Corn, Cows, and the Apocalypse (Part 1)

by Felicia Jedlicka

  Since no one and everyone was rich now, the status no longer mattered, but you could still tell who came from money and who didn’t—usually by the number of double negatives they used. The most appealing thing about the intriguing stranger was his relaxed “I’m just watching the game with my friends-leg up on the rail” pose.

  His head turned to scan the crowd, and I could see the determination in his face. He was searching for something or someone. I smiled wishing that that someone could be me. I was almost entirely sure by this point that I was totally high. I’m such a light weight.

  His gaze stopped…on me. I giggled covering my mouth. I looked behind me to see if I was completely misinterpreting his perspective. When I turned back he pointed at me, indicating, “yes, you.” I yelped and sunk in my chair.

  “What are you doing?” Devin said leaning over to me.

  “I think I’m flirting.” I busted out with laughter. Yes, definitely high.

  Devin scanned the crowd, but Blonde Ken had looked away from me. Damn.

  “What is wrong with you?” He asked. I could see August’s disapproving look on my right, so I turned to speak just so Devin could hear.

  “I think I’m high.” His face clambered with concern, amusement, confusion, and even a little anger, but he settled on amused disapproval before wrapping his arm around me. I glanced back at Blonde Ken. As if on cue he turned to me and blew me a kiss. I beamed and buried my head in Devin’s shoulder. What the hell was I doing?

  -Hip Hip Hurray!-

  My pot buzz left as quickly as it came, but the roar of the crowd and Devin’s untamable enthusiasm kept me going long after. A beer in one hand and a hot dog in the other I cheered and jeered with the rest of them. I was never much of a sports fan, but live theater yes, and this was life or death theater.

  When Haden stepped up for the scoring challenge, I couldn’t help but scoot to the edge of my seat. I wanted to press my hands together to pray for a good outcome, but even as my hands started to move, August took my hand in hers squeezing it hard, like she also needed to do something with her hands. I couldn’t help but smile when I saw she had the same antsy expression on her face.

  Haden cracked her neck and stared down the arena at the paneled corral stalls that held grim instead of cattle. As I understood it, her gun held 15 shots. She had used up one on the first round with a dead on shot to the head, which meant she had fourteen left to shoot at the ten grim about to be released. If she missed on any shot she would have a disadvantage in the final round.

  The faster she shot, the better the score, the more accurate the shot—head, heart—the better the score. Misses were deductions, as were leg and arm shots, since they weren’t usually enough to stop a grim. Not to mention the sharp shooters weren’t taking protective shots until her entire clip was empty.

  The horn blew and I watched Haden concentrate on her first five distance shots. She ignored the three fast runners that were barreling right at her and took out the slow ones. I gripped August’s hand hard.

  “Why is she doing that? She needs to get the fast ones.” I said nearly lifting off my seat to yell at her.

  “She knows what she’s doing.” August said confidently even though she was squeezing my hand even harder.

  She took down two more that were veering off to find closer prey. A nervous handler waved happily after she shot an approaching grim. I was practically kneeling I was so far off my chair. I couldn’t even think beyond, please.

  Haden’s approaching three angled into her from their previous starting points. They were like the three angry stooges about to pounce on her in quick succession. At the last nail biting second, she side stepped and shot the first one.

  Her sidestep brought the approaching grim from an angled sequential attack to a straight line with her aim. The first grim’s head shattered like glass. The second shattered almost simultaneously. By the third the bullet had slowed, but his face cracked and fell to the ground losing a good quarter of his noggin on impact. She had killed three birds with one stone.

  It took a millisecond for the crowd to realize what she had done and we all erupted. I screamed louder than I thought possible jumping up with August’s hand still in mine. When I realized I had nearly yanked her arm off, I let her go and hugged her. I turned back to Devin and he scooped me up and twirled me, wooing all the way.

  He gave me a wet kiss that I knew was really intended for Haden, but since I was the only one there, he made do. When he put me back down, we both screamed our hearts out at Haden and waved frantically to get her attention.

