Sing A New Song

by Michelle Lindo-Rice

  Before Tiffany knew it, it was time for her to go on. She greeted the crowd and sang her heart out. She saw when Brian and his parents came in and gave them a barely perceptible nod. During the performance, she even gave Brian a shout-out, which seemed to brighten him up a bit. Tiffany sang ten songs before closing out to a standing ovation.

  She felt good knowing that tonight had been a success.

  The deejay took over and started pumping out some solid tunes. Tiffany quickly changed before she and Darnell hit the dance floor. She saw Ryan and Patricia getting their groove on. They were grinding each other so close that it looked as if they were doing it on the dance floor.

  Tiffany did not understand how they could be behaving like that with their son present. Tiffany knew she could not dance like that with Karlie watching.

  Patricia looked her way, and Tiffany motioned to Brian. She must have gotten the hint, because Tiffany saw Brian and his mother dancing a few minutes later.

  Now that Ryan was back in town, Tiffany made a mental note to get a set date from him for the paternity test. She could not continue to put it off.

  Tiffany grabbed Ryan as soon as she and Darnell got back to the table. On the dance floor, she said, “Ryan, I know you are busy, but I need a date from you for when you are going to take the test. As you know, time is of the essence.”

  “Have you told your daughter yet?” Tiffany took a misstep, and Ryan had to do some quick maneuvering to keep her from losing her balance. “I guess I have my answer.”

  “I don’t plan on telling her until I have everything in order as far as getting these tests done.”

  “I know it is not my place, but she is old enough for full disclosure.”

  Now Tiffany was adamant. “No. I can’t take the chance. I want to give Karlie more time to settle in. Maybe after the holidays we’ll get down to business.”

  “Well, for the record, I think you’re making a grave mistake.”

  “For the record, it’s my mistake to make.”

  Chapter Twenty-eight

  That Monday Brian ran up the steps and rang the doorbell. This time he was sure of his welcome. Each time he’d stopped by, Tiffany had been gracious and inviting. He had made sure to call ahead to ensure Tiffany was up to seeing him.

  “Hi, Brian. How’s school?” Tiffany asked when she opened the door.

  “School is school,” Brian replied.

  “I guess,” Tiffany said with a laugh and moved aside to let Brian inside. She shivered from the cold. Trees swayed, and the leaves flew all over the place. “I don’t know how you ride your bike in this kind of weather.”

  Brian chuckled. “I got skills.”

  Tiffany pulled on the screen door, and the wind caused it to close with a loud bang. She shuddered from another chill. The cotton pajamas and warm, fuzzy socks she wore did nothing to ease the cold seeping through her bones.

  Brian made himself at home while Tiffany went to get herself a blanket. She turned the heat up when she saw that underneath his jacket Brian had only a T-shirt on.

  “Where’s your sweater?”

  “I’m okay,” Brian replied. “It’s not that cold.”

  “It’s freezing out there,” Tiffany disagreed. “You should be dressed warmer than that. And are you planning on riding your bike all through winter?”

  Brian looked at Tiffany and saw genuine concern reflected in her eyes. He gave her a penitent response. “Okay, I promise to wear something warmer next time. And I will talk to my mother to see if she’ll let me drive her car, since she always drives the Escalade to work.”

  “That sounds much better,” Tiffany said, feeling mollified. She looked at Brian to see if he was simply being patronizing but realized the young man was being genuine. She felt pleased at that.

  “So, what brings you here?” Tiffany asked him.

  “I did not feel like going home,” Brian told her, “and I did not want to hang out with my friends, so I took a chance and called you.” He did not add the fact that his mother had called him to tell him that she was going to be home late and his father was out of town again.

  That pretty much left Brian to fend for himself. He hoped that Tiffany had some food because he was starving for a home-cooked meal and tired of takeout.

  “Well, I am always happy to see you,” Tiffany assured him. “Karlie should be home soon. She is at her friend Tanya’s house, working on an art project of some sort. She has to turn it in before Thanksgiving.”

  “Oh.” Brian did not know how to reply. His stomach growled loudly.

