by Kelly, Marie
Every time I thought about Kanada and what we had, I was instantly reminded that the Kanada I fell for wasn’t real after all.
Brittany moving over to me snapped me from my thoughts.
“I’m sorry to hear that,” she said and I laughed.
“Are you?”
“Yes, Alvaro I am. It took me a minute but I eventually got that you were serious about her.”
“Yeah.” I sighed with a nod because I was very serious about her.
Brittany and I sat in silence until she cleared her throat before speaking again.
“I don’t want to impose Alvaro but I want to say that I took what you said and you were right all along. I wasn’t setting the best example to our daughter. I was letting her down with my behaviour—I was letting myself down.” She began and I looked over at her.
“It wasn’t anything to hurt your feelings, Brittany.”
“I know! And I really appreciate it. I’m trying to say thank you.” She smiled at me and I tilted my head at her.
“Did you just thank me for basically cussing your ass out?”
We both fell out laughing after she nodded her head yes.
“Yeah, I guess I am.” She giggled and I looked at her.
“I will say that I’ve seen the changes, and I like this Brittany.”
She blushed from my words and moved a strand of hair from her face.
“Me too.”
Again silence fell around us until she sighed and stood to her feet.
“I’m not sure what your plans are Alvaro, regarding you and Kanada, and I don’t want to know what happened,” she said and then turned to look at me. “But I just wanted to ask if you would give us being together some thought?”
In all that happened between me and Kanada, getting with Brittany like that hadn’t really crossed my mind because I had too much shit to deal with.
But as I sat there looking up at her while I rested my chin on my hands, it was an idea that didn’t seem so bad to me.
At least I knew Brittany and I wasn’t lying when I said I liked this Brittany better. We actually laughed and talked together these few days and that was something that we never had.
All Brittany and I did was fuck and that was it.
But I won’t lie and say that I hadn’t enjoyed being here.
“Um, I’m going to meet my mom for lunch, so I will see you later?”
My eyebrow shot up at her and she laughed.
“I know. I’m on my grown woman shit.” She popped an invisible collar making me laugh.
Brittany and her mother didn’t have a good relationship mainly because her mom didn’t agree with her lifestyle. Britt lived for the clubs, fast money, ballers and all that crazy shit. And although it was fun—something I too used to be a part of—all that changed for me when KeKe was born, just not for Brittany.
“I’m impressed!” I winked at her and she blushed again.
“I think I will go home today but I will be back for KeKe on Friday.”
“Okay no problem. It was nice having you here.”
She gave me an uneasy smile and I knew it was because I was yet to respond to her request of me thinking about us being together.
“It was nice being here, I appreciate it.”
We silently stared at each other for a few seconds until she gave me a wave and rushed out of the room leaving me in my thoughts.
I stayed at Brittany’s for a little longer before I finally made my way home. I knew that I couldn’t hide away forever but I needed those days to myself.
Now I was ready to talk to Kanada—well I thought I was until I walked into my bedroom to see her sitting on my bed and all I wanted to do was walk out again.
Her eyes widened in shock to see me even though she was in my fucking room and I just stood there looking at her.
She was looking so fucking beautiful in the simple tee she was wearing and her hair was up on top of her head.
It was just a shame her beauty didn’t match the inside!
“Thank you for helping me, Alvaro.” She stood to her feet and said while fidgeting and looking down at the carpet.
“I did it for TJ, not you.”
That made her look up at me and her eyes watered. I didn’t give a fuck—that was the truth—I didn’t want her thinking I did it for her.
She nodded and then looked around my room before her eyes landed on me again.
“I’m sorry Alvaro, I was afraid to tell you because I thought you wouldn’t want us to stay here anymore because of KeKe. I didn’t want you to think that I would do anything to hurt her. Plus I thought if I didn’t talk about it, it didn’t happen.” Kanada said and stared up at me like I had something to say but I didn’t.
That shit was too little, too fucking late.
I had shown her who the fuck I was and she should have known that I wouldn’t judge her for that shit.
“I promise that was the only thing I never told you. Everything else was true, Alvaro.”
I raised an eyebrow at her.
She sounded so sure, but she sounded just as sure when she told me there wasn’t anything she was hiding from me! Now all of a sudden, that was the only thing that she was.
So was it nothing or one thing?
“Look, Ma told me that she told you about Terrence. Y’all need to talk; he wants TJ.”
“Wants TJ?” She frowned in confusion.
Terrence expressed wanting to take TJ back to Boston and away from Kanada. He told me about the shit she had been doing in Boston and that was why he asked her to leave. At this point, I didn’t know what to believe but I was going to stay out of it.
That was for them to sort out, and for Terrence to explain to her because I wasn’t going to.
“You need to call him, Kanada. That’s between y’all, not me.”
I took the paper from my wallet that had his number on it and handed it to her.
Kanada took the paper from me and looked at it before her eyes landed on me again.
“Good luck with all that,” I said and her mouth dropped.
