by Lisa Sanchez
Damn frigging idiot.
One minute Xan was standing in the center of my room, the next he was on my bed. Literally on top of me, his body pressed against mine, while his hands braced against the wall on either side of me. He lowered his head, gently grazing his lips along the column of my neck as he inhaled my scent.
My head swam, and my breath caught. The feel of his mouth on my skin was almost too much. When his tongue grazed the bite marks he left the night before, it felt like a bomb went off. Fireworks exploded outward from my center, sending hot, pulsing streams of electricity throughout my body. I was completely lost to him, and a low moan escaped my lips.
His mouth, oh, God, his mouth. It traveled nice and slow up the length of my neck to my ear, and his warm breath tickled my skin as he whispered. “I’m here, Ainsley, because I was asked to watch over you.”
I gasped. The sensual high he had me on came to a screeching halt, as my brain processed what he told me. “Someone asked you to watch me? Who?”
He traced a finger across my collarbone sending goose bumps popping out all over my skin. The corner of his mouth turned up. “Your great-grandmother, of course.”
“My great-grandmother!” I shouted, while simultaneously pushing him away. “What?” It was like trying to shove a twenty-ton boulder, and it wasn’t until he saw I needed some space that he took pity on me and moved back, granting me some breathing room. He knew my great-grandmother? I couldn’t have been more surprised if someone had told me the world was being taken over by little blue aliens.
Seeing that I was still in need of space, Xan moved off the bed with a sensual ease that had my knees wobbling and my heart pounding.
How was it possible for any one person to be that sexy?
He grabbed hold of my desk chair, pulling it alongside the edge of the bed. After whipping it around, he straddled the thing, crossing his muscular arms over the back. “Are you ready for some answers, carino?”
Stunned, I was barely able to nod my head.
With a sigh, he ran his hand through his unruly hair. I could tell he was determined to answer my questions, but he looked visibly torn, pain twisting his beautiful features, and darkening his eyes. He opened his mouth several times to speak, only to snap it closed. Finally, with a shake of his head he began.
“You can’t imagine how long I’ve wanted to make my presence in your life known.” He shook his head and grimaced. “Waiting in the wings. Watching you from afar…it…it killed me.” He stared at me, his warm brown eyes piercing through me, penetrating the wall I’d built, breaking down my defenses. The depth of feeling he gave off with just his stare was staggering, and entirely captivating. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say he was looking at me like he was in love, but that would be impossible. And as ridiculous as the thought was, deep down, I wished it were true. Pathetic.
My incredulous stare must have clued him in to the fact I had no idea what he was talking about. I felt like an idiot, sitting open-mouthed, waiting for him to go on, but I didn’t know what to say.
He inclined his head toward me. “Shortly after you were born, your great-grandmother, Aileana, sought me out. Well aware of the extent of Lucian’s powers and knowing he would never cease his relentless vendetta against her and her offspring, she came to me in search of protection…for you.”
“Protection,” I said, repeating his words quietly. Wait…“Oh, God.” My hands shot up to my mouth as I stared at the beautiful vampire in front of me. “It was you. You’re the man from my dream. The man from the strange room my great-grandmother sent me to the night Lucian murdered my mother.”
Pieces of the puzzle began to fall in place. The familiarity and comfort I felt around him, the sensation of being watched for the past several weeks. Xan had watching over me for half my life — and I’d never had a clue. My great-grandmother and I were going to have a serious talk…and soon.
I heaved a sigh and shook my head. “Why would she seek you out specifically?” It was the million-dollar question. Who the hell was he, and where did he come from? My words seemed to hang in the air for an eternity before he finally answered.
He clasped his hands together, his forearms resting on the back of the chair. “My mother,” he said, pausing briefly, “was a very powerful witch.” His voice took on a harsh tone, and his jaw became rigid as he spoke. I knew instinctively that whatever he was about to share with me had been monumentally devastating for him.
