She need not have worried, for Mrs. Bennet, lost in her own musings, merely shrugged and said, “Oh, well then, I daresay I shall rest easier knowing Lizzy will at least be able to keep him interested until after the wedding takes place.” She gave her daughter a critical look and made a minor adjustment to the ribbon on the bodice of her gown. “Hmm…” she mused, “I do believe this neckline is particularly flattering to your bosom, Lizzy, and I must agree, the color is perfect for you. Yes, you shall wear it tonight with the emerald necklace and earrings Mr. Darcy was so generous to present to you the other day. And do not be late. I hardly think it would please your future husband to be kept waiting.” Mrs. Bennet then left Elizabeth to Georgiana’s society in order to oversee Jane’s preparations for the evening.
Elizabeth leaned against the door, closed her eyes, and expelled a long, slow breath. Georgiana looked contrite as she sat, perched upon the edge of the small sofa in the sitting room, staring at her lap in misery. Elizabeth approached her, and Georgiana reluctantly raised her eyes, now swimming with unshed tears. “Oh, Elizabeth, can you ever forgive me?” she whispered. “It was very wrong of me to have said such a thing to your mother just now. I never should have mentioned any of it at all. What you and Fitzwilliam choose to do when you are alone together—oh, no,” she gasped. “I certainly did not mean to say that! Please, please forgive me. It is none of my business, any of it, and I ought not to speak of such things. Fitzwilliam would be appalled by my lack of decorum. I can only imagine what you must think of me for speaking so.”
Frowning, Elizabeth sat beside her and gathered her hands in her own. “I believe I am more concerned at the moment with your opinion of me,” she said. “I had no idea you had reached this particular conclusion about your brother and me, Georgiana, but perhaps I should not be so surprised. We have done a rather poor job of keeping our affection for each other a secret from the rest of the world. As you well know, your aunt had much to say on the subject, and indeed, I am very sorry you were forced to bear witness to my shame. I am sure it must have been distressing for you, to say nothing of the shock of seeing your brother comforting me in such a familiar way. I am afraid that, in our distress, both of us were not entirely aware of our actions or their possible repercussions. I very much hope you will tell me if you are still troubled by what you have seen, my dear. I would never wish to be the cause of any pain or discomfort to you, nor, do I believe, would your brother.”
Georgiana averted her eyes. “I am fine, Elizabeth, truly. You need not worry yourself over me.”
“Come, Georgiana. We are to be sisters. You need not feel as though you cannot speak to me as such. I promise, you have no reason to fear that I shall pass judgment on you or your feelings, even if you believe what you are feeling may occasion me pain or discomfort.”
Georgiana fussed with the trim on her shawl. “I… very well, then. I will not pretend it did not bother me when I first figured out that you and Fitzwilliam have been… intimate with each other.”
Both ladies blushed, and Georgiana said, “Forgive me, Elizabeth. As I have said, I know very well it is none of my concern.”
Elizabeth cleared her throat and inclined her head.
They sat in companionable silence for a time before Georgiana spoke again. Though her voice was subdued, Elizabeth could sense an underlying agitation. “Elizabeth, I once knew a man who told me he loved me. He told me he wanted to marry me, but it turned out he did not. He only wanted my fortune and… and my virtue. He never wanted me. He was someone I had known and trusted my entire life, yet he used my affection for him to try to convince me to… to be with him. I did not want to, not before we were married, and he knew it, yet he continually tried to persuade me otherwise, all the while claiming to be in love with me. He said if I loved him I would… show him.” A tear ran down her cheek, and she hung her head.
Elizabeth’s eyes widened at this admission. “Georgiana, do you mean to tell me this young man has… has compromised you in some way?”
Georgiana took a shaky breath. “Yes,” she answered, “I mean no. Not entirely. It is not as bad as that.” She rose and paced the length of the room several times, reminding Elizabeth very much of Darcy. “I thought I loved him, Elizabeth! I thought I knew my own mind. I thought I knew him, but it turned out I did not. I knew nothing. I almost ruined my life and my reputation, and I brought Fitzwilliam and Richard a great deal of pain and mortification. And even though I had hurt them—even though I had disappointed them—they were both still so very kind and loving toward me, as though none of it was my fault.
