Love Me to Death

by Sharlay

  3.4 Use any form of audio/video recording equipment in the presence of Second Party unless required to do so for his role as “lover.”

  3.5 Consume any form of alcohol or drug during his contractual agreement with Second Party. Failure to adhere to this may result in the accidental breach of point 3.1 and will void the entire contractual agreement.

  3.6 Engage in any sexual contact/activity with Second Party.

  3.7 Touch, kiss or grope Second Party unless required to do so in direct relation to his role as “lover.”

  3.8 Date, text, call, touch, kiss, grope or engage in any sexual contact/activity with any potential lover. Failure to do this will directly affect the authenticity of his role as “lover.”

  3.9 Harbor any feelings, affection or fall in love with Second Party.

  4) If First Party fails to adhere to any of the points in section 3 in the contractual agreement:

  4.1 The contract will be terminated with immediate effect.

  4.2 Second Party will have the right to withhold all outstanding payments to First Party indefinitely.

  4.3 All monies paid to First Party by Second Party will be refunded to Second Party with immediate effect.

  5) If the terms of the contractual agreement are met then Second Party agrees to:

  5.1 Pay an agreed total sum of $60,000 to First Party by 10/17/2016.

  5.2 Make a payment of $5000 on the 17th of every month to First Party’s chosen bank account until 10/17/2016.

  6) If First Party meets all of the terms of the contractual agreement and Second Party fails to adhere to section 5 in the contract then in the event that:

  6.1 Second Party makes a late payment she will pay an additional $10.00 for every day a payment is late to First Party.

  6.2 Second Party makes no payments to First Party during the period of the contractual agreement then Second Party will pay a further $15,000 in addition to the $60,000 that she neglected to pay by 11/17/2016.

  7) In the event of Second Party’s death during or after the period of the contractual agreement:

  7.1 First Party will continue to be paid monthly installments to the total sum of $60,000 until 10/17/2016.

  8) In the event of Second Party’s death during or after the period of the contractual agreement First Party must:

  8.1 Attend Second Party’s funeral.

  8.2 Continue in his role as “lover” to all of Second Party’s family, friends, co-workers, and acquaintances in the lead up to and during the funeral day.

  8.3 Play an active role in Second Party’s funeral should her family request it.

  8.4 Lose ALL contact with Second Party’s family, friends, co-workers, and acquaintances two weeks after Second Party’s funeral.

  8.5 Never disclose any information regarding this contractual agreement to any other living human being.

  9) If First Party fails to adhere to any of the points in section 8 in the contractual agreement:

  9.1 The contract will be terminated with immediate effect.

  9.2 All payments to First Party will stop immediately.

  10) If First Party fails to adhere to any of the points in the contractual agreement and Second Party is not willing to compromise then the contractual agreement will be terminated with immediate effect.

  11) If both parties (First Party and Second Party) agree to every term of the contractual agreement and both sign this document:

  11.1 The contract will take immediate effect.

  11.2 A sum of $5000 will be made to First Party’s chosen bank account immediately.

  We, the undersigned, agree to all the provisions listed above and sign this document of our own free will.

  Signed:

  Yup, I was right, I definitely just read what I thought I read. I look up at Ned in confusion. “What the hell is this?”

  “A contract.”

  “Yeah, I know but what kind of job is this? You want me to play the role of ‘lover’ … what does that even mean?”

  “Have you never had a lover before?” The sarcasm in her voice is very evident.

  “I think we both know the answer to that.” She gulps. “What I mean is how am I supposed to act like your lover? And why in the hell would you pay me sixty thousand dollars to do it?” Why would someone as hot as her need to pay for a “lover”?

  “Look, I’m going to keep this short and sweet. I am terminally ill. The doctors believe that I have a year at most to live — if I’m lucky. My mother seems to think I need to fall in love before that time comes to an end. I disagree, but I am not in the habit of disappointing my mother. So, I need to hire someone to play my “lover” and give her the dream she so desires — to believe her daughter fell in love before she died. Without any unnecessary hitches, and since real life doesn’t allow for that I am willing to pay for it.”

  I am speechless. She said it with little emotion. I stare at her in disbelief but her stance doesn’t change.

  “I’m sorry,” I whisper and then she does something that I least expect. She laughs. And it’s a beautiful laugh; it’s just a highly inappropriate time to laugh. “Did I miss something?” I ask.

  “Why do people always say that? If I had a dollar for every time someone said those words, I’d have at least ten of these penthouses.” She chuckles to herself.

  I’m clearly missing something here. I stare at her dumbfounded.

  “What are you talking about?” I ask.

  “The whole ‘I’m sorry’ statement. What does it even mean? Really?”

  I think for a minute. What does it mean? It’s just a way of showing that you acknowledge their pain.

  “I don’t know, it’s just what you say,” I say honestly. “It shows that you sympathize with the person’s pain, I guess.”

  “But I’m not in pain,” she states.

  “Emotional pain.”

