by Julia Amante
He rested his arm behind Victoria’s chair. “You should have dreamed this thing up when we were teens.”
“No one would have listened to me back then. I was powerless. But now”—she raised one adorable eyebrow—“I’m the party queen.”
Antonio nodded. “When it comes to parties, her word is law.”
Eric slid his hand onto her shoulder. “I’m ready to let her make all the rules.”
She laughed and stood. “You guys are nuts. I’m going to go get the costume contest ready.”
Eric decided to go to the restroom before the contest began. While in the back, Mrs. Apolonia cornered him. “Eric, since your mother isn’t here, I thought I should offer a few words of advice.”
“About?”
“Your obvious relationship with Victoria.”
“Okay,” he said, bracing himself. He knew he wouldn’t appreciate anyone’s advice on the matter of his “relationship.” But he knew that everyone in the club made it their business to butt into everyone else’s life, so he resigned himself to listening.
“She’s a very pretty girl and she’s single, so I can understand why you didn’t waste any time showing your interest in her.”
He shifted in his uncomfortable suit, feeling his back muscles flex.
“And no one can really blame you for seeing the opportunity that she was vulnerable with all the nonsense going on in her family, to convince her to move in with you—”
“Mrs. Apolonia—”
“Not that she’s blameless. After all she’s a grown woman and could have said no. But when you both flaunt your sinful behavior here at the club, you make her look—”
“Sinful?” He stopped her before she went on and really pissed him off. “Not that it’s any of your business, but there’s nothing sinful going on. She and I work together, and though we live together, too, she has her bedroom and I have mine.”
“I’m not naive, Eric. And Susana saw you together at your high school reunion.”
“You didn’t let me finish. I was going to say that even though our relationship has been platonic to this point, I’m not about to let how things look to others stop me from pursuing a woman I’m definitely interested in.”
“I think that’s extremely selfish of you.”
“Hey.” Victoria came up behind him. “We’re about to start the contest.” She smiled, her gaze bouncing back and forth between them. “What’s going on?”
“Nothing,” Eric said. He smiled at the older woman. “Nice chatting with you.”
Mrs. Apolonia shook her head and walked away.
Victoria placed a hand on his arm. “What’s up?”
He hooked an arm around her waist. “She was just… giving me some advice.”
“Uh-oh.”
“Yeah.”
“Don’t listen to her. I never do.” She rested her arms on his shoulders and played with the hair touching his neck.
He smiled gently at the adorable woman who always made him feel better about everything. “What if she might be right?”
“Highly doubtful.”
“She thinks I’m making you look bad. That I’m taking advantage of you.”
She smiled. “Well, you haven’t yet, but a girl can hope that you might soon.”
He wanted to smile again but couldn’t. He released her, stepping back and leaning his butt on a rectangular table. “Vicki, I know you probably have the same thoughts going through your head.”
“What thoughts?”
He gripped the edge of the table with both hands. “That you shouldn’t get involved with me. That I can’t offer you anything permanent. That—”
“I haven’t had those thoughts at all.”
“Vicki, let me be honest. I wasn’t planning on coming back home and falling in love with anyone. Not even you. But I think I am.”
She stared at him, a pink flush appearing on her cheeks. Her expression told him she was surprised and maybe uncomfortable with his admission.
“And I’m having a hard time having to justify that to anyone. Even you.”
“Justify?”
“Yeah. I love you. And I don’t want to explain why or how it happened or defend it or make promises that I’m not sure I can keep.”
She still looked stunned. “I’m not asking for any of that.”
He released a breath from deep in his chest. Pushing off the table, uncomfortable in this ridiculous costume, he took a step toward her again. “I feel like everyone is waiting for me to make a grand statement about my intentions regarding you. My mom, your mom, our so-called friends, people at this club.”
“Me?”
“Not so much you.” He reached for her, placing the palm of his hand against the side of her face and caressing her cheekbone with his thumb. “Although I know the fact that I’ll probably have to leave bothers you.”
“Well, yes. To be honest, it does. But I like you and we’re… involved, so of course I don’t want you to go. That’s natural, isn’t it?”
Her words made him feel instantly better. Of course it was natural. And it showed she cared, which was amazingly wonderful. “Yes.”
“And I promise, I’m not waiting for any declaration, even the one you just made.”
“But the truth is, I do love you, Victoria.”
She looked away, making his hand fall from her face.
“Neither one of us has to do anything about it,” he added quickly. “Love is a feeling that doesn’t really require any action. I’ll love you whether I stay or go. Whether our relationship grows or doesn’t.” He tucked her hair behind her ear and brought her eyes back to connect with his. “I told you before that I think I loved you even when we were teens. I love you differently now. Deeper. More intensely. And I don’t think that’ll ever change.”
She touched his chest, laying her hand flat over his heart. “You say these things, these amazing things. And you make grand, sweet gestures that make me want to close my eyes to reality and strip down to nothing in front of you.”
He arched an eyebrow. “Don’t let me stop you.”
She smiled. “I mean strip down emotionally, and mentally, and yes, physically. Just give you everything. I’ve never felt like this before, Eric, and I don’t know what to do about it.”
