Freaky Hearts

by Amanda M. Lee

  I snorted. “I don’t like being the alpha female,” I argued, turning the corner that led to the western boundary. “I don’t need to be the one and only anything. I … .” I broke off when I recognized the small group waiting for us. Naida and Nixie excitedly chatted with one another as Raven ran her hand up and down Kade’s arm, her mouth moving a mile a minute as he listened and occasionally nodded. Four faces turned in our direction simultaneously and Raven’s smile was smug when she caught sight of me.

  “There you are,” she said, straightening. “I was beginning to think you got lost.”

  “We were walking the perimeter.” I forced my voice to remain even as I met Kade’s curious gaze. “Luke and Nellie were explaining why polygamy is the way to go, and I got a little distracted.”

  Raven narrowed her eyes. “Polygamy? That seems to be all anyone can talk about ever since we hit Utah. I mean … I get it. But that’s not the normal practice here. It hasn’t been for a long time. People take offense when you bring it up.”

  “Do you see people?” Nellie challenged, glancing around. “I see us. There are no people here to offend.”

  “We’re people,” Nixie pointed out.

  Nellie ignored her. He often enjoys a rowdy argument with Raven. She is easy to rile and Nellie isn’t opposed to picking low-hanging fruit. “Now, unlike Poet – who needs to be the alpha dog – I think Raven would thrive in a polygamous relationship.”

  Recognizing the game for what it was, Luke perked up. “Oh, really? I never considered that. She clearly has second wife written all over her now that you mention it.”

  “Exactly.” Nellie bobbed his head. “She couldn’t be first wife because she’s prone to dramatic fits and stabbing people in the back. First wife garners too much power and attention. She would have to be second wife to fly under the radar.”

  Raven scowled as she lobbed poison-tipped eye daggers in my direction. “Did you put them up to this? I bet you did. You’ve done nothing but mope since Kade dumped you for me. Get over it.”

  I swallowed hard. It didn’t surprise me that Raven said the words. Heck, she probably believed them. Of course, there was always the possibility that Kade told Raven about our fight, maybe even owned up to his birthright. He would need someone to talk to, and he didn’t have many choices after alienating himself from Max, Luke and me.

  “We should probably put up the dreamcatcher,” I said, my voice hoarse as I fought to maintain control of my emotions. “It’s dark enough to hide the magic, and I’m tired after a long day of traveling.”

  “You can run away all you want, but I know exactly what you’re thinking.” Raven was smug as she shot me a knowing smile. “You’re upset because you lost him. I don’t blame you. I would be upset if I were in your position, too. Unfortunately for you … I’m not in your position.” As if to prove her point, Raven pressed her hands to Kade’s well-muscled chest. “I’m in a much better position.”

  Kade was many things – including angry – but he clearly had no intention of being used as some sort of prize in a magical female showdown. He took a step away from Raven and fixed her with a dark look. “I don’t know what position you think you’re in, but I can guarantee things aren’t what you seem to believe.”

  I knew it wasn’t a step toward forgiving me, yet I couldn’t help but internally crow. Perhaps Kade hadn’t fallen for Raven’s act after all.

  “I was just telling her where she stands,” Raven hedged, her eyes uncertain as she searched Kade’s face. “I was under the impression you two weren’t together any longer.”

  “We’re not together.” Kade’s words dashed the small flash of hope I let worm its way into my heart. “You and I aren’t together either. I’m not with anyone by choice. You and I have been over this.”

  Raven faltered. “But … .”

  Kade shook his head, annoyed. “Put up the dreamcatcher,” he barked, taking a further step from Raven. He risked a glance at me, his expression unreadable. “We need to make sure this place is safe before going to sleep. It’s a new environment.”

  “We’re doing that right now,” I offered hollowly.

  “Great.” Kade’s tone was icy. “That’s one less thing for me to worry about, right?”

  “I’ll take care of it before it gets too dark.”

  “At least I can trust you to do that. Whew! What a relief.”

  I ignored the sarcasm and focused on Nixie and Naida. “Let’s do this. I’m exhausted and want to go to bed.”

