by M. N. Forgy
There’s something about taking the life of a man, it does something to me. After everything is said and done, I don’t feel bad, but I don’t feel good about it either. It’s as if I know I had to do it to protect; a dog eat dog world. A mask will fall into place any minute and I will push through it like I was taught to do in the north and I’ll live my life.
Just like any other murderer.
“I’ll close Centerfolds, why don’t you head home and get cleaned up?” Jinx offers and I accept. Plus, I have blood all over me and that will draw attention for sure.
Driving home, something excited and light sits in my chest, maybe the fact that I have someone at home waiting for me? It’s an odd feeling, but one I most definitely like. I wonder what Aspen and Halle did at my place today, God, I hope they’re still there. Last thing I need is to go out and find them and worry about an alibi for their asses.
Hand on the throttle, I release all the thoughts in my mind and try to reset my mind. Though the blood sticking to my skin goes cold and makes it hard, the sound of my bike on the road is of encouragement.
I pull my bike into the driveway and find my house hasn’t been burnt down so, that’s a good sign. Once inside, I find the coffee table cleaned of my empty beers, and my brows furrow.
Please don’t tell me she cleaned the damn house.
I stop when I see Halle and Aspen asleep on the couch.
Halle and she are both curled up into each other, fast asleep. I shut the door quietly and lock it, not able to take my eyes off the girls on my couch. You don’t do the things I do and get to come home to something like this. It’s serene, and… has me feeling some kind of way. Every inhale and exhale is of them on my couch sleeping. My house smells of them, their faces imprinting in my head. Scratching my cheek, I pick a piece of something off my face, and I’m reminded of what the fuck I look like. I need to get a shower before one of them sees me. I don’t want either of them to see the blood and never look at me the same again. I head straight to the bathroom and turn the shower on to wash the blood off. Pulling my clothes off, I toss them on the floor and step into the warm water. The sound of the body under the train echoes in my head as the blood swirls down the drain, and I close my eyes trying to unsee it all. I need to reset my mind and move forward just like any other time. Resting my arms on the wall, my jaw tics as I see and hear the train and the body over and over. Why is this happening? I never have a problem resetting my mind back to reality. The sound of the water filling my ears as I drown out the world and let everything that happened tonight sink in. Maybe because it was Halle’s dad, or I wanted Kace to suffer more. Killing him was too easy of an out for him for the shit he’s done in his life and I just let him off. I open my eyes, I notice the water is now cold. How long have I been standing here?
I turn the faucet off and pull back the curtain, finding Aspen sitting on the toilet. I cover my dick with both hands instinctively.
“What the fuck?” I clip. Her eyes climb from the bloody clothes up my body to my eyes.
“What happened?” she mutters, the softness in her voice making me feel like a villain, but I did it for her. I have never once felt guilty for doing my job. I don’t feel bad now, but I do have a stirring inside I can’t explain.
“Don’t worry about it. It’s over,” I tell her, reaching for the towel across me, I wrap it around my waist and step out just as she stands up. Our bodies are close, too close. I can smell her breath as it whispers across my face, her eyes looking at me in that way and it makes my dick grow with hardness. She leans forward to kiss me, and I turn. I hear her inhale the rejection and I grab her by the chin.
“I don’t kiss anyone,” I explain with more gruffness to my voice than I intended. But I say it out of habit rather than meaning it, because looking at her hurt lip, something twists inside of me making me want to kiss it better. Letting her face go, I grab her by the ass and lift her, placing her on the counter.
I run my nose down the crook of her neck, and she moans, her hands all over at me all at once. Grabbing her ridiculous flowery dress by the cleavage I rip it down, exposing her perky tits sitting in a lacy pink bra. I help her unsnap her bra, and slowly slide one hand in between her legs, caressing her inner thigh while the other hand cups her tit, pinching her nipple in-between my fingers. The hiss that escapes those lips has me bite my own to keep from enveloping her pretty little mouth with my own. I want to kiss her, taste her, and bite that fucking bottom lip so hard that every time she runs her tongue across the cut she thinks of me.
