by Jordan Marie
I study the woman in front of me, and for the first time today, I find a ghost of a smile rising on my face.
“I’m planning on being in court. I don’t believe I’ll ever make it to Russia. I’m not much on flying in general, to be honest. I like having both feet on the ground.”
“They say flying is safer than driving.”
Of all the conversations I thought of having with my mother-in-law tonight, this wasn’t one of them. “Yeah, well, I’m the one driving, and I’m not putting my life in the hands of someone I don’t know in a car.”
“You may have more sense than I gave you credit for. Still, I wouldn’t let Lotus Petal know you’re afraid to get on a plane—”
“I didn’t say I was afraid, really.”
“Whatever. You don’t want to come off like a giant pussy. You already are fighting the blood you got running in your body. Don’t give her any other reason to leave you.”
“I would think you’d much rather her leave me way behind,” I tell her honestly.
“You’re growing on me,” she mutters.
“Damn…”
“Like a rash from an outbreak of poison oak,” she adds with a smirk.
“That sounds more like it,” I laugh.
“Especially if the rash gets between the butt cheeks so it chafes every time you walk.”
“I get the picture.”
“Or under the boob so it sweats and gets all smelly. Kind of reminding you of a pig pen…”
“And on that note, I’m out of here,” I mumble, turning away. The last thing I ever want to think about is Ida Sue and her smelly boobs.
“Hey, Luka?” she calls out softly.
I look over my shoulder at her. “Yeah?”
“Lotus Petal told me what happened. I reckon you have a lot going on in your head right now.”
“You could say that.”
“I never had sex with your father,” she whispers.
“You really don’t have to tell me that. It’s none of my business, Ida Sue.”
“Not willingly,” she adds.
It feels as if someone has sucker punched me in the gut.
“Fuck. Is that why you’ve always hated me? Why didn’t you press charges against him? Nail his ass to the wall?” I ask, but inside, it feels like I can’t breathe.
I know my father is unhinged… but could he be a rapist? I have so many questions, but I don’t say them out loud. Ida Sue doesn’t deserve that, and I’m starting to realize I never knew my father at all. The man I thought was my father would have never said those things to Petal, and he would have never had me arrested and tried to destroy my life.
“Come on, Luka. We both know how the judicial system works. Who is going to take my word over a man with your father’s background? A man who was already being groomed to run for office and have a long political career? I was already famous for free love rallies and being judged for the way I lived my life. It’s that life that made your father think I would willingly give in to him.”
I wish I could tell her she was wrong, but she’s not. We both know that, and my father had money. He would have buried her alive back then—maybe literally.
“This is why you never wanted me around Lo’. Why you hated me so much. You saw her as a kid another Parish was taking advantage of. You thought I…”
“My mind wasn’t exactly clear back then, Luka. I tend to react to things emotionally,” she admits, not looking at me. Instead, she looks down at the coffee cup she’s holding, and I’m suddenly glad the room is mostly dark. I don’t want to see the pain on Ida Sue’s face that I know must be there.
“I’ll just go check on Lo’ and River, and then I’ll leave,” I tell her, because there’s really not much more I can say. Suddenly my entire life has been turned upside-down, and things I thought were written in stone were just penciled in the sand. The heroes and the villains have all changed. I can’t even process it right now.
“When I’m wrong, Luka, I say I am. You need to stay here. Petal needs you, and so does that grandson of mine. Really, this is the safest place for you.”
“What are you saying?” I ask, thinking I know, but deeply shocked.
“Something I should have said years ago.” She sighs, putting her cup down and walking to me. “Welcome to the family, Luka.” She pats me on the shoulder. Then she keeps walking, but in true Ida Sue form, has to get the last word in. “But if you ever hurt my daughter, I will kick your balls so far up inside of you that you will be singing like Julie Andrews.”
“I—”
“Then I’ll bury your body so deep, Satan’s pitchfork will be playing with your ass for eternity. Understood?”
“Uh… understood,” I tell her, because damn if I know what else to say.
“Good enough,” she says, walking out of the room and leaving me staring after her, wondering just how much stranger my life can get.
43
Petal
Present:
“I can’t believe they postponed your trial for a freaking month! You have a life. You have a job as sheriff! You need this fixed!”
“Honey, calm down,” Luka says—and probably for the tenth time, because I keep repeating myself. I just can’t wrap my head around it. Luka’s father is getting everything he wants. Luka went to ask his mother for help, and she basically told him he was on his own and then left town for a long extended vacation in the Caribbean. Luka did not exactly hit the parent lottery.
“I can’t calm down! This is your life they are destroying, Luka.”
“They’re not doing anything. The way I see it, my father is doing me a favor.”
“You are freaking insane!” I argue. There’s no way he could possibly even think that.
“I’ve been saying that for years,” Mom mutters, but she says it with a wink at Luka.
“Lo’, all of this will get straightened out, and in the meantime… look at me.”
“What?” I ask, stopping because I fail to see why he should be happy and smiling.
“I’ve got my family back. I sleep with the woman I love every night, and I’m not singing like Julie Andrews,” he says, completely serious.
