by Mj Fields
“Okay then, sure. But shouldn’t we…you check in and see if your family needs you?”
“Jase and Zandor will call if they need something. Can’t sit around all day again.”
“Sure, I’m just not sure what I would do to cover it.”
He chuckled, “That’s easy.” I looked at him, “You trust me?”
“More than anyone else I’ve ever met.”
Uncaged
The shop was closed for another hour so we had plenty of time to do what I had planned. She seemed a bit nervous, “You alright?”
“I am. Kind of excited to get rid of this, but I really don’t like the pain,” she smiled up at me, “But it’ll be worth it, to be done with that part of my life completely.”
“Cool, so anything specifically you’d like?”
I flipped on the light to my room and she looked around at all the black and white photos on the walls, “Are these yours?”
“Sure are, places I’ve been. Okay Birdie lose the pants,” I really liked saying that to her, too much, I liked it too much.
She looked up at me and then quickly down as she unbuttoned her pants and then she did this little thing with her hips as she wiggled them off. And yes, I wanted her on my cock when she did that little wiggle and no this wasn’t the time or the place to be thinking about that.
“You need some help?”
She laughed as she hopped around on one foot trying to pull her leg free, “No I think I can do this.”
I wanted to do that, real fucking bad. Those little blue lace panties were so hot, just like the green ones, just like anything that covered the hottest little pussy I had ever touched. It was that right? I was whipped by that sweet little cunt, not the girl… and I could deal with that.
“Cyrus?”
My eyes swept up slowly, I wasn’t even going to try to hide that I had been looking at her, what was the point?
“Yeah Birdie let’s do this. Hop that fine, fine little ass up on the table.”
She smirked, “If we’re gonna be friends do you think you should talk to me like that?”
“You were supposed to work on being ugly. I can’t hold up my end of the deal if you’re not gonna.”
“Yeah.” She grinned and looked away.
“Lay back now Birdie. I wanna show you what I’m gonna do to you.”
She laid back and I grabbed a blanket out of the cupboard and covered her, and no-- I didn’t want to.
I grabbed a little white board and a marker, I drew a circle and the plus. “This is what we’re working with. I want to do a bird cage, small dainty like you. But the pisser is the circle should be filled in. I was thinking not completely but, swirls like this, thicker over the plus sign and smaller off of it. The door of the bird cage has to be open and at some page in the future, probably not today, a bird taking flight away from its cage. What do you think?”
She swallowed and smiled, “I think it’s perfect.”
“I am gonna go fast, get this done before Kat and the others get here. What music do you like?”
“Um anything, everything. It really doesn’t matter.”
“It matters, Metal, Rock, Pop, come on girl you have to have an opinion on something Birdie. What do you like? What gets to you?”
I know I was a little on edge, okay a lot on edge but I was nearing completion on what I promised her. She had a place, a job, a life where she got to take charge and control of her destiny. She was safe, she didn’t even realize how safe yet. Tony was long gone, last I checked George said he was in the mid-west, Missouri. That’s where he was from before he ran away from home at sixteen. Fucked up story, as much as I hated that bastard and would rip his throat out if he ever came back here, I really hoped he could get his shit together. I despised weak fucks who let drugs take over their whole lives. And now, Birdie’s tattoo was getting fixed. Promise fulfilled, job well done soldier.
“Hey, did you hear me?” Birdie sat up and looked at me.
“No, sorry I was just thinking.”
She smiled, “Thinking is good right? Why be sorry about it?”
“Music Birdie, choose now.”
“Rock.”
“That’s perfect.”
I turned on the tunes and grabbed my tools.
“Let’s get this shit done,” I clapped my hands together and rubbed them fast and hard heating them up, “You cold?”
“Nope, let’s get this over.”
She was nervous, cute as shit but I wanted her strong, tough, I didn’t want anything to ever cage her again.
I started when Alice in Chains Voices did, love this tune. Definitely something to focus on cause the damn voices in my head were perverted, unruly teenage boys lately. I was jerking off these days!? What the fuck was that about.
The song ended and I looked up at Birdie, “How we doing?”
“Good, you like that song?”
“Yeah I do.”
Stone Sour Tired was rocking in my head until Birdie giggled.
I sat up and looked at her, “Tickle?”
“No, did they just sing pulling down my little penis?”
“What?!” she was laughing and now I was.
“I am almost positive he sang pulling down my little penis.”
“Nah Birdie, Pulling down a little piece,” which was just as bad, all I could think is little penis and her little piece that my forearm was resting on, “Can you keep it together so I don’t fuck this up?”
“Sure, I’ll try,” she smiled as she laid back down.
It was quiet for a few minutes and she let out a slow deep breath.
“You alright?”
“Am I allowed to talk?”
“Talk not laugh. What’s up?”
“The beginning of this song said your name.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Yep.”
“Sirens Birdie, It’s called Sirens.”
“Nope they said Cyrus.”
“Alright Birdie, so far you’ve talked about a song that said pull my little penis down and now this one has my name?”
“Yes but by noooooo way are the two connected,” she started giggling and I stopped. She propped herself up on her elbows and looked at me, “No way connected.”
