Share No Secrets

by Carlene Thompson

  “No. Nothing like that. Actually … well, I gave him the impression I wanted to leave Philip. I don’t know what got into me. I was just so angry, so hurt—”

  “So needy, as always,” Rachel snapped.

  “Yes. Lucas and I were together several times and then I told him I’d made a mistake. I knew I’d hurt him, but I just couldn’t leave Philip. The problem was that I realized too late. I was pregnant”

  Rachel looked at her mother contemptuously. “You’d already deceived Dad by committing adultery. Couldn’t you pass me off as his child, too? Or were you too honorable?”

  “No,” Vicky said weakly. “I wasn’t honorable even then. I told him I was pregnant I said, ‘Isn’t it wonderful? We’re going to have a child!’ And he gave me this cold, stony look and said, ‘I’m sterile. I’ve known for years.’ He didn’t get furious, he didn’t ask who the father was, he didn’t show one trace of emotion. He just walked out of the house. He came back two days later and said, ‘We’re going to pretend this baby is mine. I don’t want you to tell your mother, your sister, anybody that it isn’t And I don’t want to know who the father is. End of subject.'” Vicky laughed raggedly. “End of subject! Can you believe it? I couldn’t.”

  “But you did what he said.” Rachel looked at Philip. “Why, Dad? Or should I say Philip? Why did you play out this act? And don’t lie to me now, not after all you’ve put me through. Tell me the truth or I will put a bullet in your head.”

  Philip barely paused before saying in a stiff, dry voice, “I had planned a career in politics since I was a child. I couldn’t expect to further my aims by divorcing my pregnant wife. There would have been a scandal. It would have been the end.”

  “Not if there hadn’t been a child at all,” Rachel said. “If you were determined not to divorce Mom, why didn’t you insist she get an abortion? She would have done what you wanted, no matter how she felt about getting rid of an unborn child.”

  “Abortion has always been abhorrent to me.”

  “Since when?” Rachel asked disdainfully. “As I recall, you’ve always been pro-choice, although as a stalwart Republican you never broadcast your views on that subject”

  Another pause before Philip said, “Considering abortion in the abstract is different than the reality of your own wife having one. I did not want to put your mother through it.”

  Rachel’s eyes narrowed and a sardonic smile formed on her face. “You’re very convincing when you lie to the public, Dad, but not to me. I can tell when you’re lying. Now, because I intend to keep everyone in this room until questions are answered to my satisfaction, why don’t you try telling the truth?”

  The silence in the room seemed to swell until Adrienne thought she would scream. Didn’t Philip realize that Rachel was on the edge, capable of anything, even of shooting him? Why wouldn’t he answer? What would happen if he refused to answer? She closed her eyes and felt Drew’s grip on her hand tighten. She clung to his hand as if he were the only thing in the world that could save all of them. Including Skye.

  “Answer her, Philip,” Drew finally said, his voice steely. “If you don’t answer and keep putting all these people at risk, I swear I’ll choke you to death before Rachel has a chance to shoot you.”

  “Shut up, Delaney,” Philip said, seething. “This is none of your business.”

  “Answer her!” Lucas commanded.

  Philip looked at him with naked hatred. “You son of a bitch. I gave you a job. I was good to you. I had no idea—”

  “It doesn’t matter now,” Lucas said coldly. “Just tell Rachel what she wants to know.”

  Adrienne could feel Philip breathing hard behind her. He’d probably never felt so cornered and powerless in his whole life. “All right, Rachel. If you want the truth, you’ll get it. I’m not going into specifics, but when I was fourteen, I got an injury. A very private injury inflicted by none other than Great-aunt Octavia. I’d broken a Ming vase. It wasn’t the first time she’d beaten me with her cane, but it was the worst. I never said anything about it, or about any of the other beatings, because I was ashamed of what an old woman could do to me. I also had nowhere else to go. My parents were dead. There were no other close relatives. She filled my head with stories about the horrors of foster homes and orphanages.” His head tipped down slightly. Adrienne wasn’t sure, but she thought she saw a look of remembered terror on his face. But in a moment he looked up again, his face expressionless. “Later, when the pain in my groin wouldn’t go away, I got worried and went to the doctor. I made an excuse for the injury. He wanted to test me, and I let him. That’s when I discovered I was sterile.”

