by E. F. Jacks
Pauline’s gaze stills on the arrow. She whimpers, and tears gurgle in her throat. A stream of questions flow from her mouth. “Where did that come from? Why is this happening to us? Who’s doing this?”
We aren’t alone. I duck, taking Pauline down with me.
I have her nestled against my chest, and she peers out from around my arm. “What’s happening?”
I quiet her and look around the vast woods, where the trees are so dense it makes everything dark.
Pauline’s voice cracks. “Ellis, what do we…”
She’s asking me for a plan. I think of something fast. “I have a repair kit. The one I used for the tent that time.”
Her eyes are wide with relief as she gazes up at me.
When I’m certain it’s quiet, I maneuver my arm off her. Air whooshes out from where the arrow impaled through the raft’s rubber. I jump up and grab hold of the raft, as though I physically can prevent it from deflating. “Quick, get the repair kit out of the radio bag.” I twist my body around so that I’m facing Pauline as she delves into the bag. “Did you find it?”
Her hands are empty. “It’s gone, Ellis. It’s not in the bag. Did you put it somewhere else and forget?”
My voice sounds more severe than I intend. “Just look everywhere for it.”
Pauline nods, and opens and rummages through the bags. Each time she’s unsuccessful. She’s red in the face, and her hair has fallen into her eyes. Then she gazes toward the tent, and a solution seems to come to her. “Can’t we take the patch off the tent and use it on the raft?”
I shake my head. “There isn’t time.” I dislike having to dismiss her solution, but in the long run being upfront will equal time saved. By now, I’m sure my face has gone purple from straining as I try to prevent the raft from losing more air. This happening to the raft definitely isn’t part of the plan. I release my grip on the raft’s wound and air leaks out.
Pauline hastens toward me. “Don’t!”
“It’s already lost all its air.” I block her from throwing herself onto the raft, which is flat on the ground in front of us.
Pauline swallows hard as she blinks back tears. Her voice is uneven. “Could Fiona somehow be involved? Whoever did this knows about what we need for the trip and how to take these things away.”
I bring my voice down to a soft level. “Pauline, what are you talking about? Fiona’s dead.”
“I’m sorry, I…”
She slumps over and I catch her before she buckles. “It’s all right, Pauline. Have I ever told you how brave you are?”
She sniffles and stands up, moving out of my reach. “Am not.”
“Yeah, you are, actually.”
Pauline shifts her feet as though my compliment makes her uncomfortable. She begins to evaluate out loud people who are aware of her trip. I’ve come to know that getting chatty when she’s nervous is a quirk of hers.
“The company will send a new raft, right?” she says.
I move my head from side to side. “They have no way of knowing we need one. Besides, the raft’s mine.”
“I’m sorry, Ellis.” A pause. “Was it expensive?”
I chuckle. What does she think I am? Some kind of bum? “I’m only heartbroken over it because without it we’ll have to walk, and we don’t have enough supplies to last us travelling on foot.”
We move our gear out of the raft’s rubber carcass. There’s no point in hauling the raft with us while we hike, so we’ll ditch it here.
Pauline’s chest lifts when she breathes out. “So, what are we going to do?”
I take a seat on a sturdy log. “Well, we’re more than halfway finished. We would have had maybe two more days on the raft. I suggest we have no choice but to proceed onward. We’ll walk. There’s a pretty large town at the end of this route. It should be easy to get help there.”
Pauline drops down next to me. Her hand hangs above my leg and descends on my knee. I let her keep it there. “Is walking safe?”
I take in a short breath. “It’s different traveling on foot than in a raft. The greatest difference is it can take a hell of a lot longer. What I’m worried about most is our lack of supplies.” I pause and search for a conclusion. “We’ll make it last. You can have most of it.”
Pauline swings around to face me. “But you have to eat, too.”
I match her gaze and hold my eyes to hers. “So do you. I can handle eating less.” My experience pokes through my voice.
“Have you ever done something like this before? Hiked without enough supplies?”