I can’t do that though, I know it will only confuse things between us more, so I run my hands up her back, pushing her chest into my face and I bite at the soft creamy flesh of her right tit hard, making sure to leave teeth marks.
Her hands run through my hair, her legs wrapping around me as I lay claim to her. Our breathing picks up, the animalistic fuck inside of me wanting to be inside of her now. I tug at her dress wanting the shit off of her, and then her panties. Her pussy is bare of any hair, and I run my finger over her swollen clit. She bucks against my hand, and I smirk at how reactive her body is to my touch. I’ve wanted to touch her since the day I saw her on the stage and I’m going to finally get to tonight.
“Wait,” she moans, her hands pressing against my chest and my balls instantly feel like they were kicked. “I’ve only been with Kace, I’m not like…” She pauses, and I look to her with hooded eyes. She’s too pure for me, so innocent and angelic. She’s only been with a man that was her husband, could she get any more perfect?
“I’ll be your last, Aspen.” I breathe heavily, grabbing her by the nape of the neck, I bite at her chin and she comes alive within my hold. My words being just what she needed to break through her good girl walls.
She uses her pink painted toenails to tear the towel from my hips, I position her on the edge of the sink just right before slipping inside her sweet little cunt. She’s so wet and tight I can’t help but groan against her neck, not wanting her to see the stupid look of pleasure across my face. I thrust in and out of her, my fingers digging into her ass-cheeks as I fuck her.
Her hands fly at my arms and back for purchase, we fuck so hard our bodies slip and slide all over the goddamn counter.
“Yes! Yes!” she whimpers, her body tensing as if she’s about to explode all over my cock.
Close to the brim myself, it occurs to me I didn’t put a condom on, I need to pull out and I don’t want to. I slam my fist into the mirror behind me, lost in the sea of sex, and reluctantly pull my dick out of her and come all over her sweet little thighs.
Both of us breathing hard, I slowly raise my head, her lips are parted, her skin flushed.
“Did you finish?”
She nods, her eyes lazy with lust. I bend down and grab my damp towel and wipe up her legs, stopping at her bruised knees. I run my thumb over her kneecap.
“They’ll get used to the stage,” I tell her, and she looks up at me with doe eyes. She grabs the towel with a sweet smile on her face and rubs the cum off her chest as I grin. “Sorry, guess I had more in there than I thought.”
She smiles, and tosses the towel back at me while trying to pull up what’s left of her dress.
The broken mirror catches my eye and I sigh. I can’t believe I really did that. Losing control isn’t me.
Slipping off the counter, she begins to nibble on her nail nervously. Grabbing the towel, I wrap it around my torso and rub my face with my hands, I’m fucking tired.
“Why don’t you and Halle take my bed, it’s late,” I offer, not really sure what to say. Women crashing at my house isn’t exactly commonplace for me.
“You sure?” She crosses her arms, that angelic demeanor that has me by the balls making my chest squeeze.
“Yeah, I’m sure. Grab a shirt, pants, whatever you need,” I tell her, feeling bad I ripped her dress.
She laughs, pulling at the rags.
“I mean, to be honest, it was a hideous dress.”
; “Yeah, it was. I was just trying to play the mom at the park, I guess,” she confesses, and this grabs my attention.
“Aspen, I’ve seen a lot of moms out there and I can definitely say you’re a good mom.” Her smile drops, her eyes looking at me with a solid stare. I can only imagine what Kace and her parents said to her when she became a stripper, but I know she’d do anything for her daughter, more than some of those women who wear flower printed dresses, mom-styled hairdos, and have reputable jobs. Aspen is a good mom.
“Thanks North.” Her voice is merely a whisper. The tone taking on a serious vibe, I look away, and she steps out. Shutting the door behind her.
If I turned into a pussy with her and that kid sleeping on my couch I can’t wait to see what the fuck I do in the morning when they’re in my bed.
