Spirit

by Shauna Granger

  Spirit

  Book Five in the Elemental Series

  By

  Shauna Granger

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events or locales is entirely coincidental.

  All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without prior written permission from the author.

  Published by Shauna Granger

  Copyright © 2013 by Shauna Granger

  Cover art designed by Stephanie Mooney –

  www.stephaniemooney.blogspot.com

  For everyone who has come

  on this journey with Shayna, Jodi and Steven.

  ***

  Table of Contents

  Jabberwocky

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Epilogue

  Acknowledgements

  About the Author

  “

  Jabberwocky”

  'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves

  Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:

  All mimsy were the borogoves,

  And the mome raths outgrabe.

  'Beware the Jabberwock, my son!

  The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!

  Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun

  The frumious Bandersnatch!'

  He took his vorpal sword in hand:

  Long time the manxome foe he sought --

  So rested he by the Tumtum tree,

  And stood a while in thought.

  And, as in uffish thought he stood,

  The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,

  Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,

  And burbled as it came!

  One two! One two! And through and through

  The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!

  He left it dead, and with its head

  He went galumphing back.

  'And hast thou slain the Jabberwock?

  Come to my arms, my beamish boy!

  Oh frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!'

  He chortled in his joy.

  'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves

  Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:

  All mimsy were the borogoves,

  And the mome raths outgrabe

  -Lewis Carroll

  Chapter 1

  More than two hundred homes and two thousand square acres were destroyed in the fire. Two people were severely burned, but they survived. Amazingly, no one died. At least, that’s what the papers reported. They never found my body, and they looked for days. I know; I watched them search for me. I had always said I wanted to be cremated when I died, asking to have my ashes scattered at the roots of an old tree, but being burned alive was not what I had in mind.

  My parents held my memorial outdoors, on the beach. Search and rescue told my parents it was too soon to be completely conclusive about my whereabouts, but after seeing the site where Jodi and Steven said I’d died, my parents came to the hard decision that I was, more than likely, gone.

  A pack of surfers I had known since childhood paddled out to sea, each bearing a flower wreath. Once they were past the last break of waves, they cast the flowers into the ocean, letting the ebb and flow of Earth and sea take them. The beach was covered in black from mourners milling around, huddled against the winter bite in the breeze.

  Deb had brought her entire coven to show their respects. Little Trisity clung to Deb’s hand while tears streamed down her face, her aura a pale gray obscuring her sweet face. Deb lifted her up and held her on her hip, letting Trisity cry into her shoulder as she made her way to my parents. Half the senior class had turned out in a wash of black, white, and gray; even a few teachers were in attendance. I had no idea so many people had known me. A huge, obnoxious picture of me stood on an easel, flowers littering the ground around it. Beside it, my surfboard stood, jammed in the sand.

  Jodi and Steven received just as many hugs and whispered condolences as my parents. Their faces were dry of tears. Jodi looked hard and determined, as though an idea had taken root in her mind and she was unaware of her surroundings, whereas Steven looked distant, the fire in his eyes banked to cold embers. They accepted the hugs and nodded at the words, but otherwise they weren’t truly present. I felt Jodi’s uncontrolled magic, the sudden gusts of wind whipping her signature around, making the mourners cling to their coats and inch closer to each other.

  Jensen was there, wrapped in a black peacoat and wearing a grey beanie pulled low over his ears. His hands were jammed into his coat pockets, and his tiny mother was next to him, her arm linked through the crook of Jensen’s elbow. I traced the line of his profile with my eyes, remembering the heat of his full, red lips and the sharp lines of his cheekbones under my fingers. An ache blossomed in my chest as I waited for him to turn toward me, let me see the stormy ocean of his eyes, but he never did.

  I stood alone on the rocks, watching from a distance. I found when I came too close to those who had loved me in life, I stole what little peace they’d carved out for themselves. Any calm or happiness they had found would seep away, the color of their aura draining to gray. I was a wraith, bound to the shadows, trying to find my way home.

  I had spent my time in the Ether, somewhere between the living and the dead, hiding and running from that which would take me from this plane. I’d seen the bright Light, the tunnel, felt the inexplicable compulsion drawing me toward it. I felt the peace it offered. It felt like home. And I turned away from it.

  It was strange, watching those people, so close to them but totally apart. Even at this distance, I saw Death’s next victims. Everyone was marked for death, but the closer they came to it, the darker the mark grew over their bodies. It was a cancer that made the soul rip away from the body. I saw lung cancer creeping up on my English teacher. In another year’s time, he would know about his diminishing chances of beating it. One of Deb’s sisters stood with the shadow of Death looming over her shoulder, ready to snatch her away in a few weeks when she stepped off that curb just fifteen seconds too soon because she was digging through her purse with her phone braced between her cheek and shoulder. I was so close and yet so far away. I couldn’t warn them though the words screamed in my mind. I felt the phantom weight of my wings on my back, but I knew they weren’t there. When I died and turned away from the Light, they were ripped violently away from me.

