To Follow My Heart (The Knights of Berwyck, A Quest Through Time Novel Book 3)

by Sherry Ewing

  She had been far along in her pregnancy afore she came to the decision to return home, but not to her home with her husband. Nay…this stubborn lady would not choose such a simple request as to travel back to Warkworth where she should have stayed in the first place. She all but threatened everyone within hearing she would walk to Bamburgh and the time gate by herself, if she must, in order to return to her own life several centuries forward from now, far into the future.

  There had been a moment of satisfaction when his fist made contact with Riorden’s eye that fateful day at Bamburgh. Fletcher had watched his friend run after his wife, and, of a sudden, his own feet began to move of their own accord. He knew which turret she was in, as did Riorden, and he watched from the shadows when husband and wife were reunited. Her heartfelt plea to God above for her to go home tore at his own heart, even as he listened to Riorden’s pleadings for Katherine to stay. Fletcher saw the moment in her eyes when her decision to remain at her husband’s side was determined. He had left quietly with the feeling of intruding upon one of the most intimate scenes between two people he had ever witnessed in his life. He had not been the same since.

  “Fletcher…”

  His named being called, along with a none-too-gentle shove at his armor, abruptly brought him back from the recollections that left him wishing for a life he would never have…at least with her. Remorse continued to fill his soul whilst his vision returned to the present and the haunting memories of his beloved Katherine.

  “God’s blood, you imbecile, have you not heard a word I have said?” Dristan bellowed. “What must I do for you to stop this foolery inside your head and begin to take your true place here as my captain?”

  Fletcher ran his hand through his hair in frustration. “I am trying, my lord.”

  “Bah! If this is trying, then you must needs put more effort into it. I will not have my captain display any weakness in front of the men. Now, are you ready to have another go at it in the lists, or shall I appoint another to replace you and lead my knights?”

  “You would choose another over me?” Fletcher said aghast. He really must appear a fool if Dristan was threatening him with such an ultimatum.

  “You know, I must needs think of what is best for Berwyck,” Dristan declared putting his helmet back on his head. “If that means finding another to take your place, then so be it.”

  “’Twill not be necessary,” Fletcher said shortly and stood, firm in his resolve to prove his worth. “I will not give you cause to doubt my loyalty, nor my oath I made to protect Berwyck and its people.”

  “I have never doubted your loyalty, Fletcher, only your good judgment in languishing away for a woman who will never be yours. Prove your worth and get your head back into what is important―your duty,” Dristan said firmly. “The rest will fall into place, as it will.”

  “As you command, my lord,” Fletcher answered with a bow of his head, accepting the well-deserved admonishment from his liege lord.

  Dristan rose and began to make his way back to the lists afore he looked back over his shoulder. “Well…are you coming? There is plenty of daylight still and much training to be seen to, as yet.”

  With a heavy sigh, Fletcher put the chain mail coif back upon his head, along with his helmet, and followed close behind his liege lord to begin the exercises again. His sword flashed a brilliant blue-green from the sunlight as it left the sheath at his side. He could have sworn the light reminded him, somehow, of Katherine’s sparkling eyes.

  Chapter 3

  Jenna walked the distance to her car in the parking garage, which was dimly lit, and she kept a careful eye out while her clicking heels echoed each time they met the pavement. Pressing the button for the trunk, the sound of the horn beeping reverberated eerily. After putting Dylan’s briefcase into the trunk, she slammed the lid shut. She gasped when she saw Dylan standing at the driver side door with a disgruntled look on his face. His blondish-brown hair stood on end as if he had just taken off a baseball cap, but it was the hostility in his blue eyes that warned her he was about to explode.

  “Where the hell is my briefcase?” his nostrils flared, proving her correct in her assessment of his mood.

  “Really?” Jenna snapped, putting her hands on her hips. “I don’t see you for three friggin’ days, and you have the nerve to only ask where your damn briefcase is?”