“Alvaro. I-I’m sorry. Please forgive me!”
“Forgive what, Kanada? I don’t know who you fucking are! You lied to me about something so simple like that, I don’t know what to trust again.”
“I made a mistake!”
“Tell me this Kanada. If your baby daddy forced you into the streets, why the fuck would you do that shit again? When that nigga approached you, you should have told him to fuck himself. Why the fuck did you agree, if it was something you were running away from?”
Her mouth opened but nothing came out.
“Tell me that!”
Because the shit made no fucking sense to me!
If a motherfucker forced me to do some shit that I didn’t want to, the last thing I would do is put myself back into that shit. I don’t care how desperate I was.
“I made a mistake Alvaro. I wasn’t even thinking straight.”
I sighed and shook my head.
“It’s all good, Kanada. I’m not even mad. That’s your business now.”
“Alvaro, please! I love you!”
Tears flowed down her face and it started to tug at my heart strings.
“Kanada, I’m tired, I just want to go to sleep.”
“But what about us?”
“Shorty, we can’t be together.”
She gasped sharply and just stood there staring at me with wide eyes as tears fell from them.
It pained me to see her like that but at the same time, it didn’t because I didn’t do this. There was too much shit going on around me for me to focus on what was the truth or not.
“You have too much going on with you, ma. And I do too.” I let her know.
Plus, I couldn’t wrap my mind around what her baby father told me. On top of that, I was having a hard time believing that she would go back and do the same thing she claimed was forced on her. And her just saying she made a bad decision wasn’t good enough for me.
“You need to focus on TJ and do what’s best for him. And I gotta focus on KeKe.”
Her head dropped, and she used her hands to wipe the tears off her face.
“Okay.” She mumbled still with her head down.
Without saying another word to me, she walked past me and out of my room.
“Fuck!” I hissed under my breath when the door closed behind her.
I was conflicted as fuck but I knew that we wouldn’t stand a chance because I couldn’t trust her.
Walking over to my bed, I laid back on it and stared at the ceiling.
Sometime passed and my attention was pulled when I heard my phone receive a message. I pushed my hand into pocket and pulled it out.
Britt: I just wanted to let you know that I meant what I said, Alvaro. I hope you will give it some thought about us.
I read the message and sighed.
After she first mentioned it, I still hadn’t answered her back. I couldn’t really say why I hadn’t. Maybe a small part of me that still loved Kanada didn’t want to admit that we were over, but now after having that conversation, I knew that we were.
Getting into something so soon with Brittany was the last thing on my mind. However, was I supposed to just stay alone?
Sighing out again, I decided to message her back.
Me: We can talk Britt.
Britt: Thank you, Alvaro! That’s all I ask. I love you, I really do!
My eyes went from my phone to the ceiling for a few seconds before I sent her a message back.
Alvaro and Kanada were over!
6
Jashawn ‘Surge’ Ramsey
The Next Morning
“Ahhhhh fuck. Shit Dior.” I hissed as I pounded her from the back.
“Hmmmm Shawwnnnn.” She whimpered throwing her ass back.
I gripped her waist almost digging my nails into her skin and continued to stroke her deeply.
“Ohhhh, shit!” Dior cried and then I felt her pussy clamp down on my dick, sending my eyes rolling.
I bit into my bottom lip and slapped her ass. I leaned back a little to watch my dick sliding in and out of her goodness. My dick glistened in her juices.
Leaning forward, I ran my tongue down the center of her back and up again before I gently bit down on her shoulder causing her to groan out.
I gripped her hair with one hand and bounced her on my dick until I finally came deep inside of her.
“Fuckkkk, damn.”
My body fell against her back.
We panted heavily before I kissed her shoulder and slowly pulled my dick out of her. Tired, I dropped on the bed and draped an arm across my face.
Dior crawled over to me and I pulled her onto my chest.
We laid staring into each other’s eyes and I smiled while pushing her wet hair away from her face.
A nigga fucked up believing that she was playing me and I almost lost her, but I was glad that she gave me another chance.
“I’m so blessed to have you.” I told her and she smiled.
“We are blessed to have each other.” She corrected me and then kissed my lips.
“I wish I could stay in bed with you all day.”
She giggled.
“I like walking thanks.”
I laughed.
She knew like I did that if I could keep her in bed all day, I was gonna fuck the shit out of her.
Dior kissed my lips again and then she rolled off the bed.
I chuckled when she tried waking on wobbly legs. She looked like Bambi.
“Shut up, Jashawn.” She sassed with her back to me and I laughed.
“Have you heard from your dad?”
My question made her turn to look at me.
“No, but I know that he won’t call. His pride will stop that but it’s okay. I made my choice.” She smiled at me.
“Dior-”
“Jashawn, he did this not me. I’m good either way. He wanted to blame you for my brother’s death when it was us that failed him.”
I climbed off the bed, walked over to her and pulled her into my arms.