I pause for a few moments before I answer her. “Yeah, once I have. With my brother when we were kids.”
Pauline cocks her head. “You have a brother?”
I haven’t mentioned Josh to anyone in a long time, though he’s one of the few people that I can remember. “I had an older brother. He killed himself in college.” I recall that much.
Pauline swallows air. “I’m so sorry.
I see in her eyes the exact moment our connection—our shared tragedies—becomes unbreakable. But I shrug off the intimate moment, unwilling to go to that vulnerable place yet. I set my hands on my knees and lift myself up from the log. “Let’s go quickly. Oh, and we better pack light.”
Pauline catches onto my hint and hunkers down in front of her suitcase strewn among our other bags on the beach. She removes what she needs and transfers the items into her smaller backpack. She sits on her knees and glances over at me as she unpacks and repacks, going back and forth with what she wants to keep and what she’s willing to part with. After rising, she secures her laptop case under a pine tree. I’m surprised she’s giving up her computer so easily. She must know she won’t get it back if she leaves it here. She’s not as superficial as I assumed.
I stand behind her by the pine. “You don’t mind leaving that here?”
She peeks at me over her shoulder. “It’s no use to me now.”
“Cover it with a few big leaves.”
She’s got a white tank top on, and she glances back at me from behind her smooth shoulder again. Her skin is more bronzed than when we started the tour. “Why?”
“If it rains, leaves will help block water from seeping through the case.” I riffle through the wide leaves spread over the shore and collect the dry ones, hand them to her. “With any luck, it’ll be here when the police arrive, and you can ask them to bring it back to you.”
“Thanks.” Hope brightens her eyes. “Do you really think that’s possible?”
“Sure.” But I doubt it. I’m just trying to lift her spirits. Damn, I love the sweet way she smiles without showing her teeth. I feel sorry for lying to her. I’ve held her in my arms more than once, but she’s shy around me. As I recall the way her soft, creamy skin felt under my fingers, I shiver. If I accomplish one more thing in my life it will be that I make sure she escapes unharmed afterward, no matter what might happen to me in the process. Overcome by a rush of emotions I’ve never had for a woman before, I gesture for her to rise and pull her deeply into my chest. Her body goes rigid and softens in my arms. I hold her until her tears dampen my shirt.
I take hold of her shoulders and look down into her face with a smile. “Are you all right?”
Pauline turns her head from me and nods. “I just hope we’ll be okay.”
“You will be—”
Something scrabbles in the woods behind us. Without realizing it, I’ve whipped around and my eyes are absorbed in that direction, searching.
Pauline starts to whisper, and I motion for her to be quiet. Then I turn to her and rub my hands along her smooth, warm arms. “You stay here.”
“No, don’t go. Please don’t leave me.” She reaches out, and her fingers brush against my sleeve as she tries to hold onto me and make me stay. Her eyes are as watchful as a cat’s.
“I have to check it out.” I pat her hand and slip away.
“I’m coming.” The shade of her last word is high in tone—she’s panicking.
Pauline follows behind me, and I stop short. “It’s too dangerous for you to come.” I lower my voice to make my concern sound more genuine and mask my own uncertainty over circumstances which are increasingly spinning out of control.
She raises her voice, and brings one foot closer to me. “I’m not waiting here alone.”
I sigh. She’s so stubborn. What choice do I have? I groan. “Fine, I’ll stay. But if we get killed, it’s your fault.” I wink at her so she knows I’m speaking in jest. But I’m also afraid. And it takes a lot to frighten me.
Chapter Twelve
Pauline
I’m leaving my laptop behind, because I pretty much have no choice. It saddens me somewhat that I might not ever see it again. Most everything that is high-tech is useless out here. But I take my cell phone, because even though it doesn’t work in the mountains, there’s no way I’m giving it up. I also grab my passport from one of my bags and shove it in my pocket. I’m aware that Ellis was trying to let me down easy and I won’t see any of the items we’re leaving behind again once we head out. We have enough essential items, like the heavy, bulky tent¸ which Ellis is going to carry, to heave around with us, and I’m pretty sure Ellis doesn’t count electronics like laptops as essential. My stomach knots when I think about how naïve I was when I began the trip.
