Love & Redemption

by Chantel Rhondeau

  Gulping down nerves, he quickly shook his head. “You know what I mean. It was too dangerous. Do you remember what happened? Why didn’t you come out?”

  “It was weird. The door was stuck, like someone locked it from the outside or something.” She sighed. “The only thing I could figure out is maybe that guy who came out of the men’s room did something to it, in the hopes of getting me to go back inside.”

  Gavin tried to remember where the stranger had gone after helping Iris outside. “I don’t remember seeing him after the explosion. You think he really did something?”

  “Maybe. Maybe it was just dumb luck. If he was the one that brought the bomb in, maybe Paul offered him extra if he could find a way to make sure I died. It’s possible.” Shelley sighed. “Do you know if they’ve figured anything out about the bombing yet?”

  He should have known she’d ask. Shelley stayed mission oriented, even when faced with catastrophe. Maybe it came from having to adjust her plans so often when people let her down. She always kept her mind on the ultimate goal.

  “I haven’t even talked to Jenessa since they pulled you from the building,” he admitted. “After I got my stitches, I went to check on Iris and made sure she was okay. I made a trip to the store, but then they called and said you had moved to a private room. I’ve been here since.”

  “Watching over me.” Another smile graced her lips.

  At least he did something right. Gavin scooted his chair closer to the head of the bed and leaned down until his face was inches from hers. “There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.” He pressed a soft kiss against her mouth and ran his fingers across the side of her face. “Don’t ever scare me like that again. I can’t take it.”

  Shelley nodded. “I promise. We’ll stick together.” She wrapped her arms around his back and strained up for another kiss.

  Gavin closed his eyes, kissing her deeply. He hoped she meant they would stick together forever. After almost losing her yesterday, he didn’t want to be without her ever again.

  ***

  A different nurse than Mary went over Shelley’s discharge papers, explaining what symptoms to watch out for and when she should return to the doctor. Gavin had disappeared for a few minutes, but returned in time to wheel her to the hospital doorway where a taxicab awaited them.

  “I checked on Iris and left my phone number,” he explained while helping her buckle up. “They still don’t know where she belongs, but they’re checking all the nearby nursing homes for missing people.”

  “That’s about all you could do. You saved her life, Gavin.” Shelley fought off a grimace as she shifted in the seat.

  Her leg ached horribly and the pain flared with the slightest movement. The doctor had explained the bruise was to the bone, which would take some time to heal. She wouldn’t be able to fight for a while, so hopefully Paul held off before his next attack. At least the doctors determined she didn’t have any internal bleeding. Shelley knew she’d been extremely lucky to come out of this with as little injury as she had.

  She took Gavin’s hand. “So, out of this whole ordeal, you got a fake wife and a fake grandma?” She grinned. “We should just start picking the people we want for family. Maybe that’s a better idea.”

  Gavin’s forehead wrinkled. “Speaking of family, I have something to tell you.”

  That didn’t sound good. “What?”

  “Your mom gave me her number before we left their house, and I promised I would keep her informed.” He grinned a bit sheepishly. “When the explosion made national news last night, I called her.”

  “Gavin! There’s a reason I keep my parents out of my life. I don’t want a relationship with them. Why did you take her number?”

  “She loves you. I couldn’t just leave.”

  Trying to ignore the guilt creeping through her gut, Shelley folded her arms together. “Yes, you could have. They didn’t want me as a part of their life for years. I don’t want them.”

  She wished that were entirely true. Still, it was none of Gavin’s business. He shouldn’t have called.

  “For what it’s worth, Janet sends her love and is glad you’re okay. I reminded her not to tell anyone who you were, so that they would stay safe.”

  While she wanted to be mad at him, he was trying to help her. She didn’t understand why he felt so strongly about this, though.

  “Gavin, I’ve been just fine without my parents since I was seven years old. They didn’t want me. I don’t want them now.”