Aspen
I go into North’s room to change before waking up Halle. I don’t want her to see my dress like this. Opening his closet, I pull out a black shirt and pull it over me. The sight of North’s teeth marks just catching my eye before the material covers the swollenness. I bite back a smile at how feral he was, it’s as if he couldn’t have enough of me. There was so much passion and untamed attraction between North and I that it makes the times Kace and I had sex look dull and numb. It was pure vanilla sex, a marriage based off of when we were kids and not what was happening between us in the present. Going to the dresser, I open the second drawer, knowing there’s nothing in the first one that I need, and find some gray sweatpants. I pull them up and find they’re too big, so I have to tie them as tight as they will go.
I kick my dress under Kace’s bed with my foot and go to Halle on the couch. Picking her up, I take her to the bedroom and cover her up. I turn around and turn the lights off and shut the door, concealing the room in a blanket of darkness before climbing on the bed and under the blankets. His blankets are fluffier than they look and swallow us both up. The pillow smells like him and I nestle into it more as I watch Halle sleep. My body is sore but in a good way from the hands of North, and my mind races with images of the blood-soaked clothes on the bathroom floor. You’d think I’d ask more questions, or be frightened by the sight of them, but if anything, it just conveyed that North kept his promise to me.
My parents are out of my life, and now Kace is gone.
I’m on my own, to be whoever I want and if tonight is any indication of what my future holds it’s never going to be boring.
Jesus, who am I becoming and what will happen next?
Seven
North
Waking up from my body crunched into the small sofa, I stretch out and open my eyes to find Halle looking right over me. Her eyes are so cheerful, and face so youthful.
“What do you want?” My tone is grumpy.
“I’m going to be a basketball player.”
Sitting up, my eyes crusted with sleep, I stare at the young girl.
“Shouldn’t you be in school or something?”
“It’s summer, duh,” Halle sasses, sitting on the couch next to me.
Rubbing my hands down my face, I try to wake myself up. I need to go to the clubhouse and talk to Chaos, tell him what went down last night.
“Halle! I told you not to wake him up!” Aspen walks out of the kitchen, scolding Halle. She’s wearing my shirt, one I’ve had since my high school days. Her nipples poke through the material, making me want another round of what went down in the bathroom last night, so I look away.
“Is it okay if I wear these? I’m going to go to my place and change before work tonight—”
“Yeah, that’s fine,” I interrupt her. I’m not used to this much chatter this early in the morning. Wait, is it morning? What time is it? Flexing my neck back, I look to the clock. Shit, it’s noon. I missed church.
Standing up, I head down the hallway to find some clothes and get to the club.
“Um, should I bring Halle with me tonight?” Aspen asks from down the hall.
Shit, I forgot about the babysitting thing.
“Yes, bring her.”
“Are you sure, Valley seemed really—”
“Valley is just scared of you,” I explain, trying to get ready.
Aspen appears at the bedroom door, her eyes looking me up and down.
“I don’t think she’s scared of me.” Aspen seems amused by my statement and crosses her arms. “I mean, I can take Halle to the babysitter now that Kace is…”
“No, you need to act as if nothing has happened. You don’t know anything about Kace.” I wake up instantly, straightening my back, I grab her by the chin to look me in the eyes.
“This is very important. As far as you know, Kace is still a piece of shit out there doing everything he can to sabotage you. Last time you saw him was yesterday when you met up for drop off, and he was drunk. Got it?”
She nods, her face flashing with a sense of fear. I grab both sides of her face trying to reel her in. If she loses it, then we’re all fucked.
“Am I going to be okay?” she whimpers, and I feel it all the way to my gut. I can’t take her tears or her being scared, this woman does something to me on a level I can’t understand.
I grin in an attempt to ease her nerves. “Of course.”
I tug on my leather cut and head out the front door.
“Bye North!” Halle hollers just before the door slams. I glance over my shoulder as I walk to the motorcycle. That kid is something else. I don’t like children and I would think she would catch the hint by now but she just keeps at me.
