First Time in Forever

by Sarah Morgan

  “Wait a minute—” Emily put her fork down and focused on Alec. “I recognize you, now. You’re the Shipwreck Hunter. You made a documentary on the shipwrecks of Maine, and you kayaked the Colorado River with a geologist. I can’t remember what it was called. Adventures through Time or something. Did you see it, Sky?”

  Ryan smiled. “That’s the one that got him one-hundred-thousand female followers on Twitter. Or was that the one when you kayaked a section of the Amazon with your shirt off?”

  Alec didn’t smile, but fortunately Kirsti chose that moment to arrive, clearing plates and offering dessert menus, with a recommendation of warm blueberry pie.

  “Did you say blueberry pie?” Skylar sighed wistfully. “Kathleen made the best blueberry pie.”

  “In that case, you should order it, because it’s her recipe.” Kirsti caught a napkin before it could blow away in the breeze, and the same breeze picked up a strand of Skylar’s hair and blew it into Alec’s face.

  It wrapped itself around him like a golden tentacle, and he jerked away as if he’d been stung.

  “Oops, sorry.” Skylar scooped her hair over the opposite shoulder and gave Alec a conciliatory smile. “Breezy here. Let me buy you dessert to make up for that moment of unsolicited hair bondage.”

  The two of them stared at each other, cynic and beauty, violet blue locked with smoldering black.

  Feeling as if he were trespassing on an intimate moment, Ryan was about to speak when Alec stood up abruptly.

  “Not for me. I have work to do. I’m off to London at the end of the week.” He nodded to Emily. “Good to meet you.”

  To Skylar he said nothing, and Ryan watched as his friend walked out through the restaurant without a backward glance.

  Skylar handed the menu back to Kirsti. “I guess he hates dessert.” Her voice was calm, but Ryan could see she was upset.

  “He hates a lot of things right now. He’s going through a rough time. Bad divorce.”

  “We understand. It’s not a problem.” It was Emily who spoke, but Ryan noticed that she reached across and squeezed her friend’s hand, the bond between the two girls visible to the naked eye.

  Skylar gave a quick smile intended to indicate she was fine, and then stared out to sea.

  As Kirsti disappeared to the kitchen on a mission to find blueberry pie, Ryan tried to resurrect the conversation.

  “So, what are your plans for the afternoon?”

  It was Lizzy who answered. “We’re going to make jewelry.”

  For the first time Ryan noticed the pasta necklace around Lizzy’s neck. Each piece was painted a different shade of purple and pink and sprinkled with glitter.

  “Sounds like fun.”

  “Can we go on a boat trip?” The innocent question sent a ripple of tension around the table that Ryan detected but didn’t understand.

  In the end it was Skylar who spoke. “You’ll be too busy making jewelry for me to wear next time I visit.”

  Lizzy wasn’t so easily deterred. “I’d like to go on a boat and see the puffins.”

  “Boats rock and mess up your hair. Maybe we’ll go on it next time I’m here,” Skylar said quickly. “I’ll take you.”

  Lizzy looked at Emily. “Do boats make you sick?”

  “A little.” Emily’s face was as white as new snowfall, and Ryan knew beyond a shadow of a doubt there was a reason she kept her back to the water.

  They shared blueberry pie, and then Kirsti interrupted with a call for Ryan.

  He excused himself and walked through to his office, but Kirsti stopped him as he was about to close the door.

  “I think Skylar might be The One for Alec.” She spoke in a whisper so that whoever was on the phone couldn’t hear her.

  Ryan laughed. “You have to be kidding me. They almost killed each other.”

  “I know. I’ve never seen Alec like that. The chemistry was electric.”

  “She almost blacked his eye.”

  “Because he was rude to her and she wasn’t having it! Most people are daunted by Alec’s intellectual superiority. She squashed him like a bug.”

  “And that’s a good thing?” Baffled, Ryan shook his head. “Skylar isn’t his type.”