  His reverence for the imperious, cruel-eyed Octavia had always mystified Adrienne. Now she realized that what Philip had felt wasn’t reverence—it was fear. And he’d been in the old harridan’s care since he was six.

  “I was ashamed of being sterile,” he went on. “I kept hoping some miracle would happen. But after your mother and I had been married for three years, she still wasn’t pregnant So I knew it was true. And I also knew that other people would begin wondering what the problem was. They might think Vicky was barren, but what if they suspected the problem lay with me? What if they thought I wasn’t a man?”

  Good God, Adrienne thought. Octavia must have planted that idea in his mind. She must have made him doubt his manliness and proving it had become an obsession with him.

  “So when Vicky told me she was pregnant, I knew the baby wasn’t mine. My first impulse was to get rid of it But I went away and thought about it for a couple of days. And I decided that this was the way to save my reputation. People would think there was nothing wrong with me. After all, I had a child, didn’t I? My marriage would stay intact and I would have a child. I’d be the perfect political candidate—the man with a spotless reputation. A family man.”

  Rachel looked at him incredulously. “You accepted me because you thought it was good for your career?”

  “Yes,” Philip said simply. “It made perfect sense.”

  “Dear Lord,” Vicky whispered. “Even I didn’t know your true reason for wanting to keep the baby. Without one, you were afraid people would think you weren’t a real man, a virile man?”

  “Well, you didn’t think it was because I cared about the kid, did you?” Philip asked viciously.

  “I thought you really didn’t want to put me through an abortion because you knew I hated the idea. And I thought you could come to love the baby,” Vicky said weakly.

  “Love? Her?” Philip almost snorted. “Every time I looked at her, I thought of what you’d done. You had me, Philip Hamilton, and you still turned to another man. I didn’t know it was Lucas, but I knew it had to be someone inferior to me.” Or superior, Adrienne mused, because he could father a child. “And then came the most galling part of all,” Philip went on. “Watching another man’s child grow into something special. Beautiful. Intelligent. Someone who excelled at almost everything. Music. Tennis.” He laughed harshly. “Even that damned rifle team she was on for a while.”

  The rifle team, Adrienne thought. She’d forgotten all about how worried Vicky had been that Rachel would get hurt handling the guns. But she’d been a champion. A champion who had shot at Lucas and at her at Lottie’s cabin. A champion who could have killed both of them if she’d really wanted to.

  “Daddy,” Rachel said pathetically, “I tried to excel at everything because of you. I thought if I could just make you proud enough of me, you’d finally love me.”

  “Love you?” Philip scoffed. “You killed Claude and Margaret and, worst of all, Julianna. Julianna was the only person in my whole life that I loved!” Vicky swayed as if she were going to faint, but Philip didn’t even glance at her. “You tried to kill Gavin Kirkwood, didn’t you? I remember that call you got from Bruce right before you went tearing out of the house, then claimed you’d had a fender-bender and your car was in the shop. It was Bruce calling you to say he’d gotten some information out of Kirkwood, wasn�
��t it? Information you thought might hurt you. And where the hell is Bruce, anyway? Have you dispatched him, too?” “No … I—”

  “I don’t care!” Philip screamed at her. “I was right about you all along, right not to love you because you were a mistake of nature. You are despicable! You are an abomination!”

  “No, Daddy, please …” Rachel sobbed.

  “I-am-not-your-father,” Philip spat. “Thank God I am not your father because I will hate you to the depths of my soul until the day I die!”

  “Philip!” Vicky cried, but he went on ranting at the girl who stood before him, shaking, crying, seeming to crumble right in front of them.

  Lucas stepped forward. “Rachel, don’t listen to him,” he pleaded. “You are not an abomination. You’re a beautiful, talented girl who is troubled. We’ll get help for you. I’ll get help for you. I am your father, not Philip Hamilton. And I love you, no matter what. I won’t let anything happen to you.”

  Shaking violently, Rachel looked at him wildly. “Get help for me? Like what? I’ve killed people. You all know it I’ll be put in prison for the rest of my life. I’m not a juvenile. I’ll get the death penalty! The electric chair!”

