Alex

by Monica Robinson

  "I should have figured something wouldn't go right.” She examined the splotch and groaned. “I don't think anyone will have to worry about me giving them food poisoning. I'll have killed myself long before then. Between the broken glass from the pancakes and the grease from the bacon, I have a good start going."

  "You really don't have any confidence in yourself, do you?” Alex pouted and he shook his head in frustration. “I'm serious. Nobody expects you to know what to do the first couple of days. Besides, I still burn myself. It happens."

  He finished with the bacon and returned to the sink to look at the mark on her hand. Already, her skin was beginning to fester. He opened the cabinet above the sink and retrieved the burn cream.

  "You're right."

  "About?"

  He shut off the water and waited for her to pat dry the burn area. Once finished, she stuck out her hand for him to doctor. She sucked in a breath between clenched teeth when he applied the cream.

  "I don't have much confidence in myself. I'm out of my element here and since I'm a perfectionist, nothing I do is good enough for me let alone for all of you."

  Her statement explained quite a bit. It explained why she insisted on being so hard on herself and why she reacted to her mistakes with such reproach. Each mishap crushed her ego more and only served to fuel her determination to get things right.

  "In case you haven't noticed, none of us are perfect.” He lowered his voice, “If we were, do you think we'd be here?” She refused to look at him and he dipped his head, forcing her to look at him. She chuckled when he lifted an expectant eyebrow.

  "No,” she admitted. “I suppose you wouldn't.” Her eyes finally lifted and she glanced at her hand still in his.

  He expected her to withdraw, but she didn't. Her fingers were like electric charges, jolting his nerve endings with awareness. An urge to kiss her swept over him. It was insane and he knew it, but he wanted to put his arms around her and kiss away her insecurities. He couldn't do this though. Not only would she be furious, but she was Jason's niece as well. Jason had taken a chance on him and he would be betraying his trust. Brett couldn't allow that to happen. Ever.

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  Chapter Eight

  Alex spent much of the next two hours in a daze. The burn on her hand throbbed, but the pain was minimal compared to the constant buzzing in her brain. She could have sworn Brett was going to kiss her. He'd been so close and she thought she saw the urge reflecting in his silvery eyes. He didn't though. Instead, he moved, stating that he would help make the eggs.

  It was silly to think he would actually do something like that. He barely tolerated her, so why would he kiss her? Even if he wanted to, he's probably afraid I'll hit him. Well, wouldn't she? The answer startled her. She wouldn't. In fact, a small part of her had hoped he would lean forward the extra two inches.

  Deciding to put the awkward moment behind her, she surveyed the kitchen for any dirty dishes. Finding none, she shut off the water and carefully dried her hands on the towel. She started for the living room and spotted Matt and Daniel entering through the front door. She was about to ask them if they needed anything, when she glanced at the phone from the corners of her eyes. A scowl started to form at the memory of her conversation with Greg, when an idea struck her.

  Brett had told her that she would learn the workings of the ranch with time. He was undoubtedly right, but what was to keep her from trying to remedy her mistakes with what she knew?

  The ranch house was an interior designer's worst nightmare, so why not spruce it up with a few decorations? She knew enough about style to turn the drab furnishings and outdated colors into something fashionable. All she needed was to secure the funds for her project.

  "Daddy can't say no to this,” she muttered and lifted the receiver. “I'm helping Uncle Jason."

  Now whether her uncle appreciated her efforts or not remained a mystery. He didn't strike her as the type to care for frivolities and as she dialed her home phone number, she made a mental note not to overdo it.

  "Franklin Kincaid."

  Alex wrapped the phone cord around her index finger and plunked into a seat at the table. She narrowed her eyes to examine it. The surface was in excellent physical condition with few scratches, but the finish had begun to fade.

  This shouldn't be too hard to fix. “Hi, Daddy. I know you're probably getting ready for work, so I won't keep you long."

