Illumine Her

by Sieni A. M.

  Easier said than done, her thoughts echoed in her mind. “Alright, I’ll try,” she said quietly. She stepped out of the car and he came around to her and passed the keys to her.

  “How are you getting to the hotel?” she questioned.

  “I know my way. Now go to sleep,” he chided gently, encouraging her in the direction of the front door.

  Alana half turned and smiled shyly up at him. For all her emotional hang ups tonight, he was incredibly patient with her. “Good night, Chase,” she said softly before she turned and walked away.

  Alana had been gone a long time because the house was quiet and most of the lights were turned off. She sneaked into the living room, which was illuminated only by a warm lamp in the corner, and saw the makeshift beds on the floor. Two foam mattresses were cloaked by a large mosquito net that hung from strings attached to a wire that ran the length of the room. The couches had been pushed back to make room for the beds. Alana saw Sera sleeping and could hear her heavy breathing. Tiptoeing, she made her way to the lamp and switched it off. Too exhausted to change, she slipped under the netting. Sera was facing away from her, her body propped to her side, curls tied firmly in a bun. “To avoid the biggest ‘fro in the morning,” she had told Alana when they were roommates in university. ‘Fro or not, Alana loved her wiry curls. She eased onto the mattress and buried her face in her pillow.

  “I was wondering when Mr. Good Looking was going to bring you back.” Sera’s sleep-induced voice startled her. She turned so she was facing her friend. “Something you want to tell me?” she asked groggily with raised eyebrows.

  Alana lifted her head and propped it on her elbows. “Sorry I woke you.”

  “I was worried about you.”

  Alana smiled wearily. “You didn’t have to be. Chase just wanted to catch up.”

  At the mention of his name, Sera’s eyes widened and she seemed to have lost all sluggishness. “Yes. Chase. Funny you never mentioned him before.” She smirked.

  Alana shrugged noncommittally. “I was as surprised to see him here tonight as you were.”

  “Well, can we acknowledge that this vaycay just got a whole lot more interesting?” Alana laughed quietly. It felt good to be with her best friend again. Sera’s face turned serious. “Hey, are you okay?” she asked softly. Alana drew in a deep breath and let it out loudly. She knew what she was asking. “I know we haven’t had the chance to really talk about what happened…”

  “I’ll be okay, Sera.” Alana gave her a small smile. “Having everyone here is a welcome distraction. A healthy one. I don’t want to talk about it anymore. I just need to get over it and move on.”

  “Okay. But if you change your mind, I’m here…” Sera smiled and reached out to squeeze her shoulder. She then scrunched up her nose in Alana’s direction. “Lana, ew! You’re in the same dusty clothes you’ve worn all day. I’m not sharing a mosquito net with you if you don’t take a shower right now.”

  Alana laughed and threw a pillow at her.

  ***

  Alana rose the next morning with a grin on her face. Somehow, despite her emotional overload the night before, she felt lighter. Shuffling quietly out of the mosquito net so as not to awake Sera, she stood and stretched. Peering out at the predawn sky, she took deep, even breaths and closed her eyes. She was surprised to feel the heaviness she lugged around for weeks had now slightly eased from her chest. When she opened them again, she tiptoed to the bathroom to brush her teeth and wash her face. She groaned as she peered into the mirror seeing the mascara she left on overnight caked to her lashes and smudged under her eyes. Grabbing a damp wash cloth, she scrubbed fiercely until her skin was raw. A shower would have to wait, she decided. Today she was going to jog again. But first she had to prepare breakfast for the guests in her house. Like her, her grandparents were early risers, and she was happy to be in their company as much as possible.

  “Have you given much thought to where you want to spend that graduation present?” her grandfather asked when they were sitting around the circular kitchen table sipping tea and eating the papaya fruit salad Alana prepared. She smiled and exhaled into the teacup she was holding against her mouth. She put it down with a clink and shook her head.

  “I haven’t decided yet. It’s like entering a massive bookstore and someone tells you to pick whatever you want and you don’t have to pay a dime.” Her grandmother smiled. “It’s a lot to be given. I can never thank you both enough for this gift.”

