Grey's Awakening

by Cameron Dane

  “Watch your smart remarks, Sirus Allen Wilder.” Nia slipped into the voice used on Sirus and his brothers and sister when they used to misbehave out in public as children.

  “No matter how old you get, I will always be your mother. Remember your tone.”

  Kicking back in his chair, Sirus threw his hands into the air and rolled his eyes. “Oh, that’s just perfect, coming from you, after the performance you gave on the porch just a bit ago.” White heat filled Sirus’s body, completely washing away the cold. “Do you really expect to sit there with a straight face and lecture me about respect after the way you treated Grey today? Let’s just ignore for a moment that you were terribly rude to him, not to mention incredibly disrespectful to me in the process. Let’s instead focus on how you would have smacked me upside the head if I’d behaved the way you did with Grey. Only, because you refuse to acknowledge I’m even gay, and hope one day I’ll move past this ‘phase’, you think it’s okay to say or behave however you want, and that it doesn’t matter.” His throat tightened on the consequences of the words he spoke, but Sirus could not keep them contained a second longer. “Guess what, Mom? It’s not okay.

  You cannot keep doing this.”

  “Sweetheart,” reason filled his mother’s voice, “you are my son, and I want you to be happy.”

  Agh! Sirus wanted to pull out his hair. “That is not an answer.”

  “I just…” His mother glanced at her watch and then to her sheet of notes. “I don’t have a lot of time before I have to leave, and I have a dozen more things I want to share with you before I go. You’re really going to want to hear about Lorraine and Bobby.

  They—”

  Sirus snatched the list of gossip out from under his mother’s hand and flipped it over.

  “Understand me right now, Mom.” He looked his mother in the eyes, and his heart cracked, but he blinked and managed to keep the catch out of his voice. “You can go on talking about whatever you want, and I will listen because I love my family and want to hear about the latest things in their lives. But one day, and it might come sooner than you think,” God, please just open your arms to me right now, “I am going to meet someone who is as important to me as Dad is to you, and I will create a family with him. When that day happens, you are either going to have to accept that I’m gay, or we will drift apart and become estranged. I will not get family updates from you; I will get them from Dad. I won’t come to Thanksgiving, Christmas, or Easter, and when I go into DC, I’ll see everyone individually and stay at a hotel, rather than with you and Dad.

  “I don’t want to cut you out of my life, and it’s killing me to just consider it, but you have had better than ten years to get used to having a gay son. Either do it, or don’t.

  That’s up to you. But we won’t continue as we have been. Today really drove home for me that things have to change. Soon.” Sirus looked at his mother, his heart racing a million miles a second with the magnitude of what he’d just done. No taking it back now.

  Didn’t matter. It was long past due. He tried to smile, but with the tension coursing through him it didn’t quite form. “I just needed you to know that.”

  Nia didn’t say anything for the longest time. She blinked rapidly, and her hands trembled against the table. “Ahh, all right, where was I?” She flipped over her list, and punched a hole right in Sirus’s gut. “Oh, yes, Lorraine and Bobby…”

  His hand on his stomach, trying to control the bleeding, Sirus reeled, but listened to his mother share her news.

  “You’re fucking him, aren’t you,” John said. Grey could hear the smirk in his partner’s voice through the phone. “I would bet our firm that you are.”

  “You can’t do anything with our business without my signature, so you know you wouldn’t be able to make that bet.” Grey paced the length of his cabin, cell phone at his ear, unable to sit still or concentrate on work. He kept seeing Sirus, and he couldn’t let go of a nagging feeling that he should be with the man right now. He glanced at his watch.

  Five o’clock. Still two fucking hours until Sirus was supposed to come over. Damn it.

  This day had gone on forever. “Anyway, I just called to say hi and see if everything is going all right. Say hi to Kelsie for me; I’ll talk to you later.”

  A bark of laughter echoed in Grey’s ear. “Oh, now you’re being evasive,” John said, still chuckling. “You’re more than fucking Sirus. You like him. You’re sleeping with a guy you actually like, who is your equal in just about every way, I might add. Will wonders never cease?”

  Grey bit down the denial that would have made him a liar. “How in the hell are you figuring all that?” he said instead. Jesus. Grey wiped his brow. When the hell did it get so hot in here? “All I said was ‘his plumbing is fixed, and Sirus moved back to his cabin.’”