  When Haden looked up us, she gave us a reserved nod, but I knew she was holding her smile at bay. She no doubt wanted to celebrate as much as we were, but since she hadn’t officially won yet, it would have been tactless to do so. Devin blew her kisses, and I did the same, even though she rolled her eyes at me.

  I wiped away the joyful tears that were creeping down my cheeks. August noticed and put her arm around me. “What’s wrong?” She furrowed her brow.

  I shook my head and shrugged. “I’m just so happy.”

  “You’re proud of her.” She said more than asked.

  “That’s so stupid, I know.”

  “Why is that stupid?” August asked tugging on my shoulder.

  “She’s the second side kick. Me being proud of her is like a student being proud of her teacher.”

  “Pride when bestowed on others is simply a compliment to the action and a measure of love for the recipient.” I looked up at her. “It has nothing to do with rank.” I was about to respond with a joke to lighten the sensei talk, but I was rendered mute by the sudden presence of Mr. Blonde Ken doll standing behind August.

  “Excuse me,” his voice thrummed like a bass guitar. “Is she with you?” He pointed to Haden.

  August pulled me back toward my seat before releasing me. She turned to face the man, pointedly putting herself between us. “Who’s asking?”

  Mr. Blonde looked chagrined, but he smiled warmly despite the insult of her immediate distrust. “My apologies, my name is Adrian Dorn.” He reached out his hand to shake August’s but she crossed her arms. I was surprised she was being so rude. I peeked over her shoulder and Mr. Blonde…err… Adrian smiled at me. “Hello.”

  “I’m Lenore, this is August…” I threw my hand out beside August to shake his still outstretched hand, but August slapped it away and Devin pulled me back. I glared at him, but he gave me a stern look that told me I needed to let August handle this.

  “Good to meet you Lenore, August.” Adrian bowed as if we were in the middle of a Jane Austin book. “I am the director of the games. I merely wanted to congratulate you on your friend’s success. I’ve never seen anything like it.”

  “She loves guns.” I said without thinking. Devin squeezed my elbow and pulled me against him—a not so understated request for me to shut up. He wrapped his arm across my chest like a shield. His overprotective side was turning territorial. It seemed unnecessary, but then again, I had already been punched, drugged, and almost raped by lesbian scangers, so…I really needed to just shut-up.

  “I can see that,” Adrian smiled.

  “Is there something more you wish to convey Mr. Dorn?” August said with well-disguised contempt. “I find it hard to believe that you came all this way to congratulate her victory.”

  “It was hardly a hike, my dear.” Adrian revealed a little of his annoyance, but quickly corrected his tone. “However, I did want to offer you better seats for the final round. Your friend is no doubt unbeatable at this point, but you would have a better view for her final presentation in one of our box seats.”

  “We see rather well from here.” August said flatly.

  “Please, I must insist. The mayor himself insisted I make the offer. If he sees you haven’t taken the seats, it would be insulting to his offer.” August glanced over at the box seats where the mayor was sitting. I could see him nod and applaud us like we should be honored just to be associated with H
aden. August sighed. She couldn’t in good conscious turn down such a compliment from the mayor. Some social niceties still needed to remain intact.

  “Where are the seats?”

  “I’ll escort you.” He led the way to our box seats which were spitting distance to the contestants, and their targets. Haden was still making rounds, and eyed our sudden change of view and the man escorting us to it.

  Why was everyone so suspicious?

  Adrian stopped at the start of the front row in the box and offered August leave to take the first seat. She glanced back at Devin as she did. There was apparently some secret sidekick language that I had yet to be taught. Devin placed a hand on my shoulder as I came by Adrian. It wasn’t so much like he was claiming me as property, but like he had every intention of pulling me back if Adrian suddenly exploded.

  “Lenore,” Adrian drawled as I passed by and I tried not to smile, but he was so 1980’s soap opera star cute. “Am I mistaken, or were you the one I caught ogling me earlier.”