  “Are you hungry?” Tiffany questioned once she heard the loud rumbling sounds from his stomach.

  “A little,” Brian shyly confessed.

  “Well, you are in luck. I have a housekeeper now. Her name is Annie, and she comes in every morning for a few hours to cook and clean for me. I think she made steak, mash potatoes, and veggies. Would you like some?”

  Brian practically drooled at the mouth. His stomach responded for him with a huge rumble. “That sounds good, if you have enough.”

  Tiffany smiled. Seeing the hunger written all over his face, she said, “I will get you something to eat right away.” She picked up the television remote and handed it to him. “Turn on the television. See what’s on.”

  Tiffany went in the kitchen, out of Brian’s sight, and released a little laugh. She thought about his parents. They did not realize that they had been given a precious gem.

  Tiffany made Brian a huge helping and put his food to warm in the microwave oven. “Are you okay out there, Brian?” she called out.

  “Yeah, I’m just channel surfing.”

  Tiffany heard the front door open and then listened to Karlie’s and Tanya’s excited voices as they greeted Brian. She retrieved two more plates and dished the girls out some of the hearty repast. She knew from experience they were also going to be hungry.

  “Brian, your food’s ready,” she called out before putting another of the plates in the microwave to warm.

  Tiffany did not know if it was in style, but the girls rarely ate lunch. This meant that when they came in, they were ravenous.

  Tiffany heard the girls and Brian talking. “That explains why I got no answer.” Tiffany shook her head and smiled. She removed the hot plate from the microwave and put the last one in to warm.

  “Maybe you should put your feet up,” Brian suggested when Tiffany walked back in the den..

  “I think I might just do that,” Tiffany stated and turned to go up the stairs. “You all can watch TV a little longer, but, Karlie and Tanya, do not forget about your art project.”

  “I will help them, Tiffany,” Brian volunteered.

  “Thanks.” Tiffany was grateful.

  As soon as she left the room, Karlie went inside the kitchen to get their food. She was more than a little concerned about her mother. She felt a presence behind her and almost jumped when she saw that Brian had followed her into the kitchen to get his plate.

  “So, tell me about your friend,” Brian whispered.

  “Who? Tanya?”

  Brian nodded his head and then peered over his shoulders to make sure that Tanya could not hear him.

  “She is sixteen,” Karlie revealed. “She’ll be seventeen next May, and she is graduating because she skipped a grade.”

  Brian bobbed his head up and down, liking what he’d heard. “So, does she have a boyfriend?”

  “No,” Karlie said. “But I do not know if she would give you the time of day.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because we are good girls.”

  “And?” Brian demanded an explanation.

  “And guys like you definitely do not date girls like us,” Karlie noted. She took three glasses out of the cabinet to serve them some drinks with their food.

  “Guys like me?” Brian questioned. He wanted to know what Karlie meant by that comment. What had Tiffany said about him to her daughter?

  “Yeah, cool, popular guys like you. You all ju
st want one thing.” Karlie pressed the ice button on the fridge to fill their glasses.

  Brian relaxed once he heard Karlie’s rationale. “I am not like that. Put in a good word for me with Tanya, please. C’mon, you are practically my little sister.”

  Karlie looked at Brian and laughed. “Just because you come here to visit, it does not make me your little sister, okay?”

  “Yeah, well, I heard my dad could possibly be . . .” Brian trailed off. He stopped as he considered the fact that Karlie might not know anything. His parents had told him that it was possible that Karlie was his sister and that his father was going to take a paternity test to find out. They’d discussed it with him, and Brian was all for the idea. He would love to have a little sister. But looking at Karlie’s bewildered expression, Brian guessed she did not have a clue about the situation.

  “Your dad could possibly be . . . what?” Karlie demanded.

  “Forget it,” Brian said and went to sit with Tanya.

  Karlie followed him out of the kitchen at a much slower pace. Something about what Brian had almost said gave her the chills, and she didn’t know why. For the first time Karlie wondered just how her mother even knew Brian. She had just introduced him, and that was it. Karlie had never thought to ask her mother about Brian at all. Maybe she should. Karlie looked at Brian, who was charming the socks off Tanya. Karlie did not doubt the pants would soon follow.

