how. I heard a pastor say once you don’t marry a person you marry a destiny. Who knows what we are destined to do as a couple.”

  “I guess that’s one way to look at it.”

  “See that’s the advantage that God has over us, He knows. There’s always going to be little things in life that trigger great things. Just like I’m grateful for what God did through me donating my kidney I’m not going to pick and choose which of God’s plans I like and don’t like. With Him it’s all or nothing.”

  “I understand what you’re saying baby, but I think it’s going to take me a little longer to get to acceptance.”

  She stroked his face, “I know baby. Let me give you one last thing to think about. I’m not mad at God about his death because his grace and mercy is so sufficient.”

  “What do you mean by that?”

  “God made sure that Ahmed knew Him and accepted Jesus as his personal Lord and Savior before he left this earth. That’s God. That’s sovereign. So his eternity is taken care of. That’s what really matters.”

  He stared at her for a long moment while he let it all sink in. As it did, something began to prick his heart. He didn’t exactly know what it was though.

  He confessed, “I am so grateful for whatever brought you to me like this because I don’t think I could have kept going if I couldn’t be with you.”

  She kissed him softly and lay on his chest.

  “I love you Blake, more than you will ever know.”

  “I may have an idea because there are no words for the way I feel about you.”

  Chapter 39: Heart to Heart

  Blake and Jasmine were in the kitchen making breakfast which consisted of bacon, eggs and grits. The breakfast was coming along very slowly because they kept stopping to kiss, tickle or hug each other.

  Damon descended the stairs and headed to the kitchen for some juice. What he saw caught him off guard. He had to remember what had transpired the night before.

  Jasmine and Blake were blocking the refrigerator as they were locked in an intimate embrace. He noticed that Blake’s hand rested possessively on Jasmine’s backside. Damon cleared his throat. Blake looked up and smiled. Embarrassed, Jasmine buried her face in Blake’s chest.

  Damon asked as his eyes landed on Blake’s hand, “I thought you weren’t into that dawg.”

  Blake grinned, “A very wise man once told me that one could learn to get into that.”

  Damon laughed and extended his fist for a bump.

  “Now can y’all please get from in front of the fridge? I’m thirsty.”

  Jasmine asked, “Hey where is Carmen and Lucy? We have some important stuff we need to discuss.”

  Damon replied, “Carmen should be down any minute. I don’t
know if Lucy is here or not.”

  Blake picked up a cell phone that was on the counter and dialed Lucy.

  “Hey are you home?” He waited for her response. “Okay see you soon.”

  When he hung up Damon and Jasmine stared at him waiting for an explanation.

  Blake said, “She is actually on her way home now, about five minutes away. Enough already. We need to meet this guy she’s been creeping with.”

  They both nodded. As Damon was sipping his juice Carmen descended the stairs with a Cheshire cat grin on her face. Jasmine gave her a knowing look and laughed. It made Carmen blush. Damon poured her a glass of juice and brought it to her as she sat at the table. The two of them joined them at the table with breakfast to wait for Lucy.

  Carmen asked, “Why does everyone look so serious?”

  Blake answered, “Serious business to discuss.”

  His somber look gave Carmen pause. Before she could ask Lucy popped her head into the front door.

  She looked to be in a good mood.

  “Morning guys! Why is everyone sitting at the table staring at me?”

  Damon said, “We were just discussing who you been tiptoeing with and why we don’t know him.”

  Lucy rolled her eyes as she sat next to Carmen. She stole Carmen’s glass and took a sip.

  Jasmine said, “Let’s say grace people.”

  They all bowed their heads as Jasmine blessed the food.

  As they began to dig in Blake said, “Okay guys it’s time to have that talk. Jasmine and I were discussing some things last night about Ahmed’s final wishes. It’s about time we dealt with it.”

  The mention of Ahmed’s name brought a very somber, painful mood on the moment of breaking bread together.

  Lucy asked, “Do we have to do this now?”

  Jasmine responded, “Yeah sweetie, we do.”

  Carmen said, “Okay then, just spit it out.”

  Blake took the floor, “Okay guys as his attorney you were made aware that Ahmed made out a living will. Ahmed was a very well off young man. He was very risky in his investments and it paid off. You know how much of a stickler he was about finances and saving for his future. It was his desire to pay off the rest of this house. I sent the check over-night yesterday and we should be getting the deed to the property any day now.”

  There were stunned faces all over except Jasmine because she already knew.

  “He also left $10,000 to each of us to be used to start a college fund for our first born.”

  More shocked faces.

  Damon asked, “Dude seriously?”

  Jasmine nodded, “You know how Ahmed was about planning.”

  Blake said, “So now that the house is paid off there are some decisions that need to be made.”

  He got up and went to a drawer in the kitchen and pulled out four manila folders. He handed each of them the one that had their name on it.

  He said, “So over the past week I kind of buried myself in work trying to avoid dealing with the Jasmine drama.” She elbowed him and they all laughed. “But since I knew I was going to pop the question it got me to thinking about where we will all go from here because I know you guys don’t want to be here with me and Jaz all over each other.”

  It took a few seconds for them to comprehend what he said.

  Lucy choked on her eggs, “Oh my God Jasmine you’re wearing a freakin’ diamond!”

  Carmen dropped her fork and snatched up Jasmine’s left hand.

  She said, “How in the world did we miss this iceberg sitting on your finger?”

  Jasmine grinned in response.

  Damon shook his head and said, “I see y’all two ain’t playing no games.”

  Lucy chastised, “How could you not call us and tell us the moment this happened?”

  Jasmine smiled, “Um, I was a little busy hanging out with my fiancé.”

  Lucy rolled her eyes, “I just bet you were.”