Straddling my bike, I start it and back it out of the driveway. Revving it up, I take off. The warm air rushing around me and drowning out everything ringing in my head. Tires on asphalt, the sun on my leather cut, I head to the clubhouse, eager to see my brothers. I’ve been out of character the last twenty-four hours and they’re the only thing that makes sense right now. Maybe they can clear up what the hell I’ve been thinking.
Pulling into the parking lot of the club, I park next to one of the bikes, it looks like Chaos’. Kicking out my kickstand, I rest my bike and climb off. Shit, I hope he’s not pissed I missed church.
Inside I find him next to a pool table casually drinking a beer. His hair is disheveled as usual, his beard giving him an intimidating look. He looks every bit of a biker compared to me.
“You missed church,” he informs.
“I know,” I mutter, coming inside further. “What’d I miss?”
He turns around facing the pool table and racks the balls for the opening shot. I grab a cue stick. Chaos is a man of pool. Some sit down and drink coffee and shoot the shit, Chaos plays pool.
He takes the opening shot, calling solids when balls two and three sink into a pocket.
I aim my shot and take a deep breath.
“So some shit went down last night.”
“Everything okay?” I feel Chaos’ eyes on me, but not out of anger but concern.
“Jinx and I took out an ex-cop that was causing some trouble with one of the girls working at the club,” I explain further, this catches Chaos’ attention to the point he doesn’t take his turn.
“A fucking cop? Where’s the body? Do we need to cover anything up, pay anyone off?” he asks one question after another, wanting to make sure I’m taking care of, that the brotherhood is not at risk.
“Jinx and I made it look like an accident on the train tracks, so it shouldn’t be a problem.” I set my cue stick down and rub the back of my neck nervously.
Chaos nods and slaps me on the back.
“I know you take protecting Centerfold to heart, but I’ve never seen you go to these lengths for any of the women there.”
“Yeah, there’s this new girl who has a kid and I’m all out of sorts.” I point to my head, indicating how screwed up I’ve been lately.
He laughs a full belly laugh, then takes his turn nailing almost every solid into a pocket.
“Behind every man stands a woman who has him by the balls, brother.”
Shaking my head,
I grin, knowing he just whooped my ass in pool.
“Thanks for the brotherly chat.”
The rest of the day I play pool with the boys and drink beer. This is the kind of life I signed up for, the brotherhood I always wanted. I don’t think about the dead body on the tracks, and I try my hardest not to think about Aspen and Halle, but I keep looking at the clock waiting for opening hours of Centerfolds to see them.
“Oh, and what’s this about a kid being at the strip club?” Chaos asks me as I’m stretched over the pool table about to make a shot. My eyes pop over to his, my mouth parting.
Shit.
Eight
Aspen
My house is trashed. The front door has been busted open, and everything inside the house has been tipped over, drug out, and ruined. Everything that was mine and I worked for. My mouth parts, my eyes filling with tears. Why is it every time I take one step forward I’m knocked back ten?
“We’ve been robbed!” Halle gasps before looking at me with a face the color of Casper. Jesus, everything is ruined. Bending down, I pick up a picture of me and Halle that’s been ripped up. This was no random robbery, this was personal. Kace did this after I took Halle when he went looking for me.
Hands on my hips, I take a deep breath but it does nothing for my anxiety.
“Yeah, it looks like it.” I lie to Halle, she’s a kid and wouldn’t understand why her dad would destroy her home. The important thing now is he’s gone and can’t hurt us anymore. “But um, we can just clean it up, and North can help us fix the front door, you know?” I stay optimistic, bending down to pick up Halle’s Basketball card collection. It’s got a couple sheets ripped out. He never did like her being into basketball, he always yelled at her to get into cheerleading or something more girlie. It angered me because Halle can do anything despite her gender.
Stepping into the kitchen, all my dishes are on the ground and shattered. They were all bought from the dollar store, but still, I bought those when Kace refused to give me any of the dishes we got for our wedding. I moved into this place with an air mattress, and a TV I literally had to bite out of Kace’s hands. That was before we got a judge involved in separating belongings.