  Her father's tone brightened. “Well, hello Alex. Aren't you up early? It can't be any later than seven o'clock where you are."

  Funny. She'd been awake since four that morning and though she was tired, the prospect of doing something useful for the ranch energized her.

  "I've been up for a while.” Deciding to get to the point, she said, “I was wondering if you could lift the freeze on my checking account. I want to get a few things for Uncle Jason's house and I would rather not use my credit card."

  Her father was silent for a moment.

  "Why doesn't your uncle purchase the items himself?"

  Because Uncle Jason would rather gouge out his eyes than buy throw pillows and curtains. She really couldn't blame him. The money the ranch earned needed to be dispersed in more practical ways—such as feed for the animals, food for the house and pay for the boys.

  Wow, she thought of her revelation. That's a new one.

  "I don't want Uncle Jason paying for it. He has more important things to spend money on. What am I going to do with mine? Buy new clothes that I don't need?"

  Sadly, this was exactly what she would end up doing. She didn't pay for anything at home. When she'd had her license, her father paid for her car and the insurance, despite the fact having her on his policy tripled his payments.

  "How about paying your fine?” he asked with heavy sarcasm. “I paid the state, but you could pay me back. That would be more constructive than hiring an interior designer to work on your uncle's house. Did you even ask him if it was all right to do this? It's his house, after all. You can't just walk in and start changing things because you don't like it."

  What was this? Here she was trying to make things better and her father was berating her.

  "No, I haven't asked yet, because I wanted it to be a surprise. And for your information, I wasn't going to ‘hire’ anyone. I want to do the work myself, since I'm the one who inadvertently stripped the finish off Uncle Jason's floor yesterday."

  Matt and Daniel stood just outside the kitchen entryway. She could see the confusion on their faces, but rather than try to explain, she held up a finger to signal them to wait. “On second thought,” she continued, “never mind. I'll use my credit card and when the bill arrives, you can send it to me. Uncle Jason pays us, so I'll use my wages to pay for everything.” If this was how he wanted it, then fine by her.

  "Now hang on just one minute, young lady,” her father snapped. “There is no need for you to be rude. All I was suggesting is that you take care of your responsibilities before you start spending indiscriminately."

  Frustrated, Alex closed her eyes. “The house is my responsibility. However, take what I owe you and give the rest to Mindy. Morgan already has Greg, so she doesn't need my money as well."

  "Alexandra, do not hold your indiscretions against your sister. You wouldn't be out there if you hadn't acted so irresponsibly.” Her father was livid but she couldn't find it within herself to care. “To accuse Greg of cheating on you is a very selfish thing to do. Especially when the boy came to me last night asking for time off to see you."

  How could he accuse her of being selfish? If anything, Greg was the selfish party.

  "I'm glad I'm out here,” she whispered. “At least the people here are genuine. They mean what they say and they stick together like a family."

  They were a family. Each of her uncle's workers would do anything for him and for each other. They all shared in the success of the Bar K and her uncle was at the heart of this camaraderie. He was their employer, their friend and in Danie
l's and Matt's case, their savior.

  "What is that supposed to mean?"

  She'd offended him. Good. It's about time someone stood up to him. With the exception of her mother, no one had ever challenged her father.

  "It means you can keep your trust fund, Daddy. I have other reasons for being here and your money no longer interests me.” What was she saying? Without that trust fund, she was penniless. She was turning away from five million dollars.

  I am out of my cotton-picking mind.

  "What are your reasons now?"

  She didn't miss a beat. “I want my life back. I've wasted the first twenty-two years letting people tell me what to do and I want to know what it's like to have someone believe in me. I want to know what it's like to have someone count on me. I'll screw up from time to time, but I'll figure it out ... alone if I have to."

  Perhaps the most gratifying part was that she meant every word. It had taken hearing her father's lack of confidence in her to come to this decision, but now that her determination was in place, she wasn't going to quit.