  “No,” Lucas said desperately. “There are other ways this can be handled.”

  “A mental institution. You’ll put me in a crazy house and I’ll live there until I rot. Well, I won’t do it! I’d rather die. I will die! It’s the only way. But I’ll do it on my terms!”

  Rachel raised her pistol and shot at the ceiling. Everyone recoiled and she took advantage of their temporary shock to dash past them, out of the room and down the hall. Lucas was the first to move, tearing along behind her as she ran to the stairs. The stairs leading upward. Drew followed Lucas as Adrienne went to Skye, stooping and trying to scoop the girl into her arms. But Skye fought her off. “She’s gonna kill herself, Mom!” she shrieked, then with amazing speed stood and ran out of the room. Stunned, Adrienne struggled to her feet as Vicky too ran from the room. Philip stood perfectly still, his expression vacant, as Adrienne pushed past him and followed the others.

  She could hear Lucas yelling for Rachel to stop. She could hear Skye crying, calling to Rachel that she loved her. She could hear Drew shouting for Lucas to catch Rachel and get the gun away from her, as if Lucas weren’t already trying his best to catch up with a fleet young woman over twenty years his junior. But Vicky was silent except for her rasping breath.

  To Adrienne, the trip up the stairs seemed to take an hour. The hotel had become a nightmare full of shouts and yells and shrieks and people running frantically after her niece who carried a gun. They bypassed the third floor and stumbled up the stairs to the fourth. Adrienne and Vicky had just reached the top when they saw Rachel near the end or the hall. An outside light shone brightly through the great, arched floor-to-ceiling window and for a moment, Rachel stood several feet in front of it, bathed in light, a beautiful, tragic girl who only hours ago had seemed to have a wonderful life ahead of her. She turned, looked at her mother, and said, “Tell Daddy good-bye for me.”

  Vicky screamed at the top of her voice as Rachel ran toward the window. She was fast and strong, and the glass crashed into countless pieces as she hurled herself against the old, thin panes. Lucas sank to his knees, his face contorted in silent horror when his daughter landed with a body-shattering thud on the concrete walkway below.

  EPILOGUE

  “It’s only late August, but I’m sure I can smell autumn in the air,” Kit said.

  She, Adrienne, Drew, and Brandon sat in the gazebo at The Iron Gate. At eleven A.M., a cloudless sapphire-blue sky hung over them and a warm breeze wafted through the gazebo, a breeze rife with subtle smells that sent Brandon’s nose twitching furiously. Looking at him, Drew said, “I wonder if cats have as many olfactory glands as dogs.”

  Kit laughed. “I have no idea, but speaking of cats, I really miss Calypso. I never wanted a pet, but I got used to her after just a few days. I didn’t tell Lottie that when I took Calypso home, though. I know Lottie and she’d want to give me the cat, but she needs Calypso for company more than I do right now.”

  “At least Lottie’s safe. And unnecessarily apologetic for the shooting incident at her cabin. After all, she didn’t tell me where she was, but she did tell me absolutely not to look for her.” Adrienne sipped her mimosa, feeling relaxed and almost decadent Skye was at Sherry’s for the day. With Sherry’s help, and that of the good-looking Joel on whom Skye had developed a crush, she slowly seemed to be emerging from the depths of depression over her cousin’s death five weeks ago. “I’m surprised poor Lottie didn’t die hiding out in the woods for days. Instead, she came through it with only a case of bronchitis.”

  “I told you she was tough” Drew said, smiling. “You’ll probably turn out just like her.”

  “Living in a cabin by myself in the woods and having visions?” Adrienne asked in mock horror.

  “Tough and wily,” Drew corrected.

  “I don’t feel tough and wily. I feel like one big, dumb bruise. I can only imagine how Vicky feels, but she refused to let me go to Canada with her. She said if I was along, we’d just talk about Rachel and she wouldn’t even begin to heal. She thought she needed time alone.”

  “And where is the ex-gubernatorial candidate?” Kit asked. “I know he fled town right after he made an obligatory appearance at Rachel’s funeral.”