  Damon gave Blake a hopeful stare.

  Blake shook his head and said, “Still blue.”

  The two men shared a laughed that was lost on the women.

  Blake asked, “Can we please focus on the business at hand?”

  Carmen demanded, “We want details immediately following this meeting.”

  Jasmine replied, “Deal.”

  “Anyway,” Blake continued, “So I got to thinking our original plan was to turn this place into a bed and breakfast. It looks like we will meet our goal a year early. In your folders you will find real estate listings. Ahmed made sure that we were all financially secure and made good decisions with our money. We’ve been living here for almost six years so our expenses have been pretty minimal. I have found each of us, well me and Jaz’s are together, three listings to choose from. We will all be still within fifteen miles of each other and this place.”

  Each of them opened their folders and began to look at the listings.

  Jasmine asked, “So you just knew I was going to say yes, huh. That’s why I don’t have my own folder?”

  He laughed, kissed her hard and gave her a cocky grin. She smiled and rolled her eyes.

  He went on, “Knowing each of you the way I do I think you will see that I picked some great prospects based on what I knew you’d like.” He kissed Jasmine again. “See, being annoyed with you made me very productive.”

  She gently pinched him.

  He said, “Carmen each of yours has a huge kitchen. Lucy each of yours is very modern in design and Damon each of yours are architectural works of genius.”

  As each of them browsed they were nodding their approval.

  Carmen asked, “You guys know what this means? I can’t believe we’re not going to be living together anymore.”

  Lucy leaned her head on Carmen’s shoulder and wrapped her arms around her waist.

  Lucy said, “Growing up is so not fun.”

  Damon said, “Well at least we won’t be that far away from each other and we can just rotate whoever’s house we hang out at that week.”

  The moment was bittersweet for each of them.

  Damon asked, “So what’s the plan to turn this place into a B&B?”

  Jasmine said, “Okay this parts my turn. Let me just get this off my chest now. You guys, Ahmed knew he was going to die.”

  She paused to let them absorb it. She could tell by the look on their faces that they needed a moment.

  She gave it a few more beats then said, “When he called me into the room he told me. Please don’t be mad that I didn’t tell you guys. How could I when I was praying that it wouldn’t be true. There were a couple things he told me that I want to share. One is that a week before he went to church with Victoria he gave his life to Christ, which has given me so much peace in my time of grief. Even though I know we are all in different places where that is concerned I hope it gives you all some peace as well. He’s okay. He’s actually better than okay.”

  Carmen, Lucy and Damon all shared a look that had Blake and Jasmine aware that they were missing something.

  Blake asked, “What is it?”

  Carmen said, “Well Jasmine, with everything that’s been going on we’ve all kind of been thinking that maybe we should give this church thing a try.”

  Jasmine’s mouth involuntarily fell open.

  Lucy laughed, “We decided that we want to start going to church with you on Sundays.”

  Jasmine’s hand went to her heart. She put her head down to say a silent prayer of thanks for yet another answered prayer.

  Damon said, “It’s about time we give this God of yours a try, maybe find out where you get your resolve from to stay so strong.”

  Carmen added, “Jazzy, you were never preachy to us and you don’t judge us because we’re not living by the same standards you try to. Even though we know you feel some of the things we do are wrong you’ve still remained a great friend to each of us. You led by example and that’s something we can respect.”

  Blake was shocked as well. That same tugging he felt on
his heart the night before was back.

  Jasmine said with unshed tears in her eyes, “Oh my God, you guys don’t know what this means to me. I’m so happy. I’m so excited about what God is going to do in each of your lives.”

  Carmen smiled, “Was there a number two?”

  Jasmine was momentarily flustered, “Oh yes of course, sorry you guys completely threw me off my thought process. The second thing was he wanted to do something for Alyssa. He said she saved his life and he wanted to do whatever he could for her. He said she has a little girl and I think he wanted to get her out of her situation of just being a grocery store cashier. So here is my suggestion. You guys let me know if you’re down. I was thinking that we set up a scholarship in Ahmed’s name for Alyssa and the five of us put her through school for him.”

  She paused to gauge their reactions. They all gave her poker faces.

  “You guys I know we don’t really know her but Ahmed adored her. We are all so fortunate. We won’t have to pay for her room and board if we offer her the position to manage the B&B. We can afford to give her a decent salary. It was Ahmed’s financial planning that put us in a position to be able to do this. We may have never gotten the chance to see him alive again if it wasn’t for her. Okay, somebody say something.”

  Jasmine was nervous. She had discussed it with Blake. Of course he was on board. He always had her back, but she waited patiently for her roommates to respond.

  Lucy said, “I’m in.”

  Carmen replied, “Me too.”

  They all looked at Damon.

  He said, “If we send our family to stay here when they come to visit do you think she’ll let us get a discount?”

  They all laughed.

  Damon said, “Of course I’m in. I can’t think of a better way to acknowledge Ahmed’s legacy.”

  Blake said, “Great, then it’s settled. The realtor is expecting calls from each of us next week to set up times to go view the houses.”

  Damon looked at Carmen and asked, “Wanna look at houses together?”

  She goggled at him.

  He laughed and said, “I’m just playing relax.”

  Truthfully he was half serious but he wanted to see where she was. Carmen had him by the heart strings and he didn’t know what the next step was. This was all brand new to him. He didn’t think he was ready to put a rock on her finger like Blake had done but he knew the thought of losing her was one he didn’t want to entertain. Would she feel like she didn’t mean as much if he offered to move in with her versus marrying her? This was the first time he’d ever felt bad about sleeping with a woman and not being married to her. Where had that come from? He’d have to give that some serious thought. With this new approach they were taking to know God he knew that was something he had to take very seriously.