  Sera stirred inside the mosquito net, and Alana saw her hazy form rise and stretch.

  “I. need. coffee,” she groaned.

  “It’s ready and waiting for you, Your Highness,” Alana said a little too loudly.

  “It’s too early,” Sera whined. “What are you people even doing up? The sun is still sleeping.”

  Always one to savor her beauty sleep, Sera would have to get used to what she could get in a public territory in Alana’s house.

  “So, I’m guessing you won’t be joining me for my jog then?” Alana teased.

  “Uh...sure. Not,” came the muffled reply.

  ***

  Alana laced up her sneakers and stood outside the front door. She inhaled deeply and filled her lungs with dawn’s atmosphere of fresh dew drops and heavenly gardenia. It felt great to finally stretch her muscles after their long hiatus from running. Plugging her earphones in, she shuffled through her iPod until she found the right song that fit her good mood. As the soulful voice of Colbie Caillat took over, Alana set out on an even gait. Reaching the main road, she paused to decide which direction she should go. Left would take her to the cow pasture while the right would lead her to the lookout. Pushing Chase and the previous night out of her thoughts, she turned left and paced herself, sticking close to the grassy pathway. Pulling air in and out through her mouth, she started feeling the same euphoria she got from jogging. Breathing from her stomach, she timed it evenly with the music filtering through the ear buds. She let her mind go but quickly regretted it when it lingered on Chase. Picking up the pace, she pushed herself towards the pasture, but no matter how much distance she put between herself and the lookout, the thread connecting them grew stronger. Dammit! Stay out of my head. This was her time of solitude, and she didn’t want to be distracted by a couple of warm blue eyes. She began to run, her breathing growing heavy along with the muscles in her thighs which burned ferociously. Her feet were starting to hurt and her head throbbed. It had been too long, and now every cell in her body was protesting, screaming for release. Stopping short of the pasture, Alana gasped and collapsed with her hands on her knees, lungs pumping for air. She chastised herself for pushing too hard, too soon. Her stomach churned and she felt as if she was going to throw up her breakfast. Bracing one hand over her mouth, she willed it to stay down.

  A village bus packed with people heading to town approached and beeped. The passengers glanced at her with bored expressions while she remained crumpled on the side of the road. Alana barely straightened and gave off a small smile to appear that she was okay when she was everything but. When it passed and left a plume of black exhaust smoke behind, she coughed and cursed inwardly. Colbie Caillat’s Brighter than the Sun had definitely come to an end, together with her good mood. Groaning loudly, she turned towards the direction she came from and limped the rest of the way home.

  ***

  Alana ended her shift at nine and headed over to Uncle Solo’s house. He had invited everyone to his home for dinner, which would eventually turn into a fiafia night. When she entered the front yard, she reveled in the number of people that had doubled overnight. She had always liked coming to Uncle Solo’s home with its open veranda space that connected to a large living room. A green patterned linoleum covered the floor while a similar color carried the theme up to the ceiling. Pictures of family members hung loosely on the walls, and each framed portrait had a plastic lei dangling around it. Alana made her way around the back of the house to avoid drawing attention to herself and entered one of
the bedrooms. Changing quickly out of her nurse’s uniform, she donned a yellow summer dress that fell to her ankles in a wispy fashion. She moved to the kitchen to assist her aunt and cousins.

  “Alana!” her aunt Malae greeted her. “Have you had dinner?”

  “Yes, I ate some ramen noodles at work before I came,” Alana replied.

  Her aunt shook her head, tsking at the same time. “That’s not real food. Do you want some sapasui? Fish curry?”

  “No thanks, Aunty, I’m not hungry.” Her nerves wouldn’t allow her to eat anyway with a particular man and his aura-reading ability in the next room.

  “Then come help serve the dessert.”

