Ghost of a Chance

by Jade Falconer

  "As ready as I'll ever be.” He looked around. “Don't you need, like candles and incense and spooky music?” he teased, hands on hips. “And you should be wearing a turban. Or a long gauzy dress."

  Ryan rolled his eyes. “Gauze is so last season,” he smirked. “Just sit on the floor and put the glass upside down in the center of the table."

  "Yes sir,” James replied, sitting down across from Ryan. He put the glass down where Ryan instructed. “Now what?"

  Ryan reached over to the glass and gingerly put two fingers on it. “Put your fingers on it, and then we're gonna circle it around to call the spirit to us, okay?” He waited for James to touch it before moving the glass in a broad circle on the table. He looked up at the ceiling. “If you're here, would you answer a few questions for us?” he asked softly, bringing the glass to a full stop in the center of the table.

  James watched Ryan's face. Ryan's eyes were fixed on the glass. After a moment, it started, very slowly, to move. He looked quickly at James’ face. “You're not moving it, are you?” he whispered. A moment later it stopped next to the piece of paper on which he'd written ‘yes'.

  James widened his eyes in an innocent expression, and shook his head.

  Ryan chewed on his bottom lip. “Are you the fourteenth Earl of Elgin?” he asked. His heart was pounding.

  They watched as the glass moved once again.

  The glass moved to the center of the table and then slowly back to the ‘yes’ again. His eyes widened and he looked at James again. “You sure you're not moving it?” he whispered.

  "I'm not. I promise. I thought you were,” James whispered back, eyes a little wide.

  Ryan swallowed and licked his lips. “Why did you push me onto the floor, last night?” he asked boldly. Almost instantly, the glass started moving again, more quickly this time, almost slipping out of their fingers entirely. Ryan gasped. It stopped first at the d, then to e-p-r-a-v-e-, and then d in rapid succession. Ryan blinked. “Depraved? What was depraved? It was only a backrub,” he protested.

  James blushed a little. “A voyeuristic ghost, great,” he whispered.

  Just then the glass flew across the room and smashed into the fireplace. Ryan stared, going pale. “Holy shit,” he said softly. “Did you bring another glass?” he asked.

  "Yeah,” James said, reaching over and handing Ryan the other glass. He looked over at the broken glass. “I think we pissed him off."

  Ryan put the new glass in the center of the table and put his fingers on it again. “We're sorry. We didn't mean to offend you,” he said softly. “Are you saying that what we were doing was depraved?” he asked. The glass started to move slowly again. s-i-n-t-o-t-o-u-c-h-a-n-o-t-h-e-r-m-a-n.

  "Sin to touch another man?” James said softly, blushing once again. “A homophobic voyeuristic ghost?” He looked up at Ryan. “Well, that would explain the pushing."

  Ryan frowned a little. “It was just a backrub.” Of course, it was more to him, and the ghost would surely know that if he could sense things about him. “Are you going to continue judging everything I do?” he asked, a little concerned. The glass started to move again. p-e-r-v-e-r-t-s-s-h-o-u-l-d-n-o-t-b-e-e-a-r-l.

  "He's not a fucking pervert!” James snapped, then subsided. “Sorry. This is pissing me off.” He looked at Ryan apologetically.

  Ryan felt both embarrassed and gratified at once. He smiled across the table at James. “Thanks,” he said quietly. Then there was clearly a sound of laughter. A man's laughter. Ryan was shivering now. “We should stop,” he said, biting his lip. “Spirit of the fourteenth Earl, please find your rest and leave us be. Good night.” He took his fingers off the glass and wrapped his arms around himself.

  James shivered a little. “Okay, that was freaky.” He looked over at Ryan, then got up and went around to his side. He wrapped his arms around the other man and whispered, “Are you all right?"

  Ryan leaned against James, enjoying the safety and warmth of his arms around him. “Yeah. I'm okay. That was creepy.” He rested his head on James’ shoulder. It felt so nice. “It wouldn't really do us any serious harm, right? I mean, people don't get killed by ghosts."

  "I thought there was no such thing as ghosts, so what do I know?” James answered. “But maybe you shouldn't be alone here. You know, until we figure out what's really going on."