“Would you lay your ass down and let me do this? Damn you’re full of it today.”
“No, I’m just happy.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Yep, my good friend Sirens,” she stopped and laughed, “Well Cyrus did the sweetest thing for me.”
“He’s not sweet,” I reminded her because obviously she wasn’t getting it. I was a dick.
“Well anyway, I feel free. Your niece played a big part in that too. If she can smile, and laugh, and be happy… so can I. Someone loved me once, two people loved me.”
“Of course they did Birdie, they do,” I had to look away from those eyes right now or I might actually say shit I regretted or cry like a little bitch. My fucking chest actually burned. I wanted to leave the room, I needed a fucking minute, but I couldn’t leave her.
“There’s regret, deep regret that I didn’t trust my feelings about Tony. That I felt I needed him to …well it doesn’t matter that’s the past. All of it’s in the past, thanks to you. After you fell asleep last night I went through the boxes, all of them and I remembered,” tears welled in her eyes. “The dreams that I had at night Cyrus, were real, they weren’t imagined. I know my Dad used to take me fishing. He worked at a training facility for the division for youth, I remember going there when he played basketball on Sunday’s. My Mom danced, well on Saturdays she taught dance and she danced with me all the time. She did give me breakfast in bed, did you know that?”
“Yeah Birdie I saw the picture, both of you had crowns on.”
“It was mother’s day, I remember it because I wanted to make her breakfast in bed and give her the card I had made in kindergarten and she made me breakfast instead. ‘It’s both our days Tara, I’m a Mom because of you,’ I remember that.”
I reached up and wiped her tears and she laughed, I must have looked nervous because she told me they were not tears of pain but of joy.
The ocean’s release, I understood.
The song Wait for Me played when I was cleaning up. She was looking in the wall mirror swaying those little hips, she was happy.
“I love it,” I looked over at her, “You can’t even see the other.”
“I’m glad you’re happy with it,” and then she hugged me and kissed my nose.
What the hell was it with her kissing my nose? Why the hell did it make me feel like a child?
“Let’s go get something to eat,” I took her hand and walked out the door as Kat was walking in.
“You are alive?” Kat gave her best effort to smile.
“Yeah, but Charlotte isn’t well so do me a favor and see who we can get to cover Momma’s, Jase, and my shifts for a week,” I let go of Birdie’s hand and started the computer up, “Kat this is Tara, Tara Kat.”
“Pleasure,” Kat nodded.
“Pain,” Tara nodded.
“Excuse me?” Kat snapped a little and I looked up from the desk and saw Tara smirk, she was coming out of her shell.
“I just got a tattoo fixed. You said pleasure and all I could think was pain,” Tara smiled at her.
“Oh, you’re the girl they’ve been looking for.”
“Kat watch it,” I snapped.
“What’s that supposed to mean!” she snapped back.
I looked past her, “Tara, I wouldn’t say she doesn’t mean to be a bitch but obviously she does. She pulled the same shit on Carly the first time she met her. If you ignore her she’ll go away.”
“So we keeping this one too?”
“She’s a family friend Kat, if that’s what your insinuating,” I motioned her over, “Only about twenty hours to fill, can you figure it out?”
“We need more people, my artistic visions are going to shit lately. We’re tired Cyrus.”
“Fine, Zandor’s home for a while…. I’m sure he’ll want to play a little in here. After I talk to them, I’ll get back to you.”
“Why do you guys even bother with this place anymore? You’re fucking rich and own a dozen companies. It’s not like you need this place-- why not sell it?”
“This is our place Kat, always will be. As far as tired goes, I put in sixty hours plus at Steel and then my weekends and a few nights a week I’m a hundred percent here, so don’t ever complain about tired to me. I get it may drain you artistically, but if you don’t want this anymore that’s your choice. Just say the word.”
“Listen Cyrus….”
“No, you should be feeling just fine today, you had Friday and Saturday off. If you’re talking shit because you played too hard this weekend fine, but you don’t make those choices here. Look at the fucking sign out there ‘Forever Steel’ Kat. Again do what you can to fill hours. Email me and let me know what we need to fill. I’ll talk it over with Momma and be back at close.”
~
She fucking pissed me off, I grabbed Birdie’s hand and walked towards the door and she stopped me, “Are these yours?”
I looked up at Mommas little room dedicated to her children’s art, “Most Moms put shit on refrigerators, Joe Steel builds a mini museum. Let’s get the hell out of here before I do something I regret.”
I opened the door for her, yeah I did, not even thinking and she curtsied, “Thank you kind sir.” Before jumping in.
I started the Jeep and the song Wait for Me by Kings of Leon started. She reached over and turned it up and reclined the seat back and propped her feet on the dash. She lifted her shirt and unbuttoned her pants and rubbed around the gauze.
“Does it itch?”
“A little,” she looked up and smiled, “Thank you, I really like this.”
“You sure?”
“Yes, very sure. It’s beautiful.”
“Kings of Leon,” I had to say something to switch the subject.
She laughed and finally covered herself and sat up, “What?”
“Their new song, haven’t heard it yet. I love the band.”