  I chuckled glancing at Haden. She was shaking her head ever so slightly to whatever silent question Devin had asked her. “I’m not sure women ogle so much as window shop, but yes, that was me. I’m sorry for the spectacle I’m a little out of sorts. Tonight has proved to be a rollercoaster of emotions.”

  “I can see that.” He nodded pointing to his own eye to refer back to mine which by now was an unhealthy black and blue. “Everything all right?” He glanced surreptitiously at August like he was accusing her of being my abuser. Perhaps in a very roundabout way that was true, but I found the suggestion of needing protection from my own heroine impertinent.

  “No, I’m fine.” I looked to August who was still watching our conversation like it was a test of my loyalty. “Thank you for the seats.”

  “It was the mayor’s request. I’m just the errand boy.” He said humbly.

  “Well, convey our gratitude. We didn’t mean to insult you. We just aren’t used to openhandedness in the new world.”

  “Isn’t that the truth?” He raised his brow sympathetically, implying that he had dealt with a good deal of cruelty. “Well, I’ll leave you to it. It was nice meeting you.” He held up his hand to shake. I got the feeling that I shouldn’t have taken it, but it was automatic.

  He smiled warmly as he gripped my hand. It should have been fireworks and electrical attraction, but it wasn’t. It was just the opposite, repellant. The desire to be free of his hand was foreign and only comparable to the desire to keep your feet off the floor at night so the monster under your bed doesn’t get you.

  I smiled back trying to hide my discomfort as any polite person might. He lifted my hand to kiss it. I couldn’t bare that. I was already trying to crawl out of my own skin. At the last second I ripped my hand away. The feeling of a depraved axe murderer chasing me left immediately.

  “I’m so sorry,” I sputtered. Adrian’s eyes cooled to my indiscretion. I might as well have thrown a drink in his face. “My hands are so filthy. Have you seen the bathrooms in this place?” I grimaced playing the fool to my own charade. “I couldn’t possibly put your lips through that.” I looked over his lips as if they were still appetizing to me. I tucked my own lips in, and looked away feigning embarrassment for my thoughts. “Thank you.” I said clearing my throat and ducking into my seat.

  “You’re very welcome,” he said after I sat and looked back at him. Devin and him exchanged looks, sizing each other up. Neither seemed to like what they saw, but when no immediate risk was detected. Devin sat and Adrian walked away.

  Even with the silent communication between August and Devin behind my back, I managed to ignore them and pretend to enjoy myself.

  -And the winner is…-

  The competition for second place in the final round was tough. Haden had already earned first place since there was no chance of beating her. Garrett was among the second place competitors, and despite what I told him, I did cheer for him. I was secretly hoping that he would look over and smile at me, but that wasn’t so much a fantasy as a delusion.

  Devin and August seemed a little baffled that I would cheer for him after what happened, but they didn’t understand. Been there done that. If I had forgiven him for the first fifty punches, there was no point in holding a grudge against one more. It was the mantra of the battered wife, but it applied here as well. If they were surprised by my cheers, they would have had heart attacks if they knew I had sex with him on a toilet a few hours ago.

  However, in hind sight, that does sound a little shameful.

  The three competitors tied for second place were blindfolded and spun as if they were starting a round of “pin the tail on the donkey.” They were then released one by one in the center of the arena where four grim were fast approaching. They were to use their remaining ammo to shoot the grim—easier said than done in light of the dizzy spell.

  The first man didn’t have enough bullets, and he had to use the butt of his gun to kill his forth grim. It wasn’t worth as many points since he should have conserved his ammunition, but the crowd loved it.

  The second man was so dizzy he shot one of the handlers. Without question, he was immediately disqualified. Shooting innocent people was apparently frowned upon. Given the efforts the mayor had taken to ensure safety that was no surprise.