  Neil ran up the steps to Tiffany’s house as if the devil were on his heels. Myra was acting crazy again, and he did not know how to deal with her erratic mood swings. He hoped Tiffany would talk some sense into his wife.

  Neil rang the doorbell, and Tiffany answered. “Hi, Neil. Come on in. I was just about to take a shower. Follow me.”

  Neil followed but thought to ask, “What about Karlie?”

  “She’s fast asleep,” Tiffany replied. She carefully closed the door behind them before walking to the bed and turning to face him. In slow motion, Neil really looked at the woman before him.

  Tiffany wore a small, sheer blue robe, and from the looks of it, she had nothing on underneath. She shifted, and her robe slipped open.

  Neil’s breath caught as his suspicions were confirmed. Tiffany was completely naked underneath that robe. “Oh,” he exhaled and went to sit on the edge of her bed.

  Suddenly, the air in the room became tense.

  Neil could see her chest heaving up and down as she glanced at him with speculative eyes. He moved toward her like a cat stalking its prey.

  Seductively, Tiffany opened her robe and allowed it to fall to her feet. She moved over to him, and Neil buried his head in her abdomen. Tiffany took her hands to hold his head against her midriff.

  Neil smiled, knowing exactly what she wanted. He breathed in deeply, inhaling her scent, and began kissing her navel. He heard Tiffany moan, encouraging him to do as he pleased.

  He groaned loudly.

  Whoa.

  Neil jumped up to a sitting position in a sweat, now fully awake. He looked around his bedroom, half expecting to see Tiffany standing there. But she was not. It had only been a dream. But it had been real enough to awaken him.

  Neil looked at the woman asleep next to him. He leaned over to peek at her. Yep, it was Myra. He released a huge sigh of relief and wiped the sweat off his face. Neil could not remember the last time he had dreamed about another woman. Guilt hit him with the force of a ton of bricks. What in blue blazes did this mean? It was too late for any rational self-interrogation, so Neil dismissed the question. Besides, he had an even bigger issue to deal with right now. His “friend.”

  Neil moved a little closer to Myra, hoping to nudge her awake. He spooned her and tapped her shoulder lightly. He was definitely in the right mood.

  Myra only groaned. She was too exhausted and mumbled a quick “Not tonight, babe.”

  “I need you,” Neil whispered urgently.

  Myra yawned. She barely opened her eyes but turned over until she was lying on her back. Unceremoniously, Myra said, “Go ahead then. Just hurry up so I can sleep.”

  Neil took what she grudgingly offered, though he felt grimy. In that moment, his need far outweighed his guilt.

  Unable to sleep, Darnell opened his desk drawers, not looking for anything in particular. His eyes fell on his Bible. It was a large burgundy leather-bound minister’s Bible. His wife had bought it for him. Slowly, Darnell picked up the Bible and placed it in front of him. Gently gliding his hands across the smooth leather, he remembered the countless times he had sought the Word for comfort and for answers.

  Darnell realized it had been ages since he had actually opened his Bible. Flipping through the pages, he saw the many Bible verses he had highlighted at one point or another. A bookmark jutted out of the edges, and Darnell opened to that spot. He saw Psalm 43:1. It stated, “Teach me to do thy will; for thou art my God.” The Word whipped at his heart immediately, and Darnell stopped reading. He could not go any further for tears filled his eyes.

  “Lord, help me live according to your will. Help me accept your will for my life.” Darnell prayed for he knew he had not come across that verse by accident. Even though he now regularly attended church with Tiffany and had been at the altar several times for prayer, Darnell had not recommitted his life to God. He knew God was calling him back into the fold.

  Chapter Twenty-nine

  Tiffany and Karlie entered their home after church that Saturday after Thanksgiving on a real high. Pastor Johnston had preached such a powerful sermon that Tiffany had walked up to the altar for prayer.

