Vampire Charming

by Cassandra Gannon

  “Slade, we have to get out of here!”

  He didn’t seem to hear her desperate cry over the pounding rain. Slade heaved Fang away from him, trying to maneuver back onto solid ground. “I gave you a second chance, Werewolf. At the end of our last battle, I let you start again in another world. Look what you did with that opportunity!” He waved a hand around to indicate all of Infinia. “You enslaved this kingdom and its citizens, and now you’re surprised when they fight back?”

  “You’re the one fighting me.” Fang blocked Slade’s progress, keeping him trapped by the edge. “But that’s about to end. Once you’re dead, I will have everything that’s mine. The peasants will stop their rioting, the kingdom will bow to my rule, and Jane will worship me as her true mate.”

  Slade gave an honest-to-God laugh at that boast. “If you believe that, then you have not met my Eternal-One. There is nothing that will make her submit to you.”

  “What about me?” A new voice demanded over the pounding rain. “Isn’t anyone going to mention me?”

  Jane spun around and realized why the potent-y music had sounded. Behind her stood a stunning and pissed off woman. Her long hair flowed down her back, her Bunny Ranch body covered in a nearly transparent gown. Given the fact that she looked a hell of a lot like the blonde Angelina Jolie in that centerfold picture, she had to be Allandrina.

  Princess. Witch. Topless model.

  Surprise villain.

  Crap.

  Jane totally should have seen this one coming. It was such a stupid plot twist.

  “You’re fools. All of you.” Allandrina stepped forward, dragging Roland with her. She held Slade’s long lost brother in front of her like a shield, the Sliver Sword clutched in her manicured hand. The point of it was aimed right at his jugular. “Do you think I’ll allow any of you steal my future?”

  Jane spared Slade a quick frown. “I told you the whole premise of this story was sexist.” Not that Allandrina was doing so much to promote gender equality. Jane turned back to the renegade lingerie ad and shook her head. “Look, this is just bad film making. You were barely in this movie, so how can we be invested in you suddenly going rouge? If you were supposed to be the secret bad guy, you should have been in way more scenes before the big reveal.”

  “I was in plenty of scenes until you came along and stole them all.” Allandrina hissed. “Nobody puts Allandrina in a corner.”

  “Oh for God’s sakes, you didn’t even have any lines, until now!”

  “I did, too! Ask Fang. He’s been my costar this whole time.”

  “Costar?” Fang scoffed. “Please. I don’t even remember your name, woman.”

  “I am Allandrina, Princess of Infinia and the strongest Dark Fairy who’s ever existed!”

  Jane’s brows soared. “You’re the Dark Fairy?” She’d read some of the full frontal encounters between Fang and the Fairy in that cave. The script hadn’t included a lot of context, but it had stressed the nakedness and depravity. Jesus, she could’ve gone forever without putting a face to the writhing. “I thought you were a Witch.”

  “That’s what I want people to think. My kind are hunted here, while Witches are adored.” She snored. “If I were really a Witch, I wouldn’t be stuck in this shithole dimension. With their powers, I’d have fled to a better world long ago. For years, I had to pretend to care about this dumpy kingdom. When Fang arrived, I began to see there was another way.”

  Slade made a face. “I told you Dark Fairies were often the lackeys of Werewolves, Jane. You see? They are powerful, but cannot think for themselves.”

  Allandrina pushed the Silver Sword against Roland’s neck and the kid gave a panicked squeak. “Bro, can you not piss her off, please?” He begged.

  “I am no one’s lackey.” Allandrina snapped. “This is all my plan. I helped the Werewolf gain power, so I could drive the Light Fairies from this realm. Now their magicks are unprotected and I will harness them for my escape. Finally, I will flee Infinia and go someplace worthy of true princess.” She smirked. “Can you guess where I’m going, Jane Squire?”

  “Hell?”

  Allandrina pursed her lips at the snarking. “Close. To your very own Chicago.”

  “Wait, you want to go to my world?”

  “Of course. In a land without magicks I will have absolute power. Also, I believe you have martinis there. That alone is enough to sway me.” She shrugged. “Now, all I need is that script of yours. Witches created it, after all. With those pages to guide the connection and the Light Fairies’ powers, I can leave Infinia forever.”