  Garrett was the last up, and he had plenty of bullets. Assuming he didn’t miss, he would win second place. I wasn’t on the edge of my seat, but I did find myself wiggling my foot a little too enthusiastically. August looked at me trying to discern my thoughts. I leaned over to her keeping my eyes on the arena. “Is it wrong to kind of hope he misses?”

  “I don’t imagine that it is from your perspective.”

  I offered her a chuckle and sat back in my seat to procure a yawn. When all four of Garrett’s bullets hit dead on in the heads of the grim I cheered and clapped. I shrugged at August pretending I was a little disappointed that he hadn’t lost.

  Haden and Garrett took their places alongside the third place winner—the guy who didn’t shoot a civilian. The master of ceremonies, AKA Jimmy the Card himself—who was apparently broadcasting live from the event, announced them as champions. I couldn’t help but laugh at the radio personality. He was a scrawny freckled red head with no business operating the voice box he had.

  Garrett seemed a little perturbed at taking second place, but he could hardly argue with how cool Haden’s shot was. Either way, he would be in the finale in ten months, so there was no reason to be pouty, except for his wounded pride. That was one area I had very little sympathy for.

  -Failure to Meet Potential-

  After the announcements, Haden was held back for photos and political mumbo jumbo—the type of stuff I had hoped would disappear after the reckoning. Apparently, there were too many politicians left behind for it to disappear for good.

  By the time we got out of the event center, the parking lots were nearly empty. No one liked hanging around this close to the northern camp after dark. I couldn’t say I blamed them. Even with the military on high alert and the tall electrified fences, the grim still looked ominous.

  As we reached the parking lot, I heard the sound of a familiar motorcycle. Garrett pulled out ahead of us with a wave of acknowledgement to our existence. I knew there was no chance of him sticking around. He had said as much, but once again how did screwing someone not entitle you to a verbal goodbye.

  “What was all that about?” August asked.

  My mind frantically tried to figure out what I had revealed. “Your brother is an ass.”

  She looked after the motorcycle confused about what I was talking about. “Don’t change the subject, why did you not follow my lead with that guy?”

  “Who, Adrian?” I grimaced. I couldn’t believe she was still on about that. “Dude was hot!”

  “Lenore,” —oh how I love being scolded by my own name— “you need to stop playing the fool to all this. I didn’t ask Garrett to train you so you could just be emboldened by your bitter
ness.”

  I scoffed. “I’m emboldened by my new skills. The bitterness is from the scars up and down my body.”

  “Stop it!” August didn’t yell the words so much as enunciate them in my face. I did indeed stop and looked at her. Devin and Haden divided and walked around us. They had no interest in being part of my admonishment. That was new.

  “I know you are mad at me. That has been abundantly clear since I came back. I thought it was just because I left you behind. I get it now. I know he put you through hell. He went too far, but…” She let the word hang while she focused her thoughts without eye contact. “I know my brother.” She looked at me squarely. “And I know you. If he had to go to that extreme to get what I needed from you, then I am on his side.”

  “What exactly do you need from me? I kind of lost that somewhere in all of this.”

  “For one thing, I need you to grow up.” I rolled my jaw trying to formulate a response that didn’t sound childish. The resulting conclusions left me silent. “I need you to start taking all of this seriously. I need you to take yourself seriously. You are important. Why do you think I keep pushing you?”

  “Because you want me to be able to defend myself, so you don’t always have to do it for me.” I offered blandly, since I had this lecture memorized.

  August shook her head. “Lenore, do you trust me with your life?”

  “Of course,” I stated firmly so she knew that there was never any doubt of that, no matter how mad I was.

  “Did it ever occur to you, I might want to trust you with mine?”

  My jaw went slack and I felt the blood in my face drop to my toes. I had never once considered having to save my heroine. The thought made me as sick as giving an extemporaneous speech in my underwear. “I don’t want that responsibility, August.” I shook my head vigorously. “I don’t even want to be responsible for the horses.” She frowned at the disjointed reference.

  “Lenore, you have to stop dragging your feet. You are better than this.”