  He pressed his lips together, and his eyes slid past her to the traffic beyond the car. His voice was soft, hesitant when he finally spoke again, “Do you really think you’ve done fine without them?”

  Of course she hadn’t. She fulfilled her Dad’s prophecy about being a slut. She went from dead-end job to dead-end job, the only thing holding her together being karate practice and shooting at the target range. Then she took up a job with a criminal, buying into his lies that she was helping people.

  “My life’s a damn mess. Is that what you want to hear?”

  His eyes locked onto hers. “Maybe making amends with your parents would be a good step to letting go of your anger, so that you can have a better life in the future.”

  “What about you?” she challenged. “How do you let go of your anger?”

  “My parents are dead.” He shrugged. “Maybe I don’t get to, but you can. I’m not saying you have to be best friends with them, but at least talk to them once in a while. You might regret it one day if you don’t.”

  She knew he was right. He’d probably love a chance to talk to his parents again, and he couldn’t. Whether they hurt her, hated her for what happened to Tony, or were just indifferent to everything about her, she at least had that chance.

  “I thought earning other peoples’ forgiveness was a part of my redemption,” she said softly. “Now you’re telling me I have to forgive, too?”

  He pried her hand from its folded position, taking it once again in his. “Maybe the only way for us to move forward is to let go of the past. I’ll try to, somehow, if you’ll promise to give Janet a chance.”

  She let herself slump against his side and rested her head on his shoulder. “You sound a lot like Carlie sometimes. I think you guys will be good friends.”

  He chuckled, laying his head against hers. “So I’ll pass the dreaded best friend test? I always hate that one more than meeting the parents.”

  “You’ll ace it. That means the only person you have to worry about is me, and I only have to worry about you.”

  “I hope I pass your tests, Shelley.” His hot lips brushed across her forehead and he cradled her against his side. “This relationship is important. I can’t fail.”

  ***

  They were both exhausted. While Shelley took a shower, Gavin flipped through the movies available on pay-per-view, trying to find something they’d both enjoy while he waited for their pizza to arrive.

  His phone rang, showing Jenessa’s number on the screen. “Hey, what’s up?”

  “Are you guys okay?” Jenessa sounded frazzled. “I went to check on Shelley, and they said she left.”

  “We’re back at the hotel. She’s supposed to take it easy today, and I’m taking care of her.” Gavin wondered if Jenessa would have any complaints about that. Technically, he was supposed to be working for Nick, not playing nurse to Shelley, but money or not, he wasn’t leaving Shelley until he was sure she was okay.

  “I’m headed back to the hotel, too,” Jenessa replied. “They gave me pain medicine for my cut and told me to rest. Ken and Dan are handling things with the New York FBI office. They’ll call if they need us. This afternoon, you guys rest and recover. There’s not much we can do until they sort out what happened with the bombing.”

  A thread of unease went through Gavin. “What about the attack on the mall? Now would be a good time for them to try something else.”

  “We’re still on high alert with doubled security, though honestly I don’t know
if that will help.” She let out a heavy sigh. “Somehow, they set a bomb in the police station for crying out loud! The diamonds are secure, though. I have them locked in the safe at the hotel.”

  “Who knows that?” Gavin hated to point it out, but there was still someone working with them they couldn’t trust.

  “Dan’s the only one besides you, since he’s the one who brought them to me.” She paused for a second before saying a bit too quickly, “He’s also going to stop by and check on me later.”

  At least they had ruled him out as a suspect for the spy, because it sounded like Jenessa had a crush on him. Love could bloom under the most stressful circumstances, though—he should know. “Well, I’m right down the hall if you need anything before he gets there.”

  “Thanks,” she replied. “Get some rest.”

  He hung up the phone just as Shelley came limping from the bathroom, rubbing a towel into her dripping hair.

  “Standing isn’t the best,” she said, “but that shower sure felt good.”

  Jumping up, he swept her into his arms and off the floor. “Let me help you with the standing part.”

