The Bad Book Affair: A Mobile Library Mystery

by Ian Sansom

  Israel had spent the afternoon tidying his coop, avoiding George, who had also been avoiding him, and he stood now—confused and chastened, but also at least a little cheered and chivvied by nature—and yanked at Pearce’s big chain doorbell, which rang, as big chain doorbells always ring, ominously.

  Pearce’s housekeeper, Joan, answered the door. She was not a woman who wasted her words; she was a woman who looked like she permed her own hair. Unwillingly.

  “Yes?” she said. Up until recently Israel had come every Sunday to see Pearce, and Joan had always greeted him with the same thin, suspicious “Yes?” as though anything more would be an invitation to unwonted intimacy.

  “I’m here to see Pearce,” he said.

  “He’s not well.”

  “Oh dear,” said Israel. “Shall I call back at a more convenient time?”

  “There’ll be no more convenient time,” said Joan, and she turned her back on Israel and made off through the house.

  Israel closed the big oak door behind him and hurried to catch up with her. The house, always huge, always echoing, but usually somehow full and present with energy, some how felt today as though it had been drained of life, like an abandoned theater, as though the theatrical impresario had already left, packing up in a hurry and moving on to his new home. It felt like Kane’s Xanadu: a vast, complex, empty puzzle.

  Usually on his Sunday visits Israel would sit in the drawing room with Pearce, who would insist on plying Israel with wine—“Into the old sluicery,” he would say, and into the old sluicery it would be, and “Don’t be such a silly prawn,” he would say, when Israel refused another glass, or “Tosh!” he would say to anything he disagreed with, which was most things—and he taught Israel how to open bottles of champagne with nutcrackers, and how to decant, and the difference between a good Lafite and a fine Latour and an acceptable Margaux. Pearce’s hand did not stint, nor in old age had his appetites wearied: just a couple of months ago, during one of their Sunday afternoon sessions, they’d polished off between them a nice half bottle of Sancerre, and a pinot noir from the Salgesch, and a pinot noir from Yvorne, all the while discussing the meaning of life, and art, and the pros and cons of the Futurist Manifesto, and the war in Iraq.

  Over time, the arrangement had become more formalized, and Israel would arrive and read from one of Pearce’s favorite books—Madame Bovary (“Incomparable!” Pearce would exclaim. “Sans pareil!”) or some George Eliot (“The best-looking English novelist”) or Dickens (“The great farceur!”)—and then they would drink and eat Madeira cake. They had become their own miniature literary salon, a twenty-nine-year-old-soon-to-be-thirty-year-old mobile librarian, and an eighty-two-year-old Anglo-Irish aesthete. Israel had found it a most curious and refreshing experience, reading out loud to Pearce, the complete opposite of reading out loud to the children at Tumdrum Primary, where the real challenge was keeping order and hanging on to his dignity. Reading to the elderly Pearce was for Israel like becoming a child again, being able to become absorbed and enfolded in a book. Israel found that, as he read, his mind would often wander in a kind of dreaming concentration, and he’d find himself somehow with Madame Bovary, romanticizing, or with Magwitch swimming with his heavy chains, or Maggie Tulliver cerebrating. It had something to do with the rhythm of the language: he would find himself breathing with the books.

  “The sound of an English voice,” Pearce would say when Israel read, and “Controversy,” he would say when Israel said “con-troversy.” “You’re not American, are you?” And “Canine,” he would say. “People do insist on calling it ‘cay-nine.’” It reminded Israel of being a child, when his father had told him stories—fairy tales and Irish legends, the story of Finn McCool, which is why he’d arrived in Ireland in the first place, he was sure, because of the fantasy of Irishness, and now he was living its reality. Pearce Pyper’s was an oasis.