  “I’m not in emotional pain either. What you’re doing is saying sorry because I’m dying.”

  I think about it for a second and realize she’s right.

  “Well, yeah I guess so. Death isn’t really fair,” I mumble thinking back to a darker time in my life.

  “See, that’s where people are so incredibly wrong. Death is not what you should be mad at. Death is more honest than anyone on this earth.” I look at her perplexed. When she notices, she clears it up. “Think about it, one thing in life is absolutely guaranteed to happen … you’re going to die. One day, in some way, you’ll die. You might not know when, how or where, but one thing you know is that you’re going to die. So, death isn’t some manipulative person that deceives you, because you’ve always known about it. It’s been honest in letting you know that one day it’s coming for you. So, why should we be mad at it?”

  “I have never thought about it that way.”

  “No, most people don’t, and that’s why they apologize. It’s stupid. I don’t want people to apologize for my death; I want them to talk about how freaking awesome my life is and, believe me, it’s been awesome.” She smiles and so do I. “So, back to the contract, are you in?”

  I take a moment to absorb everything she just said. I make a decision that I like this girl, and it’s not just because of her incredibly hot body and sexy face.

  “I think there are a few points that need to be raised first,” I say, cupping my hands under my chin.

  “Fire away,” she says with a smirk on her face. I like “smiling” Ned.

  I look at the top of the document and try to figure out what I want to ask first.

  “So, you’re going to pay me sixty thousand dollars to pretend to be your boyfriend for one whole year?” I clarify.

  “Correct. You will receive a payment of five thousand dollars into your bank account, every month for the next year, starting today.”

  “Sounds too good to be true,” I scoff.

  “Then it probably is,” she says with a sexy smirk on her face. I stare at her lips for a moment before regaining some control over myself.

  “Right,
so if I’m canceling plans and making myself available at all times, when do I get to live my life?”

  “The very fact that you’re here tells me you don’t have much of a life.” She’s brutally honest but she’s right. I move on to my next point.

  “If I’m right, not only do you want me to meet the people in your life but I’m expected to introduce you to all of the people in my life too? Why?”

  She takes a deep breath. “I can’t afford to cut corners or get this wrong. Everyone needs to believe we are madly in love otherwise this might not work.”

  “I thought this was just for your mother’s benefit.”

  “It is but I am a top jewelry designer and, unfortunately, that means I know a lot of people. As you know, often we can discover that the world is a very small place. If I cover every angle then there will be no room for any mistakes. It is very important to me that my mother has no reason to doubt this. If I’m careful then she will never know anything other than what I tell her.”

  She designs jewelry, must be pretty high end to afford this place. “Understandable.”

  “Yes,” she agrees.

  “Why will it be necessary for me to spend the night in your luxurious penthouse?” I smirk, looking around at my surroundings.

  “For appearances of course.” She rolls her eyes. “The longer we are ‘together’ there will be an expectation that we will at times share the same bed. You will, of course, be staying in the guest bedroom, don’t worry.”

  “If it helps appearances I can stay in yours,” I tease.

  “Do you have any other valid points, Mr. Cole?” We’ve gone formal again. I chuckle.

  “As a matter of fact, I do. I take it these sessions and meet-ups are like ‘getting to know each other’ classes?”

  “Correct.”

  “Ok, and why on earth would you want to change my appearance and name?”

  “I don’t want to change your appearance; that point was added before I met you.”

  I smile at her words. “So you are attracted to me then?” I say smugly.

  “My family will believe I am,” she states simply. I smile.

  “Same thing really.”

  She dismisses my comment. “And in regards to your name, I am not a fan of it. Shortening it doesn’t work for me since I don’t like the sound of Bren, and the only other thing I can shorten Brennan to is Nan. Now, I’m pretty sure you don’t want me to call you Nan.”

  No wonder she keeps calling me Mr. Cole.

  “You can call me Nan or Nanny, it sounds a little kinky.”

  “I have no desire to get kinky with you.”

  I let out a loud laugh.

  “You’re adorable.”

  “Can we move to the next point?” she says with another eye roll.

  “As you wish. So, just to be clear you’re going to call me Cole?”

  She nods.

  “Do you not think that might come off as a little strange around my family?” I laugh. Why am I talking about her being around my family? I don’t introduce girls to my family. Am I seriously considering signing into this crazy deal?

  “It might … maybe I can consider a pet name when we are around them.” She seems to be thinking hard.

  “This should be fun since I’ve never taken a girl back to meet them before.”

  Her head shoots up and her tough-girl exterior falters for a minute. “You haven’t? Do you think they’ll believe you?”

  “Babe, for five thousand dollars a month, I can make them believe I’m the president of the United States.”

  She laughs at this. I like it.

  “Good.” She breathes.

  “Ok, on to section three — my least favorite part. I’m good with not discussing the agreement with anyone other than you — I’m not even sure anyone would believe me anyway. I can stay in character, that’s a breeze. I’ll even refrain from using video equipment to shoot the sexy movie I was planning.” She scoffs. “But no alcohol, what kind of messed up rule is that?”