His heart pounded and he was sure she could feel it. He pulled her into an embrace. “You don’t have to do anything.” She felt great in his arms.
“Neither do you,” she said, looking up at him. “Don’t let Mrs. Apolonia get to you. I really don’t give a shit what she thinks about me.”
Eric cared. He cared a lot, and it pissed him off that anyone would dare say anything negative about Victoria. But he had a feeling that Mrs. Apolonia would always find things to criticize others about. “You’re right. Let’s just enjoy what’s happening between us and not try to define it.”
“Agreed.” She kissed him softly.
He hurried to the restroom, while she waited for him. Then they headed back to the main hall together and participated in the costume contest. Neither of them won, but he didn’t care. He felt like a winner no matter what. And aside from that old woman trying to ruin his night, he had a blast.
Victoria made some coffee when they got home. Eric followed her into the kitchen. “Wait,” he said, and took off her apron, making her drop her robe, then he reattached the apron. “Now the costume looks the way it’s supposed to look.” He sat at the breakfast table and watched her prepare the coffee.
Victoria enjoyed the way he looked at her. She’d never considered herself much to look at. Lots of women were overweight and still felt sexy, but she never had. Her weight had been a barrier between her and men. But Eric had made her feel beautiful from day one. She filled his coffee cup and placed it on the table. He reached across and ran his hands up the back sides of her thighs.
“Congratulations,” he said. “You’ve reached your goal. You’re officially hot.”
As he continued to touch her, she knew she didn
’t want it to end here tonight. He’d actually told her that he loved her. She’d been speechless. How had life taken away a boy who was her friend and returned this man who left her breathless? A part of her knew that she loved him, too. She couldn’t say that she always had. Of course she hadn’t. What she loved about Eric was his passion for taking something ugly and broken down, and fixing it with his care and patience and loving attention until it slowly transformed into a thing of beauty. He saw the potential hidden within that others didn’t. She loved that he could be strong and determined yet vulnerable. A fighter and defender of his dreams, while at the same time bowing his head with remorse for the pain he caused others. These were all part of the man he’d become—that hadn’t existed the last time she’d known him. So this love she felt was new and fresh and something she couldn’t voice, because she didn’t know how to put all those feelings into words.
But she did know that she wanted him. At least for tonight. And she wanted him to know that. Finding the strength to be bold, she straddled him, her short dress riding up her thighs.
Eric groaned and his hands continued up the back of her legs to cup her bottom. Victoria leaned into him and pressed her lips to his. He pulled her intimately against his body. She wanted to get lost in all the sensations, in her emotions for him, in the relationship that had somehow blossomed into something beautiful and unexpected. “Eric,” she whispered against his lips.
“You’re gorgeous, Victoria.”
“Let’s take these costumes off,” she said.
“But we’re supposed to be dating before we—”
“I don’t give a shit about those dates. We’re way beyond that.”
He pulled his hands from under her dress and untied her apron, leaving nothing but the flimsy white dress. Then, a fraction of an inch at a time, he lifted the white dress over her head, leaving her in her bra and panties. His breath grew harsher.
She began to help him out of his tight costume. The top part came off in one piece, and she stared at his gorgeous bare chest. Tan, hard, with a narrow line of hair that ran between his abs and below his belly button.
He caressed her back, and she his shoulders. His thumbs hooked onto the back of her bra and unsnapped it. She inhaled and closed her eyes. Softly his fingers slipped the straps down her shoulders. Even before the bra hit her lap, his hands were on her breasts. She leaned into his touch, lowered her head and kissed down his jaw to his neck. On the outside he was strong and rough, but inside he was gentle and loving. And he was hers. She was claiming him tonight.
“I can’t believe this is happening,” she breathed into his ear.
His right hand fisted in her hair and pulled her head back, taking her mouth passionately. His tongue delving hotly into hers, sparking dark, erotic thoughts of the pleasurable things they could do for each other without ever leaving the kitchen.
He broke away, kissing and nibbling down her neck until he reached her breasts. Arching her backward, he claimed her nipples, one then the other. The roughness of his stubble rubbed against the delicate skin, inflaming the liquid heat inside her.
“Oh, Eric,” she moaned. One hand clung to his shoulder, the other worked its way down their bodies, unsnapping the top button of his pants.
“Victoria,” he said against her breast, as he let one of her throbbing nipples slip from his mouth. “Man, Victoria. Oh, man, you’re beautiful.”
She reached for his face, framing it with her hands, bringing his lips up to hers. “I want to make love to you.”
“I want to make love to you, too,” he said.
She slipped off his lap and took his hand. He didn’t question her but followed her down the hall. When they got to her bedroom, she pulled him inside. She was glad they had decided not to label what they felt for each other or to question where things were going. It gave her the freedom to just enjoy him and what they had. As they spent the remainder of the night in each other’s arms, she didn’t have to debate with herself if she was doing the right thing or wonder how long this would last. Nothing mattered, except the natural expression of love between two people who wanted to be together. Life could sometimes be that simple.
