You Can Always Go Home

by Rogers, Desiree

  The day she’d buried Donald, she’d hidden all her dreams and hopes of having a family, of being a mother. If she were being honest, that dream had burned away the day her father had pulled her out of school and dragged her half way across the country. The day she’d left Luciano behind. She shifted, uneasy with where that thought was taking her, the feelings it stirred up.

  A wistful smile bloomed at the squeal of delight Bianca gave when her uncle picked her up and threw her over his shoulder, laughing at her futile kicks. Would he have been as good with their children? That stray thought had the ice clinking against the sides of her glass, drops spilling onto her hand and legs.

  Sofia, Luc’s mother, sat down in the empty chaise next to her, a napkin at the ready.

  “You okay?” her voice soft with concern.

  A self conscious laugh, she took the offered napkin, wiping at the spilled liquid. “I’m fine. Just a little clumsy.”

  Sofia nodded sagely, her eyes moving from Alexina to where her son was, his eyes on Alexina while the children climbed all over him.

  “Are you having a good time dear?” her eyes moving back to Alexina.

  She flushed, nodding eagerly. “This is great. I’m glad Luciano invited me.”

  Sofia shook her head, a wry grin on her lips. “I told him it would be okay. He wanted to bring you, but was unsure of how it would seem. When I heard you were in town, I wanted to make sure you were okay. Especially since you are here, alone.” Her soft Spanish accent, barely noticeable after so many years in Texas, put Alexina’s fears of intruding at ease.

  “Well, I’m thankful either way. I was starting to drown in paperwork.”

  Sofia’s eyes lit up, but Alexina didn’t think it had to do with the mention of paperwork. Her next question confirmed her suspicions.

  “You are staying, then? Here in Killeen?” The earnest, happy sparkle in her eyes had Alexina flushing, feeling oddly shy.

  “Yes. I plan to open a clothing store. Something I dreamed of for a while, but I put it on hold when I got married and then...” she stopped, aware that she was babbling, telling more than she planned.

  The older woman nodded, understanding clear in her warm, pecan brown eyes. “Being a widow is much like being in limbo. Unsure of where your place is.” Alexina shifted, unnerved with the probing gaze shot her way.

  “It was the same for me when Luciano’s father died.”

  Having never heard a word about Luciano’s father or his death, her ears perked up. She wondered how to get the other woman to continue after she lapsed into silence, her eyes on her children and grandchildren playing. She sat forward, intent on questioning the subject further, before a thought struck her, or rather froze her in place. Why was she so concerned? She had no plans for Luciano, no desire to take things further. As long as she kept telling herself that, she would be fine. She sank back into the chaise, pushing Luciano to the furthest part of her brain.

  ~***~

  Luciano gave a soft grunt as his niece kicked him in his stomach, giggling as she scampered over him. With a grimace he stood, moving away from the jumble of legs and arms as the kids wrestled on the ground. His attention was on Alexina relaxing next to his mother. His gut was in knots, watching her, surrounded by his family, getting along with them and interacting with them.

  It was just like when they were in high school, and just the sight of her was enough to send him into overdrive. Having her here now, after all this time, had his chest tight with indefinable emotions. What he wanted to do was walk over to her, pull her into his arms and kiss her senseless, let her know that his feelings for her hadn’t changed, seemed to have only gotten stronger with the years. It was obvious from her previous reactions though, that she would only pull away from him, give him that damn smile of hers and flit away.

  He had the sudden urge to just shake her until that distant look went away, and the fire that he remembered to came back. What had happened to her since high school? What had caused her to be so wary, so distant? Sure, she smiled readily enough, and flirted like mad, but it never quite reached her eyes. He’d only seen that happen a time or two and never directed at him.

  Out the corner of his eye, he saw his sister watching him watch Alexina and he grimaced as she moved towards him. Not that he didn’t love his little sister, but sometimes, she was a pain. Sure, she was diminutive in size, but she had a mean left hook when she didn’t get her way.