  Nellie patted my arm, seemingly in solidarity, and shot me a sympathetic smile. “That’s another thing polygamy would be good for. If someone isn’t in the mood … just hop further down the list.”

  “You’re kind of a pig,” I groused, shaking my head. “Who even thinks of things like that?”

  “Oh, please. My wives love me. I’m king of my castle.”

  4

  Four

  I didn’t sleep well.

  For some reason, even though we’d shared a bed for only a few weeks (and it never led to any funny business, much to Luke’s chagrin) I found I missed Kade’s presence when I dreamed. He snored lightly, not so loud that it woke me from a dead slumber, but in a reassuring and friendly manner. His heartbeat was always steady, and I could hear it echoing in my ear when I rested my head on his chest.

  His absence shouldn’t have bothered me nearly as much as it did. We hadn’t spent enough time together for me to remake my life around him. And yet … I felt off. The life I’d built for myself didn’t quite seem to fit. It wasn’t just that I missed Kade. I missed Max, too. He’d been avoiding me since he dropped the bomb and Kade shut both of us out of his life.

  I took a cold shower to get my blood pumping, and by the time I hit my miniscule front porch I had a little color in my cheeks. I opted to eschew makeup. I wasn’t trying to impress anyone, and I would have to cake on the stuff when the carnival opened. I had a reputation to uphold, after all. The show must go on. Even when you don’t feel like performing, you have no choice but to perform.

  Nixie and Naida were in charge of breakfast, and I thanked Naida when she shoved a plate in front of my face. I told myself I wasn’t hungry even though my stomach growled in anticipation of the eggs and hash browns. I forced a smile when Luke took the seat next to me and offered Melissa Craft – our newest recruit and my “sort of” apprentice – a forced grimace as she chatted with Nellie across the table. She absentmindedly waved, but she didn’t know me well enough to sense my unease.

  Luke handed me a mug of coffee – which I desperately needed – and I worked overtime to go through the motions so I could fake being in a good mood. Um, well, “good mood” was a bit of a stretch. I at least wanted to look stable.

  “How are things?” Luke asked, his eyes contemplative as they scanned my face.

  “I’m fine.” I knew it was the wrong thing to say the second the words left my mouth.

  “Yes, you’re fine,” Luke intoned, rolling his eyes. “You’re pretty far from fine, Poet. You’re extremely pale. Do you want to talk about it?”

  Luke is usually the guy who would rather joke himself to death than deal with anything serious, so his muted manner jolted me.

  “Luke, you don’t have to spend all of your time worrying about me,” I said. “I’m an adult. I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself.”

  “On a normal day I’d agree with you. This isn’t a normal day. It’s not a normal week. You’re struggling. There’s no shame in that.”

  I felt the exact opposite. I was desperately ashamed of my actions. Moping in this manner wasn’t my style, yet I couldn’t stop myself. “Luke, I’m just … tired.”

  “Haven’t you been sleeping?”

  That was a sticky question. “I slept some.” I averted my gaze as I sipped my coffee.

  “Some,” Luke echoed, shaking his head. “I love you, girl, but you generally sleep a solid nine hours a night. What is ‘some?’ Is that two hours? Three?”


  “Let it go,” I warned, grabbing my plastic fork and focusing on my breakfast. The last thing I wanted was eggs and hash browns, but I was in no mood to cook for myself. “There’s no reason to get worked up. I slept. I’m well-rested. I’m bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. That’s a saying, right?”

  “A lame one.” Luke made an exaggerated face as he blew out a sigh. “I think we need to come up with something to brighten your spirits. How about a makeover? I’ll bet Brigham City has a spa. We should find out. We could both use a day of pampering.”

  I made a face that must’ve been fairly hilarious because Luke managed a legitimate smile. “We have jobs to do,” I reminded him. “We don’t have time for the spa.”

  “Bite your tongue.” Luke wagged his finger to quiet me. “We always have time for the spa. Come on, Poet. Doesn’t an afternoon of getting rubbed and waxed sound like just what the doctor ordered?”

  “Not really.”

