Falling In Between

by Devon Ashley

  “In all fairness, I wasn’t even alive when those came out.”

  “Yeah, but you’ve seen Gone with the Wind, haven’t you?”

  “Oh, come on! That was a literary classic!”

  “It barely made color it’s so old!”

  I pushed him and he rolled sideways onto the ground. “I’m not even gonna defend that one.”

  He laughed as he rolled back up. “Glad you didn’t do that in the paddleboat. So which one do you want to see? One’s about a kid skipping class and living it up on the town, the other is about a couple of cops. They’re both comedic.”

  “Kid skipping class. And I should warn you now, just to keep you from having any crazy outbursts in the future, that I have zero movies in my repertoire. And by zero, I literally mean I’ve barely seen any movies in my life.” I finished my treat and crumpled up the paper cone. When I looked over at him, he was looking at me kinda funny. “What? You’re not gonna smack me with a soccer ball again, are you?”

  He smiled and tilted his cap farther down. “Nah. Then you may really forget about me. So why are you so uneducated in the ways of cinematography?”

  Ugh…even in my dreams I’m forced to say this crap. Not cool.

  “I’m a ward of state, so I’ve never had anyone to give me money for a movie. And the group homes usually only had one TV and I really wasn’t one to fight for control over it.”

  He fidgeted with his cap again. Treading carefully, he asked, “You’re in the system?” When I nodded he continued with, “You know, if you grew up like that, we don’t need to create a juvie record to bring you back down to earth.” He stood up and offered me his hand. “Come on.”

  He pulled me to my feet and kept a tight hold on my hand all the way back to the truck. Three hours later we emerged from the theater and he snagged my hand again.

  “So what did you think?”

  I gently bumped him as we walked. “I think you’ve earned the right to keep choosing the movies.” And that was a rarity with me. Chance was the first guy that didn’t take me to some creepy monster movie that made me sick to my stomach.

  “Well, that would mean we’re going on more dates. Are you even going to remember we have a date the next time I come to find you?”

  “Maybe…if you did something so memorable I couldn’t possibly forget about you.”

  He reached out to open the passenger door, but his hand paused on the handle. His other hand dropped mine and slowly trailed upwards to the side of my face. My heart pumped faster and faster as his mouth neared, his eyes set softly on mine. Our lips had barely touched before he suddenly hovered. Several seconds passed, then motion kicked back in and our lips locked for good. My insides felt all nervous and I’m sure he felt me tremble when his other hand pressed against my back. My body flinched a little when he did that, but zero pain followed his touch – guess my back wasn’t hurt in dreamland. My body relaxed as he deepened the kiss and my hands came to life and slid their way around his neck.

  When I awoke the next morning, I still had a smile on my face. Weird thing was, I could totally remember every little detail of that dream. Usually when I dreamed, the images I saw during the night would fade fast, and maybe only the slightest of details would linger for me to analyze. But for some reason, I could recall everything Chance and I did on both dates.

  Except the movie. Maybe the time at the theatre was just an illusion cause I still felt like I hadn’t seen it. There were a few moments here and there, like scenes you’d see from the advertisement promos run on TV. I didn’t really pay much attention to the TV in our dorm room, but Sophie always had it going on in the background. I probably just caught a promo at one time and never even realized it.

  What I didn’t quite get was why I dreamt of some random guy twice in a row. Okay, I’ve had random guys inserted into my dreams before, but never the same creation twice in a row. Don’t get me wrong; I loved that this particular hotty had shown up twice now, cause he’s actually really sweet and funny. I’m just saying…weird.

  But yay! Totally got the kisses this time! And for some reason, my mouth felt all stretched out and sore, like all those heavy duty lip locks really happened. But score one for the imagination, cause Chance definitely knew how to get my heart skippin’!

  Sophie and I met after sixth period and slowly made our way through the main courtyard. It was clear and mild out, and the sun kissed our skin with the perfect amount of warmth. So we couldn’t help but stop at one of the running fountains to dip our feet in.

  The sculpture had a skinny base that fanned out as it became a large bird’s nest with several baby birds facing out in different directions. They looked to the sky for their mother, mouths open and awaiting food. Water shot from their mouths and fell into the pool, but the base was so large that we only got hit with the faintest of droplets.

  I knew the glistening swirls of water before me were harmless, but my heart still sped up a wee bit faster when the cool liquid made contact with my skin.

  “So you wanna hear some gossip?”

  “Always.” Unless it was about me and my stupid jump, of course.

  “I heard that Lena chick from our history class last year didn’t come back cause she got knocked up by that Jeremy kid.”

  Alright, I’m not really one for gossip, but pregnancy scandals always rocked the house.

  Gasping, I cried, “Seriously?”

  “Yep, and in every athletic class today, every guy in this school got handed a box of condoms.”

  “What?!”

  “That’s what Jhett said in his text to me earlier. So I’m thinking it’s gonna be a little hard sneaking into opposite dorms for awhile. At least until this blows over.”

  Not so much a problem for me since Robert and I hadn’t advanced beyond simple kisses, but Jhett and Sophie were a little more hands-on than we were. Robert had already been given the boot once this week cause their heavier make-out session required a little privacy.