Chapter Nineteen
Jaqueline didn’t want the cruise to end. Tomorrow the ship would dock in Long Beach, and the peace and happiness she’d felt the last two weeks would vanish. She’d have to face her life again.
Lucia couldn’t wait to get home and see Antonio, although she had had a blast. While Jaqueline spent many hours on the deck of the ship simply thinking, Lucia participated in as many ship activities as she could. She’d painted and sculpted, played bingo, gone to aerobics classes with women half her age. Every night they shared dinner and a show together, but during the days, they did their own thing.
Jaqueline finally finished reading all the books she bought. They helped her tremendously. And she realized something very important: No matter what, she couldn’t turn back the clock. Of course, she knew that in the logical sense, but she had been considering picking up her childhood goals and continuing with them as if she hadn’t lived a lifetime between then and now. How ridiculous that would be. She didn’t want to be a photographer anymore. She had no dreams of seeing her photographs in magazines. What did that really matter? What she really wanted was to have what she had: a family that needed her. Sadly, she had to accept that they didn’t need her in the same way anymore. She’d done her job and she’d done it well. And her reward had to be watching her girls tackle life on their own.
Lucia, who had been swimming laps, finished and sat beside Jaqueline. “Oh, that felt so good.”
Jaqueline smiled. The day was beautiful. Warm and cloudless. The ship seemed to barely sway at all.
“You look sad,” Lucia said.
“I was just thinking about… I don’t know, the girls.”
“Excited to see them? Well, Victoria at least?”
“I am, but I was thinking not of seeing them, but about a lifetime of raising them. I swear, Lucia, I can still remember how they smelled when they were tiny, pudgy babies.”
Lucia smiled. “Nothing like the smell of a sweet baby.”
“No, nothing. And holding them in my arms, especially late at night when it was just me and them, was magical. Looking into their eyes as I fed them from my body while swearing I’d protect them and love them forever.”
“I sang to Eric and he giggled and reached for my nose. He was probably trying to get me to shut up.”
Jaqueline inhaled a shaky breath. “I was their whole world back then. They didn’t want to be separated from me for a second. When Victor picked them up, they screamed and cried. Both of them. And the second I took them into my arms again, they calmed down and the world was right.”
“Eric was the same. Used to make Antonio so mad.” She chuckled. “He felt that Eric was a boy and was supposed to want to follow him around instead of me. Antonio didn’t understand that it takes time for little guys to turn into men and that they need their mamies during those few years.”
“When do we start losing them?”
“Oh, Jaqueline,” Lucia said, sounding so strong. So unlike the woman who cried every day when Eric first left. She’d gotten stronger.
“No, really. When does it happen? When we send them to school? I cried more than they did when I had to leave them the first time. Especially with Victoria. She held on to my hand so tightly and she begged me not to leave her.” Jaqueline’s eyes filled with tears all over again. “It was the most painful experience of my life at that point.”
Lucia reached across and took her hand. “It happens a little at a time, I guess. Little by little we become less important in their lives. But it’s a good thing. I remember the first time Eric didn’t want me to kiss him good-bye in school. My heart shriveled up inside me and I thought I would die. I went home and cried on Antonio’s shoulder.” She laughed. “My little baby was becoming a boy, and I didn’t know how to deal with it.”
“And what about
when they become teenagers and don’t even want to be seen with you?” Jaqueline added.
“You want to slap them silly and remind them that you were the one who changed their dirty diapers.”
Jaqueline somehow found it inside herself to laugh. “God, it all happened so fast.”
“Too fast,” Lucia agreed.
They were silent for a few moments.
“The first time I kissed Eric and felt bristles on his face, I was heartbroken. He was turning into a man. He was no longer a baby or even a boy. I tried to hold on to that boy and I think I drove him away.”
“No,” Jaqueline said.
“Yes, I did, Jaqui. I wasn’t the sole reason he left, but I was part of it. He needed to become his own man away from me and Antonio, and our demands. I see that now.”
“It’s not easy to let go.”
“It’s impossible.”
Jaqueline agreed. “And yet we have to. I can’t live with my heart lodged in my throat anymore. I’m not the mother of little girls. I’m going to be the mother of a doctor and of an interior designer. Two competent, beautiful women who will want to get married and have children of their own.”
“We’ve done good, huh?”
Tears fell from Jaqueline’s eyes, off her lashes and onto her lap. This was almost as painful as the first day of school. “We have.”
Victor intended to call Victoria two weeks ago, but he’d gotten so busy he hadn’t had the chance. He hadn’t even been able to attend the Halloween event at the club. Not that he cared to go to that silly thing. Halloween had nothing to do with Argentina, so he didn’t know why they bothered with all the craziness. But he’d wanted to drop by the club to talk to Victoria.
He sat in his office in La Parilla, reached for the phone, and dialed her cell.
She picked up immediately after the first ring. “Dad?”
“Ah, yeah.”
“Is anything wrong?”
“No, nothing,” he said. “I wanted to…” Apologizing wasn’t easy for him. He didn’t know what to say. “Do you want to come have lunch here at the restaurant today? To talk.”