“You could never fail anybody.” I told her and then kissed her forehead.
“I should have spoke up when my dad sent him away but I didn’t.”
“Dior, you were nineteen years old following what your dad was saying. You can’t be blamed for that.”
I knew it hurt when her brother died—after hearing the way she spoke about him, I knew that they were close—but she didn’t cause his death.
I believed it was a number of factors that contributed to it.
Although I couldn’t give a fuck about her dad, I didn’t want Dior sad because she missed that motherfucker, so I made sure to check if she was good. I knew by her being with me, her dad wasn’t going to talk to her but as long as she was good, so was I.
“Come on let’s shower. I can help with your wobbly legs.” I smirked and she pushed away from me.
“You mean make it worse! Keep your pet away from me!”
She went to walk away but I chased that ass into the bathroom and best believe I gave her more dick!
“Good morning, Mr. Ramsey.” My secretary Lavern called out to me as soon as I turned the corner.
“Good morning. Are there any messages?”
Lavern nodded, picked up some mail with a few notes and handed them to me as I passed her desk.
“Thank you.”
I looked down at the notes in my hand and smiled when I saw that one of my realtors called Tommy, left a message to say that he made a deal on the million dollar property he had been tasked with selling.
Getting to my desk, I dropped my mail down, unbuttoned my suit jacket before taking a seat and turning my computer on.
While I waited for it to load up, I picked up my phone to call Lavern.
“Yes Mr. Ramsey?”
“Is my brother, Alvaro here?”
“Um, no not as yet sir.”
Something was going on with my brother. I knew that I had been busy making shit up with Dior but I had hardly heard or seen him. Other than the night our pops called that emergency meeting, I hadn’t seen much of him.
He hadn’t been home because I had seen Ma at my dad’s house and she told me he had been staying away for a few days.
And he hadn’t been coming to the office.
I didn’t know what the fuck was going on but I knew it had to be something serious for bro to be acting this way.
Alvaro kept to himself but not when it came to us.
“Thank you, Lavern.” I ended the call to her and decided to call my brother and find out what was going on.
I dialled his number in next and waited for the line to connect but then my office door swung open.
“You cannot go in there! I’m calling security!” Lavern ran in behind the person yelling.
When I saw who it was, I frowned, hung up the phone and stood to my feet.
His eyes bored into mine and although he was the last motherfucker I wanted to see, I wanted to know why the fuck he was in my damn office.
“It’s okay Lavern.” She looked at me like she wanted to object but after I nodded my head to confirm what I had said, she huffed and walked out.
“I’m glad you said that because I wasn’t fucking leaving anyway.” He snarled and I smirked at him.
“And what can I do for you Detective?”
Be cordial… for Dior. I had to remind myself because my mind was telling me to blow this motherfucker’s face off and deal with the consequences later.
“It’s just Kevin.” He snapped back at me and I chuckled after realizing that he wasn’t here on any police business but as a dad.
I nodded my understanding and he walked over to my desk.
“I want you to know that I only stopped for Dior because if I didn’t love my daughter I would have had y’all buried under the fucking jail!”
I simpered.
“No, you stopped to save your own ass, Kevin.”
Dior told me everything and all that she said to her dad. It blew me away to know that she knew Trojan’s ass too but she reassured me that he was just her father’s friend and not any relation to her. Which was good for me, because we damn sure were gonna kill that nigga once he showed his face.
Kevin’s whole face changed color and dropped. I guess he thought that she didn’t tell me but we shared everything.
There wasn’t anything we didn’t tell each other now. I had even explained who the fuck I really was—even though I’m sure she figured it out from the shit her pops had on us—I wanted it to come from my mouth.
If Dior going against her father for me wasn’t proof enough that she was loyal, nothing else would show me that! She was willing to let the world know how her pops became the detective he was today, just to save me.
It didn’t get more loyal than that!
“Look, I’m sorry about your son, but I will not take responsibility for what happened.”
“Don’t talk about my son! You are not worthy to talk about him!”
“And you are a sad man for blaming everyone else for what happened to him, instead of dealing with it like a real man!”
His angry eyes widened and he bit on his bottom lip.
“Motherfucker, you don’t know shit about me, my family or my son, I don’t give a fuck what you heard! But I didn’t come here to talk about my son, I want you to leave my daughter alone Surge. If you don’t, I will come for you; not as a Detective but Kevin from the streets.”
I almost laughed at this pathetic ass nigga.
“My guy, she’s not anywhere she doesn’t want to be.”
Every day Dior confessed her love for me and made me promise not to leave her again. This nigga was talking like I was holding her but she wanted to be here just as much as I wanted her with me.
Kevin glared at me and I stood there looking right back at his stupid ass.
The motherfucker could come to my office to threaten me but couldn’t pick up the fucking phone to call his daughter.
“Do you really believe that I’m keeping her away from you?” I asked him, and his mouth dropped before he went back to angrily chewing on his bottom lip.