  Sometimes when Israel was reading, Pearce would fall into a deep sleep and Israel would let the housekeeper know, and he’d creep out of the house and walk down the lane back to the Devines’ with a curious sense of peace and terrible sadness, the very feeling he’d associated with reading as a child, a sense of great possibilities and endless disappointments. Pearce had tried to insist on paying Israel for his time and trouble, but Israel had steadfastly refused. Reading out loud to Pearce was not a job; it was a joy. And then Pearce had hit upon the idea of paying him in kind.

  “What sort of a palate do you have?” he’d asked Israel one Sunday afternoon, after they’d drunk their sherry and eaten their slice of cake.

  “Erm.”

  “I’ve a Spanish palate myself, I’m afraid.”

  “Right,” said Israel.

  “I find the Italian reds and French very high in tannins.”

  “Ah. Yes. Uh-huh.”

  “So I have my supplier in London—Moreno, do you know them?”

  “Erm. No.”

  “Excellent. Been with them for years. I find you have to spend so much to get a good drinking claret these days.”

  “Right.”

  “Anyway. I have them send me mostly New World and Spanish. Which I hope you’ll be able to enjoy.”

  “Sorry?”

  “I doubt you’ll need more than a case a month, will you?”

  “A case of wine?”

  “I’ve taken the liberty of arranging it to be delivered to you at the Devines’. I do hope it’s convenient.”

  “A case of wine?”

  “Riojas, mostly. But some New World. As a small token of my—”

  “Oh, no, Pearce, I couldn’t possibly…”

  “You could, definitely,” said Pearce. “And you shall. No arguments, thank you!”

  “No. I couldn’t, really.”

  “Next chapter, please,” said Pearce, with a flourish of his arm from the chaise longue. “Where were we?”

  “Charles is about to perform the operation on the club-footed man.”

  “Ah!” said Pearce. “Quel dommage! Read on! Read on!”

  They were special times together.

  But things had changed.

  Pearce wasn’t in the drawing room today, and there was no wine and no craic. He was in the library, which was decorated in the Edwardian style, by Edwardians, with a stenciled frieze running around the tops of the shelves, and large, threadbare Persian rugs on the dark stained floorboards, heavy furniture highly polished, and windows draped with thick red velvet curtains. He lay stretched out on an old leather chaise longue by his writing desk, eyes closed, his hands folded on his lap, a black shawl draped around his shoulders. Even from a distance you could see that he wasn’t well, that something had gone wrong: his skin looked tight and luminous and pale, like a veil drawn across his face. He looked like a very sick and very weak Whistler’s mother; he had that peculiar childlike, otherworldly grace about him that only the very old acquire, as though life were just one long, wasting, harrowing journey back toward home. His eyes had sunk far into his face, but his hair had been cut short and neat, as though ready for an important occasion: a birthday, perhaps, or an anniversary.

  “He’s wandering,” whispered Joan as she ushered Israel into the library. “You have to be patient. And don’t let him give you anything,” she warned. “He’s giving people things at the moment.”

  “I see.”

  “If he gives you anything, just leave it behind when you go.”

  “Has he seen a doctor?”

  “Doctor’s been.”

  “And?”

  “Exhaustion. Flu. On top of everything else,” she said disapprovingly, adding, “He’s going to go into a home.”

  “No?” said Israel. “You’re not serious? You can’t make him leave here and—”

  “Yes,” said Joan. “We can.”

  “But…What about his family?”

  “There is no family.”

  “But to take Pearce from here would be…He’ll…And what if he gets better?”

  “He’s not going
to be getting any better now.”

  “Why? What do you mean? Isn’t he just—”

  “This is it now,” said Joan forcefully.

  “No. He’s fine,” protested Israel. “He’s just—”

  “He has vascular dementia,” said Joan.

  “Oh. Well.” Israel didn’t know what to say. “I knew he wasn’t…What is that?”

  “It’s like Alzheimer’s.”

  “Is it curable?”

  “No.”

  Israel and Joan stood facing each other at the door leading into the library.

  “Anyway, you’ll see for yourself,” said Joan.