  “Ryan, how can such an intelligent guy be so clueless when it comes to relationships? She’s exactly his type. That’s why he was in such a filthy mood. He’s used to winning, and he didn’t win.” She turned away with an exasperated sigh, and Ryan stared after her, trying to picture brooding Alec with free-spirited Skylar.

  Exactly his type?

  He thought about Emily.

  She was responsible for a child, which meant she wasn’t his type at all.

  CHAPTER SIX

  “CALL ME. I want to know how you’re both doing.” Skylar pulled her case out of the car and took a last breath of sea air. “There are days when I think I could live here. It would be a simpler life. The air is fresh and the light is wonderful. I’d find myself a little studio by the sea where I could paint and make jewelry.”

  They were standing near the tiny runway, waiting for the Cessna 206 owned by Maine Island Air. The business was the lifeline for islanders needing rapid, easy access to the mainland. It delivered the mail, people and occasionally medical supplies.

  Today, Sky was the only passenger.

  “Just me and the mail,” she said cheerfully, leaning forward to hug Emily. “Ryan is hot by the way, and by hot I am talking weapons-grade sex appeal. And I’m willing to bet he doesn’t think your breasts are unfortunate. You really should use him to get over Boring Neil.”

  Emily didn’t mention that Ryan had suggested the same thing. Or that, for one crazy minute, she’d actually considered it. “My life is already complicated enough.”

  Sky checked to see that Lizzy was still safely in the car out of earshot. “Not all complications are bad. Ryan is the whole deal. Those shoulders. That smile. I wanted to crawl onto his lap and see if he’s as good a kisser as I think he’d be.”

  “So why didn’t you?”

  “Because he’s interested in you, and anyway, I’m with Richard.”

  “He isn’t interested in me. He’s a player, the sort who can’t let a woman walk past without making a move.”

  “Honey, he could hardly keep his hands off you at the lunch table. He almost burst a blood vessel holding back the caveman inside. You should think about it.” Sky spoke in a soft voice. “It’s time you went to bed with something other than a good book.”

  She had thought about it, and thinking about it had caused a thrill of excitement low in her belly. “Thinking about it is all I intend to do.”

  “At least you’ve thought about it. If you hadn’t admitted that, I would have phoned for medical help. Why aren’t you going to do anything about it?”

  “Because everything about this situation is unreal.”

  “He looked pretty real to me.”

  “I have to think of Lizzy.”

  “Having Lizzy doesn’t mean giving up sex. You can’t live in isolation, especially in a place like this. You need adult company. For what it’s worth, I like him. I think you can trust him.”

  “I hope so, since he knows the truth.” She’d told Sky what had happened. “Did Alec upset you?”

  “A little.” Skylar slid sunglasses onto her nose. “Personality clash. No biggie.”

  “I thought you and he seemed—”

  “What?”

  “Nothing. Ignore me.”

  “Like I said, I’m with Richard. And even if I wasn’t, I don’t have a thing for damaged men, and Alec Hunter is definitely damaged, not to mention rude.” Her friend stared into the distance. “Insanely good-looking, of course, but that’s not enough to compensate for his other deficiencies.”

  “Ryan mentioned that he’s coming out of a bad divorce.”

  “If yesterday was an indication of his usual level of charm, the surprise is that someone married him in the first place, not that they divorced him.”

  “H
e’s very successful. And he makes history accessible. I’ve watched him in a few different things. Type ‘Shipwreck Hunter’ into a search engine and you can find a video of him in action, kayaking the Colorado River. And last year he helped build and sail a Viking ship. Don’t you watch TV?”

  “Not much.” Skylar watched as the plane approached. “I wish I didn’t have to leave. I love this place. All I want to do is curl up here for the summer, walk on the cliffs and make jewelry, instead of which I have to smile and make polite small talk with people who bore me. My feet are going to be screaming by the weekend, and then we’re going to The Hamptons to see Richard’s family. Pity me.”

  “You’re staying with his family? Are you being vetted?”