She just smiled and nodded, beautiful fucking Birdie.
I knew what I needed to do for her, and it was gonna be real fucking hard.
Passing
He was oddly quiet on our way back and his phone rang. He tapped the button, “It’s Cyrus you’re on speaker.”
“She’s gone man,” I knew it was Jase.
“What do you need from me?”
“Not sure, just wanted to let you know. You gonna be able to work tomorrow? You feeling better?”
“Like a champ Jase. Strong and here, I’ll be at Steel in the morning, take all the time you need. Listen I don’t want to lay this all on you now but Kat is getting burnt and I’m sure the others are as well. I wanna do some hiring, you okay with that?”
“Hell yes! Life’s too damn busy. I just thought you would freak if I mentioned it. Set shit up, do what you need to do. Zandor’s home he can help interview. Get the ball rolling. Just keep in mind we will have calling hours and a funeral in a couple days.”
“I’ll be there.”
“I know you will. When did you talk to Kat?”
“Just left a few minutes ago, she was a rag to Tara. SO I may have been a bit harsh. Either way she needs to reel it in, crazy fucking talented, but damn.”
“You fix the tattoo?”
Jase sounded a little off when he asked.
“Yeah man I did,” Cyrus’ tone mimicked his.
“Alright man, think it through…”
“Jase! I will talk to you soon,” Cyrus snapped at him.
Jase laughed, “Sure, talk to you soon.”
“Hey,” I felt weird about interrupting but I couldn’t help it, “How is Bella?”
Jase laughed, “She’s great Tara, and apparently she has a magic blanket…”
“She does,” I was happy it helped, “And Carly and Joe, how are they?”
“They’re girls Tara, they’re crying…a lot. I had to get out of there. But I left them in good hands, my Little Bell and Zandor have got it covered for a few minutes.”
Cyrus laughed, “They’re taking care of Momma and Carly?”
“They are,” Jase let out a long harsh breath, “Get shit done Cyrus, and Tara good luck tomorrow. Shorts and a tank top is really the uniform?”
“Sure is, tight stuff too. I wonder who was in charge of picking those out. I grabbed a size bigger just because it felt almost obscene.”
Jase laughed loudly, “Must be a man.”
“Has to be, probably a purvey old man at that.”
Jase roared and I laughed too. I looked at Cyrus and his face was expressionless.
“If Bella needs a place to hang out I’m available.”
“Thanks Tara, we may take you up on that.”
~
We pulled in the driveway, “What exactly is your job there?”
“Trainer, which I have never done, but they seem to think I qualify. I was applying for the receptionist position but I guess this was available as well. I did some after school clubs when I was in high school at the Y for the younger kids and they said I would be perfect.”
“Was Carly with you?”
“Yes, but she got in a workout while I was interviewing. Weird that the first place I went I was hired. But I’m happy. It’s like a dream job for me. I think they said something about tuition after a 90 day trial period. So I could go to school as well.”
“For?”
“I don’t know. Maybe nutrition, maybe psychology,” I laughed, “Maybe a nutritional psychologist.”
He was looking at me funny, I smiled, “What?”
“What are your hours?”
“At my job?”
“Yes Tara, at your job.”
Okay he was kind of acting like an ass, “Seven to four, Monday through Friday. If I want to earn more I can pick up extra hours. But I think I should try to get the hang o
f it before I take on private clients.”
His jaw tightened and eyes narrowed, “Yeah, of course you should take a few months to get …whatever.”
I smiled, “Is everything okay?”
“Yep, everything’s fine.”
I got out and looked at him, “Hey Cyrus, you should come in and tell me about you. I just learned today that you own a few businesses and …”
“I’ll walk you in.”
Man he was being curt. When he got next to me I reached to feel his forehead and he stepped back.
“I’m fine.”
I would not let his mood squash mine. I was going to be happy. Grateful for what I had and what I have now.
He was staring at me when I finally looked up.
I smiled and looked away.
“Tara, you have a key correct?”
“Oh, yep, I have a key.” I reached in my pocket and it wasn’t there, “No, I don’t it must have fallen out.”
He sucked his teeth and rolled his eyes.
“They’re probably in your Jeep Cyrus.”
He pulled them out of his pocket, “You left them on the floor at the shop. You can’t be fucking careless with shit like this Tara. What if someone else got them?”
“Well, they probably would have handed them to me?” I said under my breath as he unlocked the door and pushed it open.
“No Tara don’t be naive. You need to be careful, not careless.”
I walked past him and into the kitchen. I took out the left over soup and some frozen garlic knots and wanted to throw them in the microwave just to make him mad like he was trying to make me but I didn’t. He kept going.
“You need to put them in a bag, do you have a purse? Maybe we could change the door knob and get you a key pad so if you fucking lose them …What would you have done Tara? If you lost your keys what would you have done?”
I put a pot on the stove and the knots in the oven. He was being an ass and I was going to ignore it.
“Are you going to answer me?”
I shook my head no and tried to walk past him.
He grabbed me around the waist and turned me towards him.
He stared at me, angry, he was so angry. I didn’t want to cry but I wasn’t going to answer him.