  “Well, what about…” Israel was struggling to take it all in. “Is there no one else who could help look after him here?”

  “Are you volunteering?”

  “Erm.” Israel looked down at the floor. “Well. I’d like to be able to—”

  “He’s going to need specialist care.”

  “Have you told him?”

  Joan nodded.

  “And what did he say?”

  “What do you think? Go on in.” She nudged Israel forward.

  Israel walked quietly across the squeaky floor into the library. The room was full with the smell of beeswax, old books, and sickness. He could see Pearce’s chest steadily rising and falling. Before he’d reached him, and without opening his eyes, Pearce spoke.

  “How nice…” he began. And then he began coughing—low, dry coughs. “Nice of you to come,” he said. “I do apologize…for my…”

  Pearce’s voice was still there, but it was thin, as though he was speaking from another room. It was the voice of man at the edge of somewhere. He drooled slightly as he spoke.

  “Will you…” There were long, agonizing pauses between his words. “Have a drink?”

  “No, thanks,” said Israel. “Pearce, how are you?”

  “Fine. The Russian novel?”

  “Sorry?”

  “The Brothers Chestycough?”

  “Ah. Very good,” said Israel.

  “Just a…cold,” said Pearce.

  “That’s because you were out in the damp on Friday, playing your fiddle.”

  “Playing the fiddle?”

  “On Friday? Don’t you remember?”

  “Heifetz I met once.”

  “Yes I know. But—”

  “Where are we going?”

  “We’re not going anywhere, Pearce. I’ve come to visit you.”

  Israel glanced inquiringly across at Joan, who had settled herself on a battered chesterfield by the door; she cast her eyes up to the ceiling.

  “Would you like me to take your coat?” asked Pearce.

  “No thanks, I’m fine, really, thank you.”

  “If you are, so.” Pearce raised a withered hand and beckoned him closer. “You need to…Sit close.”

  Israel pulled a high-backed chair close.

  “Closer,” said Pearce. Israel glanced again at Joan, who nodded. He came and knelt by the chaise longue.

  Pearce was wearing a linen shirt buttoned all the way up to the neck, and a pair of black trousers, and canvas shoes with thick soles the color of a North Antrim beach. Up close, the skin on his face looked thin and papery; his beard was barely there.

  “I’m sorry…” he said. “Hard of hearing.”

  Israel tried to think of something to say.

  “I saw a hare on the way here, Pearce. I thought you’d be interested.”

  “A hare?”

  “Like a rabbit?”

  “Ah, yes,” said Pearce. “Lepus…” Israel could see Pearce’s mind working, struggling, trying to remember. “Timidus hibernicus,” he announced eventually. “Michael Longley.”

  “Sorry?”

  “Poem.”

  “I don’t know it, I’m afraid.”

  “Fine poem.”

  “Right.”

  “His father was in the same regiment as my uncle.”

  “Right.”

  “Ypres. The mud.”

  “Uh-huh.”

  “You never forget the mud.”

  “Right.”

  “Rats,” said Pearce, wearily. “But how are you?”

  Before Israel could answer, Pearce’s dogs, Picasso and Matisse, came in, made for Israel, and started enthusiastically licking his face and hands.

  “Are they being a nuisance?” asked Pearce.

  “No, no, not at all,” said Israel.

  “Good,” said Pearce, and then he whispered very quietly to Israel, his eyes suddenly filling with tears, “They say I’ve dementia, you know. I’ve heard them.”

  “I see,” said Israel.

  “Stuff and nonsense!” said Pearce. “They’re trying to cart me off.”

  “I’m sure that’s not—” began Israel, gently pushing the dogs away.

  “I’m staying right here!” Pearce said, suddenly much more loudly, so that Joan could hear. “Tell that bloody woman! I’m not going anywhere. In the end…Nowhere. Staying. Leonard…”

  “Leonard?” said Israel.

  “Leonard Bast.”

  “Right,” said Israel.

  “You know what I’m talking about?” said Pearce.