“Julie Andrews?” I ask, confused. “Luka, did you bump your head or something?”
“There’s still time,” Mom grumbles, adding to my confusion.
“What am I missing here?”
“Nothing. Just the fact that I’m growing on your mother.”
“Like a wart… a pus-filled wart,” she sighs.
“I think you’ve all lost your minds.”
“Well, to be fair, it’s not a long trip for any of us,” Black says, walking through the front door.
“I can amen that one,” Jansen says.
“What are you doing home, son?” Mom asks.
“It seems I’ve been put on administrative leave,” Black says, walking into the kitchen and grabbing a doughnut out of the open container we’ve all been munching on since we got back from court. River is in school, which is probably a good thing because I don’t want him to see how truly upset I am. Luka and I have been doing our best to keep things hidden from him whenever possible, and my family has tried to help with that. Still, he’s picking up things here and there—mostly at school from the other kids—and I know it’s affecting him.
“Administrative leave? What the hell for?” Blue yells, and that’s scary enough, because Blue never yells. Where Black is laidback, Blue is just reserved and quiet, preferring to stay to his own company most of the time.
“I have no idea. My supervisor said they had reports that I was violating ROP.”
“ROP?” Mom asks, confused.
“Rules of Procedure,” Luka explains quietly. “You think my father is behind it?”
“Since my captain and your father golf on the weekends, I’d lay odds on it, man.”
“Motherfucker. I’m sorry, Black. I can try—”
“You will not do one damned thing. It will get straightened out. I
want to see your father’s head on a platter as much as you do. My captain will get his head out of his ass eventually,” Black promises, but I have my doubts.
“I swear some men have to be conceived during anal sex. That’s the only reason for the explosion of assholes we keep coming across,” Mom says with a yawn.
“What are you going to do?” Blue asks.
“I filed a grievance with IAB.”
“I bet that’s going to make you really popular,” Luka sighs.
“Ask me how many fucks I have to give?” Black shrugs.
“I think it’s time I go and see a lawyer,” Mom grumbles.
“A lawyer? About what?” I ask Mom. I’m scared, but this was the one thing I was hoping she wouldn’t have to face.
“There’s more than one way to skin a cat, Lotus Petal,” Mom says with a sad smile.
“Mom, Luka’s father isn’t going to fight fair, and it could get really… bad.” I finish the last word lamely, knowing it doesn’t even begin to cover what the fallout could be if Luka’s dad turns his hate on my mother.
“I said there was more than one way to skin a cat, honey. Don’t matter which way you do it, though. It’s going to be a bloody mess.” She shrugs, leaving the room.
“Why do I have a bad feeling about this?” Black asks once Mom is gone and we’re all staring at the door she walked out of.
“Because you’re smart,” Jansen answers, sounding weary. “Still, some things need to be done, or they just sit inside us and fester.” Then he quietly gets up and follows my mom out of the room.
“Fuck,” Luka mutters.
I see my worry reflected on his face. “That about sums it up,” I agree, wishing I had a magic answer for all of us.
I don’t.
44
Luka
Present:
“Lo’, you’ve got to quit worrying. It’s going to go fine,” I answer into the phone.
“I should be there with you!” she whines, but she sounds horrible. River came home with a stomach virus a few days ago, and Petal managed to pick it up, too. I left her at her mother’s house this morning—in bed with a temperature of one hundred and two.
“There’s no point. It’s a set hearing, honey. The Commonwealth has suggested all charges be dropped if I agree to six months of probation and mandatory anger management classes. I’ll show up, agree, and then be home to feed you chicken soup for supper.”
“Ugh, Luka. Don’t mention food. It pisses me off that you’re agreeing to this stuff! You didn’t do anything wrong! We should be pressing charges against your father!”
“Lo’, I did hit him and threaten him. I can’t lie about that under oath, and I won’t. The way I look at it, if this gets rid of him and your mother doesn’t try to get involved, it’s worth it.”
“I still don’t like it,” she mumbles.
“Duly noted.” I laugh because she sounds like a child pouting. “I just pulled into our driveway. I’m going to go in and get changed into my suit and head out. I’ll be back soon.”
“Be careful, please? I don’t like you not having someone watching your back.” She sighs. “I can’t believe I got sick!”
“Will you stop worrying? We haven’t heard from my father in a month. There’s not much he can do, honey. It’s all finished now.”
“Tell that to Black. He still hasn’t been called back to work.”
“That’s because of the IAB investigation. The wheels of justice turn slow, Lo’—but they do turn,” I assure her, and for the most part, I believe it. I am becoming more than a little bit jaded about the system lately, however.
“Just watch your back. Please?”
“I’ll watch my back,” I promise her. “Besides, Ida Sue, Jansen, and Black are all going to meet me at the courthouse. It’s not like I’ll be alone.”
“Yeah, I know. I just wish I was going to be there,” she says with a sigh, disgusted.
“Just get better. It seems like forever since I’ve been inside you.”
“Trust me, Luka, I know. I miss you. I just… Mom’s house—you know?”
