Loving Her In The Shadow- Sovereignty

by D J Parker

  His flat tongue swept my wet core. He wrapped his mouth around my throbbing clit, sucking on it.

  “Nicolai!” I moaned his name as he slid two fingers inside me.

  When he released my clit, he continued to speak huskily to my sex. “Your nose, your lips, your big brown eyes, your dark skin—it’s all beautiful. You are stunning. I see the world through your eyes in a way I’ve never seen it through mine. And for that, I’ll always be grateful.”

  He dipped his head back into my pussy and began sucking on my clit while finger fucking me until I came with his name screamed at my release.

  He damn near ripped the drawer out of the nightstand to grab a condom. After sheathing his length, he grabbed my thighs and pulled me toward the edge of the bed. He plunged deep into my cove in one thrust. A sharp gasp escaped me.

  “Reign,” he moaned between each stroke.

  “Nicolai,” I panted against his ear as he rammed into my warmth. “I need this.”

  I need you, I caught myself almost saying.

  He buried his fingers into my hair strands, fisting my hair as he fucked me with no mercy. He dropped kisses along my throat. His lips crawled up my throat, kissing my chin until he found my lips again.

  “What the fuck are you doing to me woman?” he demanded to know. His fingers dug into my thighs. “Tell me.”

  “Oh God, don’t stop!” I thrust my pussy toward his dick, meeting each stroke. “I’m about to…I’m about to…”

  An orgasm, so intense and unearthly, made all of the bones in my body contract. I shook and could no longer see Nicolai. Darkness had taken over, blinding me.

  But I could hear him. I could feel him, each thrust harder than the last until his final one. He remained inside me, chanting my name as wave after wave of his orgasm traveled throughout his body. He shuddered and collapsed on top of me.

  A few hours later when we woke up, it was midnight. We’d missed the Broadway show. But we did order the movie Aladdin On Demand as we ate our room service meals. We lay in each other’s arms like it was a natural interaction. I should’ve been scared, but I wasn’t. I allowed myself to live in the moment and welcome every feeling that charged my heart.

  Reign

  I inhaled.

  Unshed rain soaked the night air. Dark hues sprawled across the sky, the shadows of heavy clouds swaying amongst the stars. I could hear thunder growling in the distance.

  At first, it was one drop and then another, slamming across my forehead as I crossed the street. I fished around my pocket, searching for the key fob to enter my apartment building. I’d been so used to going straight to Nicolai’s place after work, it felt weird coming back to my apartment. Last week, when I stopped by to pick up some more clothes, all of my groceries had spoiled. I had to spend an additional two hours cleaning out my fridge.

  My heart began to steady as soon as I slammed the door behind me. Puffing and panting, I kicked my shoes off and tossed my keys into the bowl that sat on top of the console table in the entryway.

  I glanced at myself in the mirror above the console table, running my fingers through my feathered tresses. These days, it was easier for me to wear my hair in wash and go styles. I had to admit that part of me enjoyed the way Nicolai stared at my wild mane and stroked my curls whenever I lay in his arms.

  Nicolai.

  I missed him.

  Four days ago, he flew out to Palermo to check on his olive farms. He tried to convince me to go with him, but I couldn’t run off to another country when I was working on a few cases. He told me to stay at his place, but I took this opportunity to distance myself from everything that reminded me of him. Though these past few nights had been hard, I had to do this.

  I began stripping out of my clothes from the door and walked down the hallway to the bathroom in my bedroom.

  After showering, I returned back to my bedroom and settled into my king-sized bed with my remote in hand. The chime from my cell phone pulled my attention away from the TV. I snatched it from my bedside table and looked at the screen.

  Nic: You should be here. There’s so much that I want to show you.

  I hadn’t heard from him since he texted me and told me he landed. Although I should’ve been relieved that he hadn’t reached out, a part of me felt bothered. I’d never been a fan of being chased, but there was something about this chaser. It didn’t help that I thought about him daily or that I cried out his name late at night whenever I touched myself.