  Ryan lifted his head and looked into James’ eyes. “I hate making you feel like you have to babysit me, James.” The last thing he wanted was to become a burden. He was so infatuated with James.

  James swallowed hard, looking into Ryan's dark eyes. “I don't feel that way,” he whispered. “I like being here. With you."

  Ryan smiled. “I like you being here, too. I don't know what I would have done without you, James,” he said softly. “You must be exhausted after working all evening and then all this. Do you want something to eat or drink? Can I do anything for you?"

  James hesitated. “I could use a coffee,” he finally said.

  Ryan pulled reluctantly away and stood up, holding his hand out to help James up. “I think you should supervise. I might not make it as good as you do,” he said, smiling at him.

  Just then, Ryan heard a voice close in his ear. “Good idea,” it whispered.

  Ryan almost jumped out of his skin. “Did you hear that?” he asked.

  "No, what did you hear?” James asked with alarm as he got up.

  Maybe he was imagining it. He took a deep breath. “Nothing. It was nothing,” he said, shaking himself. “Let's go.” He took James’ hand and walked with him to the kitchen.

  When they got there Ryan stopped in the doorway. There was a man sitting on a counter.

  "He can't see me. Only you can,” the man said conversationally. The ghost was definitely a different one than the Earl in the portrait. He was slender and had shoulder-length, wavy brown hair, and was dressed quite nicely. He seemed young, and was quite attractive in a waifish way, almost pretty.

  James bumped into Ryan when he stopped in the doorway. “What's wrong?” he asked, peering around Ryan into the room.

  "You have nothing to fear from me,” the ghost said. “Just act normally. If you can,” he said,

  Ryan stepped into the room. “Nothing. It's fine. I'm just freaked out.” He walked over to the counter with the coffee pot.

  James glanced around a little nervously. “It seems awfully cold in here,” he observed. He leaned against the counter, oblivious. “You want me to make the coffee?"

  Ryan smiled at him. “Sure. I'll watch how you do it and make it for you in the morning, okay?” Suddenly the ghost was beside him and he bit back a gasp.

  "He is utterly adorable. Reminds me of an old friend. Don't worry about that old killjoy, Maxim. He's just in denial. I heard he had a crush on his piano tutor,” he said, chuckling. Ryan couldn't stop himself from smirking at that.

  James looked at Ryan a bit oddly, then got the coffee out of the cabinet. He began to measure it out into the machine, then he said, “Are you hearing things again? Not like hearing things like you're crazy, you know what I mean."

  "Are you sure you wanna know?” Ryan asked. “Yeah. There's another ghost here. A different one. I can see him as clearly as I can see you, and he's talking to me. He told me you couldn't see him.” He thought for sure James was going to think he was crazy now.

  "No, I think he'll believe you. He's smitten,” the ghost commented.

  Ryan's eyes widened. He looked right at the ghost. “Yeah, I'm not crazy. You are,” he said.

  James’ head whipped around. “There's a ghost here? Where?"

  Ryan pointed to where the ghost was standing on the opposite side of him from James. “Right here.” The ghost waved, although he knew James couldn't see him. That wrought a nervous giggle from Ryan.

  He looked at James. “Sorry. He just waved at you."

  James took a shuddering breath. “Okay. I assume this would be the mischievous ghost?” James looked where Ryan was pointing.

  Ry
an stared over at the ghost questioningly. “What's your name?” he asked.

  The ghost took a step back and bowed with a flourish. “Percival, at your service. Eighteenth Earl of Elgin. Percy to my friends."

  Ryan repeated the name, and turned back to James. “I think he's harmless,” he said with a shrug.

  "So I take it he's not the one who pushed you,” James said, relaxing a little, but still uneasy. “Did he flip the breaker last night?"

  "Mm, yes. That was me. Admit it, you got a cuddle or two out of it,” the ghost said.

  Ryan blushed pink. “Yeah. That was him,” he said quietly.

  James raised an eyebrow. “Why did he do that, then?” he asked curiously. “I can kind of understand why the pissy one pushed you, but..."

  Ryan was getting a clearer idea of why. “I think he's like an evil, twisted little matchmaker,” he said, glaring at Percival, who giggled a little himself.