“Yeah, honey. I get it. That’s another thing that’s changing after the hearing today. We’re moving back home. I wanted to earlier, but your mother convinced me it would be safer to wait until the threat of jail was gone from over my head. She worried my father might try to pull something else.”
I push the key into the lock, and it doesn’t want to turn. I have to jiggle it a little bit to finally get it to work.
“And she was right. Ugh, I’ve got to go, Luka. Time for my every-fifteen-minute-run to the bathroom.”
“Too much information, Lo’. Damn, the romance is gone from our relationship.”
“It so is,” she cries mournfully.
“We’ll get it back,” I laugh. “Love you, Lo’.”
“Love you too, Luka,” she whispers before hanging up. I smile. I’ll never get tired of hearing that.
I hit the button on my phone and step into the house. I’ve missed this place. I can’t wait until finally Lo’ and I can move in here together and live with our son… the way we were always meant to be. It’s been a fucking long road, but I think I can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel. I reach up and turn on the light. The switch clicks, but the light doesn’t come on. The bulb must be blown. I walk into the bedroom wanting to hurry and get this done.
I just cross the threshold when I hear a sound behind me. I turn to see what it is, but before I can, something heavy comes crashing down on the side of my head. I fall down like a rock. There’s a ringing in my ears and everything is fading away, colors slowly leaking into grays and blacks. I’m going under, and I know I am. I try to force my eyes to focus, but the world is swimming in front of me.
“You shouldn’t have fucked with me.”
I hear the voice over me, but I can’t see who it is. I try to shake myself, to be able to defend myself. I think I see a flash of metal. Fuck. Is it someone I’ve arrested in the past? Are they going to kill me? Is that a gun? Is this how it ends?
Am I about to lose everything just when I finally have everything I’ve ever wanted?
All those questions bombard me at once. I wait for the gunshot, but it doesn’t come. Instead I feel something fall on my chest. The man kicks me and shoves me to my side, and I feel him fish in my back pocket for my billfold. Is he robbing me? Is that what this is about?
Then I know I’m done. Blackness begins to swallow me. I picture Petal’s face in my mind and allow it to take me—praying that I wake up.
45
Ida Sue
Present:
“What do you mean my son-in-law’s nowhere to be found?” I ask the lawyer again.
I don’t believe this shit. We’re all here for Luka’s court hearing—all but Luka himself. He was supposed to be here two hours ago. He’s yet to show. I didn’t get worried at first, but the more time that goes by, the more my anxiety does, too. There’s something going on here, and it’s definitely something I don’t like.
“Just what I said. The judge has sent cops out to Luka’s home to bring him in. They already went to your house. Cyan let them search, and he was nowhere to be found,” the lawyer explains, his beady little eyes giving me the creeps. I hate lawyers. I’ve never trusted any of them—even the one I hired to help me. Something about this guy sets off even more warning bells than normal, however.
“I already told you he wasn’t there. Christ! I swear the people in charge of this town all have shit for brains,” I complain.
I spend the next fifteen minutes doing my best to calm down Lotus Petal on the phone. I don’t really succeed, but I manage to keep her home for a little while longer. That’s a miracle in and of itself, but I think it has more to do with being glued to the toilet than my powers of persuasion. The doors to the courtroom open just as I’m starting to pace back and forth like a dog walking the fence and looking for a place to find freedom.
Cops come in, and my boy Blac
k is close behind them. There is no Luka, however. I watch as they march by me, going straight to the judge’s chambers.
“I’ll go see what’s going on,” Luka’s lawyer tells me, and I wish I held out hope it was good news. I don’t. I also have zero confidence that the snake in the grass that is supposed to be helping Luka will actually do so.
“What’s happening?” I ask Black when we’re finally alone. Jansen wraps his hands on each of my shoulders, standing close behind me for moral support. He’s a good man. I wish I could go back and have met him sooner.
“It’s not good, Mom,” he says, raking his hand across the side of his face in irritation.
“Well, I didn’t figure you were coming in here to spout horseshit and grow daisies. What’s going on?”
“Luka was nowhere to be found.”
“What’s that mean?”
“That’s just it. I don’t know. His closets were cleaned out. There were papers on the floor about closing out his bank accounts, and there were receipts for purchased plane tickets to Mexico.”
“You think he’s skipped out on bail?” Jansen asks.
“Bullshit,” I growl. “I’ve come to realize a few things over this past month, and by some miracle, Roger Parish’s blood didn’t destroy Luka. He seems to be a good man, and there’s no way he would just up and leave my daughter and their son. Not on some trumped-up charge that he would spend very little jail time for, even if he was found guilty.”
“I agree with you, but someone is trying very hard to make it look like he’s doing exactly that, and they’ve gone to a lot of trouble to do it,” Black says.
“His father,” Lotus Petal says, walking in and looking like one of those fucking zombies on that TV show that Cyan never misses.
“I thought I told you to keep your ass in bed!” I mutter.
“I was already in the car and driving when we were talking.”
“You look like fucking hell, sis,” Black says.