“I’m not following you.” But Miah placed the towel by the sink and anchored his hands on the counter so he could hear Caleb out. If there was any way, any hope . . .
“She doesn’t give up as easily as you think. Somewhere in her heart, there’s the capacity to forgive you . . . again . . . you’re such an idiot, but whatever. She can forgive you, Miah. If she can do that, she can give you another chance.”
He shook his head. “Not sure I deserve it. David was still in the hospital and I just loaded up his stuff and dumped it all on her.”
“You made a mistake. You’re not perfect; you just like to think you are.” Caleb’s mouth quirked. “Besides, if you don’t deserve a second chance, then who does?”
“What?”
Caleb leaned forward on the butcher-block counter. “You’ve spent your life protecting our country. You put your life on the line so families were free to sleep at night. You protected so others wouldn’t have to. If you don’t deserve a second chance, who does?”
Miah patted Caleb’s forearm. “Not sure it works like that.”
Caleb leaned away from him. “I just never thought I’d see you run away.”
Miah’s fingers clamped on to the edge of the counter. No one could make him mad faster than Caleb. “I’m not—”
“Miah. Gray has loved you her whole life. Don’t you think she deserves this?”
His hands were going sweaty. “She deserves better—”
“Stop it. Man, for a dude who walks around like God’s gift, you really have no self-esteem, do you? Who will love her more? Who will take better care of her? Who do you want to grow old with, Miah? And more importantly, who do you want her to grow old with?”
Miah’s face was slick with sweat because, for the first time in two weeks, he was convinced he might not have completely ruined his life. Miah swabbed his face with the dish towel. It smelled like spaghetti sauce. His heart pounded against his chest like a drum, thumping away the moments, ushering in the thought that maybe, just maybe, he could actually fix this. But his mind was a blank. Even the idea that he might still have a chance with Gray caused his muscles to seize up.
There was a knock at the door. It took a moment to register the sound and when Miah finally did, Caleb was already making his way there.
Hope and fear fought inside Miah’s chest. Could it be Gray?
Caleb pulled the door open to David and Stacey. “Hey, science nerd.”
David grinned. “Hey, meathead. Can I talk to Miah?”
Miah stepped into the living room, his heart floating on hope. David was here. This was the first time he’d come to the lodge since the snowmobile incident. “Come in.”
Caleb looked at Stacey. “You want some hot cocoa? Miah made it earlier. We can warm it up in the kitchen while these two talk.”
She nodded and pulled her jacket off, then followed Caleb.
David walked into the room, shoulders squared and a serious look on his face. “I’m here to talk to you man-to-man.”
“Okay.” Miah followed him to the couch and David motioned for him to sit down. He obeyed and watched as David paced the floor in front of him, his hands deep in his pockets. “My mom’s out on a date.”
Miah lurched forward. “A date?” What? It had only been two weeks.
“Yeah, with that plastic-looking cat doctor who smiles too much. I don’t even think those teeth are real; I think he stole ’em from a horse.”
A date. Flu-like symptoms rushed his body. Again.
“Here’s the thing. She’s a really great lady. She doesn’t like the cat doctor, not really, she just has her heart hurt and she wants to make it better.”
Miah dropped his gaze. “David, I’ve ruined everything.”
He moved over to him, patted Miah’s shoulder. “It’s okay. You can fix it.”
He looked up to find his son’s face full of hope. “I ruined things with you, too. I made a really stupid mistake. I thought I was doing the right thing having you move in with Gray. I didn’t want to see anything bad happen to you.”
David dropped onto the couch beside him. “But it did happen. Not the accident, but you. We lost you. We don’t want to lose you, Miah. Mom doesn’t either, she just . . . she’s so used to having to be strong for everyone else. She’s sooooo mad at you, but she really, really in her heart loves you.”
“It might be too late.”
“I listened to her cry herself to sleep for the first week. Now, she’s just pretending like we can move on. But we can’t move on. Not without you.”