  …And do her damnedest to ruin Earth once she got there.

  Jane’s jaw tightened.

  “You’ll never get away with this, Allandrina!” Roland squawked, trite to the end. “I’m totally not sleeping with you, either. You blew your chance with me, babe. And that pinup shot was airbrushed. I can tell.”

  “Shut-up, Roland. In every version of the tale, you’re a moron.” Allandrina held out her free hand to Jane and gave her fingers an impatient snap. “Hand over the script.”

  “No.” Not the wittiest comeback for a heroine to use, but Jane wasn’t in the mood to worry quotable rejoinders. “Why the hell would I do that? I’m betting Slade and I can take you.”

  “Not before I kill Roland.”

  “Did you not get the pages where Roland tried to kill me? I’m not too worried about you stabbing him in the head.”

  “That was an accident. I wouldn’t try to kill my long lost sister-in-law. I was trying to kill Slade, because I didn’t know he was my long lost brother!”

  Allandrina smirked, ignoring Roland’s indignant whining and Slade long suffering sigh. “I will give you another reason then, Jane Squire. The portal I open will allow you to pass through it, as well. No one else in Infinia will be able to return you to your world.” She shook her head. “Believe me, I’ve tried everything to find a way out of here. I am your only hope.”

  Jane’s jaw tightened.

  Allandrina arched a smug brow, sensing she’d scored a hit. “Isn’t that what you want? To go home? Help me now and I can see it happen.”

  Slade slanted Jane a concerned glance. “Allandrina is probably telling the truth.” He said softly. “I do not know how to get you back home if she isn’t a Witch. Infinia has strong barriers. Even my grandmother could not stay in this realm for long.”

  “It doesn’t matter. There is no way I’m going to let an evil sorceress loose on Chicago. We have enough jackasses in the town.”

  He looked tortured. “But this could be your only chance, my One. We could both go through the portal and…”

  Fang threw himself at Slade, interrupting the debate. No one had been paying attention to the Werewolf and Fang used their distraction strike. He pulled out a blue diamond blade, holding it up so Slade could see the ominous glow. “You will not live to see any other worlds, Vampire!” He chortled.

  The knife slashed out, cutting Slade’s arm. Blue diamond blades really were the one weapon that could harm Vampires. The small scratch wasn’t fatal, but it burned Slade’s skin like acid. He automatically staggered backwards… straight off the side of the roof.

  “NO!” Jane screamed as he disappeared into the darkness.

  “Brother!” Roland cried. Allandrina had to release her hold the kid, as he collapsed to the rooftop in a pile of deadweight and sobs. “Why?!” He shouted towards the heavens, throwing his head back and raising his arms in hammy despair. “WHY!?!”

  Fang caught Jane around the waist, hauling her against him when she scrambled right to the edge to scan for Slade. “Stay back. Do you want to die, too?”

  “He’s not dead! I’d know if he was dead.” She had to believe that. Jane’s eyes desperately searched, but Slade had fallen through the thatched roof of some building below. It looked like a stable. “We have to get down there. He could be hurt.”

  “I want him to be hurt, you stupid bitch.” Fang swung her around, leering in victory. “I hope y
ou’re right and he is still alive. I want him suffering. I want his whole body broken into little pieces of pain.”

  Jane’s jaw clenched. “As long as he’s breathing, he’ll still beat you.”

  “Actually, I will beat all of you.” Allandrina corrected. “So unless you want to join your Eternal-One, I suggest you hand over the script, Jane Squire.”

  “I suggest you bite me.” Jane shot back, struggling against Fang’s fierce grip.

  “Fine.” Allandrina shrugged. “We’ll do it the fun way.” She waved a hand towards the fortress’ decorative gargoyles. Almost instantly, the stone monsters lumbered to life. Their gruesome faces pulling back in cruel snarls, their lifeless eyes glowing red, they sprang towards Jane.

  Fuck. How was she supposed to fight a Witch, a Werewolf, and these rock-heads? She didn’t have time for this. She needed to get to Slade.

  “Call them off!” Fang held tight to Jane, as the creatures advanced. “Allandrina, are you out of your mind? Do you think I went through all this just to let you kill my mate with those piles of rocks?”