  “Yes,” lied Israel.

  “Here!” shouted Pearce, with all his might. The dogs barked in response.

  Israel looked over at Joan. She cast her eyes down, sadly.

  “Right here! Do you…understand!”

  “That’s OK, Pearce,” said Israel, soothingly. “I understand.”

  “You’re all alone, aren’t you?” asked Pearce, suddenly quiet again.

  Israel nodded.

  “No sign of marrying?”

  “No,” said Israel, “there’s…”

  “You’re young?”

  “I’m nearly thirty,” said Israel.

  Pearce gave a harsh, faint little laugh, as though in pain.

  “Alone,” said Pearce.

  “You still have plenty of friends,” said Israel.

  “No,” said Pearce gently. “Eventually…” His voice trailed off. “I wanted to ask you a question.”

  “Ask away,” said Israel.

  Pearce placed a hand on Israel’s arm. “The collection.”

  “The collection?” said Israel.

  “The books.”

  “Yes,” said Israel.

  “For the library,” said Pearce.

  “I’m sorry, I don’t understand,” said Israel.

  “I want the library,” said Pearce. “To have my books.”

  There was a long pause. Israel could see Pearce struggling to stay on track with the conversation.

  “Pearce?” prompted Israel.

  “They say England’s changed,” said Pearce.

  “Yes, I suppose it has.”

  “Ireland…”

  “Yes?” said Israel.

  “The Glens,” said Pearce, who seemed to be having conversations in his own mind. “We’re very lucky.”

  “Yes,” said Israel.

  “Glenn Patterson. The coast road,” said Pearce.

  “Yes,” said Israel.

  “Finer than the Grande Corniche. And Jim McKillop. Finest fiddle player in Ireland. Have you seen the Book of Kells?”

  “No,” said Israel.

  “You must see the Book of Kells! My brother is at Trinity, he’ll take you to see the Book of Kells. All the magic people.”

  Israel had no idea what he was talking about.

  “Comedy of…” began Pearce.

  “Errors?” said Israel.

  “Manners,” said Pearce. “Do you know how many words there are in a pencil?”

  “Sorry?”

  “Forty-five thousand.”

  “I’m not following you, Pearce, sorry.”

  “In a magazine. It said. Forty thousand words in a pencil.”

  “Doesn’t it depend on the size of the words?” said Israel.

  “Very good!” said Pearce, laughing hoarsely. “Very good! Oh, you’ll go far, young m
an, mark my words.” And then, “The books!” he said suddenly—“words” having apparently brought him back to the books. “Keep them together.”

  “Of course.”

  “I trust you with the books.”

  “I understand.”

  “All of the paperwork has been done.”

  “Good.”

  “And there’s a book I’d like you to have.”

  “No. No. I don’t need any books, Pearce.” Israel glanced nervously across at Joan.

  “I…insist.” Pearce reached out a hand and closed it around Israel’s wrist.

  “Very important. You know Dewey?”

  “No, I don’t think so,” said Israel.

  “Dewey. The…”

  “Oh, the classification system…”

  “Yes. Remind me. What are the…”

  Israel recited the Dewey decimal system to Pearce. “General works. Erm. Philosophy and psychology. Religion. Social sciences. Language. Science. Technology. Arts and recreation. Literature. History and geography.”

  “Philosophy,” said Pearce. “That’s it.”

  “Right.”

  “Go on then. Fetch! Fetch!”

  Israel got to his feet, followed by the dogs, who’d obviously taken the command to heart, and started making his way along the shelves, which were—loosely—arranged by the Dewey system. Halfway down the library he came to a halt and called back to Pearce, who had closed his eyes again.

  “I’ve found Philosophy, Pearce.”

  “J,” said Pearce, dreamily.

  “J?”

  “J.”

  “What am I looking for?”

  “Dr. Johnson. Rasselas. Do you know it?”

  “No, I don’t think I do.” Israel ran his finger along the shelf. “Got it!”