  Thankfully, when I looked at my parents they were crystal clear, no shadow looming over them. In time, the grey of their auras would clear and resonate in the rainbow spectrum as they should. But when I looked at Jodi and Steven I saw the merest whisper of a shadow. It blurred against their gray auras, but when they moved I saw it and panic nearly strangled me. But what could I do?

  I turned to Jodi and watched her face, seeing the peaches and cream complexion drained to pale anger. My fingers twitched with the desire to wave to her, get her attention, make her see me even though I knew it was futile. Steven had turned his back on the congregation, looking out to the sea that usually terrified him, but today nothing scared him, nothing moved
him. I sighed even though I no longer breathed, and when I pulled my gaze off of the back of Steven’s head, remembering how soft the curl of his hair felt under my fingers, I looked into Jodi’s eyes.

  For one heart stopping moment, she stared right back at me.

  Her pale blue eyes didn’t blink, the line of her mouth pressed hard and angry. I started to open my mouth to call out to her, but before I could, I heard the crunch of rocks behind me, making me break our eye contact. I spun around and saw the angel terrifyingly close to me.

  “Shayna,” he whispered, his voice carried on Jodi’s wind, gusting now in frantic confusion.

  “No!” I yelled, jumping from the rocks. I took off running, faster than I ever could in life. I prayed for my wings, willed them into existence, but the pain never came and my back remained whole and unmarred. I heard the thunder clap behind me, reverberating as his wings erupted just before he took flight, chasing me.

  Fear ripped through me, threatening to trip me up. I felt the Heavens opening behind me, the warm light pressing against my back, growing warmer the closer the angel’s outstretched hand got to me. I closed my eyes and drew in the shadows of the rocks around me, turned on the spot, and let my body fall. The shadows wrapped around me and pulled me through the cosmos just as the tips of the angel’s fingers touched my sweater.

  I thought about my house, my bedroom, the pentagram chalked under the area rug, the smell of vanilla candles and cream and sugared coffee. I felt like I was caught in a cyclone of wind and power as my body spun around until I tumbled into existence again in the shadowy corner of my bedroom.

  I had discovered I could travel through shadows the first time I ran away from my guardian angel. In my terror of being ripped from this world, I had closed my eyes, dove forward out of his reach, and felt the shadows take me. They had spit me out in front of the first place I had thought of: The Oak, Ash and Thorn.

  Letting the shadows fall behind me, I stepped out of the corner into the center of my bedroom and looked around; it was exactly as I had left it only days before. My parents hadn’t touched anything. Without a body to dress, they hadn’t even needed to go through my clothes. I stood in front of my dresser with the large mirror propped up on it. I half expected to see my reflection, but only empty glass stood in front of me. I reached out to touch the pentacle necklace Deb had given me for Solstice, but my fingers went right through it, into the wood of the dresser.

  “Ugh!” I roared, my anger making the lamp on my desk flicker to life momentarily, and I felt a faint pinch of pain behind my eyes. Clenching my fists at my sides, I turned away from the empty mirror and the dresser top covered in treasures I may never touch again.

  On my desk, my grimoire lay open to the page with the notes of my mother’s fiery nightmare. I shook my head and turned away from that as well. It was just a reminder of how stupid and cavalier I had been in life. As if I had been an invincible force, undefeatable and untouchable. I mean, angels can’t die, right? Apparently they could.

  I wrapped my arms around myself, hugging myself against a chill that always creeped up on me. I had a feeling that if I hadn’t turned my back on the Light, on the reaching hand of my guardian angel, I would never feel cold again. But I had and there was nothing for it. I didn’t want to go to Heaven, or whatever waited for me at the other side of that Light. I wasn’t ready for this life to be over. I had to find a way back into the physical plane. I had to find a way to come back to life. Moving on was the natural way of things for people who were meant to die, but I wasn’t. I couldn’t have been. Jodi and Steven still needed me.

  I knew Jodi and Steven could figure out how to bring me back if only I could make contact with them to let them know I was still around. If they knew I was trying to reach out to them, get back to them, they would move mountains to help me. But so far, I had no idea how to do that. I knew spirits could move things in the physical plane, but the only way I had managed to affect anything was with extreme bursts of emotion. Every time I did that, I felt thin after, as if I was fading further away. I was a little afraid to find out what might happen if I used up enough energy to fade away completely.

  I heard keys jingling just before the lock in the front door turned. The memorial at the beach must have ended. Even from here I could hear a multitude of voices, not just my mother and father’s.