  “Oh, so now you remember my name?” She snorted. “Don’t worry, Werewolf. You won’t be around to mourn your precious Jane. I’m going to kill you, too. You’re the worst lover I’ve ever had …and I once slept with three sewer trolls!”

  “Hey!”

  Jane kept her eyes centered on the gargoyles. She had zero faith in Fang’s ability to stop these freaks, so she was going to have to do it herself. There had to be a way. Getting through them was her only chance to help Slade, so she’d…

  A noise cut through the air. Huge wings flapping. Jane looked up, thinking the giant butterflies had returned. Instead, she saw Slade, riding to her rescue on a white horse. Well, actually it was that damn pegasus, but close enough. The enchanted steed carried Slade back up to the rooftop, like something out of a fairytale.

  Despite everything, Jane started to smile. Slade just had to dust off the gallant steed trope, didn’t he? Goddamn, but made the classics look good.

  “Jane, are you alright?” He demanded, maneuvering the pegasus closer.

  “He’s alive.” She whispered in relief.

  “He’s alive!” Roland cheered.

  “He stole my pegasus.” Fang complained.

  “Kill him!” Allandrina screeched at the gargoyles. “Kill the Vampire!”

  The stone monsters’ extended their bat-like wings and launched themselves at Slade. They swarmed him, trying to knock him from the sky. Slade beat them back with his sword, his blade hacking through their stony skin. As they died, they crumbled into pebbles, the tiny bits raining down in explosions of gravel. Everyone gaped up at clash. Forget the dragon and the butterflies, this was the real action scene. Slade was literally battling two dozen monsters at once and he was winning.

  Still, Jane wasn’t the kind of heroine who sat back and watched, no matter how awesome the show. She drove her elbow in Fang’s midsection. If the Werewolf could take advantage of distractions, then so could she.

  Fang cursed in surprise, his grip on the blue diamond blade loosening. Jane snatched it out of his hand and whirred towards Allandrina. Dark Fairies were magickal and From Here to Infinia had been really clear on the fact that blue diamonds cut through magicks.

  “Let’s see what this will do.” She stepped forward and plunged the dagger into Allandrina’s chest. The Dark Fairy let out a shriek of rage, failing backwards.

  Jane followed her down, intent on getting the Silver Sword from her hand. She slammed Allandrina’s wrist against the rooftop. “Just give it up!” She was so frigging sick of all the mystical weapons in this place. They were going to finish it once and for all.

  “Never!”

  The woman was strong for a princess, especially one with a knife in her chest. She wasn’t letting go of the blade. There was only one thing to do.

  Jane deliberately dropped the screenplay. She threw it directly into Allandrina’s line of sight. Allandrina gasped and forget about Jane. She stopped fighting and blindly scrambled towards the folder, everything else ceasing to matter. All she cared about was reaching the sodden pages.

  Jane easily wrenched the silver blade free from her fingers and tossed it up Slade. “Here, sweetie. Let’s end this stupid movie.”

  Slade gave her a slanting smile, his gaze fixing on Fang.

  “This isn’t over, Vampire.” He backed away, golden eyes glowing. “I’ll have my revenge in our next tale. You’ll never be rid of… shit!” His threat was abruptly cut off as Slade seized him by the neck and dragged him into the air

  The pegasus sailed upward, higher and higher, Fang’s legs desperately bicycling for purchase. He tried to push Slade off the back of the stallion, but it was no use. Slade easily kept his seat, directing the pegasus just where he wanted it to go. Of course he was a wonderful horseman. It was all part and parcel of being a storybook hero.

  “I told you what I’d do to you, if you touched Jane.” Slade snarled.

  “She’s mine!” Fang bellowed back, still trying to kill them both by knocking Slade off the pegasus. “If I can’t have her, no one will! I don’t care what the magical book says. I’ll be back again and again and again. Let me go or I’ll make Jane suffer for the next millennium!”

  Slade hefted the blade in his free hand. “Luckily, letting you go is in the script, you bastard.”

  He let Fang go… from about ten thousand feet and with the Silver Sword plunged into his heart.