  “You’re no fun.” Luke rolled his neck until it cracked, shooting Percival Prentiss a dark look when the man took the open seat to my right. “Oh, look who it is. The clown is here.”

  Percival ignored the dig and focused on me. “Hello, Poet. How are you this fine and bright summer morning?”

  Most women would go weak in the knees at his accent. I could practically see Buckingham Palace when he opened his mouth, because his voice was so posh and sophisticated. His body wasn’t bad either, which is something you don’t associate with British men, but it was something of a bonus in Percival’s case. Sure, the fact that he enjoys dressing as a clown is hard to swallow because, well, clowns are creepy. He was a nice overall package, though, once you shoved the floppy shoes and horns out of your head. Except for one thing, of course.

  “Why do you bother with the fake accent?” I asked, eyeing him over the brim of my coffee mug. “We know it’s not real. You let it slip when the scarecrow monster attacked in Nebraska. You’re not fooling anyone.”

  “Yeah, what’s up with that?” Luke asked, narrowing his eyes to suspicious slits. He’d already disliked Percival before the accent revelation. He’d been downright nasty to the man ever since Percival’s true colors … and tongue … had come out to play during a tense situation.

  “I’m sure I have no idea what you mean.” Percival purposely picked a clipped tone as he met Luke’s heated gaze. “My accent comes and goes given my time in the States, but it’s hardly unheard of for a man to adopt the cadence and tone of a new country when he spends so much time abroad.”

  What a load of hogwash. “Dude, we know you’re not British,” I supplied, shaking my head at Percival’s pronounced frown. “I don’t know why you insist on pretending that we didn’t hear what we heard that day, but we’re not idiots.”

  “I would never suggest anything of the sort. In fact, I think you’re the loveliest female specimen I’ve had the pleasure of spending time with in quite some time.”

  I rolled my eyes at the clumsy flirting.

  “And yet you keep talking in that fake accent,” Luke pointed out. “That’s not a turn-on. It’s pretentious and off-putting. Seriously, dude, what’s up with that?”

  Percival ignored the question and focused on me. “Right, so, I thought perhaps we could spend the day together. Maybe take a walk through the field over there, pick some flowers, frolic. It’s a beautiful day.”

  I lifted an eyebrow. Frolic? As far as invitations go, it was certainly the strangest one offered to me in quite some time. “I’m good,” I said after a beat. “I have work to do. It’s a setup up day and, well, we have a lot to set up.”

  “Uh-huh.” Percival enthusiastically bobbed his head. “I was thinking we could work together. You know, side by side. Now that you’re no longer entranced by the security constable I was thinking we could get to know one another better.”

  Even if I wasn’t pining for Kade – yes, I admit that’s what I’m doing even though it pains me to do so – I wouldn’t want to spend time with Percival. The guy was off … and that was before you took into consideration the fact that he dressed as a clown. That pushed him over the edge from off to downright weird. “I have work to do,” I said. “I don’t plan to be entranced with anyone for the foreseeable future. That includes you.”

  Percival looked upset with the news. “But … .”

  “You’re a clown, man,” Luke interjected. “She’s not going to date a clown. It’s weird. When you add the fake accent and her bruised heart to the mix, you don’t stand a chance.”

  “My accent is perfectly real.”

  The fact that Percival could say that with a straight face was almost dumbfounding. “Yes, well, you keep telling yourself that. Perhaps one day we’ll all forget what we heard in the tent when the scarecrow attacked. Until then … .”

  “Until then, what?” Percival’s eyes darkened. He focused on me for several beats before floating his attention to a spot over my left shoulder. I shifted to see what caught his attention, my heart lodging in my throat as Kade descended the steps of Raven’s trailer.

  It was early. It wasn’t even eight yet. If Kade was already in Raven’s trailer that must mean he’d spent the night there. There could be no other explanation.

  “Yes, well, it seems Mr. Denton is entranced by someone new,” Percival noted. “Where did we land on our afternoon together again?”

  I glared at him. The smug way he carried himself made me want to punch him in the mouth. Luke grabbed my hand and loaned me a bit of his steadying influence while also offering a headshake to dissuade me from my thoughts.