“Much like her, the rest of her coven was a force to be reckoned with. Tales of their magical prowess and abilities spread far and wide throughout Europe. That was how he found her. Attracted like a moth to a flame, Lucian” — he spat his name through gritted teeth — “Lucian traveled to Spain intent upon draining the coven of their power, and in turn feeding his own.”
I waved my hand through the air in front of me. “Okay…I get it. Your mother was a witch. That’s why you can wield magic.” I nodded, urging him with my eyes to go on. I hung on his every word as though it were my lifeline.
He closed his eyes for a moment, doing his best to control his temper as it flared. His hands moved from where they’d been crossed easily over the back of the chair and were now gripping it so hard the flimsy metal buckled under his grip, the back of the chair completely mangled.
“Um…I use that chair,” I said, pointing to his hands. “If you don’t mind?” The idea of braving the Christmas rush at the local Target to purchase a new chair sent my intestines churning. I’d take on vampires and zombies over crazed Christmas shoppers any day of the week, and twice on Sunday.
He looked down for a moment at his hands and then back at me with apologetic eyes. He stood and shoved the chair aside. “Sorry,” he said gruffly and began pacing as he spoke.
The muscles in his face tensed and he ran a hand through his hair. “The coven scattered, taking refuge where they could, but not before Lucian took out a handful of its members, and not before he became obsessed with my mother.”
“Obsessed?” I said in shock. I knew Lucian was consumed with desire for power, and the idea that he might have carried a torch for my grandmother had crossed my mind more than once. Could that have been what drove him to destroy the women in my family? Was he obsessed with my great-grandmother like he’d been obsessed with Xan’s mother? He was a deranged lunatic. It made sense that he’d be some sort of freakish stalker as well.
Xan met my gaze with a set of stormy eyes, and it was then that I knew his mother’s fate, even before he spoke the words.
“He was so taken with her beauty, that he convinced himself she was his match in every way. He pursued her with a zeal that was nothing short of insanity. Of course, she wanted nothing to do with him, which eventually led to her death. His sick obsession was her end. My mother went into hiding, giving her enough time to alert her sister coven — your great-grandmother’s coven — to Lucian’s threat.”
I interrupted him then. “And where were you during all of this?”
His brows furrowed momentarily, a fleeting look of despair crossing his face. It was gone as quickly as it came, replaced once again with a harsh, clenched jaw and haunted eyes. “I was hidden away, kept secret so that he wouldn’t know of my existence.”
“I see,” I said, lowering my eyebrows and frowning. “And just how old are you?”
He stared at the wall behind me with tired, hollow eyes, refusing to look at me. “I was born in sixteen seventy-two.”
The loud thud that came from my jaw hitting the floor was the only sound in the room. Three hundred thirty-seven! He’s three hundred thirty-seven!
“You’re…but…” I stammered like a jackass. Pretty Boy was old. Damn old. “I’m confused. You said your mother’s coven contacted my great-grandmother.”
He shook his head. “No, carino. I said my mother’s coven contacted your great-grandmother’s coven. I did not, however, say when. Thi
s all happened centuries before your family came into the picture.”
I continued staring at him like a mute idiot. What the hell do you say to someone who has just told you they’re so old they could be classified as a fossil? You don’t say anything — which is why I kept my trap shut.
Frowning, Xan picked up where he’d left off. “It was shortly after my mother went into hiding that Lucian found her, and dispensed a deadly ultimatum. She could stand beside him as his queen for eternity, or suffer untold cruelties and die.” He paused for a moment, his jaw rigid and the muscles in his neck straining from the anger coursing through him. The temperature in the room had taken a serious nose dive, and my teeth chattered as I continued listening.
“My mother, of course, chose death.” Xan’s voice was low and full of a hatred the likes of which I’d never seen. “Lucian tortured her for days…breaking every bone in her body before…cutting her to pieces.”