  "Alex,” Franklin groaned, “you misunderstood my meaning. I do believe in you. I want you to believe in yourself, that's why I sent you to your uncle's."

  "No you don't, but that's all right. There are people here who are willing to help.” She thought of Brett. “I'm going to prove to you and to everyone else that I can do it. Don't bother giving Greg the time off. I called the engagement off last night and I would just as soon not see him until I have to."

  "Why in God's name would you do something that irrational? Greg is good for you."

  Was he serious? After everything that had occurred, how could anyone think Greg was good for her?

  "No, he isn't,” she murmured. “I take blame for drinking and driving, but he's the reason I drove in the first place. You were right about one thing. I need to grow up.” She glanced up to see Matt and Daniel still standing in the doorway, their looks of confusion replaced with deep frowns of disapproval.

  "Darling, you're taking my comments completely out of context.” His patronizing tone grated on her strained nerves and she felt her lips curl into a sneer. “You're bitter about what's happened and in many ways, I don't blame you. However, there's no need to take it out on your fiancé."

  She rose and slid past Daniel, her jaw trembling with anger. This was too much. It was apparent nothing she said would make a difference to her father and she'd had enough.

  "Ex-fiancé,” she growled. “Look, I'm sorry I even called. If you would be kind enough to leave me my credit card, I'll take care of Uncle Jason's house myself and you can send me the bill. Otherwise, do what you will with my bank account.” Without giving her father the chance to reply, she slammed the receiver onto the hook.

  She ran her fingers through her short hair and gripped the silken tendrils in her trembling fists.

  "Are you all right?"

  She released her hair and huffed before letting her hands fall to her sides with a quiet plop. “No.” She glanced out the window. “Does Uncle Jason permit smoking on the grounds?"

  Matt nodded and reached into his shirt pocket to remove a pack of cigarettes. “We have to go outside, but maybe the fresh air will help cool you off."

  She took one of the cigarettes and thanked him. “Nothing short of a miracle will do that,” she grumbled and entered the living room. “However, you two are more than welcome to listen to me rant and rave like a madwoman."

  What was wrong with the people back home? The instant she mentioned wanting to do something with her life, everyone started treating her as though she were a temperamental child. Shouldn't they be supporting her instead of making her feel worse?

  "If that's what will make you feel better,” Daniel remarked while following her onto the front porch.

  That was just it. Hollering, yelling and screaming might relieve her momentary irritation, but it wouldn't pacify the deep-seated anger she felt toward her father, Greg and even Morgan.

  She leaned against the rail and took the lighter Matt was holding out to her. “Here's the thing,” she began after lighting the cigarette. “I was trying to figure out a way to make up for yesterday's disasters and I came up with the idea of redecorating the house. I may not have the sense God gave a cricket to separate clothes, but I know my way around a color palette."

  Matt slipped the lighter back into his pocket and crossed one foot over the opposite ankle. “If it makes you feel better, I turned an entire load of laundry gray once when I tossed in a black t-shirt. So, in actuality the pink britches really weren't a big deal."

  Alex laughed. “Thanks.” She exhaled a lungful of smoke and made slashing motions with her hands. “Anyway, I want to pay for the materials and do the work myself, but my father put a stop on my bank account before I came out here. So I called to see if he would lift the hold on my assets.

  "Well, he went on this tirade about how I need to pay him back for the fine I received for my OUI. I have no problem doing that. Really I don't, but he made it seem as though the only thing I care about is shopping."

  Matt chewed the inside of his lower lip and slid Daniel a sidelong glance before returning his attention to her. “What did you tell him?"

  Alex stared at the floorboards. “I told him to take what he wanted from my account and give the rest to my little sister. I then told him that my twin didn't need the money since she'd already taken it upon herself to help herself to my ex-fiancé."

  "You mean there are two of you?” Daniel asked in mock astonishment. “God help the state of Maine."