  “I’ve already been vetted. Richard never wastes time dating anyone who doesn’t have the right credentials. Just in case the relationship goes somewhere. My bloodline has been studied along with anything in my past that might cause embarrassment.”

  It sounded so unlike free-spirited Skylar that Emily felt another ripple of concern. “Do you want the relationship to go somewhere?”

  “You know me. I think about the journey, not the destination. You can waste your whole life thinking about where you’re going, and then one day you wake up and realize you missed today because you were thinking about tomorrow. I like to live in the moment.”

  And yet Richard was the opposite of that. As far as Emily could see, he’d spent his life working toward a single destination, and everything he did was designed to turbo-boost him along that path. “What are you doing with him, Sky?”

  “When he isn’t focused on the future, he can be charming. And he genuinely wants to do good and change the world. He knows what he wants. He has a goal. That’s why he gets frustrated when things don’t go the way he wants them to, and people don’t feel the same way he does.”

  Emily felt another flicker of unease. “Be careful.” She didn’t know why she said it, except that something didn’t feel right. “And don’t forget I’m here if you need me.”

  “Hey, I’m the one supporting you.” Skylar watched as the plane executed a perfect landing. “One day they’ll arrange a direct flight to New York.”

  “Then this place would lose its charm.”

  “Maybe. I wish I’d bought one of those blueberry pies to take home. I could really—” Skylar’s jaw dropped as the pilot emerged from the plane. “Holy crap, is that—? Tell me I’m hallucinating.”

  Emily squinted into the sun. “You’re not hallucinating. It’s Zach.”

  “What the hell is he doing here? Do you think Brittany knows?”

  “I doubt it.”

  “Should we tell her?”

  Emily thought about it. “No. She’s in Crete. She’s happy. He might be gone by the time she gets back.”

  “You’re right. I can’t remember the last time she even mentioned her ex-husband. Did you know he was here?”

  “No. Last thing I heard, he was working as a pilot in Alaska. Should we kill him for her?”

  “No. It was years ago, and she wouldn’t want him to know he hurt her that badly.”

  “She hasn’t been serious about a man since.”

  “I know. Apparently ten days of marriage to him cured her of commitment forever.” Skylar stared at the man standing on the tarmac. Even from this distance there was no missing the power of his physique. He stood, legs spread, eyes hidden behind shades as he talked to an official. “It’s wrong that he should look so attractive. It distracts from the fact he’s a bastard. I hope he’s as good a pilot as that arrogant smile suggests, given that he’s going to be responsible for my life. How do I play this? Do I pretend I don’t know he broke Brittany’s heart?”

  “That’s probably best as he’s in charge of the aircraft. I don’t want him to dump you in the ocean.”

  “Good point. Instead of wanting to kill him, I’ll be grateful. After all, if he hadn’t acted the way he did, we never would have bonded that first night at college. Do you remember?”

  “Of course. I remember all of it.”

  “I remember Brittany sticking a photo of him on the wall so that we could draw on it. I gave him a nose ring and pink hair.” Skylar walked back to the car and hugged Lizzy. “See you soon, Tinker Bell. Make me a necklace. And make Emily throw out everything she owns that is black.”

  Emily watched her friend leave and then slid back into the car.

  She wondered briefly why Zach would be flying for Island Air, and then decided that as Brittany wasn’t here anyway, it didn’t matter. Neither of them stayed in the same place for long. He’d be gone long before Brittany returned.

  Keen to get home as fast as possible, she drove back along the coast road to Castaway Cottage. Today there was no blue sky, and the wind whipped the sea into a foaming, boiling cauldron, toying with boats and keeping swimmers out of the water. Surf crashed over the rocks, exploding in a burst of white froth.

  Emily kept her eyes on the road.

  If she worked really hard at it, she could just about pretend the sea wasn’t there.

  Two decades had passed, but she could still remember the moment when the water had closed over her head and dragged her down, hungry for an innocent victim.

  Sweat formed on her brow.

  Pulling up outside the cottage, she saw that Lizzy had fallen asleep.