  “How are you?” he replied, clearly making an effort to calm himself down. He looked her up and down, apparently taking note of her clothing. “You look good, by the way. I haven’t seen you dressed up in ages.”

  Jenna fingered her grandmother’s string of pearls she wore around her neck. “I’m not sure that’s much better,” Jenna fumed. Then she fumbled with her keys, “but that’s probably the best you can do under the circumstances, isn’t it?”

  “What do you expect me to say, Jenna? This wasn’t working out, so I left. I figured it was easier that way than to watch you balling your eyes out.”

  “So, just like that, you up and leave without a word? After all the time we’ve been together, you just toss me to the curb like yesterday’s trash? You didn’t even have the balls to confront me with the problems we were having in our relationship like any normal person,” she yelled.

  “This is exactly why I left as I did. I didn’t want to stay around and listen to you make a scene or try to convince me to stay. Think of this as me doing you a favor. You’ll thank me one day. You’ll see.”

  A nervous laugh escaped her as the reality of his words hit her with all the force of being slammed by a moving vehicle. Suddenly, she realized she had nothing more to say to him. She hit the button for the trunk again then reached inside to pull out his briefcase. With a sad sense of finality, she handed it to him.

  “Thanks. I’ll see ya around,” Dylan smirked, and, with a wave of his hand, he was gone.

  No goodbye, no turning around for one last look, no nothing. He just strode away and left, as though they had never meant anything to each other. Jenna wasn’t sure how long she stood there, staring into nothingness, before the urge to cry finally hit her. She couldn’t breakdown here when others from work would be leaving soon. She didn’t want anyone to see her major meltdown she knew was about to overwhelm her. There was only one place she wanted to be at a time like this that would offer whatever form of comfort she would need to get her head on straight.

  She got into her car and started the ignition. After pulling out of the parking space, she did everything she could to maintain a proper speed and not have the tires squeal in protest while she made her way out of the dark structure and into the bright sunlight. Traffic was always horrendous in the city, so there was no sense in trying to hurry anywhere at this time of day. Between the cars and the pedestrian’s, she could only go so fast.

  Turning on the radio, she quickly tried to find some tune that would not remind her of Dylan. Why did it seem only sad love songs were on the radio when what she truly needed was some mind-numbing rock and roll? Stopping at a red light, she reached for her phone, grabbed the power cord already attached to the car, and connected it. Since the light was still red, she had time to find some music that would do just the trick before setting her phone down in the cup holder of the console between the front seats.

  Slowly, she increased the volume to suit her mood, and then she sang out the lyrics just to stop the sudden urge to weep. She headed west, wishing there were a faster way to reach the ocean. She couldn’t get there soon enough and was glad to at last see the parking area above the Cliff House.

  Finding an empty space, she pulled in, turned off the car, and just sat there taking in the vast, majestic view before her―a sight she had seen many times before. The sun was still high in the sky as it glistened on the ocean far below. Even the fog stayed away, but Jenna could see it would only be a matter of time before it rolled inland to blanket the shoreline.

  As she got out of the car, she grabbed her coat and purse then locked the door and began making her way down
the hill. She paused only once to look out over the now bare area to her right that once housed Sutro Baths. From the vintage photographs she’d seen, the baths had been such a wonderful looking structure. She returned her attention in front of her and could almost envision the eight-story Victorian chateau built by Adolph Sutro in 1896. It may have survived the earthquake of 1906 that had destroyed most of San Francisco, yet it wouldn’t survive a fire one year later that would level it to a pile of burning ash in a matter of less than two hours. They would continue to rebuild the place, even though it would only be one of many fires to consume the restaurant over the years. Still…the chateau had been magnificent, and Jenna would have loved to see that one rebuilt, no matter how unlikely that would happen.

  Now was no different than times of old, for the Cliff House was a place where tourists flocked to. As if to prove her point inside her head, Jenna watched a busload of tourists disembark to noisily speak in various languages. Cameras were pulled out while flashes began going off, and Jenna scooted around the multitude of people trying to get the perfect shot then she made her way to the back of the building. She took flight down the stairs until she reached the ledge overlooking Seal Rocks and paused to take in the glory of God’s work.