  I slipped through my bedroom door, not feeling the fibers of the wood as I did so, and stepped out into the hallway to see a pack of people crowding into the house. My parents must have arranged for the reception to take place there. My stomach flipped when I saw Jodi and Steven come through the door and stand at the hallway opening. Steven looked as handsome as ever in his slim cut black suit, black shirt, and black tie. So much black should have looked flat, but on him, it looked modern, fresh, and just oh-so-Steven. But the dark circles under his honey amber eyes belied the sleepless nights. Jodi was in just as much black. Her shoes, skirt, and cardigan were all black, and the only color she wore came from the grey blouse and matching tights. Anthony followed them, almost a mirror image of Steven; he stood a foot back, giving them space to be together in their grief.

  Jodi nodded at someone talking to her, but Steven glanced down the hallway. For a second, I thought he would see me, but when his shoulders slumped and he looked away, I knew he hadn’t. He bent his head forward and whispered something into Jodi’s ear. She nodded, and as one, they turned and melted away from the crowd and started down the hallway. For one frantic, ridiculous moment, I felt like I should hide, as if I would startle them if they saw me. But they just walked right through me before slipping quietly into my room.

  “Dude, did you feel that?” I heard Steven ask just before he closed the bedroom door.

  “What? Maybe, I don’t know,” Jodi answered vaguely. I stepped back through the door into the bedroom.

  “Like a cold spot or something.” Steven’s eyes were on the door, but Jodi wasn’t listening. She stood at my desk, staring down at my grimoire, her blond brows drawn together in a frown. They hadn’t taken my mother’s nightmares with the proper amount of warning either. We all found out we should have. Hindsight and all that bullshit.

  I moved closer to Steven, wanting to feel his natural warmth, refusing to shy away from him when he shivered and a pained look crossed his face, but just like everything else, I couldn’t feel a thing. I finally accepted that, with death, I had lost my empathetic abilities. I had nothing I knew of in life: no angelic powers, no elemental powers, no empathetic powers. I was just another sad wraith wandering the otherworld.

  “Hey, don’t do that,” Steven said, reaching around Jodi to close my grimoire with a thump. “You’re just gonna make it harder on yourself.”

  “Like that’s possible,” Jodi said in a low voice before she moved over to my bed. She fell to sit, bracing her arms on her knees, letting her head drop forward. Her short blond hair swung forward in a curtain, hiding her face. Steven turned and leaned against my desk, crossing his arms over his chest, uncharacteristically not caring about wrinkling his suit. I expected Steven to sit beside Jodi and put his arm around her shoulders, not stand away from her, letting her suffer alone.

  “Imagine how I feel,” Steven said, looking down at his shiny shoes. “I mean, I was the one in the fire. She went in there to get me.”

  “No, we went in to get you, and we were getting out.” Jodi’s voice became harder with every word. “That bastard dragged her back in.”

  “Whatever,” Steven said, stopping the argument. It sounded like they had said these words many times to each other already and both were tired of arguing about it. I watched as Steven lifted his eyes, keeping his head down. “I’m losing more power every day.”

  “I know,” Jodi said with a bob of her head, making her hair swing back and forth.

  “But I feel like I’m fading away, not just my powers.”

  “I know,” Jodi repeated. She lifted her hands, slipping her fingers into her hair and fisting them there. />
  “I felt your power at the beach.” Steven kept his eyes on the top of Jodi’s head.

  “I wasn’t controlling it,” she said robotically.

  “Your wind always does that when you’re upset, like Shay’s earthquakes,” he argued.

  “I wasn’t upset. I wasn’t anything.”

  “What?”

  “I was just there, Steven.” She finally lifted her face to look at him, letting her hands fall out of her hair. “I wasn’t upset, I wasn’t thinking about Shay.” Her voice broke on the syllable of my name. “I was just there, and it was happening. I had no power over it. It was like I was five years old again.”

  “Oh,” was all Steven had to say. I looked from one face to the other and realized something was wrong with the way they were together and it wasn’t just the shadows looming over their shoulders. It wasn’t like it used to be. They didn’t look at each other like they could share one consciousness, like they were two thirds of a whole. They looked like being together in such a close space was awkward.

  “You know, when Shay talked about the possibility of us dying if one or more of us died,” Jodi said, though she didn’t look at Steven when she spoke, “I thought she meant our hearts would stop beating.”

  “Not that we would stop living,” Steven finished for her with a slow nod.

  Jodi lifted her chin, turning her head to look at Steven. “If I could kill that man all over again, I would do it slower this time.”

  Steven didn’t respond. Technically, Steven had killed my murderer. Steven had laid his hands on the man’s face and released his Wild Fire, setting the man on fire and watching him burn, but Jodi’s Air had fueled the flames. Steven pushed away from my desk and moved over to the dresser. He was so close to me, I should have smelled campfires and roasting peppers. I didn’t.

  “I still can’t believe she kept this.” Steven picked up a hand braided bracelet he’d given me freshman year. Jodi had one just like it. Mine was faded and a little frayed after having been worn every day and night for a year, but it still held its shape and was soft to the touch.