  Absolved of responsibility for a brief, blissful moment, she closed her eyes.

  Only when the child slept did she manage to shake off the tension.

  *

  OUT IN THE BAY, Ryan made use of that wind as he hauled the sail and turned the boat. “So, your charm with women is something I aspire to emulate.”

  Alec ducked under the boom. “I wasn’t trying to charm anyone.”

  “That’s good to know.” But he could tell that his friend’s black mood had lifted and was glad he’d suggested making the most of the wind and the tide.

  Work could wait until darkness fell over the water.

  In the meantime, he was going to make the most of living next to some of the best sailing waters on the planet.

  Penobscot Bay was peppered with hundreds of small uninhabited islands, many with secluded anchorages. A few of the larger islands, like Puffin, had working harbors and communities that swelled to ten times the size during the summer months.

  They sailed along the coast, past beautiful old estates of weathered clapboard and wooded enclaves, rocky coves where forest met the sea, inlets, harbors and fishing villages dependent on lobstering and commercial fishing. Ducks and gulls bobbed on the surface of the water, and in the distance he could see the ferry making one of its three times a day trips back to the mainland.

  With the wind in their sails, they sped across the water to Fisherman’s Creek, past rocky outcrops, nesting birds and seal colonies, finally returning to the island as the sun set.

  Ryan pulled his hat low over his eyes as they approached the harbor. “So, what did you think of her?”

  “She should come with a warning. Marry this woman and your investments could go down as well as up.”

  “I was talking about Emily.”

  “Oh,” Alec shrugged. “She looked tense. Jumpy. And she has a kid. Kids mean responsibility. Never mess with a single mother. There is never any question of a casual relationship. They’re testing you out to see if you’re marriage material.”

  Ryan decided not to disclose Lizzy’s parentage. Not because he didn’t trust Alec, but because he respected Emily too much to reveal her secrets. “Did you notice she sat with her back to the water?”

  “She had no choice. You picked a table that wasn’t big enough for five. I notice you squashed yourself next to her.”

  “She picked the same seat the day before, and the table was plenty big enough.”

  “What are you saying? That she doesn’t like water?”

  “I don’t know what I’m saying, but there’s something there.” Ryan gauged the distance and guided the yacht skillfully again
st the dock.

  “You’re showing a lot of interest in her.”

  “Just being supportive. That’s what we islanders do.”

  “How supportive? Are you planning on tucking her in and kissing her good-night?”

  Ryan thought about it. “I might, except I have a feeling I wouldn’t be welcome.”

  “Women always welcome you.”

  “I think there’s more to her than meets the eye.”

  “There’s more to every woman than meets the eye.” Alec sprang off the boat. “That’s the problem.”

  *

  RESPONSIBILITY SHARED THE bed with her and kept her awake.

  She’d locked the doors and checked the windows, but still the endless possibility for risk swirled through Emily’s brain, tormenting her. Next to her, Lizzy slept deeply, curled under the pretty patchwork quilt, her arms clutching the bear.

  It was a sight to soften the hardest heart, except that Emily had locked hers away years before and had no idea how to access it. And she didn’t want to.

  Numb, she closed her eyes and rolled over, but still sleep stayed just out of her reach.

  She thought about Ryan, about the way his fingers had felt brushing over hers, the way he’d looked at her with that intense focus that caused the world around them to melt away. Her relationship with Neil had been comfortable and nonthreatening. He’d done nothing to disturb her equilibrium or threaten her sense of safety.

  Ryan did both. He made her feel things she’d never felt before. But she had no intention of allowing herself to explore those feelings in greater depth.

  She knew she had issues with attachment, and she was perfectly fine with that.

  For all his sophisticated charm, Ryan Cooper represented danger. The kind of danger she was keen to avoid.

  She finally succumbed to exhaustion as dawn sent sunlight pouring through the window and then woke later, much later, knowing she’d slept too long. The sun beamed strong rays through the glass, adding a warm glow to the white and muted blues of the bedroom.