  “A sensible one.”

  “Elaborate?”

  “How often do you get drunk?” Too often.

  “Not often.”

  She rolls her eyes in disbelief. “And how often do you forget what happened the night before?” Pretty much every weekend. I can’t even remember what I did last night!

  “Rarely.”

  Once again she looks at me as if I’m a liar and she has every right to.

  “Well, I can’t risk you getting so drunk that you blurt out anything about our agreement especially if you forget you said it by the next day.” She has a point.

  “Not even just a little glass every now and then?”

  “Nope. If you refrain from it there is zero risk.”

  “Ok,” I agree even though I’m planning to drink anyway. “Now, a point I refuse to abide by is three point eight. The one that says I must not ‘Date, text, call, touch, kiss, grope or engage in any sexual contact/activity with any potential lover. Failure to do this will directly affect the authenticity of his role as ‘lover’.” I look into her eyes. “Please elaborate?”

  “You can’t date or have sex with any other women.”

  She says it as though it is the most obvious thing in the world.

  “Yeah but point three point six says I can’t have sex with you either so my point is, who the hell can I have sex with?”

  “No one.”

  “Yeah, that’s not going to work for me.”

  “I just told you that I know a lot of people. How is it going to look if one of those people were to see my so-called boyfriend taking a different girl back to his bed every night?”

  “It’s not every night just three or four.”

  “Oh, that’s just great.”

  “Look, you’re asking me to abstain from sex for a whole year, so either you’re crazy or you’re a virgin and have no idea what sex feels like.”

  “I’m neither. I’m dying, and I am trying to give my mom a little freaking hope before I leave this earth and she never sees me again. Imagine how heartbroken she’ll be if she thinks that the first man her daughter gave her heart to breaks it by sleeping around? Especially when she was the one who begged her to give love a chance!” Her face is red by the time she stops speaking and her eyes have glazed over.

  I take a deep breath. This thing means a lot to her. I don’t know why and I must be crazy, but I nod my head.

  She stares at me in confusion for a minute.

  “You mean you won’t have sex?”

  “Please don’t say it out loud, it’s too painful but yes I’ll agree to your little term if it makes you happy.”

  “Thank you,” she whispers after a few seconds of silence. She smiles at me, and for the first time since I walked into her penthouse, it seems genuine. That smile does something to the very pit of my stomach, but I push it away and move to the next point.

  “You actually put a point in the contract that ensures I don’t fall in love with you, seriously?” I chuckle.

  “It’s important,” she says simply.

  “Trust me, I don’t do love so there are no worries there but why on earth have you put it in? Don’t women love it when a guy falls in love with them? Isn’t that the ultimate goal of every little girl?”

  “No, it’s selfish.”

  “What?”

  “I’m dying, Cole, it would be selfish to allow someone to fall in love with me when I know that I probably won’t even be around in a year’s time.”

  I get it. I nod and move on.

  “You’d want me to be involved in your funeral?” I whisper.

  “For my mom, if you do she’ll believe you really loved me and it will put her heart at rest.”

  “But then you want me to just disappear?”

  “Yes, I can’t expect you to play the role for the rest of your life. She’ll just believe she was too much of a reminder of me. She’ll understand. I don’t want her to ever know that it wasn’t real even after I’m gon
e.”

  “Ok. So no one knows about any of this except us?”

  “And Misty.”

  “You trust her?” I ask.

  “With my life. And in the event of my early demise, she’ll ensure that you continue to get paid according to our agreement.”

  As much as I need the money, nothing about that sentence makes me feel good.

  “I know that I am asking a lot of you, so if you don’t want any part of it then I understand. You’ve signed the NDA so legally you cannot share this information with anyone. If you want out then now’s the time.”

  I stare into her eyes and behind the little act she has put on today I see so much pain.

  “Pen,” is the only word I say.

  I see the corner of her mouth twitch in amusement as she slides it across to me. We do the same ritual as earlier, both printing and signing our names in silence.

  “So, what now?” I ask once everything is in place.

  “I have another appointment. Leave all of your details with Misty, and I will contact you tomorrow,” she says as she stands up and walks toward the door. I’m not sure whether I’m supposed to follow her or wait for Misty to come and get me. I decide to stay seated.

  I pick up my glass of water and take a swig while watching her walk away. Just as her hand makes contact with the door handle, she pauses.

  “Cole?” I’m still getting used to being called that but it sounds good when it comes from her mouth.

  “Mmm hmm?”

  “Thank you.” Then she disappears without another word, and I realize that my life is about to change drastically.

  I spray myself with cologne before heading outside to the taxi that just pulled up outside of my apartment building. I swiftly avoid Larry’s door on my way down. I haven’t paid him yet, and I’m not in the mood for his drama. I used to think that having your landlord living in the same building was a good thing, and it was until I stopped paying my rent.