  Striding to and from the kitchen, handing out bowls of homemade banana cake and vanilla ice cream to the guests, Alana took in the crowd of people that occupied the living room space. Her mother and brother were there, along with her father’s many siblings and their children and grandchildren. It wasn’t difficult to pick out the guests who arrived overseas with their stark, clean clothes and fair skin, cheeks rosy from the heat. She saw Kane and immediately recognized his family from the mass of people. Turning her head, she suddenly caught sight of a familiar set of broad shoulders and brown hair. Her heart did a somersault. Whoa, calm the heck down, girl, before he reads you like a traffic light. She and Chase hadn’t seen each other since their drive and the revelation that came with it. The knowledge that he could see her aura had spooked her, and now it was just plain unnerving. And not to mention awkward. She had to learn to control her feelings around him. For tonight, she was perfectly content to steer clear from him, leaving him to entertain his friends.

  After all, she had asked him to keep his distance. It was only impartial that she fulfill her part as well. But that didn’t mean she couldn’t watch him in secret. Alana observed from across the room the way he interacted with Kane’s family, the respect he bestowed on his father, and the way it was reciprocated in equal measure. She noted that when he spoke, he naturally drew the attention of his listeners as if what he had to say was earth shattering. She wouldn’t be surprised if it was. She was aware of his abilities, which far exceeded anything she ever imagined possible. She hated that she was such a faikakala snoop, but he intrigued her in more ways than she could count.

  She sighed and shifted her attention away, walking back towards the kitchen to help clean up. She saw Sera lounging on a bar stool laughing with some of her female cousins, looking very much a part of the family. Alana neared and heard fragments of their conversation. She didn’t have to guess who they were talking about.

  “I’m going to wear something sexy to the pools tomorrow to catch his eye.” Her cousin Reena giggled.

  “Auuu, kaukalaikiki. What makes you think he wants to see those po’us on your vaes?” One cousin laughed.

  “Shut up!” Reena protested.

  “I still can’t believe a man like him exists, not to mention is in our very house,” another one gushed.

  “What kind of a name is ‘Chase’ anyway?”

  “Well, I don’t care where he got it from, as long as he feels free to chase me around all he wants.”

  As her cousins cackled away, Alana looked at Sera and rolled her eyes. She smirked back and then winked. Did he have to have this effect on every female member of her family? Granted, he was an Adonis in the flesh, but she couldn’t help but feel a little annoyed by their comments.

  She collected and stacked the dirty dishes on the side of the sink and started to wash them one by one. Sera joined her and started to rinse them, dipping the suds-covered plates into a bucket of water before piling them on the side of the counter.

  When the fiafia began, it was a spectacular show of talent and comedic performances by her uncles that entertained and impressed not only the overseas visitors but Alana herself. She marveled as Kane and Malia were called to the space that was temporarily set up for dancing. Traditional music filled the air, and her sister moved her hands and feet beautifully to the siva Samoa, a slow and graceful exhibit of poise and feminine elegance. Their male cousins and uncles were spread out around, encouraging her with their hollering and slap dancing. Malia smiled, dipping her head in the graceful way a Samoan dancer did. Alana beamed up at her sister’s radiant face, and then giggled at Kane’s attempts to imitate her cousins, the male counterpart of the dance. She was happy that Malia found her happily ever after. She deserved it after everything their family had been through. And while she could be the bossiest person to have around, Alana saw a softer side of her surface when she was with Kane. He drew out her strengths and made her laugh. Their relationship was so simple. They made it look so easy to love one another. It was as if Malia just needed someone to ground her, to bring her back to the center when she was off on her mood swings. Alana admitted she wanted that. She wanted someone who could understand her in a way that she couldn’t.

  She distinctly felt warm eyes on her setting off flutters in her stomach. Ignore him, her mind admonished. But as the fluttering intensified, her body soon betrayed her, and her eyes sought Chase out in the corner of the room. Their eyes locked—the first contact they made all night. Her smile faltered slightly, but remnants of joy remained in her eyes. She couldn’t disguise how she was feeling for her sister and family.

  This is what happy did to her.

  And for a moment Alana forgot about her father’s death. She forgot about the night at the party. She forgot about the tension and stress that had defined her life for weeks. Understanding, Chase grinned slowly back.