  Shelley giggled as he carried her to the bed and lay her down gently, pulling the covers across her.

  “Are you hungry?” he asked.

  “A little.”

  “Good. I ordered pizza and figured we could watch a movie and relax the rest of the day. Jenessa called and said we earned some time off.”

  She nodded. “That sounds good. First, though, I need my mom’s phone number.”

  Gavin couldn’t stop his smile. She actually listened to him. That had to be a good sign—a sign their relationship was more important to Shelley than holding a grudge against her parents.

  He lifted her hand to his mouth, kissing it softly. “That’s a great idea.”

  “But then,” she continued, “you have to cuddle with me.”

  “That’s an even better plan. I never want to stop holding you, Shell.”

  “Good.” Her fingers caressed his lips. “I don’t want you to.”

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Shelley lay awake, wrapped in Gavin’s arms, listening to the sounds of early-morning risers out in the hallway. Gavin’s even breathing attested to the fact that he still slept, though from time to time his arms tightened slightly, pressing her closer to his chest. It was the kind of morning she’d often dreamed of, wrapped in the arms of a man who genuinely seemed to care for her. But could Gavin actually love her?

  Her mom’s words continued echoing through her mind, making sleep difficult. Janet wanted to have a relationship, wanted to be a family again. She was serious about grandchildren and hoping Gavin and Shelley would get busy making them. Uncertain how to tell her that Gavin wasn’t even really her husband and she didn’t even know if he wanted children, Shelley had put her mother off, saying they’d have to see what the future brought.

  At least Janet had shown a bit of backbone where Rick was concerned. When he demanded she hang up the phone and cook him food, she told him it could wait or he could microwave something. That wasn’t anything Shelley ever expected.

  Her mom had always been happy to be a traditional housewife, and automatically agreed with Rick about everything in the past. Last night marked the first time she ever put Shelley first. A relationship with Janet would be nice. Shelley just had to figure out how to forgive past hurts like Gavin had suggested.

  The thing that scared her was eventually Janet would find out the truth. How willing would her mom be to have a relationship when she found out Shelley hadn’t improved her life? Worse than that, she’d lied to her about everything. Would Janet still be so happy to have her back then?

  Sighing, Shelley caressed Gavin’s bare chest, running her fingers through the fine hairs there. She wished this dream of a life with him was actually fact, not fiction. Though it was hard to admit it even to herself, she truly cared for him. The more she learned about him and the more he stuck by her side, the more she wanted him there long term.

  “Can’t sleep, wife dear?” His deep voice startled her. “What’s the matter?”

  He even called her wife. She knew he saw it as a joke because of their lie, but she could so easily imagine it being the truth. Forcing a laugh she said, “What makes you think something’s wrong?”

  “You’ve been restless all night.” His hand stroked down her back, rubbing the muscles. “And you’re very tense. Are you in a lot of pain, or is it something else?”

  She twisted more on her belly to lie fully on his chest, propping her head up so she could look at him in the semi-darkness of the room. “The pain’s tolerable. I’ve been thinking about Mom. Feeling guilty, I suppose.”

  “Guilty? Why? You did what I asked. You checked in with her. You actually talked longer than I expected.”

  “Yes, but I—” She shook her head. “It’s nothing.”

  “I understand. You’re upset because we’re lying to her.”

  How did he know that? She’d revealed a lot more of herself to Gavin than she normally let people see without realizing it. He saw past her usual exterior gruffness to understand what bothered her.

  “It’s not a lie though, Shell.” He palmed her cheek, trailing his thumb across her mouth. “Not really.”

  Flutters of anxiety trembled through her. “It isn’t?”

  “Well, maybe the exact circumstances.” He laughed. “After all, I’m not some multimillionaire or hot shot in acquisitions.”

  “I don’t care about that, and neither does Mom. That was for Rick’s benefit.” She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “But we aren’t married and desperately in love. That’s what she cares about.”

  “Maybe not the married part,” he agreed, “but...”