Ellis twists around and reaches into his backpack. He pulls out a glinting object. I look closer. It’s a handgun. I swallow down the solid lump that settles in my throat. “You had that the whole time?” Just what exactly was this guy expecting could happen on our trip? What is he going to do with it?
Ellis starts to zipper his bag closed and glances at me. His voice is casual. “Yeah. It’s a pistol. It’s good to have. Just in case. You never know what might happen out here.” His fingers hover on the zipper.
I stand farther back from him. But this is Ellis, the guy who’s saved my butt more than once. He must have a good reason for bringing the weapon. How can I not trust him? I can’t resist making one last comment. “It’s just that I didn’t know you had that.”
He closes his backpack, then turns and watches me closely. “Is it going to be a problem?”
Before this trip, the presence of a gun would have frightened me, but now I’m glad he has it. I think. I take a few moments to respond. “No, it’s not, Ellis. I’m a city girl. I’m not used to guns.”
There’s the beginning of a smile forming on his lips, but he looks away before it emerges. I stand on my toes and pat his shoulder. I nod at the belongings and supplies Ellis and I divided into two groups: Bring and Leave Behind. “Will we be able to carry all of this?”
“Don’t you worry. I’ll be hauling most of it.”
His fingers curl across my chin. My chest tightens at the sensation of his touch. Every small vibration the motion of his hot fingers creates explodes in bursts of pleasure across my face. I tremble from the thrill and struggle to not lean forward and kiss him. Drawing in a breath helps me maintain my cool. Barely.
Ellis lifts his fingers from my skin. He must know what his touch does to me and that to take it away is cruel. I should have gone to bed with him when I had the chance. But we’re stuck out here, and I didn’t want to sleep with him because I don’t want him to feel obligated to stay afterward. How messed up is that?
Ellis winks at me over his shoulder as he heads over to cram what he can into his backpack. He’s informed me we’re only taking our packs. I follow after him to finish the same.
He puts his hands on his knees and stands up. “Do you have a piece of paper and a pen?”
Ellis did pack his journal. “Don’t you have…” Then I’m silent and keep my suggestion to myself.
I nod and unzip one of the bags I plan to leave behind to take out a notepad and a pen. I’m about to neatly tear off a piece, then stop. I probably won’t ever be seeing this notebook again. He might as well have the whole thing. I hand the pen and notepad to him.
I glance up from where I’m hunkered down packing to find Ellis writing on a slip of paper. He pauses to shake the pen when it won’t write. My throat’s dry. Is he worried we could die out here and is scribing his will? “What are you writing?” My words are just audible above the sound of the river moving behind us.
Ellis glances at me. “I’m writing a note in case someone finds our raft and belongings. I’m writing who we are, explaining the situation and where we’re headed. I’m also asking for someone to contact the police for us.” He rips off the paper and gives the notepad back to me.
I put it back into the bag I won’t be taking with me. My voice is shaky. “Good idea.” I take in the luggage before us and try to steer my mind in another, less dire direction. Small things take my mind off the horrible things. “We won’t be seeing this stuff again, will we?”
“Most likely not. There’s always the chance we can come back for what’s left of it after we reach the town and get help.
“What’s left of it?”
Ellis speaks as though what he’s saying is quite normal. “After the animals have a go at it.”
I take in air. I hadn’t counted on that.
Right before we set off, Ellis uses a rope to hook the deflated raft to a pine tree trunk. He tucks the note he’s jotted down inside the raft. I smile to myself. What has he said about me? When Ellis’s back is to me, I bend to fetch the note and read it before we set off. One side of the paper is jagged from where it’s torn. His handwriting is rough yet thoughtful, and he’s dated the note:
Pauline Choice. In trouble. Now heading toward Mayer town. Send help.