  So handsome, she thought then stopped. Blushing furiously, she looked away. The knowledge that he could decipher what she just felt embarrassed the heck out of her. She had to learn to tamp down on the butterflies that were taking residence in her stomach when he was in her presence. She had to learn hard and fast. When she dared a peek in his direction, he was laughing. At her! Argh! This was not good. She was going to have to up the ante. Alana scrambled around in her head for an idea. Ok, mister, get ready for some fire power, she grated. Gathering every angry emotion she could muster and conceiving every Samoan swear word her cousins had taught her, she set it off like fireworks. She didn’t know what light show she was sending into the universe, but Chase’s eyes widened slightly at her emotional retaliation. Bowing his head, he shook it, his lips curving up into a smile. Alana felt triumphant. As immature and juvenile as it was, she turned away with a smug smile on her face, feeling every bit victorious for rattling him around.

  Chapter 14

  Alana could hear the rushing water as she walked down the winding steps that led to the freshwater pools. Tropical shrub concealed their destination while trees hung low overhead and provided shade from the imposing sun. It was two days before the wedding, and most of Malia’s close girlfriends and cousins, including Kane’s old university buddies, were spending the day together at Papaseea Sliding Rocks, a hotspot for locals and tourists alike. To their luck, the place was deserted.

  Walking out onto a rocky landing, Alana peered over the edge where water flowed from a river into the deep pool below. At one point, the rock smoothed and curved downwards, providing the perfect perch for sitting and sliding over the waterfall. The drop measured about five meters, and the feeling of free falling was exhilarating. The main pool streamed and cascaded into smaller water holes further down the stream where large black rocks rose and jutted out of the flow. Alana couldn’t wait to get in and cool down. It was one of those humid, sweaty days, and she wanted to peel out of her clothes and get refreshed as soon as possible.

  “This place is amazing!” Sera exclaimed beside her.

  They stripped out of their shirts and placed them with their belongings near a bush before stepping out into the sun in their swimsuits and shorts. Alana and Sera watched as Reena walked carefully over the rapidly moving water and sat in place. Letting out a whooping sound, she pushed herself forward and allowed gravity to pull her down, sliding over the waterfall and splashing into the pool below. One of
her male cousins went next, and acting like the daredevil that he was, slipped down the slide while standing on his feet before leaping into the water at the last second. Sera gasped in surprise while Alana smiled. Show-off.

  “I’m next!” Sera walked forward and planted herself on the rock.

  She catapulted forward and shrieked gleefully all the way before the splash swallowed her voice. As Alana laughed at her enthusiasm, movement a few feet away caught her eye, and she turned in time to see Chase, Kane, and his friends arrive and step onto the landing.

  Alana drew in a sharp breath as she watched Chase stride shirtless into the sun. Dark aviators covered his eyes, and his hair was tousled as if he had just run his fingers through it. The light reflected off his broad shoulders and defined the muscles in his arms and toned abdomen. She felt the heat rise in her cheeks. Oh crap. Was this his way of paying her back? If it was, she was in deep trouble. Chase was heaven’s gift to earth, and the man needed to seriously put his shirt back on before the mosquitoes ate up that torso of his. Alana needed to get away and cool down. Literally. Stepping into the river flow, she stumbled awkwardly over to the edge of the waterfall and launched herself over without hesitation. Slipping, she careened off the main path and barreled down the bumpy rocks on the side that hadn’t been smoothed down by overuse. Spiraling out of control, she screamed from shock until she was flying in mid-air and then dropped heavily into the water below. Boom! The impact punched her stomach and squeezed her chest, the cold water stinging her skin. The pain in her bottom throbbed, but it was nothing compared to the big fat bruise to her pride. Alana closed her eyes and wanted nothing more than to stay submerged and not surface until everyone, or more specifically a certain gorgeous guy, left the premises. Her breath halted, the lack of oxygen beginning to tighten around her lungs like a noose. Only in the last millisecond when she burned for air was she forced to come up for breath.

  Reena’s high-pitched laughter was the first sound she heard when she emerged, accompanied by the snickering and cackling from her other cousins. Argh! Thanks a lot guys. Alana cursed the Samoan custom of laughing at people’s unfortunate accidents. Not that she was innocent; she knew she had her fair share of laughs at the expense of her friends and relatives when they accidentally fell or tripped over their feet, but at this very moment, she was far from amused.