  I stared at the keypad, but then I put my phone down and asked myself, “What the hell do I want?”

  The answer was simple. Him…I wanted him.

  And it had nothing to do with love or companionship. I wanted him because he wanted me. I hadn't felt that feeling in a long time, and I didn’t realize I’d missed it until he left.

  I lifted my phone again and tapped on the message box under Nicolai’s text chain.

  Reign: Who knew sleeping without you would be this hard?

  I sent the message and waited for his response. A few minutes later, an incoming FaceTime call with his name displayed at the center came through. I tried to shrug off the nerves. My finger hovered over the green button. Calm down, Reign. Why the hell was I so nervous? I blew out a steady breath before accepting the call.

  “Reign…”

  My eyes widened at the mirrored image on the screen.

  Of all the things that can happen to me…

  There was no getting past the neon pink, silk scarf wrapped around my head. I knew tying up your hair at night was something most women did religiously, but it was something I slowly introduced into a relationship. It was under the category of washing the makeup off my face after he went to sleep or going to another room to break gas. It was a foolish practice I, unfortunately, still ascribed to. With him, I usually pulled my hair into a loose pineapple ponytail.

  “Hold on,” I said before tossing my cell phone on my pillow. I ran to the mirror, yanked off my scarf and quickly tapped tinted lip balm across my lips before jumping back onto the bed.

  “Sorry about that,” I said after I returned my cell phone to my face.

  He watched me, studying me with those penetrating eyes. What was he thinking about? Did my scarf turn him off? I kind of felt foolish for doubting myself.

  Snap out of it, I scolded inwardly, shaking off whatever had cloaked my confidence.

  “Why are you staring at me like that?” I finally asked.

  As if breaking out of some mysterious trance, he said, “Because you’re so fuckin’ beautiful, scarf on or off.”

  “Could’ve fooled me,” I mumbled. “You look so angry.”

  “Only because I haven’t slept since coming here.”

  I leaned back into my stack of pillows. “How come?”

  “Because you’re not here. I could deal with us having separate lives during the day, but at night, that time belongs to us.”

  I ran hand down the back of my neck. “I know what you mean.”

  “Do you?” he asked. The way he stared at me, face and eyes set in stone, made my insides quiver. It was deliciously intimidating. “What’s been keeping you up?”

  “You,” I admitted.

  “Do you want me to put you to sleep?”

  “You can’t do that from there.”

  He studied my face for a long moment before he responded, “I can, but that will require you to do as I say.”

  “I’m listening.”

  “I need to hear you say it.”

  “I’ll do as you say.”

  “Take off your robe.”

  I was about to question him, but then I remembered what I’d just promised.

  I sat up and grabbed the pillows behind me. I towered the pillows on top of each other before leaning my cell phone against it. Feeling sexier than I’d felt in a long time, I slid my white kimono robe off my shoulders, allowing it to halo around my bended knees.

  “Trace your fingers against your skin the way I touched you before.” He rubb
ed his jaw, brushing his fingers against the shadow of his beard.

  I slid my fingers down my neck and along my collar bones before cupping one of my breasts.

  “Your skin is a beautiful contrast against mine,” he continued in a husky voice. “Truth be told, it’s the part of you that turns me on the most.” He tipped the screen down, revealing his erection. “Your name alone gets me this way. I search for your taste in my mind, wishing like hell that your wetness was still saturating my tongue. I knew I’d give anything to touch you, even if it was only a knuckle deep stroke.”

  I released my breast and slid my hand down my stomach, stopping just above my lace-covered pussy. “Guide me. Pretend my hand is your hand.”

  “Lean back and spread them thighs.”

  I did just that, leaning my body all the way back as I spread my thighs apart. I imagined what his eyes looked like as he took in my sight.

  “Fuck,” he hissed. “I wish you could see how drenched your lips are, seeping into the lace.”

  “Do you want me to take it off?” I asked breathlessly.