  “So, that’s Alexina?” His sister smirked, sticking out her tongue at the scowl on his face. “She is striking.”

  “Yeah, I know.” He turned to face his sister fully, hands shoved deep in his pants. “What do you want?”

  “So, what’s going on between you two?” she batted her eyelashes, making him snort in response.

  “None of your business.” The bland look on his face had her scrunching her nose up in irritation.

  “So, that means nothing.” Her hands on her hip, she rolled her eyes at him in exasperation. “Are you still pining for Kelsie and all that nonsense?”

  The look he shot her had her stepping back, her mouth slack in shock. “Okay, calm down. I was just asking. SO, what do you plan on doing with Alexina?”

  Luciano shook his head, rubbing a hand over his face. What the hell was he going to do? The raging desire he held for her was making his temper short and his nights long. Since she’d been back in his life, there’d been dreams about her every night, the same intense dreams from high school that had him reaching out in the night only to find emptiness.

  “Just be careful ok.”

  Startled by the worry in her voice, he looked over at her. “Why do you say that?”

  She shrugged, her shoulders moving elegantly beneath the sheer tunic she was wearing. “She seems to have a lot to deal with and you might get hurt in the process.”

  Luciano chuckled, bemused at his sister’s worry. “Ah, are you worried about me?”

  “Fine, don’t listen to me. Just don’t come whining when things don’t work out the way you are so obviously dreaming of them happening.” She glared his way, hair swinging across her back as she strode away.

  Chapter Nine

  Jake watched Morgan stroll into his office, a grim smile on the older gentleman’s face. Jake leaned back in his leather chair, legs crossed. “Is there any sign of it?”

  Morgan sat down in the stiff back chair situated in front of Jake’s desk, a dour look etched on his young face. “I can’t find it anywhere. Maybe he didn’t have any info.” He shrugged his shoulders; a frustrated hand ran through his hair.

  Jake stood and walked to the window behind his desk, to stare out over the busy traffic of Massachusetts Avenue. “Trust me, he was the kind of person to make back-ups of back-ups. He had to put it somewhere.” He whirled around to face Morgan, an idea popping into his head, “What about Alexina? Does she have it?”

  The younger man shrugged, “I don’t think so. When I saw her at the reunion, she didn’t act all that different.”

  At the mention of the reunion, Jake’s face creased with anger and annoyance, “I still think it was a stupid move for you to go to her reunion. She had to have known that you were not from the area.” He sat back down, staring at the younger as he fidgeted in his chair under the scrutiny.

  “I don’t think she even noticed. She and that guy she was with were pretty heavy into each other.” He’d thought he was doing something smart, but the moment he’d mentioned his move to Jake a few days ago, the older man had gone into a rage, throwing things and cursing. Just thinking about it was enough to send chills down Morgan’s spine.

  Jake shook his head at the young man’s statement, irritation clearly etched on his face. “Still, that could come back to bite us. Sometimes, I wonder what is going through your head.”

  “You said you wanted the information. I did what was necessary.” He replied defensively. Damn if he was going to let any person call him stupid.

  Jake waved away the other man’s statement, clearly
unthreatened by the brief show of bravado. “We have to find it. If Mr. C finds out that we don’t have a handle on this, we’re going to be in serious trouble.”

  “Don’t worry. We’ll find it one way or another.”

  ~***~

  The stately houses slid by as Luciano drove up Nola Ruth Boulevard in Harker Heights towards his home. When he’d suggested she come see his house after the bar-be-que, Alexina had accepted readily enough. Now that they were in his truck, alone, with soft jazz playing in the background, she was beginning to regret her haste. He hadn’t spoken a word since they’d started; only looked at her occasionally with an odd gleam in his eye. It was enough to send her body into overdrive, heat racing through her system, fingertips hot with the flow of blood.