“Later, my brother told me, any man who is unwilling to respect my wishes—any man who will try to talk me into an elopement, or take my virtue before we are married by the church, or make me do anything I am not comfortable with—is no gentleman. He told me a true gentleman will never demand such things from a woman he truly esteems and loves before she is ready to give them willingly, before their marriage has been sanctioned by the church. Knowing this, can you not understand why I cannot help but be troubled by Fitzwilliam’s familiarity with you?”
“Georgiana, have you spoken to your brother of your feelings?” Elizabeth asked.
Georgiana shrugged. “I have not. He did approach me the following day and on several occasions since, but I was not yet comfortable discussing my feelings about his… his indiscretions. I made up an excuse so I could leave him quickly, before he could mention it. He has since been very busy with various matters of business, and I have taken precautions so we would not be alone together. I have spent quite a bit of time wondering how my brother could ever have done this to you. I do not want you to think I believe any of the wretched things my Aunt Catherine has accused you of, not even for a moment, Elizabeth. I know you could never behave in such a disgraceful manner as she would have me believe. She is only upset that Fitzwilliam is not to marry Anne, but she was so horrible to you! You did nothing to deserve her abominable treatment. I am no longer naïve. I know very well that none of this would ever have happened, had my brother not taken advantage of your innocence and your affection for him in a moment of weakness and… and… seduced you.” Her last words were barely above a whisper.
Elizabeth inhaled sharply. “Oh, Georgiana, is that what you think?”
She nodded and looked away.
“I assure you that is not the case.” Elizabeth forced their eyes to meet and said, “This is, by no means, easy for me, but I must endeavor to correct this mistaken impression you have formed about your brother. While I will admit he may have been very…persuasive in his manner of expressing his affection for me on more than one occasion, I cannot allow you to think him capable of unscrupulously misleading me into doing something I objected to. His goodness and his moral principles would never allow such deception, such duplicity.”
Georgiana stared at her. “I know you love him, Elizabeth, and he you, but how can you say that after what he has done? What made you think you could trust him? Even though he is my brother, and the very best of men, he is still a man.”
Elizabeth smiled. “I knew enough of his character to know I could trust him. By the time we had shared our love with each other, Georgiana, your brother had long since professed his strong feelings for me many times over and had already asked me to become his wife. I would never have accepted your brother under any circumstances unless I loved him deeply.”
Georgiana lowered her eyes and said, “I do understand how easy it is, Elizabeth, to forget propriety when your feelings are so overwrought with another, but you must see how my brother has placed your reputation in jeopardy because of his unwillingness to follow his own code of honor. I can hardly believe he would consciously do such a thing—go against everything he told me—yet, I have daily proof of it before me. I feel as though he has let me down, and because of it, I will never again be able to trust another man. He has made everything worse.”
Elizabeth walked to her and said, “Do not allow one terrible experience with
one wicked man to influence your judgment of others who are truly good. There are many good men in the world, Georgiana, your brother being an excellent example. I know you are feeling inclined to lay all the blame upon him for our current unhappy situation with your aunt, but that is unfair. The truth is we are both to blame, my dear. You should realize by now, he is guilty of doing nothing more than allowing the strength of his emotions for me to cloud his better judgment. My conduct, I am ashamed to say, has been no better. He has done nothing that I did not allow purely out of the love I have for him. Please do not judge him based upon this indiscretion alone. It would do neither of you any credit.”
Georgiana was silent for a long while as she considered Elizabeth’s words. “I suppose Fitzwilliam has always been very different from George. Even when they were children, they did not always see eye to eye.” She sighed. “I know you are correct, Elizabeth. George’s motives with me have always been selfish and self-serving, while Fitzwilliam’s are born solely out of his strong love and admiration for you.” She gave Elizabeth a small smile. “Thank you for finally making me see the difference.”
“George?” Elizabeth inquired with a frown. “Is that the name of the young man you knew?”