  She elbowed him in the arm. “That's not funny.” She pointed at him. “If you think I'm spoiled, you should see her. She had a maid fired once for not remembering to draw her bath at exactly ten o'clock."

  Matt pressed his lips together in a tight smile. “I'm not going to comment on that,” he murmured. “Are you sure this guy is cheating on you with your sister?"

  She wouldn't put it past her sister to do something that sneaky and underhanded, but she wasn't sure. Not that it mattered. The fact that Greg had taken Morgan to Benjamin's was only a small part of her reason for breaking off the engagement.

  "I can't be certain, but I called Greg last night to get a little sympathy out of him and he was out partying. I didn't expect him to wait the six months before going out, but give me a break. I haven't even been gone two days. I asked him who he was with and he admitted being out with Morgan. I didn't need to hear any more after that."

  "Sounds like you're better off without him,” Daniel said with a scowl. “In a way, you're here because of him and from what you've described, he doesn't seem like he's the least bit affected by it. What did your father say when you told him you broke things off?"

  Alex's eyebrows tilted in a frown. “He said I was being irrational and that Greg is good for me.” She laughed at the irony. “I wonder how he would react if he knew his pet protégé has a habit of snorting cocaine every weekend. Regardless, I told him to keep his money and that I would pay for the materials myself."

  Matt flicked the excess ashes from his cigarette and eyed her wearily. “Did you share in this weekend habit?"

  No and she was glad. After hearing Steven's story and seeing what drugs did to Greg, she wanted nothing to do with it.

  "No, I've always stayed far away from drugs. Don't get me wrong, I don't think any less of Steve or Brett for having taken them, but the idea just never appealed to me.” She took a deep breath. “What bothers me is the fact Greg said that if I hung up on him—which I did, by the way—he would come out here. Now, I find out he actually asked my father for the time off to do so."

  The tiny lines around Matt's eyes twitched. “You don't want to see him?"

  She shook her head.

  "Then he won't get near you."

  What could they do? There was a possibility that if Greg showed up at the Bar K, he wouldn't be sober and the last thing she wanted was for the boys to get involved in her domestic drama.

 
"That's sweet of you, but I'm not going to be the source of any trouble for you all."

  Daniel exchanged glances with Matt before taking one final drag from his cigarette and dropping it into a metal can next to the steps. “What trouble? All we're saying is if you don't want to see him, the rest of us will ensure that you don't have to.” Then to Matt, “We should probably get back to see if Charlie needs any help with Bella. She didn't look too good yesterday."

  Alex darted a glance to the field where the horses were roaming in the warm morning air.

  "What's wrong with Bella? Is she all right?"

  Daniel shrugged. “You're asking the wrong guy. Charlie's been with Bella ever since she was a filly, so he knows more about her than the rest of us.” He bounded down the porch steps and paused. “Jason mentioned something about going into town today, so if you want to look into redecorating the house, you should see about tagging along with him."

  Alex nodded. “I will, but do you think Charlie will mind if I come with you to check on Bella?"

  A gentle smile touched Matt's lips as he tossed the still burning cigarette into the can and hopped the railing of the porch.

  "I'm sure he won't. I think the old girl could stand to have a bit of extra female company,” he said with a wink. “Even if it is with a human."

  Alex ground out her cigarette and followed the two hands to the gate leading to the grazing field. As she walked across the dampened grass, she let her eyes travel over each of the horses. None of the animals seemed to pay the intruders any mind other than to twitch their ears in the direction of the rustling grass.

  "They sure are tame."

  Daniel nodded while gazing at the horses in appreciation. “There's nothing for them to be afraid of. They know who we are and that we're not going to hurt them. A few of them are a bit skittish, but that comes from being young,” he said as they reached Charlie and the pregnant mare. “How's she doing?"

  Charlie glanced up from stroking the horse's nose and shook his head. “I think she's going to deliver tonight. She's been a bit restless, but with everyone around she's going to wait until she's alone."