  It was James’ turn to blush. “You mean he...” He busied himself with the coffeemaker. “He's trying to get us, um, together?"

  Ryan wished that the earth would open up and swallow him whole. “I think so.” He glanced at the ghost. “But he should learn to mind his own business,” he said through gritted teeth. He looked back at James. “It doesn't mean anything. It's not like he could force you to do anything."

  "You should ask him why he is doing this, then,” he said, pouring water into the coffeemaker. “Or does he do this with all the castle's occupants?"

  "Obviously I'm doing it because I have your best interests at heart, dear boy,” the ghost said.

  Ryan whirled towards him. “Look, I don't need or want your fucking help, okay?” He turned back to James and stammered a little. “I mean, I didn't mean. Not that I have any. You know, I just ... Well, I've never had a problem before. With a guy who...” He sighed and looked back at the ghost. “Just stop it, okay?"

  James smiled. “Don't worry about it,” he assured Ryan. “I'm not upset. Just a little confused."

  "Ooh. Three guesses what he's confused about,” Percy purred.

  Ryan's head dropped forward and he covered his face with his hands. He looked up again. “Oh. How many scoops of coffee?” he asked, forgetting to pay attention to how it was made.

  "Two. One scoop per cup you want to make,” James explained. He looked up suspiciously. “What did he say now?” he demanded, frowning at the spot where the ghost supposedly was.

  "He,” Ryan wanted to die, “he was wondering what you were confused about,” he mumbled. “Just, we can just ignore him. Really. I'm totally not listening to him."

  The ghost folded his arms over his chest and pouted. “I wouldn't recommend ignoring me,” he said.

  James pushed the button to start the coffee brewing and walked over to Ryan. “Look, don't worry about it,” he said, leaning against the counter next to Ryan. “Besides, if you ask me, he's kind of a perv. He probably likes watching.” He smiled at Ryan.

  Ryan grinned sheepishly. “He said you're adorable,” he said, blushing a little still. “I guess at least he's a perv with good taste."

  James smiled more widely. “A ghost thinks I'm adorable. Well, that's a new one.” He laughed self-deprecatingly. “His opinion clearly doesn't reflect the general populace."

  "Well, then the general populace is blind,” Ryan said, glancing down.

  "I have to tell you that, regardless of how well you're doing now, you still need my help,” the ghost said.

  James smirked. “At first I was the new blood, but it's kind of a small town, and...” He trailed off. “Well, let's just say it's been a long time.” He ducked his head, embarrassed.

  The fact that James hadn't had a girlfriend in a while didn't exactly comfort him. “Yeah. For me, too,” he offered. “Not that I didn't have offers.” Things were easy in Hollywood, of course. “I doubt I'll get many here, though.” He shrugged. He smiled at James. “I'm sure in L.A. I could get you plenty of action."

  "What are you doing?” Percy asked. “Offering him women? Obviously you need my help. Desperately."

  Luckily, the coffee chose that moment to be ready, and James busied himself with grabbing two mugs and filling them. “Does the ghost want a cup?” he joked.

  "Even if he did it's too bad. I'm not speaking to him.” Ryan was getting tired of his comments. James was straight and there was nothing to be done about it. He accepted his mug and started spooning some sugar into it.

  Percy moved around behind Ryan and put his ghostly chin roughly in the vicinity of Ryan's shoulder. “He's not straight. Trust me on this one, love. He thinks he's straight, but you'll find out differently, I promise you."

  Ryan shivered a little, resolutely ignoring him.

  James sipped at his coffee, watching Ryan. “I don't suppose there's any way I can see this ghost myself,” he mused, glancing around the room.

  Percy moved over to stand on the other side of James, leaning close to his face. “No. You cannot. Pretty though you may be, I only appear to my own kind.” He looked over at Ryan. “And by that I mean Earls, not queers."

  Ryan's gaze went from Percy to James. “No. He says you can't see him. He only appears to Earls."

  "I'm not crazy about how you're interpreting,” Percy said.

  Ryan smirked. “You don't want to see him, anyway. He's rude and completely uninteresting."

  "I feel so left out,” James sighed. “Can you just tell him to stay out of the bathroom when I'm showering, then? I don't like being watched."

  Percy pouted. “Aww, tell him he's no fun at all."