  “I’ve known you forever, man,” John answered, his voice sobering. “Do you think I can’t read you, even over the phone? Let me answer by asking you this: how did you know I was in love with Kelsie?”

  Rolling his eyes, Grey grinned at the memory of John’s attempts to hide his need to see and spend time with his best friend’s sister. “Easy. Everything gave you away.”

  “Right.” John’s voice gentled. “Asked and answered.”

  Grey’s pacing ground to a halt. Oh Christ. I don’t love Sirus. I don’t. I can’t. I just …

  want him with every fiber of my being. Care about him too. Right now, a twist in Grey’s gut that he’d been ignoring all day had him grabbing his jacket and heading out the door.

  “Grey?” John’s voice startled him back to reality. He’d already forgotten about everyone but Sirus. “Are you still there?”

  “Sorry.” Grey tore down the steps and tried to put his coat on at the same time.

  “Listen, I have to go. I’ll talk to you later.”

  “Drive safe,” John replied. “And tell Sirus I said hi. See you later.”

  Already in the car, Grey threw the phone on the passenger’s seat and gunned the engine to life.

  Knowing where to go this time, Grey followed the silence to Sirus’s workroom, his heart already hurting over not hearing the loud blare of eighties rock music. In one of their conversations since the afternoon Grey had found Sirus working to the sounds of Guns-N-Roses, Sirus admitted that he listened to all kinds of eighties music while creating his sculptures and other artwork. The lack of a song playing rang volumes louder than Welcome to the Jungle had done that first day.

  The shed doors were thrown wide open, and, as expected, Grey found Sirus working inside. Once again, he had his back turned, but this time he was still fully clothed. Sirus had a huge chunk of stone on the table before him, and he held a stone carving chisel in his hand, but he did not move. Instead, he stared to the side, clearly a thousand miles away.

  Grey rapped his knuckles against the doorframe. “Sirus?”

  Sirus jumped and spun, his eyes focusing as he found Grey. “Oh, hi.” The chisel fell out of his hand, clinking to the table. “What time is it?” Sirus pushed his sleeve up, didn’t have a watch on, and then glanced at the clock on the wall. “It’s early. Wasn’t I supposed to meet you at seven?”

  His chest constricting at the disorder he saw before him, Grey slowly moved inside the studio, toward Sirus. “I thought you might need a little company.” He made a few more tentative steps closer to his goal. “I wasn’t sure … you know … after your mother’s visit.”

  Sirus jerked, as if slapped, and Grey was on him in a shot.

  He wrapped Sirus up tight in his arms, and planted his chin on the man’s shoulder. “I am so sorry.” Grey didn’t need more than that one small reaction to know something rough had gone down after he left. He hugged Sirus to him even tighter, and pressed his lips high on Sirus’s cheek. “I’m sorry it didn’t go well.”

  Shaking, Sirus mumbled into Grey’s hair, “I don’t want to talk about it.” His lips brushed across Grey’s hair, over his temple and down his cheek, ending with
a desperate kiss to Grey’s mouth. “I don’t want to think about it.” He tilted Grey’s head back and made love to his lips. “I don’t want to know about it; not right now.” He bit, and his voice caught, tearing right through Grey. “I can’t.”

  “Okay. Shh, it’s okay.” Grey stroked the tense muscles bunching Sirus’s back. “I didn’t come here for that anyway.” He started dragging Sirus toward the door. “Not unless you want to talk.”

  “I don’t.” Sirus eyes were dry, but he could not hide the hurt and vulnerability living within. “Anything but that.”

  Grey had ached for something from this man, from practically the moment they set eyes on each other. In his dreams and while awake; all the time. His body still hungered for it today.

  “Take me to bed, Sirus.” Grey’s voice scratched like hell, but he finally said it out loud. “I want you to fuck me.”

  Chapter Fifteen

  Oh Christ, I did it. Grey buzzed inside and he felt a little unsteady. I really asked Sirus to fuck me.

  Sirus stumbled to a halt and grabbed Grey by the neck, forcing his face up. The little-boy-lost look disappeared from Sirus’s eyes, and wide, clear shock took its place. “What did you say?”