  “No. Keep it on,” he commanded. “Move your thong to the side. Slide your fingers down your slit. Imagine my head between your thighs, licking you from one hole to the next.”

  I slid my fingers down my dewy slit, splitting my soaking lips as I covered the tips with my flow.

  “Dip one finger inside and let that tight pussy get used to your finger first before you dip another. Yeah baby, do it just like that. Slide those fingers in and out slowly.”

  With each stroke, I came closer to the orgasm I’d been chasing for the past few nights. My walls vibrated around my fingers. Nic groaned, cursing under his breath before breaking off in Italian.

  “Look at me,” he said through clenched teeth. “Keep your fucking eyes on me.”

  My hips rose from the mattress. I met each thrust on his command. He continued to demand more, and I continued to give my all, bucking hard against my fingers.

  “Nic,” I moaned.

  “I’m here, baby,” he said between me moaning his name. “Ride it. Ride it like it’s my dick. Ride it hard.”

  “Oh God,” I cried. “Jesus! God! Please!”

  “They can’t help you,” he growled. “This is between me and my pussy!”

  I stroked my insides faster. My other hand now rubbed my throbbing clit. A voice from the back of my mind echoed the shame I should have felt for allowing this man to own my pussy from across the world. But, there was no denying the euphoria I felt at this moment. He watched me with hunger in his eyes…hunger for me.

  “Look at what you got me doing,” he demanded, tipping his phone low. His hand was wrapped around his dick, stroking slowly. He flipped the phone back to face me, owning me in just one glance. “When I get back, I’m going to take what’s mine—every fucking part of you.”

  After hearing those words, I shattered into a million pieces, screaming out his name as I came all over my fingers. I could hear the increase in his strokes. Unlocking the freak within me, I brought my fingers close to my lips. I wrapped my mouth around each digit, lapping up my dewy finish. His jaw tightened and his breathing became heavier. I grabbed my breast and squeezed.

  “Keep your eyes on me,” I commanded, turning around so my ass faced him. I bent forward, exposing my rose-colored flesh drenched in my cream. “You say this belongs to you,” I taunted. “You claim that this is between you and your pussy. But you’re wrong.”

  I cupped my pussy, squeezing it as I began rotating my hips to a sexual melody.

  “This is between you and me,” I corrected. My pussy began to tingle, becoming aroused again. “We’re chasing this orgasm together.”

  I could feel another wave wash over my entire body just as I heard his husky grunts increase. Within seconds, I came for the second time all over my fingers. Nic was no longer grunting. He was just staring at me. After my insides calmed down, I turned around. I reached for my robe, suddenly feeling self-conscious and less like the sex goddess I felt minutes before.

  “Don’t,” he commanded in a throaty voice. “I’ve felt your body. I’ve tasted you. I’ve swallowed you. You can’t hide what I know all too well.”

  “When will you be back?”

  “I thought we weren’t keeping tabs on each other,” he replied, reminding me of my own rule.

  I looked away, slightly embarrassed. “I’m gonna get some sleep now,” I said, grabbing the phone and my pillows. “I have an early start tomorrow.”

  “Okay.”

  Should I thank him for making me cum again? What is the proper decorum? This is awkward as hell. I nervously chewed on the inside of my cheek before I finally decided to end my humiliation. “Well, goodnight.”

  “Goodnight, Reign.”

  Act III

  “Waiting hurts. Forgetting hurts. But not knowing

  Which decision to make can sometimes be the

  most painful.”

  -Paulo Coelho

  Nicolai

  This thing of ours was supposed to have been simple. Hell, I thought it would have been over by now. But as the days rolled by, it was starting to feel more like a game of Russian roulette. She was the shiny pistol and my vows to my family represented the bullet. The poor fuck with the barrel of the gun pressed against his temple was me. I knew the risks, yet I still pulled the trigger sometimes twice a day.