  Shelley opened her eyes, meeting his. “But what?”

  “I thought I lost you when that bomb exploded. The thought of never seeing your face again, never getting to kiss you...” He blew out a heavy puff of air. “It was the worst feeling I’ve ever had.”

  “Worse than finding out Crystal cheated on you?” She didn’t want to hurt him by bringing that up, but it was something she really needed to know. Did he care about her that much already?

  “Lots worse.” There was no hesitation in his voice. “I never loved Crystal. I understand that after meeting you. What I feel for you is so different.”

  Does that mean he...loves me? He can’t possibly know that already.

  She rolled off him and scooted up the bed, putting her head on the pillow next to his. “Might be a little early to talk about love, but I’m glad you feel something for me. I’m starting to really care about you, too.”

  “The way I feel about you is more than simple caring.” He closed the space between them to kiss her lips with a whisper of touch. “I care about you more than I thought possible, more than I’ve ever cared for anyone. I didn’t expect that when we first met, but sitting by your bed in the hospital proved it to me. I love—”

  Shelley leaned into him, cutting off his words with a deep kiss. “Don’t say it,” she whispered, backing away. “There’s too much that could go wrong before we stop S.A.T.O.” Or he might change his mind. If he said it and then took it back, that would crush her.

  “Not saying the words doesn’t change the truth. Of all the places I could have hidden that day at the opera, I found you. Something drew us together. There must be a reason.” He kissed her cheek. “And I do love you, Shell.”

  The oxygen seemed to leave the room. She couldn’t catch her breath, and her entire body trembled. Though she wanted to say it back, the power of speech had left her. She could count on one hand the number of people she uttered those words to. All of them had died or abandoned her when she needed them most. Words didn’t count. Maybe they cursed.

  Gavin stroked her cheek softly with his thumb, finally shrugging one shoulder after the silence stretched out several seconds. “It’s okay. If you don’t feel the same way yet, I can wait.”

 
; There was a hint of sadness in his voice, no matter what he said about it being okay.

  Grapping his hand, she drew it to her mouth and kissed his palm. “It’s hard for me,” she managed to say. “You must know that I—”

  A loud pounding on the door broke the relative quiet of the room, causing them both to jump.

  Gavin’s eyebrows narrowed. “Expecting company?”

  She shook her head, staring at the door as anxiety trilled down her spine. “Do you think they found us?”

  The pounding repeated itself, and Gavin slipped from the bed. “Stay here,” he whispered.

  “No way.” Shelley jumped up beside him, grimacing at the jolt of pain that flared in her leg. “I’m a skilled fighter, you’re not. I’ll check the door.”

  Grabbing something off the dresser, Gavin curled his fist around it. “You’re injured.” He opened his palm, showing her the small pepper spray can. “I picked up some supplies while you were in the hospital.”

  Uncertainty tore through her as the pounding renewed. Surely Terrance and Stephen would have broken down the door by now if it was them. Besides, Gavin was right—she wasn’t in top fighting form. And if he planned to be an agent for Nick, he’d have to learn how to take care of himself.

  She nodded once, and Gavin moved to the doorway before she could change her mind.

  After he peeked out the peephole, his posture relaxed marginally. “It’s not them,” he said, “but I’m not sure we want to see who’s out there.”

  He undid the security latch and opened the door a few inches.

  “Hart?” Ken Travers sounded surprised. “What are you doing here?”

  Gavin snorted. “I could ask you the same thing.”

  “I came to get help. Let me in.”

  “That’s not a good idea,” Gavin responded.

  “Please.” The pleading in Ken’s voice didn’t seem feigned. The man was desperate. “Someone abducted my six-year-old niece and her nanny. I think it was S.A.T.O.”

  Shit. Can’t they give us one freaking day without a disaster?

  “Let him in, Gavin.” Shelley limped to the chair, grabbing the robe off it and tying it securely around her waist. “We have to help him.”