  "He's says you're no fun at all,” Ryan said. “I've edited out some of the stuff he said, but that's word for word.” He doubted James wanted to hear most of what Percy said, anyway. He got the soy milk out of the fridge and poured some in his mug, stirring it. “Mostly it's how I should jump you,” he said, taking a sip of his coffee. “Which I have no plans of doing, so..."

  "Does he know what's up the other ghost's ass? So to speak,” James asked. “Why is he so angry?"

  "As far as I can tell, he's just super homophobic,” Ryan said with a shrug. Percy just snorted his assent. “And obviously all ghosts have dirty minds, because it was totally innocent.” He sighed a little and took a sip of his coffee. “Mmm, you make the best coffee."

  "But are you in danger from him?” James asked, pressing the subject a bit more.

  Percy glanced away, suddenly quiet. Ryan looked at him. “Well? Am I?” he asked.

  "Maybe, but probably not. You've got some protectors,” he said. He took a step back from them, and then another. “I believe this is where I disappear into thin air. Another time, dear boy."

  "Wait! Don't go. What do you mean, probably not? What protectors?” But then Percy was gone, and Ryan frowned. “Fucking coward,” he said with a sigh.

  James stepped closer to Ryan in concern. “What did he say?"

  "He said maybe but probably not, and that I have protectors, and then he fucking vanished.” He frowned. “What harm could a ghost do, though?” He sighed and then forced a smile. “I'm sure it's fine. What could he do?"

  James frowned. “I don't think you should be alone here, at least at night."

  Ryan smiled a little shyly. “Are you volunteering to stay over?” he asked. Sometimes, when James got all protective like this, Ryan could almost believe what Percy was saying about him not being straight.

  "Of course,” James answered immediately. “If you want me to.” He smiled. “I mean, let me know if you get sick of me."

  Ryan laughed. “Deja vu. But yeah, still not sick of you, and showing no signs of it,” he said with a smile. “Wanna go to bed? I mean, you know, to sleep."

  James yawned at the very mention of sleep. “Yeah, I guess we should. Um...” He blushed again, annoyed with himself. “Do you wanna sleep in my bed again? Just in case, you know..."

  "Are you sure you don't mind? I mean, you can sleep with me flailing all around and everything?” Ryan's heart was already poundin
g at the thought. Last night he'd been scared out of his wits when he got into James’ bed. But not now. Now it was premeditated.

  James laughed. “You didn't flail! You didn't even snore."

  "Okay. Thanks. I did feel kinda safer with someone so close by,” he said softly. He went about turning off the coffee pot and dumping out the grounds and rinsing it out for the morning. He finished off his own coffee and left the mug in the sink. Then they headed up the long curving staircase towards the bedrooms.

  James got ready for bed quickly, brushing his teeth and stripping down to his boxers. He climbed into the bed.

  Ryan took his turn in the bathroom and changed for bed. He slipped into James’ room, and slid between the covers, keeping to his own side and turning out the light. “Thanks, James,” he whispered. He really couldn't say it enough. He couldn't even imagine how things might have gone without him. Despite the coffee, Ryan drifted off to sleep quickly, exhausted from the day's events.

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  Chapter Six

  Ryan slept soundly, and when morning came he found himself wrapped around James yet again. He scolded himself and pulled away carefully, not wanting to wake him. He padded into the bathroom and started the shower, climbing in under the hot spray. He thought vaguely of James’ comment to Percy the night before about not watching him in the shower, and chuckled a little to himself.

  Ryan climbed out of the shower and dried himself off a little. He squeezed his long hair out over the tub and tied the towel around his hips before wiping off the mirror over the sink. He jumped a little when he noticed a face in the mirror behind him. “Percy,” he said, putting his hand over his chest.

  "Sorry, but I haven't been able to speak to you privately anywhere else. You're always with your little friend,” he said, smirking.

  Ryan frowned and filled the sink with warm water to shave with. “Were you watching me in the shower? James is right. You are a perv."

  Percy pursed his lips. “You haven't got anything I haven't seen before, dear boy. Although never quite so colorful, perhaps. I did know this one lovely young man with a tattoo. He was a sailor. Mm, he had very muscular arms...” The ghost looked wistful.