  They pulled up to a large, gray brick house and stopped. Sitting forward, she peered out the windshield to take in the black shutters and elegant landscaping. Beautiful ivy grew up the wall of the garage, with white flowers that gleamed in the darkness. They caught her eye and delighted by it all, she sighed, fingertips touching the glass. The urge to press her forehead to the window was overwhelming and she went with it, letting her eyes wander the grounds; beautiful reds and whites came through the darkness to brighten the otherwise dark façade. Heart beating fast in her ribs, it wasn’t too hard to imagine kids playing in the yard, kicking a ball between them and because it was so much what she wanted, she turned away to focus on the superficial.

  “It’s huge!” She stared to look at Luciano, eyes wide. “You live here, by yourself?”

  “Yup.” He unfolded his large frame from the driver’s seat and got out, coming around to her side.

  She let him take her hand as they strolled up the walkway and shivered at the sense of pleasure that swept over her as his thumb caressed the back of her knuckles. The weight of his stare made her self-conscious, and she kept her gaze deliberately ahead as they neared his front door.

  Alexina stepped past the Spanish styled mahogany door that he held open for her, her eyes adjusting to the dark. Luciano led her into the living room, turning on a few lamps, a warm glow cast through the large room. As he walked around the generous sized room, she took in her surroundings. The walls were a deep rust color, set off by stark black and white photographs of the Texas landscape. With its chrome lamps and blossoming potted plants, it was nothing like the bachelor pad she had imagined.

  He came back to her, the skin on her back warmed by his powerful hand through the thin t-shirt she was wearing. He urged her smoothly into the cozy looking room and her skin tingled in response to the heat radiating from his body.

  “Did you want something to drink?” the smoldering look in his eyes belied the innocent smile on his face.

  She stepped away from his touch and struggled to ignore the intense throb in her loins. “No, I’m fine.”

  Undaunted by her hesitancy, he stepped closer to her, a hand on her elbow, “So, you want to see the rest?” he tilted his head to the side, a dare on his lips.

  “Of course I do.” Alexina stepped back to let him lead her through the rest house.

  Luciano took her into the kitchen, painted a deep sunset yellow color, with its white appliances and bight breakfast nook. After a quick stop to view his yard, he led her down a long hall the color of sunset in summer on the other side of the house, showing her his office. A massive drawing table stood in the middle, the room a subdued beige color. She had to bite back a smile at the exuberance he exhibited when she asked to see drawings of some of the cars he was working on. When he started to lead her towards what was obviously the master bedroom, she dug her heels in, suddenly scared of what lay beyond the door.

  “How about we head back to the living room?” she questioned, a tremble in her fingers. She clasped her sweaty palms together, a bright smile in place.

  Luciano stared at her quizzically a moment, before her took her clammy hand in his and headed back the way they came.

  A sigh of relief slipped out when they were back in the well-lit living room. “You have a very impressive home Luciano. I’m in awe.”

  He grimaced at the use of his full name, voice gruff when he spoke. “Have a seat.” With a vague gesture towards the overstuffed black couch centered on the fireplace, he turned and walked away. “I’ll get us something to drink.”

  The desire to say no was on the tip of her tongue, but Luciano was already gone, disappearing into the kitchen. Alexina sat down on the couch, her eyes drawn to the expansive, lush green backyard outside the living room.

  “So, how’s the business plan going?” he sat down beside her, a glass of white wine in either hand. Luciano handed her one, then leaned back against the couch, his ankle propped up on his knee. He took a sip, gray eyes trained on her.

  A self-decrepitating laugh escaped and she had to fight to stop from choking on her wine. “Well, I haven’t started to drink yet, so I guess I’m doing great.”

  The wistful smile on his face at the joke had Alexina taking a healthy swallow of wine, her attention darting from the smoky gray of his eyes to the sexy outline of the smile on his lips.

  “You know, if you need any help, I’m willing.” He offered as one of his fingers trailed up her arm, teasing her earlobe.

  Her heart stopped when he set his glass down on the low side table beside the couch and leaned back to her, a blunt finger coming out to toy with a curl that had come loose from her ponytail.

  “You looked like you were having fun today.” His eyes were on his finger as he played with the strand of hair.