  He had also asked her to sing, and when she did, there was not one dry eye in the place. Tiffany felt a completeness using her gift for God. She also knew that God wanted her, not just the use of her gift.

  Karlie headed up the stairs, but Tiffany stopped her. “Karlie, I need to talk to you. Let’s have a cup of hot cocoa.”

  “Sure.” Karlie turned around, and Tiffany ushered her into the kitchen.

  Dreading the impending task, Tiffany put the kettle on and made conversation. “I can’t believe all that snow. I think it must be about six inches already. If this keeps up, I think you may be looking at a snow day.”

  “This will be my first snow day,” Karlie proclaimed. “Sit down, Mom. Let me do it.”

  Tiffany remained quiet until Karlie brought the bubbling cups of hot cocoa to the table. “Thanks, honey.” Holding her cup gently, she took a couple of sips and allowed the hot liquid to warm her insides.

  Karlie stirred her hot cocoa to cool it down before taking a tentative sip. She was not trying to scald her tongue, because then she would not be able to eat well for days.

  “Karlie, I have something important I have to tell you.”

  Hearing the serious tone in her mother’s voice, Karlie paused with alarm. “What is it? Is it the cancer?”

  Tiffany held her hands up. “No, honey. It’s nothing like that. I just want you to promise that you will hear me out.” Her stomach rolled over, but Tiffany could not delay the moment any longer. It was time Karlie learned the truth.

  “Okay, Mom.” Karlie’s heart rate accelerated. Had her mom found out about her secret visits with her dad? Was it Jamaal? If it was not the cancer, then what was it?

  Tiffany ignored the butterflies inside the pit of her stomach and began. “Karlie, I have not been completely honest with you. I moved back home because I had something I had to do before I . . . go. My reason for coming back to Hempstead, back to where I grew up, was that I needed to find your father.”

  “Dad? But, Mom, I know where he is. As a matter of fact, I have been—”

  “Karlie, please let me finish.” Tiffany held up her hands. Now that she’d started, she had to get the story out. Tiffany had let things drag on too long already, and she needed to tell Karlie the truth. “I was a little older than you when something really bad happened to me—something that I made sure never happened to you.” Tiffany took Karlie’s hands in hers. “My stepfather raped me.”

>   “What?” Karlie pulled her hands away in shock, her eyes as wide as saucers. “You were raped? I can’t believe it. How did that happen? Well, not how, but why did he rape you? I just don’t understand!”

  “I don’t know why,” Tiffany replied. “But it happened prom night. Clifford Peterson raped me right before my mother got home. When I told her, she didn’t believe me. She thought I was lying and had made it up.”

  Karlie’s mouth hung ajar. It took several seconds, but she broke down. “Mommy, I’m so sorry that happened to you.”

  Tiffany nodded her head but knew she was only halfway through. The worst was yet to come. “Karlie, when my mother didn’t believe me and then accused me of seducing her husband, I went crazy. I started acting out. Karlie, I had sex with four boys after that.”

  “TMI, Mom.” Karlie scrunched her nose. She did not relish the image of her mother having sex with so many people.

  “No,” Tiffany stated. “I have to tell you. I can’t chance you hearing about it or finding out somehow. I have to tell you myself. Trust me, this is hard for me, but I won’t be here forever, and I—I just need to do this.”

  Karlie undid the jacket to her two-piece Pierre Cardin, suddenly feeling warm. She wore a cream ruffled blouse underneath her checkered suit.

  Tiffany followed suit and removed her scarf from her black turtleneck dress before rolling up the sleeves. Then she continued. “I had never done anything like that before. I was one of the good girls, you know. But I just didn’t know how to handle or cope with what Clifford did to me, and my mother refused to press charges. She called me a whore so much that I guess I just started acting like one. I know now how stupid and risky that was. I could have been killed or caught a disease, but instead, I got . . . pregnant.”

  “With me?”

  “Yes,” Tiffany replied. She waited until she saw the question reflected in Karlie’s eyes. “I became pregnant with you. I was young and scared, so I convinced Thomas to marry me, and we ran off together. The rest you pretty much know.”