  “I have an idea,” Luke announced. “If you don’t want to go to a spa – which I still recommend, by the way – how about we go someplace else?”

  “Where?” I gritted out, my cheeks coloring when Kade turned and met my gaze. Raven looked haughty when she linked her arm with his. Kade glanced at her, something unsaid passing between them, but I forced my eyes away because I didn’t want to be caught staring when he looked back.

  “We’ll go on a short road trip,” Luke offered, shaking his head as he glared at Kade and Raven. Despite all of his words to the contrary – everything he said about Kade needing time to think things through – he remained firmly entrenched on my side of the ever-widening gulf. “It will be fun. Trust me.”

  THE GREAT Salt Lake wasn’t what I expected. I’d been to plenty of lakes – some better than others, mind you – and thought I knew what I was getting myself into when Luke suggested a beach afternoon with the pixie twins, leaving Melissa behind for the initial set-up for my tent.

  I was wrong. The Great Salt Lake was like nothing I’d seen before.

  “How did you know about this beach?” I struggled to keep the wonder in check as I scanned the horizon, a beautiful ridge of mountains reaching high into the sky on one side and a sandy beach stretching as far as the eye could see on the other. “You knew exactly where to go.”

  Luke shrugged, his smile so wide it almost swallowed his entire face. “I’m gifted.”

  “You’re certainly gifted.” Naida was excited when she glanced around the empty beach. “Why are we the only ones here?”

  “Believe it or not, I read a few forums online and found that a lot of Utah residents aren’t big lake swimmers in this area,” Luke replied, stripping off his shirt and dropping it on the blanket Nixie had spread to make us comfortable. “This lake is extremely salty, so I guess Utahans – is that a word? – prefer swimming in pools.”

  “That’s interesting,” I mused, keeping my voice low as I flipped off my sandals and flexed my toes in the sand. “It’s not like normal beach sand.”

  “What’s it like?” Nixie was curious as she dropped to her knees and ran the sand through her fingers. “Huh. You’re right. It’s more like the kind of sand you’d find by a river, although it smells extremely salty.”

  “Or a Michigan lake even,” I supplied, my mind briefly traveling back to happier childhood memories. I quickly shook myself out of my reverie – fixating o
n something I couldn’t change wouldn’t do me any good – and flashed a smile as Naida bounded toward the expansive lake. She had no inhibitions and happily sloshed through the water before diving in. Nixie giggled as she followed, eliciting a genuine smile.

  “You look happier,” Luke said, moving to my side and following the twins with his eyes. “Are you happier?”

  My stomach twisted at the worry etched on his handsome features. Luke isn’t a worrier by nature. He’s gregarious and enthusiastic on every level. I didn’t want to take that quality from him simply because I was in a funk.

  “You don’t have to worry about me, Luke. I’m fully capable of taking care of myself.”

  “That’s not what I asked.”

  “I’m … much happier,” I lied, digging my toes into the sand and forcing a bright smile. “I’m completely over everything that happened.”

  “Poet, you don’t need to be over everything that happened,” Luke chided. “You don’t need to lie to me. I see the truth etched on your face … and I don’t like it. You’re hurting. You can admit it.”

  That seemed unlikely. “I’m fine. Kade and I were never really together. We never defined what we meant to one another. His business is … his business. I’ve moved on.”

  “You haven’t moved on. He hasn’t either. You’re in a holding pattern. Nothing is over.”

  Part of me wanted to believe that. Part of me thought it would be easier to move on now, say my goodbyes, and take myself out of the running. I refused to compete with Raven. I wasn’t a high schooler, after all. This wasn’t a popularity contest. “I’m not sure how I saw things going, but I think at least a small part of me always knew this was how they’d end up.” I reached out and squeezed Luke’s hand. “It’s okay. I’ll try not to be so morose. I know that wears on you.”

  Luke cast me a sidelong look, making a clucking sound as he shook his head. “You don’t see the big picture. You will eventually, but you can’t see it yet.”

  I opted to indulge him. “And what’s the big picture?”