The temperature in the room dropped further still, my warm breath visible in the icy air as he paced back and forth with clenched fists. He stopped and looked at me head on. “When he was finally done with her, he cut out her eyes, her tongue, and lastly her heart, which I’ve heard rumored he still keeps, locked away in a special box.”
Tears streamed down my face as I listened to the horrific tale of his mother’s death. If there was anyone on this god-forsaken planet who knew what I was going through, it was Xan. He, too, knew the horrific pain that came with the loss of a loved one by a murderer’s hand. Despite my anger and frustration with him, and with my great-grandmother for keeping me in the dark all these years, my heart went out to him after hearing his gut-wrenching story. I wanted to comfort him, hold him, tell him I understood.
Unable to sit still for another moment, I crawled off my bed, crossed the small gap between us, and wrapped my arms around him, burying my face in the wide expanse of his chest. “I’m so sorry, Xan.” I ran one hand up and down his back in long, soothing strokes, just breathing him in. I held on tight with my other arm, waiting for him to respond, to hold me back, or at least say something. It wasn’t until I was about to pull away that his powerful arms snaked around me, pulling me closer.
He rested his cheek against the top of my head. A large, warm hand trailed up my back, coming to rest at the base of my neck. He buried his fingers beneath the longer layers of my hair. “Ainsley,” he whispered.
I pulled back ever so slightly, taking in the magnificence of his caramel and gold eyes. We stood in silence, lost in each other’s gaze for an immeasurable amount of time. The whirling sensation in my gut swirled out of control and my breath caught as he leaned forward. Oh, God. Is he going to —
The door to my room burst open, Taylor and Jessica barreling in, giggling away until they saw Xan and me in each other’s arms.
Startled, I shot out of Xan’s arms as if I’d been caught doing something I shouldn’t have. I cast him a quick glance, my lips trembling and my heart aching in disappointment before turning to face my roommates. Would he have kissed me had we not been interrupted?
“Holey Dooley!” Taylor mumbled and covered her eyes as she inch-wormed her way out the door. “Sorry, you two. We’ll, uh, just be on our way then.”
“Uh…yeah,” Jessica said, eyeballing us speculatively as she too backed out of the room. She shot me a worried look from inside the doorframe. “You okay?” she mouthed.
I nodded my head, giving her a reassuring smile. I still had a ton of unanswered questions, but I knew I was safe with Xan. Especially now that I knew my great-grandmother had sought his help. Keeping me safe was her main priority, and if she trusted Xan, then I knew I could too.
She cast me a half-hearted smile, her brows knit together in concern as she stepped out into the hallway, closing the door behind her.
“Sorry about that,” I said, turning to face Xan who stood with his back against the nearby wall. He looked different somehow, like he was tired or drained, and I wondered if he was missing out on the vampire equivalent of sleep as it was daytime. Did he have a coffin tucked away somewhere in his apartment? Or did he sleep in a refrigerator like the vamp from that blasted television show?
He dismissed the interruption with a slight wave of his hand, which I noticed was trembling, along with the rest of him. “This probably isn’t the best place for us to be having this conversation. Would you feel comfortable picking up where we left off at my place?”
My heart jumped at the thought of being alone with Xan in his apartment, and I almost shouted my answer. “Yes!” This was what we needed. Time alone together to talk and get to know each other without being interrupted by zombies or well-meaning roommates.
He gave a weak chuckle at my enthusiasm and held out a shaky hand, motioning for me to come to him. Something was wrong. He looked off.
I closed the gap between us. “What’s the matter with you? You look…well, you look kinda bad.” His beautiful brown eyes had turned a pale yellow, and a thin sheen of sweat covered his skin. He leaned heavily against the wall with his jaw clenched.
“It’s the sun,” he said, grimacing. He squinted his eyes and glanced at the window before focusing on me. “Take my hand, carino. There’s little time left. Hurry. I’ll explain when we get to my place.”