Emotions swelled to the point where Miah could no longer contain them. Here his son was exhibiting more strength than he could muster. Here, his son was trying to repair all of their broken hearts. He pivoted and took David’s face in his hands. “Do you remember when I screwed up on the fishing trip? You told me that just because you weren’t good at it didn’t mean you didn’t want to try?”
David nodded, causing Miah’s hands to bob up and down. “I want to try, David. I’m not very good at being your dad, but I want to try. I’m so sorry I pushed you away.” There were tears streaking Miah’s face. David reached up, brushed them off.
“You’ll always be my dad.” And with those few words, Miah broke. He pulled his son into a hug and held him there while the tears fell.
A few minutes later, Caleb and Stacey came out of the kitchen. “So, what’s the game plan?” Caleb said.
Miah stood, brushing the last of the tears from his face.
Caleb pointed to Stacey. “She told me why they came. What’s your move, Miah?”
He didn’t know. All he could think about was the fact that Gray was on a date and that now he felt the tiniest shred of hope that he could correct things. “Tomorrow—”
David groaned. “Tomorrow? She’s out there now. With someone else.”
Miah clamped his teeth together, fighting off the images shooting through his mind. “You’re right.”
David raised his hands and dropped them with a clop. “You gotta go. Now. She’s at the Neon Moon.”
Miah nodded, but sudden fear stole his focus. Black spots appeared before his eyes and the blood in his veins stopped moving. He was aware of Caleb moving in closer and grabbing his arm.
“He’s useless.” Caleb dragged him to the front door. “I’ll drive him to her. You guys wait at Stacey’s house. If this thing goes south, he’ll need some recoup time. I’ll call you in an hour.”
Miah was aware of being led toward his truck. What was he going to do when he got there? It wasn’t like they hadn’t seen each other; it wasn’t like he was some white knight riding in on a horse and rescuing her. This was a disaster of his own making. He wasn’t the answer to the problem. He was the problem.
“You need to breathe, bro.”
Miah sucked a deep breath as if it were a foreign thing. “I don’t know what I’m going to say.”
Caleb pulled the truck onto the main road. “You love her, right?”
“She already knows I do.”
“I guess that’s as good a place to start as any.”
Miah nodded and counted the minutes until they pulled into the parking lot of the Neon Moon.
CHAPTER 16
Blah, blah, blah. She knew the cat doctor was talking, but all she could hear was blah, blah, blah. Vince Evers had launched into another story about how he discovered one of his clients was taking the anxiety pills he’d prescribed for her high-strung schnauzer. When a new Blake Shelton song came on, she perked up. “Oh. I love this song.”
He paused for half a second then went on with his story as if his voice were the most incredible thing one could hear. Under her breath, she muttered, “Doesn’t even come close to Blake’s.”
The good doctor blinked his bright blue eyes at her. “What?”
Oops. She toyed with her salad. “Oh,
nothing. Just saying again how much I like this new song.”
“Right.” He smiled and kept talking.
She wondered if it were possible to steal teeth from horses. She’d never noticed how long his were until David mentioned it before she started getting ready. Garish, really. Long and blue-white. Unnatural. She glanced down at her watch to find she’d only been there thirty minutes. Gah. Gray let her mind trail back to earlier in the night. Women and broken watches and how David’s face lit up sharing the insights on women and time and shopping and suddenly, without any warning, her heart hurt.
When the hair on the back of her neck prickled, she stood. “Would you excuse me for a couple minutes?” She’d seek solitude in the bathroom. By David’s estimation, a couple minutes could be fifteen in woman-time. Then she could return to the table and maybe only have to endure another five or so, then, she could go home.
“Absolutely. I’ll be right here.”
That’s what I’m afraid of. She turned to go to the restroom and slammed into a chest. Her eyes trailed up, up, up. But she knew that scent. She didn’t need to see the face. His hands closed over her upper arms, and instantly her flesh came alive beneath his grasp.