  Her Eternal-One seriously didn’t play around when it came to finales. The Werewolf wouldn’t be returning for From Here to Infinia II. Not even a movie could explain away his body’s sickening crash into pavement. It was like watching a watermelon dropped from a skyscraper.

  Jane barely noticed the carnage. All her focus was on Allandrina, who’d grabbed the script and was mumbling some wordy incantation over the pages. “What good do you think that will do you, now?” She demanded. “You’re bleeding out, Allandrina. If we don’t get you to a doctor, you’ll be dead before you…”

  “It’s too late for me.” Allandrina coughed, staggering to her feet. “The blue diamond magicks will see to that. But, I’ll make sure the Vampire pays before I go.” She threw the screenplay down and held out a hand. Magicks arced and From Here to Infinia was consumed in a brilliant green fire that quickly morphed into a black hole.

  At least, it looked like a black hole. Or what they looked like on TV, anyway. A swirling whirlpool of darkness and fog. It had to be a portal and, at the very center, there was an opening to another world. Jane’s world. Looking through the vortex, she could see Chicago. The buildings, and the traffic, and the noise. The safety of familiar things. Popcorn, iPhones, Downton Abbey. It was all within her grasp.

  “Dude, that is so cool.” Roland breathed.

  “Go, Jane Squire!” Allandrina shouted. Creating the portal was draining the last of her powers. Her whole form was withering into dust, the unstable magicks eating away at her. “I can’t hold it much longer. Go back to your land. You know it’s what you really wish.”

  “Jane!” The pegasus swooped down, Slade still astride its back. The gargoyles were preventing him from landing on the roof and he desperately battled through them. “Do not leave me!”

  “Leave him!” Allandrina screeched. “Then, the Vampire will have paid the ultimate price for all that he’s done.” She was fading faster now. “He ruined everything for me when he came here. I’ll return the favor by taking his Eternal-One from his arms forever.”

  “Stop!” Slade slashed at the last of the gargoyles. “Jane, please. If you want to go back, I will go with you. I will do anything. Just don’t pass through that portal alone. Please wait for me.”

  “I can’t hold it open much longer!” Allandrina insisted. “Decide right now or you’ll be stuck here forever, Jane Squire! What is your path?”

  Jane slowly shook her head. Slade was on one side of her and Earth was on the other. Everything she’d ever known versus th
at lunatic Vampire. This really was her only chance. All or nothing. It was the kind of risk that had always terrified her. …Until now. Jane looked between the options and smiled at how simple the choice was.

  Only one direction led home.

  She raced for Slade.

  “Noooo!” Allandrina collapsed, her strength giving out as she was defeated. Her beautiful body vanished into nothing, her magicks stopped forever. The last gargoyles disintegrated and the portal winked out of existence. Before it evaporated, the vortex expanded, sucking who-knew-what out of Infinia and into Chicago. Then, it contracted in a ball of smoke, like it had never been there, at all.

  Jane didn’t care. “Slade.” She reached the side of the pegasus, as he touched down on the rooftop. “Are you okay? I knew that fall wouldn’t slow you down for long, but it was such a long drop. Are you hurt?”

  “Jane.” He sounded like he couldn’t believe she was really there. He held out a hand, seizing her palm and pulling her onto the saddle in front of him.

  She settled on his lap, trying to arrange her legs around the horse’s stupid wings and searching Slade for injuries. “Are you alright?” She persisted, worried about his odd expression.

  “Yes.” Slade’s gaze soaked in her face for a long moment. Then, his forehead dropped to hers, his eyes closing on a long sigh. “In a thousand years, I have never been so ‘alright.’” He touched her hair, like he was still afraid she’d disappear. “You stayed.”

  “I’ve acquired a real taste for squirrel burgers.” She teased. “Don’t be an idiot. Of course I stayed. I could never leave you. You’re the only place I want to be.” She hugged him close, relieved that he was unharmed. “Besides, you told me that Infinia is my destiny, remember? And Slade, King of the Vampires, is always right.”

  His massive arms came around her, squeezing her tight. “I was right about you.” He whispered. “You are a hero, Jane. You just saved my life. If you left me, I would cease to exist.”

  “I’m not likely to wander far. It turns out I’m a sucker for a prince on a white horse.”