Scared by his rapid decline, I hurriedly placed my hand in his, not wanting him to suffer a second more than he had to. The moment our hands met, Xan teleported us to his apartment, placing us in the center of his…bedroom?
I whirled around. “Um…Xan?” I felt more than a little awkward standing in the center of what was obviously his bedroom. There were no windows in the dark space, the only light coming from a few candles that spontaneously illuminated upon our entry. The room was also coffin free. Thank you, God!
Xan stumbled across the room, collapsing onto his bed with a groan. His body seized up, stiffened and his back arched off the mattress.
Panic took over. I didn’t think, I just reacted and raced to his side, kneeling alongside the bed. “Xan! What’s wrong?”
All it took was a split second. Xan grasped hold of my arms, rolling me onto the bed, positioning himself so that he hovered over me like a hungry predator ready to kill. His hands pinned my arms above my head, while his powerful legs straddled either side of me, making it impossible to escape.
Xan’s head reared back with a loud hiss, his razor sharp fangs elongating before my eyes. A wave of terror washed over me. I fought in vain against his iron grip, my legs thrashing, doing all I could to get away. It was no use. Bloodlust had taken over. A wild pair of eyes bore into my own, hungry and desperate for the one thing that would ease its craving. My blood.
The next thing I knew, I was thrown from the bed, landing far across the room with a heavy thud. I groaned. I was so going to feel that one in the morning. Wasting no time, I scrambled to my feet, but stood frozen in place, unable and unwilling to move. As afraid as I was for my life, I was also afraid for his. Xan had every opportunity to tear me apart — but he didn’t. He was still in control, though for how long was another question.
He pegged me with a savage glare as he crouched on top of his bed like a half-starved lion ready to attack. Every inch of his hard body flexed. His thick muscles pulsated and twitched as he clung to his last vestige of control. “Cristo!” His normally smooth voice sounded raw and gritty. “Get back! Now!”
The rational part of me wanted to listen to him and bolt — get the hell out of the room and stay safe. Having never been one to listen to reason, I stubbornly ignored his warnings, as well as my own. I stepped forward, arm outstretched. “Xan? What can I do?”
A loud, feral snarl filled the air and he shot off the opposite side of the bed, cramming himself up against the wall in a crouch with his knees to his chest. “Stay back, carino. It’s not safe. I — I need — to feed.”
His chest rumbled. A low, frightening sound emanated while he fought
against his body’s primal need, and hung on by a very thin thread. His normally warm, brown eyes had not returned, but remained a pale yellow that made my blood run cold. Razor sharp fangs glistened in the candlelight as he panted like a wild animal, glaring at me from across the room as if he were ready to pounce at any moment. It would only take a second. In the blink of an eye, my life could be over. Terror rushed through me.
“Quickly,” he panted. “The kitchen…in the refrigerator…the bags…please.” Ancient, feral eyes stared at me, and I knew I didn’t have much time before he lost control.
I didn’t hesitate. I rushed for the bedroom door, throwing it open as I raced into the small kitchen area of his apartment. As I opened the refrigerator door, my eyes immediately found what I was looking for, along with a quite a bit of stuff I wasn’t. Stacks of blood-filled bags riddled the top shelf and inside door of his fridge. The second shelf was loaded with food. Regular food. Lunchmeat, soda, fruit, and eggs — you name it, it was in there.
I snatched a couple of bags of A-positive and high-tailed it back to his bedroom, filing thoughts about the contents of his fridge away for a time when I wasn’t worried about whether or not he was going to eat me.
“Here,” I hollered as I stood just inside the door, and chucked one of the blood-filled plastic bags at him as hard as I could.
He caught the bag one handed and immediately sank his fangs through the plastic. An animal-like snarling came from him as he drained the thing in several long, hard pulls. Blood streamed down his chin onto his shirt. My stomach turned as I stood in horror, watching him. I could barely make it through an hour of Grey’s Anatomy without turning my head from the blood and guts, and here sat the object of my desire, sucking it down like it was nectar from the gods.