  It was beautiful here and had always been one of her favorite places she seemed to seek out whenever life threw her curve balls to challenge her. They say the trials in your life were to make you stronger. God must surely think she was made of stern stuff, since He seemed to continue to push her to the very limit of her sanity.

  “I knew I’d find you here. I forgot to ask you to return the ring.”

  Dylan’s jarring words caused Jenna to reach the breaking point in her determination to remain strong. Looking up, she was surprised to see a young girl clutching Dylan’s arm. Was she even eighteen, Jenna thought, as she gave her rival the once over. She was as different to Jenna as the day was to night. Long straight blonde hair hung down to her waist, but it was the smug look shining in the girl’s dark brown eyes that made Jenna realize Dylan had been having an affair on her. It explained so much. Everything about what was wrong with their relationship suddenly fell into place.

  “I see you didn’t waste any time, did you Dylan?” Jenna declared as she fingered the ring still on her hand he had so lovingly placed there over a year ago.

  “Don’t make a scene, Jenna. It’s beneath you, and Clara doesn’t deserve it.”

  Jenna swore beneath her breath. She wouldn’t reach down to their level, no matter how much he was hurting her. “I wouldn’t waste my time, honey. You’re right…you have done me a favor.”

  “Just hand over the ring, Jenna, and we’ll be on our way,” Dylan demanded, thrusting his open palm toward her.

  He stood there waiting for her to give the token of his affection over to him. Jenna had just started to give in to his request when the girl spoke up.

  “It’s going to be mine now, and we’re going to get married this summer,” Clara chimed in with a bright smile on her face.

  How could this girl have known that would have been the wrong thing to say? “Is she even old enough to marry, or did you have to ask her parent’s permission, since she can hardly be out of high school?”

  “Just give me the ring so we can get out of here, will you? I can’t stand the sight of you anymore. Not even for another minute,” Dylan ordered with cold eyes.

  Perhaps, if she had seen his face soften into some semblance of regret, she would have done things differently. But there was nothing showing in his demeanor that even resembled the slightest bit of the man she had fallen in love with.

  She pulled the ring off and watched as the diamond winked at her in the fading sunset. She held it in front of the girl almost tempting her to take it from her fingers. “You mean this itty-bitty ole thing?” Jenna inquired sweetly, holding it even higher until she pulled her arm back in a wide arc, and then she released it to go sailing into the ocean with enough force to reach clear to Japan.

  Dylan’s cry of regret rang out even as Clara began to cry. “Damn you to hell, Jenna!” he yelled with fury blazing in his eyes.

  Jenna began taking off her heels, wishing, not for the first time today, for her comfortable sneakers. “If I’m going to hell, I’m sure you’ll be there to greet me, someday,” she jeered. She began making her way from the couple. She stopped suddenly, and turned back to see Clara flipping her off. “By the way, dear, once a cheater, always a cheater. Don’t be surprised if you find yourself in my exact same position one day.”

  She didn’t wait for a reply. None was really needed. Instead, she ran barefooted down the sidewalk, past the lingering tourists, until she came to an opening in the retaining wall where she slipped through, because she just needed to walk along Ocean Beach for a while. This place was a constant in her life, and she took comfort from the tiny granules of sand that squished beneath her toes and feet. Her walk would soothe her troubled soul, even while she wished to find someone, someday, who would love her for just being herself.

  Chapter 4

  Fletcher rose from his bed and went to put kindling on the fire to take the coolness from the chamber. He grabbed at a fur pelt he had left on a nearby chair and wrapped it around his shoulders whilst he sat next to the revived flames. Bright red, orange, and even the shade of cobalt blue could be found in the blaze’s deepest depth. The more he gazed into the hearth the more foul his mood became. ’Twas not a good omen to start the day.