He hasn’t written anything on the paper about himself. “Ellis?” I say, hiding the paper behind my back, and he turns to look at me, a question spread across his face.
“Never mind.” I set the note back into the raft when he isn’t looking. He must have a reason for what he’s done. I suppose I could outright ask him, but then he might think I don’t trust him. He’s more experienced than I am, and I know I’m slowing him down. What happens to me if he thinks I’m ungrateful and then goes on without me? He’s the one beacon I have out here.
Ellis steps close and a muscle jerks on his face. Stubble dots his cheeks and makes him seem wilder than when we began the trip. “Is something wrong?” His body is almost pressed against mine, his scent all masculine musk. I can’t think straight with the smell of him arousing decadent longings in me. I have a hard time thinking when he’s around me. Period. Because when he’s near me, all I want is him.
My fingers quiver, but I let my breath out and work up a smile. “No. I’m as good as I can be.”
Still standing a little too near me, he returns my smile. “We’ll be okay, Pauline.”
Ellis steps away and takes the power of his scent with him. I’m able to gather my senses. He doesn’t know I read the note. I think. If I believe he has my best interests at heart, believe in him, then why am I starting to doubt him again?
I can barely walk with my overloaded pack weighing down on my shoulders, though I have it good compared to Ellis, who’s carrying two bags and our tent. I can’t very well ask him to help me carry my bag, too. I’m filled with panic. How am I ever going to make it up the mountains?
Ellis sneaks up alongside me and I jump. His hand lands on my arm to help me balance. “Take it easy, there.” The corners of his mouth edge up into a smile.
I steady myself and can only just hold back sobbing over our situation. Did Ellis really mean what he said about him eating less food than me so it’ll last longer? What if he’s underestimated the severity of our situation, and it takes longer than he thinks to reach that town—what will we eat? I’ve seen those TV shows where they drop contestants in the middle of nowhere to fend for themselves. Does Ellis know about foods from the forest that are safe for us to eat? “Ellis, are you sure about this? Maybe I should wait here while you head for the town and bring help back.”
Ellis doesn’t even stop to contemplate my suggestion before he shakes his head. “
No. That wouldn’t be safe for you. I’m not going to do that, Pauline.”
“But…But what will we do when it gets dark out?”
“We’ll sleep in the tent. It’ll be like it was before, except on foot.”
He eases into a brisk stride, and my feet move in quick steps to match his pace. Our boots whisk up the fine earth. It’s so dry out here the words forest fire burn into my mind and summon an image of me trapped inside a wall of trees with leaves thrashing from fire. Ellis is there with me in the image, but he can’t break through the circle of flames to help me. We could die out here if a fire happens. What if it happens…Nope. I can’t handle that now.
Willing my legs to accommodate my ego, I pump my arms faster as I walk, then run, to fall into Ellis’s stride, but I’m still many leaps behind him. There’s no way I want him to have to slow down for me. If that happens, my tough girl act will crumble.
Ellis stops short and slides a gaze behind his shoulder. Uh-oh. Is he going to ask me if I need him to walk slower? “Will you be okay walking the whole way?” He switches the burden of two backpacks on one shoulder to the other. “I can carry your bag.”
I’m able to catch up to him and stand beside him. “Thanks for the offer. But you can’t possibly manage three bags at once, Ellis.” My breaths come out in short puffs, giving away my physical incompetence. “I’m not as experienced as you are. I mean, you’ve spent most of your life doing this.”
“No, I haven’t.”
The silence between us stretches to an uncomfortable length.
“I used to work in finance for a short time, before I was a guide,” he says. “I left everything behind for British Columbia.”
I take in his strong features. “In Vancouver? It didn’t work out?”
“I got into a fight with my boss, and I was fired.”
“Like a fistfight? Who started it?”
“Yeah, a real fistfight. I started it. He told me he was worried that I seemed to get distracted easily. The boss was a decent guy, actually. What happened wasn’t his fault.”