  “Wouldn’t giving them condoms just encourage them to have more sex?”

  “Probably not. Either they’ve got a girl willing to ride ‘em or they don’t.”

  Sophie abruptly screamed and her body jerked forward, but I swear I jumped a hell of a lot higher than she did. Luckily, I immediately felt the familiar comfort of Robert’s hands on my shaky shoulders, and he pressed down to ground me to the fountain’s concrete base. That’s when I realized Jhett was flat against Sophie’s back and had thrust her forward, but not really far enough to push her into the water.

  She playfully shot up and chased after him through the sea of people, trying constantly to swat after him. My heart found its way back to my chest and I tilted my head back to see Robert smiling down at me. He knew better than to do that to me, as I was still a little wary about pools of water.

  “Hi,” he said, leaning down to kiss my forehead.

  “Hi.”

  He grabbed my bag as I stepped out of the fountain and slipped my shoes back on.

  “So Jhett and I were thinking we could double date tonight.”

  I glanced as Jhett and Sophie rushed by us again, and I spat out a sarcastic, “Oh, goody.”

  He laughed at me and gave my back a little shove toward the dorms. “Come on. You know it’ll be fun.”

  At six, Sophie and I met them in the commons and headed outside. I can tell you three things about Robert’s car. It’s black, it has two doors and it says Infiniti on the back…but that’s all I’ve got. Sophie and I literally had to squeeze ourselves into the backseat and we quietly whispered all the way to the restaurant. It drove the guys nuts – and that’s totally why we did it.

  We ate at some remote steakhouse in the middle of nowhere, so it was nice and quiet inside and out. After dinner, we stuck around and went our separate ways on the property, which had outside eating areas, a flowing creek nearby and wooden ramp walkways that led to different hiking trails.

  Robert pulled me in the direction of the creek, and once we
were out of view of the restaurant, he brought us to a stop.

  Teasingly, I asked, “What is it with you and the water?”

  “Well, we could always go back to my car and hit the backseat.”

  I rolled my eyes, knowing he was just screwing with me. “Like we could both fit in the backseat of that car. No wonder your parents got you that one.”

  He chuckled and replied, “Yeah, but the seat reclines really far back.” With a wink, he added, “I can show you later if you’d like.”

  “Uh-huh.” I nudged a rock on top of the tip of my shoe and flicked it up into the air. A moment later a splash filled the air beside Robert and he was forced to jump sideways to stay dry. I swear I wasn’t really aiming for him. Hell, I couldn’t aim that well if my life depended on it.

  Eyeing me playfully, he tossed a rock back and forth between his hands. “Was that an accident, or do you have a wet t-shirt competition you need me to get you ready for?”

  I held my hands up in surrender, not fancying the visual of what a wet version of my beaded blue top would do to enhance the curves of my figure. I slowly edged towards him and slipped my hand into his to pull him back towards the trail again.

  “Come on. You can play with the water any time.”

  He tossed the rock to the ground and let me lead him back to the ramps around the restaurant.

  “So why haven’t you told me about your family yet?” Wow. Big sigh on his part. “You know, you don’t have to hide the fact that you have one. It’s not something I can hold against you or anything.”

  “It’s not that,” he said, pulling me to a stop. “It’s just…what happened to you disturbs me. I can’t even begin to understand how someone could abandon their child like that. What kind of person just leaves a newborn outside for someone to find?”

  My guess was a teenager that managed to keep the pregnancy and birth a secret. At least that’s the nicest version I’ve calculated over the years.

  I let go of his hand and stepped back to lean against the railing, and he did the same opposite of me.

  “I’m not gonna lie and say I haven’t been a little bitter at times. But it is what it is. Come June I’ll be eighteen and I won’t have to deal with most of this anymore.”

  “Jenna, you’re always going to have to deal with this.”

  “Yeah, well, maybe you can tell me something positive about family that’ll lead me to have some faith in the concept. I know they’re not all bad. Sophie’s parents are really great to her and I can see how much they love her. And they’re incredibly kind to share all their holidays with me so I don’t have to spend them in a cold, empty dorm building. But yeah, sometimes I wish I had my own family to have Christmas dinner with.”

  Half way through my eyes diverted to the wood panels beneath our feet. By the time I finished, a tear had managed to slip through and my voice choked a bit. I saw his feet step towards me and felt him pull my body against his. I leaned my head against his shoulder and buried my eyes into his neck. I breathed in the familiar scent of his cologne and it began to calm me from the inside out.

  After holding me quietly for a moment, he began with, “My parents are a little outside Hartford, Connecticut. My dad works as one of those high-priced attorneys with a never-ending work load, but he always manages to get home by a decent hour when he needs to. Surprisingly, he made it to most of my swim meets growing up, so at least he believes in family first. My mom stays at home and is definitely what you would call a socialite. And it bugs the crap out of her that I won’t involve myself in all the activities the kids of other socialites do. My brother Reynold graduated from Columbia last year and got married over the summer. And I actually like my new sister-in-law. She’s very down to earth, easy to please and has no problem putting my brother in his place when the situation calls for it.”