  He supposed he could have called for a lad to help him don his clothing, but he wanted to be alone with his own thoughts. Perchance brewing upon them was not the best course of action, but he could think of no other alternative. Mayhap, some fresh air would do him some good afore he went to break his fast in the great hall.

  Inattentively, he quickly dressed, left his room, and began making his way up the turret to the upper battlements of the keep, ascending the steps of the parapet only to find another had already found her place upon the narrow walkway. He should not have been surprised to espy the lady of the keep in such a precarious placement. Amiria of Berwyck tended to live her life on the edge of danger, or so it always seemed to Fletcher.

  Upon arriving at the top of the stairs, he gave her a formal bow, not knowing if she too desired privacy this morn. “My lady,” Fletcher spoke, watching her nod in return. Her long red hair swayed in the breeze blowing in from the ocean far below the cliff upon which the castle was perched. She was dressed as she always preferred, in hose, tunic, and boots. A sword was strapped to her side, much like that of her husband. They were a fine pair, the two of them, and they complemented one another as only two souls who had found their match could.

  “Come, join me, Fletcher, and watch the sun rise. ’Twill be a glorious day, do you not think?” Amiria whispered, urging him to meet her at the wall.

  They stood in silence, side by side, watching whilst the sun began to caress the horizon in a stunning display of color. Fletcher’s gaze remained unfocused as he relived memories better left in the past. A shallow sigh from the lady by his side had him finally turn to give her his full and undivided attention.

  “You were far away, my friend. I can only imagine where the past has taken you,” Amiria murmured softly and reached out her hand to place it upon his forearm. “You miss her?”

  “I did not realize you had the gift of sight like your healer, Kenna,” he murmured with his head cocked to assess what only she knew for certain.

  “I do not need such a gift to see for myself the obvious. But I had to ask. Do you miss her?” Amiria repeated.

  “Aye…against my better judgment. I cannot seem to help myself from thinking of her, no matter whatever task is put afore me of late,” Fletcher confessed. “It does me no good to brood on her, but my mind seems to constantly conjure her face.”

  “I am most sorry, Fletcher, but you knew the risk you took when you spent so much time with her whilst she was here at Berwyck. She was pregnant with his child. You knew at some poin
t Riorden would come for her or for his heir, if nothing else. And, you knew of their connection, and what had occurred in order for them to be together. How should it be so difficult to accept Katherine would choose him over any other?”

  “You impart no words of wisdom that have not already crossed my mind, my lady. Do you, mayhap, have something else that could cheer me?”

  Amiria gave a bright laugh and put her hand upon the hilt of her sword. “We could have a go at in the lists, if you care to test your arm against a woman. Are you up to the challenge?”

  Fletcher joined in her laughter. “I fear, I might be humiliated beyond redemption, but perchance ’twill do me some good to be so humbled. Shall we meet after we break our fast?”

  She smiled brightly at him. “I must needs attend the children first, but I will see you shortly. Will you come down now, Fletcher? There is no sense to stay up here by yourself.”

  “I will be there shortly.”

  “As you wish,” she replied and began to take her leave of him. “Do not be long, or I will send up Dristan to drag you to the hall by your ear if I must!”

  “You would not dare, my lady.” Fletcher responded but saw the sparkle in her teasing violet eyes.

  “Then do not test my patience at being kept waiting, Sir Knight.”

  He gave her another bow and watched her ’til she left him standing with only a few guards, who remained vigilant at their posts. He returned his attention back to the ocean and waited for the peacefulness to give him the strength he stood in need of. The more he waited, the more he had the distinct feeling, yet again, he was not alone.

  Fletcher noticed something out of place from the corner of his eye, causing him to turn. ’Twas at first but a distortion of the landscape surrounding him, but then it began to take shape. The figure appeared as but a vaguely transparent ghostly form, ’til said form filled in, as if in truth, the knight were alive and standing right afore him. ’Twas so reminiscent of all the other times they had done so in the past, Fletcher at once realized how much he had missed this man’s banter.