“Gray,” he whispered. And in her name, she heard more than a single word should contain. She heard love and hope and a promise. When his body shifted to accommodate her, she felt a thousand tomorrows in his touch. She dared not look up in his eyes. She knew what she’d find. Of course she did; this was Miah and she was Gray and what was between them was as powerful as it was inexplicable. And it was death for her.
“Don’t,” she whispered back. Why did the contact with his body steal every last bit of energy from hers? It was like grabbing a live wire and then being perplexed by the damage.
He released her with one hand and used it to capture her chin. He lifted her face until their eyes met.
Movement beside them faded into their space. She heard the voice of her date. “Excuse me, but, uh, that’s my date. I’m afraid you are over the line here.”
Gray’s eyes drifted shut; such weakness filled his voice, it would be pathetic if she wasn’t a little relieved at the interruption. Miah left her and the spot where he’d been was cold. He got nose to nose with her date, then dared him to come closer. The cat doctor dropped into his seat with a plop. Miah leaned over the table like a grizzly over a meal and stared him down. His voice was low and deadly. “This is the mother of my child and you’re going to sit right there with your mouth shut while I talk to her.”
Gray actually heard his mouth snap closed. Within a heartbeat, Miah was back and holding her. “Gray, I made a mess of everything. But I’m begging you to give me another chance. David and you are the only things in the world that matter. I don’t want to miss him growing up. I want to be there every day. But that’s not why I’m here now. I love you, Gray. I don’t think I can live without you. I want you in my bed every night and in my arms every morning.”
A vise had clamped her heart. It couldn’t beat, couldn’t send blood through her system. Miah went on, “David said you cried for the first week. He’d hear you late at night.”
Panic rushed in. She didn’t think he’d known.
“I’ve caused you enough pain. From now on, I only want to cause you happy tears. Gray, I love you and I want you to marry me.”
The room spun. Somewhere off in the distance there was a real world where women went on dates with self-impressed veterinarians. Out there was a world where twelve-year-olds acted their age. But right here, here was the fairy tale. It was she and Miah, and she was useless to fight him because she loved him. Had always loved him. Would always love him. But fear surged into her mind, taking it captive. Miah wasn’t perfect, but he’d given up so quickly. Maybe he’d learned and maybe he’d never do that again. But what if he did? What if a year or two or ten down the road, something scared him and just like that, he’d be gone? She couldn’t survive it. She needed someone who would fight to the death for her if that’s what it took. Her heart screamed yes, but her mind fought back. In a breathy whisper, she uttered, “No.”
For being a mountain of a man, it looked like a gust of wind could knock him over. “What?” He drew closer, examining her face.
“I said no.” With each word she felt stronger, more powerful. At least if she only depended on herself, she could survive the worst life could throw at her.
His breathing hitched and, for an instant, she wondered if he would pass out.
“I’m sorry, Miah.”
He dropped his hands from her. His face had gone white.
Gray swallowed, but her throat was cotton. She drifted away from him and started to slide back into the seat across from her date, but strong hands clamped on her arm and pulled her right back. “And I’m not giving up,” he growled. “I won’t give up on you, Gray. I’ll fight for the rest of my life and if God will let me, I’ll fight for you right into the next life. I’m sorry. Maybe that’s not fair to you, but I’m just not letting go. Not. Ever. Again.”
He was a prince on a white horse, his words sailing right into the deepest part of her heart. They wound around her uncertainty; they liberated her fear. But Gray wasn’t some weakened, emaciated princess. In the root of her being, she was strong. She’d meet her man face-to-face, toe-to-toe. If he said he was never giving up, she’d make him prove it. Right now. Gray jerked free from him and clamped her teeth shut. “You’re not giving up?”
Confusion flickered across his face. “I’m never giving up.”
She grabbed his chin. “Look me in the eye and say it again.”