  I chortled softly. “I think I like her too.”

  “You and Julie would get along very well.”

  “They sound nice.”

  My body lifted a little when he tried to shrug. “We have our fair share of family drama, but yeah, for the most part, it’s pretty nice.” After a moment’s hesitation he asked, “So, are you going to tell me about your families?”

  I huffed automatically. Family. I don’t think I’d call anything I had family. “I’m not damaged or anything if that’s what you’re asking.”

  “No.”

  “I was adopted as a baby but they gave me up when I was three. I don’t know why. I was never told why. Not even when I was old enough to understand it. From there I had a few foster homes but people just weren’t interested in adopting anything but a baby. Guess they wanted to start their family from scratch. I kinda felt like a cat in a pound. Why adopt the older cat when you can have the cute kitten instead? When I got older I was sent to some group homes but I didn’t really like those. Some of those kids were seriously messed up. I guess their roads were a little more rocky than mine.

  “But no, my life hasn’t damaged me. No one ever screwed with me emotionally. I was never abused. None of the social workers ever tried to take advantage of me. I just never had a place to call home. Never had a real family.”

  When Robert realized I wasn’t gonna say anymore, his body returned to life. He started to rub my back but stopped the moment he started. It had been a week since the last time he really did that and I’m sure the memory of me groaning in pain just shot through his head.

  “How’s your back doing?”

  “Better. Most of the scabs are gone.” Cause after he snagged me that night, I had Sophie use a freakin’ loofah every night to help flake them off already.

  He carefully stroked my back, and when I didn’t wince or complain he became more relaxed with the motion.

  “How long do you think they’re gonna take?” I asked.

  “Depends on what they’re doing.”

  I lifted my head and caught the sinful grin on his face. “You’re not seriously implying they’re having sex already?”

  “After a week? Not really. But neither of them are virgins either, so…” He shrugged.

  “I’m thinking now would be a good time to mention that I am still a virgin, and I plan on staying that way for a little while.” I was so glad my head was buried in his neck cause I don’t think I would’ve found the courage to admit that otherwise.

  He gave me a gentle squeeze. “Me too.”

  I don’t know why those two little words surprised me. I guess I had envisioned Robert being more experienced than me. I had gone on a few dates over the years but was never serious with anyone. I wasn’t even sure if Robert ever dated anyone here. I certainly hadn’t ever noticed him carrying anyone’s book bag or hanging out in the commons the way he did with me. At least not for the past year, when I really began to pay attention to what he was doing. (No pun intended).

  “Just as well. Sophie thinks it’ll be harder to sneak into each other’s room now that a student has gotten pregnant and they’re passing out condoms.”

  “You know about the condoms?”

  “Everyone knows about the condoms. Seriously, what kind of school organization gives out condoms to students?”

  “The ones smart enough to accept that we’re going to have sex no matter what they say or do. They’re going to have to deal with the parents one way or the other, so they’d rather defend their action of supplying protection versus having any more students get pregnant under their watch. If you think about it, they’re not really saying go have sex, they’re just saying protect yourself if you do. But I think Sophie’s right. They’re going to pay a little more attention to where people are going for a while.”

  “So now everyone will just go off campus to be alone.”

  “That’s right.”

  I sighed, and followed it up by breathing in another soothing round of his cologne. “So what did you do with your box?”

  “Put it in my bedside table.”

  “Didn’t even crack the seal and put one in your wallet?
”

  “No.” There was something comforting about the way he didn’t hesitate to say that. He gave me another squeeze. “Ready to go back to the car?”

  “Please. I’m tired of standing.”

  When we got back to his little Infiniti, I slid into the passenger seat instead of the back just to keep my legs from going into shock. Once he found a decent song on the radio, he reached out and played with my hand. After about ten minutes, Sophie and Jhett came around the back corner of the restaurant.

  “Should I be offended that you didn’t even try to make out with me in here?”

  He licked his lips and pressed them tight, but he couldn’t stop them from curling into a delicious smile. “I lied. This is a horrible car to make out in. Your reason for my parents choosing this model may have been right on target.”

  I couldn’t help but laugh at him.

  “Now don’t be offended by this either, but I’m going to have to put you in the backseat again. If I thought it was at all possible for Jhett to get in and out of that backseat, I would absolutely shove him back there.”

  I swayed our hands in the air and narrowed my eyes. “Don’t worry. I’ll just start you a tab.”

  I stepped out of the car and squeezed myself into the back. And yes, I noticed Robert watch me crawl behind his seat from the rear view mirror, and the little wink he gave when I caught him.

  I think my heart just fluttered a bit. In fact, it fluttered a lot during the drive home due to the number of times I caught him gazing at me.

  When we got back to the academy, Sophie and Jhett took off the moment she squeezed out. Robert popped his seat forward so I wouldn’t have to crawl to the other side, and cause Sophie was quick to shut that door behind her.

  So much for ho’s over bro’s.

  I may have been small enough to maneuver my way in and out, but it was still awkward trying to wiggle through a twelve inch berth with a seatbelt strap to fight. I practically fell into his arms. (Alright, I may have purposely lost my balance. Sue me).