“Yes,” she said, blushing, “George Wickham. He was the son of my father’s steward. He and Fitzwilliam were always very close when they were younger. They attended Cambridge together but did not continue their acquaintance after that. I now suspect it was because of George’s nefarious habits.”
Elizabeth paled and felt as though she would be sick. “George Wickham!” she gasped. No wonder Fitzwilliam was so affected by his presence in Hertfordshire! It is a wonder he did not kill him that day in Meryton!
Georgiana hesitated. “Do you know of him, Elizabeth?”
Elizabeth slowly nodded, too horrified to speak.
“I was at Ramsgate for the summer with my companion, Mrs. Younge, in whose character my brother and I were both deceived,” Georgiana explained. “Fitzwilliam surprised me the day before I was to leave for Gretna Green with George. He was furious and demanded I end my engagement. I could not grieve him, Elizabeth. Fitzwilliam has raised me alone since I was a little girl. It was not long until George’s true nature revealed itself to me in any case. I am truly ashamed.”
“No. You have no reason to feel ashamed, Georgiana. You were very young at the time. Mr. Wickham preyed upon your innocence and your trusting nature. You cannot be held accountable for what he tried to do. Believe me, I am well acquainted with Mr. Wickham and his… expectations of young ladies.” Georgiana was startled by the bitterness in her voice.
They spent the next half hour in earnest conversation about Mr. Wickham until it was time for them to part and dress for their evening at the theatre, each lady feeling a little easier for having confided in the other and feeling a genuine bond of sisterly friendship that would only continue to grow deeper with time.
* * *
Colonel Fitzwilliam peered into the drawing room, praying he would find his cousin alone, and slipped into the room.
Darcy, who was standing by the window, turned at the sound of the door clicking shut. He could not help but laugh at the picture his cousin presented. He found it diverting to see Colonel Richard Fitzwilliam, one of the bravest men in Her Majesty’s Army, reduced to a state of senseless fright every time he entered Darcy House. “Fear not, Fitzwilliam. The two youngest Miss Bennets have removed to Gracechurch Street for the evening. You are safe, for tonight anyway.”
“Thank God!” he exclaimed as he threw himself into a nearby chair. “How on earth did you happen to manage that feat?”
“Actually, you have Mr. Bennet to thank. It seems he has decided to take pity on you.” Darcy handed him a glass of wine as they waited for Jane, Elizabeth, and Georgiana to join them. Bingley would be meeting them at the theatre.
“Well then, I shall do so when next I see him.” They sipped their wine in companionable silence. “I understand my parents paid you a visit earlier in the week.” Darcy nodded. “I would like to offer my support to you and Miss Bennet, as well. From what I have seen of her, she is an excellent woman. I believe, Cousin, that had I met her first, second son or not, I would have been quite unwilling to relinquish such a treasure to any man, to say nothing of the likes of you.”
Darcy smiled. “Believe me, Fitzwilliam, when I say there is no other woman like Elizabeth. You can have no idea what she is to me, no idea at all. I have been completely at her mercy from nearly the very first moment of our acquaintance, yet I was too proud to acknowledge it for far too many weeks. She had absolutely no idea of my regard, which, I will admit, when I finally realized it, pained me considerably. When I now think of what I would have missed had I not declared myself and continued to stubbornly resist her beauty and her wit, it frightens me to no end. I am determined to spend every moment of my life leaving her in no doubt of my affection.”
Colonel Fitzwilliam laughed. “Yes, I noticed as much the other afternoon. I do hope you realize we are not blind, Darcy. Your affection for Miss Bennet is quite transparent to all who have had the pleasure of seeing you together. No one could ever doubt your deep attachment to her, but I assume you also realize it could very easily be misconstrued by gossips and naysayers. I hope you will restrain your eagerness for her society when we are out in company tonight. As your marriage has yet to be sanctioned by the church, I doubt very much you will wish to call attention to Miss Bennet and yourself in any way that may assist in lending credibility to Aunt Catherine’s slander. Be very careful with her, Cousin. There is far more at stake here than just Miss Bennet’s reputation.”