  The feel of his warm breath so close to her face had her lungs in hyper drive and her body strained to be closer. “I...uh...it was fun.” She managed to stutter out before he leaned in closer. His nose brushed the underside of her jaw as he inhaled her scent.

  It had been a long time since any man had touched her in way that was not platonic and her body hungered for the attention that only he could give. Nipples tight, her veins throbbed under her skin, her body shifted closer against her will. Her head came to rest on Luciano’s shoulder, tilted to the side to give him better access. Alexina’s body melted into the feathery soft touches of his lips on her neck and it barely registered on her that he had taken her glass of wine from her limp hands.

  “That’s good.” was his muffled reply and she wasn’t sure if he meant her answer, or the fact that she was practically crawling all over him.

  Her skin jumped with anticipation when his lips brushed a moist kiss over her neck, a trail of fire in its wake. Large hands on her lower back propelled her closer to his body; her breasts nestled against his large chest and intensified the ache spreading through them.

  His lips moved across her cheek and nuzzled against the soft skin until she responded, her head turned to meet his questing mouth. Her eyes fluttered closed on their own when his lips settled over hers with reverent tenderness, moving on them in a languorous, hungry motion.

  God, it’d been so long since someone had kissed her in such a leisurely, greedy way. As if, he had all the time in the world to taste her and to make her want. She sank into the feelings that swam up and swirled around her. Alexina let Luciano pull her down on top of his strong body as he dropped down onto the couch, muscular arms tight around her. She braced her smaller hands on his shoulders, a soft whimper as the muscles beneath her hands bunched and jumped at her touch.

  He swallowed the soft gasp of surprise she let out and his tongue slipped in, a seductive rhythm of his tongue surging and ebbing inside her mouth, as they were making love. He found her tongue and curled around it sweetly, low purrs of pleasure rumbled in her throat.

  “God, you feel so good.” The words sounded as if they were pulled from his chest, husky and ragged in tone. Hard hands squeezed her buttocks as she writhed against him.

  It all felt so good, the feel of his hard body beneath hers; his mouth as it moved eagerly over hers, hot male hands under her shirt cupping her breasts, a thumb flicking over an engorged tip. Her hips undulated ag
ainst the hard bulge in his pants, desperate for some kind of relief from the building pressure in her body. Donald had never been able to pull these kinds of feelings from her body.

  The memory of Donald had the effect of ice-cold water on Alexina’s senses. She stiffened in Luciano’s arms, her body rigid and tore her mouth from his. Luciano didn’t seem to notice, his mouth still moving down her neck, towards the collar of her shirt.

  His hands thrust up the hem of her t-shirt and she forced herself away from him, body still thrumming with desire. Hard to breathe with his hands still on her, branding her with their heat, she stood, walking to the window. She needed to put some distance between them, He looked good, still sprawled on the couch, eyes glassy with desire.

  Hands shaky, she fumbled with her clothes, trying to right them. “I’m sorry- I can’t...” Alexina bit her lip against a bob that threatened to spill out.

  Luciano pushed up from the couch, footsteps quiet as he stopped behind her. “I didn’t mean to push. I forget that-” He stepped back when she whirled to face him.

  “That I’m what?” A widow?” Alexina scoffed, brushing past him towards the couch. She needed something to steady her nerves. She wondered if there was any wine left.

  “I’m just saying that I don’t want you to think I’m disrespecting your feelings for your husband. I know you cared for him.”

  She turned her body sideways to stare at a spot on the wall in front of her. “That’s just it. I didn’t, not the way I was supposed to.” She felt Luc’s eyes burning into her.

  “What? I don’t-”

  “I made a mistake.”

  The words hung in the air between them, like a thick wall of stone.

  He shifted, one hand in his pocket, fiddling with his change. She heard it tinkle in his pocket and had to fight back a smile. He’d done the same thing in school.

  “You told me that you never make mistakes. They’re learning experiences.” He stared at her now, as though trying to see into her soul.