  “You heard me.” Grey slid his fingers up Sirus’s forearm and covered the hand Sirus had curled around his nape. He squeezed and moved closer until their bodies touched.

  “You called me on it a few days ago, but I didn’t want to know it. You were right, though. I want to feel someone inside me again.” He trembled saying the words. “And I want it to be you.”

  “Ohhh, God…” Sirus blew out an unsteady breath and his fingers clenched reflexively around Grey’s neck. “I didn’t think I’d ever hear you say that to me.”

  A frisson of panic raced through Grey, and words just started shooting out of his mouth. “Let me suck you off first.” Reaching between them, Grey worked the button and zipper on Sirus’s jeans, his nerves running the show. “Tasting you in my mouth makes me fantasize about having you in my ass.” He rubbed his hand down Sirus’s already thickening cock, and his mouth watered for more.

  Moaning, Sirus tore off his jacket and ripped open his shirt, revealing a line of dark, hard flesh that stopped at the white band of his underwear. “We could… Ahh, yeah, harder.” Sirus covered Grey’s hand and ground them both into his erection. “Just like that.” He let go of Grey’s neck and braced his hand on the doorframe. “Do you…” Sirus paused, hissing as Grey pulled his length out of the top of his underwear and teased the tip. Shaking his head, Sirus lifted his attention to Grey’s face, and gritted his teeth. “Hold on for a minute.” He stilled Grey’s hand, his eyes softening. “Do you want to go to the cabin first?”

  “No way.” Grey couldn’t tolerate slowing down or stopping now. He vibrated with need and couldn’t risk grinding his arousal to a halt. “I wanted to get your cock in my mouth the very first time I saw you working here without your shirt.” Grey peeled Sirus’s coat and shirt off his shoulders, revealing more beautiful muscle than should be legal. “Of course, that time,” he dipped down and tongued one of Sirus’s nipples, flicking the tip, “in my mind, I started with licking your back and worked my way down to your ass.”

  With that confession, Grey opened his mouth and bit into Sirus’s pectoral muscle, sinking his teeth in hard enough to sting.

  “Oh, yeah…” Sirus hissed and stumbled back into the wall, dragging Grey with him.

  He forced Grey’s face harder into his chest. “Do that again.” He speared his fingers into Grey’s hair and dug into Grey’s scalp as he bowed his back off the wall. “Leave your mark on me.”

  Emboldened, Grey’s cock raged in his jeans. He bore down on Sirus’s chest again, the act of biting arousing the hell out of him. Grey had never cared for biting as foreplay before, but with Sirus, he wanted to leave visible signs of aggression all over the man’s amazing body.

  Going for Sirus’s nipple, Grey latched on and sucked, pulling the slightly raised flesh into his mouth and licking it all over. The sharp, salty taste of sweat covered his tongue, spurring Grey to bigger sweeps over Sirus’s chest, across to his other nipple, where he attacked with incredible suction. Sirus held Grey’s head tightly and made throaty little murmurs of encouragement, urging Grey to bite and suck and nuzzle, all while rhythmically stabbing his erection into Grey’s stomach and leaving smears of precum on Grey’s shirt.

  Grey looked up at Sirus through half-closed lids as he kissed his way down the man’s flat, solid stomach. “Hold some of that excitement in till I get there.” He flicked his tongue into Sirus’s belly button, teasing the little indentation enough to make Sirus’s stomach quiver.

  With eyes shot full of silver, Sirus breathed heavily and looked half-drunk. “Take it quick.” He grabbed hold of his cock and held the rearing length out in offering. “I don’t know how much longer I can hold off coming.”

  Lowering himself to his knees, Grey’s entire mouth tingled at the huge, thickly veined penis jutting toward his face. The long slit held a pearly bead of seed, and Grey swore the entire beautiful length pulsed with a visible heartbeat. He swore it beat Greyson, Greyson, Greyson in time with Grey’s pounding heart. As Grey stared, mesmerized with wanting, the drop of precum grew and started to slide from the opening. Grey dipped his tongue out and caught it, teasing the saltiness of man over his taste buds as the tip of his tongue grazed Sirus’s slit.