A smile threatened to appear on his face, she could see it, toying at the edges of his mouth. And she knew he understood. Because a night, not long before, they’d stood in the parking lot of a speakeasy declaring their love, each one telling the other to “say it again.”
He fought the grin no longer. “I’m not ever giving up on you. On us.”
It was there, in the Neon Moon with her date beside her and the man she loved captured between her thumb and index finger, that Gray felt the first sensations of what life without fear could offer. She’d been a captive for so long, but now she was free. Her smile was quick. Eyes blinking back the tears she didn’t want to cry. “You swear?”
“I do.”
Her heart beat with the knowledge of what she was about to do. Enormous in its scope, all-encompassing in its radius. She was Gray and he was Miah and together, they were something more, something beyond human comprehension, something that could span galaxies and live out the fairy tale she’d always dreamed. With plump tears in her eyes, she said, “I do, too.” She threw her arms around his neck. “Miah, I love you.”
He held her there for a moment then tilted to look at her. “That’s it? Now we can move on together?”
“Yes.” She shook her head and her hair danced over his arms. “All I ever wanted was for you to fight for me. Knowing you will . . . it gives me everything I need.”
When his body melted against her, Gray kissed him, her mouth closing over his, their hearts pounding against one another. And again, she heard the distinct sound of applause.
They glanced around the room to find an audience of captivated dinner guests watching them. The cat doctor scooted from the seat and mumbled something about not paying the check. In a moment, he was gone. The people in the Neon Moon faded away and there was only Gray and Miah. “Let’s take a walk,” he growled in her ear.
She grabbed her jacket from the seat while he tossed money on the table. “At this time of night?”
“Yeah. I know a great little graveyard right around the corner.”
He tucked her beneath his arm as they left the restaurant. “Oooooh. I love graveyards.”
EPILOGUE
Gray smiled at her reflection in the mirror—Mrs. Jeremiah McKinley. Miah entered the hotel room with a full ice bucket for the c
hampagne. The wedding had been a quick one because Gray didn’t care about things like long white dresses and hundreds of flowers. They’d taken David and Caleb and the whole crew from the artists’ retreat and gone to Eureka Springs. Of course, she’d tried to get Miah on board with having the service in the graveyard and she’d failed. The quaint turn-of-the-century hotel provided a perfect backdrop of natural beauty for the service, complete with a rocky waterfall nestled in the beautiful Arkansas Mountains. She had to concede; it was a better choice than leaning headstones and rusty fences.
David had left the hotel with Charlee and Ian and would stay with them for a few days while Gray and Miah had their honeymoon. Caleb would be checking up on David while he did his painting therapy with Mr. Gruber.
Gray’d just pulled a delicate piece of black-lace lingerie from her suitcase, but before she could steal away into the bathroom, Miah caught her in his arms. He ran a finger under the edge of the shoulder strap of her wedding dress, sending her body into orbit. “What’s this?” He took the lingerie from her hand, letting it dangle on his finger.
“That should be obvious.” She giggled when the strap of her dress slipped right off her shoulder. He lowered the silky black garment and dropped a kiss on the bare spot where her dress strap had been.
“You won’t be needing it.” He tossed the lingerie back into her suitcase and spun her to face away from him then concentrated his attention on the tiny pearl buttons on the bodice of her gown. “You won’t be needing this, either.”
Her gaze trailed to the bed, exposing her neck. He dropped a kiss there on the vessel throbbing beneath her jaw while he continued to loosen the gown. His hands moved with the precision of a soldier who could fieldstrip a rifle and reassemble it in total darkness. Gray cleared her throat; it had gone completely dry. The truth was, she was as nervous as . . . well . . . as a virgin on her wedding night. But she was also excited. Because in her mind, she’d played out this fantasy hundreds of times and already this was better than any her mind had created. When the top of her dress was loose and she had to use her forearms against her ribs to hold it in place, she pulled one solid, steadying breath. “Miah,” she whispered.
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