  Every morning, we got coffee at the coffee shop around the corner from my building. Remaining true to her word, Reign tried a different cup of coffee each day while I kept mine simple, black with no milk or sugar.

  Thanks to Reign’s assistant, Bianca, I now had access to her work calendar. It came in handy each time I decided to pop up in front of the courthouse for lunch like earlier today. We took a stroll through Central Park, eating loaded hot dogs. And, like most days, she rarely spoke about work when she was with me.

  No matter how many times I tried to convince myself that my motives for staying had changed, the truth was I didn’t need to be here. I didn’t need to be this close to her to find out what she was doing. The moles down at her office kept me informed of all of the cases touching her desk. And as much as I blamed this all on sex, it still didn’t explain why I was standing here with my sleeves rolled up to my elbows and hands buried in soapy water. Washing dishes while she dried them wasn’t a prerequisite to fuck. In fact, nothing I’d been doing over these past few weeks was necessary, but I did it anyway.

  “Come with me,” I said, silencing my thoughts.

  “You know I can’t,” she declined for the second time.

  The first time I asked her to come to Palermo with me, I was almost certain she would say yes. We’d been lying in bed, reading “In Cold Blood” by Truman Capote when I asked her in the middle of a chapter to come with me. I’d spoken about the Sicilian city where I had grown up, the house I visited a few times out of the year, and the food and wine I wanted her to try. There’d been a glimmer in her eyes, the type that was triggered by excitement. She’d stared at me and when I asked her for her answer, she’d said no.

  It was the first time in a long time I’d heard that word come from her mouth. She tore her eyes away from me and crawled off the bed. When she returned from the bathroom, she crawled back into my arms, picked up the book, found where we had left off, and started reading out loud again.

  “Carter would have a fit if I missed her birthday,” she explained as I handed her the last dish.

  “Oh yeah…” I said, pretending to remember.

  Of course, I knew about this upcoming weekend of partying. I damn near scolded myself for the emotions that stirred in my chest when it dawned on me that this was going to be the first weekend in a long time I wouldn’t be sleeping next to her.

  I couldn’t lie. The thought of men acting like vultures damn near caused me to gear up for war. Almost instinctively, a plan formulated in my mind. At first, I offered car services. But she informed me that they already arranged to have a limo for the
weekend. Next, I tried to convince her to party at my lounge, The Land. Well, she didn’t know it belonged to me and my cousin, Andriano, but it was one way to keep a close eye on her from a distance. And, to no shock, she said they’d already secured a VIP section and purchased a bottle package.

  It was at the tip of my tongue to ask her which lounge, but at that very moment, I received a call from Palermo. The Don himself wanted to discuss a business proposition in person. Rather than disrespect him, I agreed to fly out this week.

  “What if I can get you back by Thursday afternoon?”

  “I’d still have to decline,” she said, drying another dish. “My team and I have a big week ahead of us. Our key witness has agreed to turn over evidence that would, without a doubt, ensure the DA’s office probable cause to petition for an appearance before a grand jury, which will more than likely result in an indictment.

  I turned the faucet off, grabbed a paper towel to dry my hands, and leaned against the counter. Tonight, we had made my mother’s Italian sausage and portobello stuffed ravioli dish. Though it had been easy to make, getting the recipe was almost impossible. My mother knew immediately it was for a woman. She told me to bring this woman by the house for Sunday dinner. Eventually, she caved, giving me the recipe that had been passed down from one generation to the next. After making me repeat the directions for the second time, my mother asked me what was her future daughter-in-law’s name.

  I said nothing.

  By the skin of my teeth, I had escaped her probing questions. I guess I had my niece and nephew to thank for that. The sound of glass shattering in the background had prompted my mother to end the call in the middle of my usual goodbye speech. No matter how many times I’d told my mother there would be no daughter-in-law or a houseful of grandkids she had dreamed about, she would insist her norvena would be answered. Although I knew a mother’s lips were the closest thing to God’s ears, this was one prayer He wouldn’t be answering.