  A tremor rocked through Sirus, and he pushed the head of his cock at the seam of Grey’s lips. “Please,” Sirus released his lock hold on Grey’s hair and folded his arms over his head against the wall, looking almost erotically angelic, “make me come in your mouth.”

  Undeniable longing and fire combusted inside Grey, his need for this man’s cock—

  well beyond the need for just any man’s cock—engulfed him in the flames, consuming him whole. He growled and opened up over Sirus’s straining erection, stuffing almost the entire length into his mouth in one wide push, his throat already naturally relaxing to take the extra size. Hot, throbbing cock took over every bit of space in Grey’s mouth; musky male smells invaded his nostrils and slipped into his bloodstream, and rough, needful noises from Sirus had Grey bobbing up and down the man’s burning thickness, voracious for every taste he could get.

  Grey shoved his hands between Sirus’s thighs and massaged his weighty, cum-filled balls, alternating between rolling and tugging on the lightly furred sac. Sirus groaned from above, his eyelids sliding closed as Grey tormented his sensitized member and testicles. Sirus squirmed as Grey sucked him down deep; he moved his backside so frantically he surely scraped his bare ass raw with every swipe of his buttocks against the rough plaster of the wall.

  Sirus’s inability to remain still or silent fed Grey’s desire to let everything loose with this man and scream “Bring it on,” in the face of the disastrous emotional consequences.

  Grey let go of Sirus’s balls and grabbed hold of his hips with both hands, sinking his fingers into the steely flesh hard enough to create bruises. The thought of leaving even more evidence of his presence on Sirus drew a growl of ownership up through Grey, and the tangible, audible need vibrated over Sirus’s cock buried deep in Grey’s mouth.

  “Oh yeah … yeah.” Sirus bucked his hips at Grey’s face, the power behind his thrusts nearly strong enough to dislodge Grey’s hold. “So … ahhhh,” he pounded his fists into the wall above his head, “fucking close.”

  Grey grew harder and harder with every open, visible response out of Sirus. His cock and ass pulsed with the need to come, but he ignored the desire to touch himself, caring only about the man before him. He went down on Sirus’s length again. As he did, he slid the flat of his tongue along the underside of Sirus’s cock and forced the top half against the roof of his mouth. Precum leaked out of Sirus and dripped near Grey’s throat, giving torturously wonderful hints of the flood trapped in Sirus’s balls. Grey got Sirus to the back of his mouth and then went right on going, pushing the m
ushroom head down his throat … and then a little bit more. When he could take no more, Grey swallowed. Once, twice…

  Sirus roared on the third swallow, his entire body locking straight. A split second later, he pulled back and took hold of his cock, pumping his saliva-covered prick with his fist as he spurted a load of seed all over Grey’s tongue. Grey held onto Sirus’s hips and kept his mouth open to take this man’s spunk, eagerly accepting every thick lines of bitter ejaculate Sirus gave to him and lapped it up like a dog getting its first taste of water in a week. Eventually, the last drop fell. After Grey swallowed it down, he wiggled the tip of his tongue into Sirus’s slit, making sure there was nothing left to drink. Sirus shivered, but he was sucked dry and not another drizzle of semen leaked out of his dwindling erection.

  All right, Cole. Do it now, before you chicken out.

  Grey looked at Sirus’s dick, still well above average, even without a raging hard-on.

  Gulping silently, Grey shot to his feet and backed up as he looked at Sirus—so fucking sexy—and then darted his focus away. “So, where do you want me?” Bumping into the center worktable, Grey recovered by hoisting himself up onto it. “Right here?” He pushed across the surface to the center and reached for his belt.

  Sirus stuffed himself back into his underwear and jeans, and moved across the room in two fast strides. He wrapped his hand around Grey’s ankle and dragged him back to the edge of the table. “I’m not fucking you on my studio table, baby.” Sirus flashed one of his quick smiles, and Grey didn’t know if his heart sped up for that or the endearment.

  Before Grey could decide, Sirus lifted him right off the table, holding them face to face.

  “At least, not the first time.” He pressed a ridiculously sweet kiss to Grey’s forehead that almost had him crying like an infant. “Now put your legs around me.” Sirus wrapped one arm around Grey’s back and slid the other down to hold his ass as he started to walk.