Chapter 18
With a scowl, Darcy promised his cousin he would be on his best behavior for the evening, but his word proved difficult to keep once he saw Elizabeth wearing her new emerald gown. He had found himself paying the modiste and her staff a personal visit earlier in the week, and it was far from sociable. Indeed, Mrs. Duval had been so apologetic and so regretful of the treatment Elizabeth had received that she had promised the completion by Thursday of at least three of the gowns Elizabeth had ordered, including the one she would wear for her wedding. They had all arrived earlier in the day with Mrs. Duval’s compliments, accompanied by two of her most trusted assistants to see to any necessary adjustments that might have had to be made. Elizabeth had spent the bulk of the afternoon closeted in her rooms with Jane and Georgiana, trying them on.
Darcy thought she looked stunning in the dark green silk creation she had chosen to wear that evening. It was elegant and tasteful while showing off her curves in a most flattering manner, making him conscious of the fact that he had not been alone with her for days. It took every ounce of restraint he possessed not to pull her into his arms and press his lips to her mouth. The emerald and diamond necklace he had given her was beautifully displayed against her creamy breasts. He swallowed hard and repressed a powerful urge to reach out his hand and caress her, to take both soft globes in his mouth and make her moan with pleasure. God, but I want her! How am I ever going to make it through this damned evening without touching her? Darcy could already tell he would fail miserably and, terrified he would soon take to acting upon his forbidden impulses, ran a shaky hand through his hair.
Darcy’s eyes bored into her with a searing heat that reached all the way to her inner depths, causing Elizabeth to flush each time she met his gaze.
Throughout the evening Darcy struggled to remain a gentleman, keeping the physical contact between Elizabeth and him to a minimum, but by the commencement of the second act, he was almost at his wits’ end. Throughout the entire first act he had not been able to tear his gaze from her at all. He had found himself mesmerized by the small smile that played across her lips and the sparkle in her eyes as she watched the actors perform on stage. He observed the steady rise and fall of her breasts as she breathed and the way her tresses bounced when she laughed. She was sitting in the corner of the box, to his right, and, deducing that very litt
le would be discerned by anyone else in their party in the darkened interior of the theatre, he slowly slid his fingertips along the contour of Elizabeth’s leg.
He felt her body tense. She closed her eyes, and Darcy repeated the action, watching her lips part and her breathing become more rapid. He felt an immediate tightening in his trousers as he observed the swell of her breast, and his own breathing increased. Impulsively, he took her hand and placed it in his lap, over his arousal. Her eyes flew open, and he began to stroke the length of her arm with agonizing slowness.
Finally, Elizabeth turned her head and met Darcy’s intense gaze. She felt a deep pull within her and an insistent throbbing between her legs, which made her long to run her fingers over his erection. It suddenly seemed far too long since she had last felt his touch, but this was not the place to act upon such desire. She swallowed hard and fought it, finally succeeding in pulling her arm from Darcy’s grasp. He seemed unwilling to relinquish her easily, giving in only after Colonel Fitzwilliam leaned forward in his seat and pointedly cleared his throat.
Against his better judgment, Darcy continued to try his hand at coercing Elizabeth throughout the remainder of the play.
Shortly before the play was to end, she had finally had more than she felt she could possibly bear, and rose from her seat under the pretense of getting some much-needed fresh air. She brushed past Bingley and Jane on her way out of the box. They hardly noticed.
Not half a minute later, she heard Darcy’s voice call to her. She was but halfway down the grand staircase and stopped to wait for him. He was carrying her new fur pelisse and gloves, as well as his own coat, gloves, and hat. When they reached the entrance, he eased the pelisse to her shoulders, and his fingertips lingered. With Darcy’s hot breath upon her neck, Elizabeth began to fasten the clasps, and a feeling of unease descended upon her. She found herself thinking of Georgiana and the conversation they had earlier in the afternoon. Her discomfort with the situation increased. Elizabeth knew that, though they appeared to be quite alone at the moment, they were still very much in public, in a crowded London theatre full of people who would be descending upon them in a matter of minutes. It was too much for her, and she found herself pulling away from him just as his lips brushed her cheek.
Truth about Mr. Darcy Page 19