  “He’s touring Europe,” Adrienne said. “In his public statement he made a big deal about being unable to stay in the town where his ‘darling though troubled daughter’ had met her death, but he’s really just hiding.”

  Drew scoffed. “Hiding from the Allards, no doubt. They want to sue him for the pain and suffering his daughter caused dear Bruce.”

  “He’s alive, isn’t he?” Adrienne asked sarcastically.

  “But she shot him in the leg. He might walk with a limp.”

  “Which will no doubt affect him drastically when he takes over his father’s businesses, including the newspaper.” Adrienne grinned at Drew. “Just think of it. Someday Bruce will be your boss.”

  “That is the day I resign as editor and begin work on the Great American Novel.”

  “It’s too bad Miles didn’t fare as well as Bruce,” Kit said sadly. “But at least he’ll live, although his recovery will take months.”

  Adrienne didn’t know what to say. She now knew Kit had loved Miles and she always would. Maybe someday Miles would turn to Kit, but the shadow of Julianna would always hang over them.

  “But there’s one bright note,” Kit said suddenly. “Gavin’s near death scared my mother into realizing how much she still cares for him. They’re like teenage lovebirds. It’s almost sickening, except that I’m glad to see Mother so happy. I didn’t realize how much her depression affected me. Even considering all the awful things that have happened lately, not having to worry about her constantly has made my life easier.”

  Brandon raised his head and barked. They all looked around to see Lucas Flynn walking by. He smiled, raised his hand in greeting, then continued along the sidewalk. He looked tall and handsome in his uniform, but even at this distance, Adrienne had seen the sadness in his gray eyes.

  “That must have been awkward,” Kit murmured.

  Adrienne shook her head. “Actually, it wasn’t. We had a long talk after Rachel’s death.” She looked at Drew. “I haven’t even told you all the things he said, but I think the time has come.”

  She reached out and took his hand. “Lucas always knew Rachel was his child, but Vicky didn’t want him, so he went away. He never stopped thinking about Vicky or Rachel, though, so he came to Point Pleasant to be near them. He had no hope of Vicky leaving Philip for him, or even of her telling Rachel the truth about her father. He just wanted to be part of their lives.”

  Adrienne smiled regretfully. “That’s where I came in. We met and really liked each other. In fact, he came to love Skye and me. Not in the way he loved Vicky and Rachel, but in a warm,
caring way. And Skye and I were alone. He thought he could help us, provide us with a more secure life. But his real reason for wanting to be part of our lives was because we were part of Vicky’s and Rachel’s. He didn’t fully realize it at the time, but that’s what he wanted—to be close to the romantic love of his life and his daughter.”

  Drew’s dark eyes gazed into hers, full of understanding. And love, Adrienne thought joyfully. At one time, Drew may have been selfish and careless, but almost twenty years had changed him. He was truly a man, now. A man full of generosity and capable of genuine love, both for her and for Skye.

  “I’m sorry about Lucas,” Kit said gently. “I know you cared about him.”

  “I still care,” Adrienne said. “But I’m not in love with him and he wasn’t really in love with me. He’ll always be a part of my life and Skye’s—I wouldn’t want it any other way and Drew understands—but there’s only one man for me.”

  Kit smiled. “No disrespect to Trey Reynolds, Adrienne, but there always has been one man for you.”

  Drew leaned over and kissed Adrienne, a gentle yet passionate kiss that didn’t embarrass her one bit even though her mother had always told her public displays of affection were vulgar. Then Drew leaned back, his smile growing even wider. “Hey, kid, we forgot why we came here this morning!”

  “I thought it was because you couldn’t bear to go another day without seeing me!” Kit joked.

  “Well, there’s that, but there’s also something else,” Adrienne said. “Come out to van.”

  “The van?” Kit echoed. “When did you get a van?”

  “I rented it for a special purpose,” Adrienne said. “It’s the red one at the curb.”

  “It’s the only van at the curb,” Kit said. She looked down at Brandon asleep on her feet. “I hate to disturb your much-needed rest, but let’s see what Adrienne has hidden in that rented vehicle.”

  They walked out to the van and Drew opened the rear doors, then looked at Kit. “I’m afraid I’ll need someone to help me unload this, so for now you’ll have to step into the van in order to view the surprise.”