by J. R. Bonham
When she was sure that Louise had gone, she got back into Mike’s car.
“You’ll have to take me back. I wouldn’t be able to concentrate on the play. I’m so sorry!”
He took her back to her car at Sheila’s house.
“If you have any trouble, you must ring me. I will wait. For hours if I need to.”
His mobile phone was very new. He had only just received it from work a few days before and he gave her the number. He dropped her off and waited, as he said he would. She went home and Louise was already home. Jan was nervous as she went in through the front door. It was very quiet.
“You’re home earlier than I thought you would be,” Geoff said to her.
“Yes, it wasn’t very good.” This was all she could think of saying. Geoff carried on watching the television, so Jan went upstairs to Louise’s room.
“If you don’t tell Dad, I will!” Was the first thing that Louise said to her mother. “What on earth do you think you’re doing? Seeing another man behind Dad’s back? Cheating on him?”
“It’s not like that,” Jan lied. But she knew that she would have to come clean to Geoff, as Louise had given her the ultimatum. She grabbed the nettle and went and told him she had been out that evening with Mike, from the holiday.
“Remember him? He was down this way with his work and wondered if I wanted to go out for a drink.”
“What!” he shouted. “He wanted to see you and not us both? What does that tell me? You’re cheating on me?” This was Geoff’s reaction which Jan quite expected.
“No!” she lied. ‘One must lie under certain circumstances and at times when one can’t do anything about them. I remember that as a good line from the book, To Kill a Mockingbird!’
“Are you sleeping with him?”
“Of course not!” Indignant. ‘Not for the want of trying!’
“Well, you must tell him to get lost. Tell him not to come and see you again. Tell him you don’t want to know. I shall monitor all your calls from now on and keep a watchful eye on you. It’s time you got a job to keep you out of any more trouble.”
“I’ll go to the job centre again tomorrow. And I’ll tell him not to call,” she promised. She had her fingers crossed behind her back.
She went to her bedroom and found writing paper and envelopes and started writing a letter to Mike.
‘God, I’m so weak. Why don’t I stand up for myself? It’s easier to just write to Mike and tell him. I shall have to send him back his CDs as well.’
She made a parcel of all the presents he had given her over the weeks and sent them back to him at his work with a letter. Such a very sad letter.
Mike went to work and found the parcel on his desk. He opened it tentatively and looked at the letter first, but somehow he knew. He just knew. He was absolutely devastated. All their plans, all for nothing. He couldn’t concentrate at all. He had to go out to the Gents’ in case anyone saw him upset. He sat in the cubicle and cried and cried as he read the letter over and over again.
‘What a waste. I can’t believe it. We had so much going for us.’
Chapter 33
Jan went to the job centre and found herself a secretarial job with a firm of picture framers. They asked her what she was like with a computer and she told them she was a quick learner. They were very kind and gave her a few lessons which she grasped quite quickly. She enjoyed being back at work again as it took her mind off things and enabled her to put all thoughts of moving away to the back of her mind. And being with Mike. She hoped he would understand that it wasn’t what she wanted. But she was forced into it.
Jan went about her daily routine and the weeks went by quite slowly. Her thoughts then had to turn to Christmas. ‘On no, not Christmas again. I can’t bear it. I bet Mike will have a better Christmas than me. I can’t actually stop thinking about him. That must mean something. I’ll have to ring him to see how he is, one of these days. We can’t have had what we did have for it to all come to nothing, surely? I wonder if he’s feeling as bad as me?’
She drove to work the next day but left home early. She knew there was a telephone kiosk quite near work so she decided she would phone him from there. He would probably be at work. He usually got in quite early.
“Hello?” said Mike. His number was a direct line which was useful.
“It’s me!” Jan said tentatively. She wondered if she would get the brush-off after he had received that letter from her.
“Oh, how lovely to hear your voice again after all this time. I’ve been so afraid to ring you. I’m glad you took the initiative. How are you?” he enquired.
“Missing you,” she said. She was so relieved to hear a friendly voice instead of what she was expecting.
“Me too, badly,” he admitted.
“Oh! I’m so sorry to have written that letter but I was forced into it. Did you wait long that night?”
“About three hours. I had to go home then, I couldn’t wait any longer for you. I was so worried about you. I was hoping you would ring me so I could pick you up and we could start our new life together, straight away.”
“You waited three hours? Just for me? That’s fantastic. No one has ever done anything like that for me before.”
“I told you before, I’m a very patient man. I would wait for you forever.”
“Forever’s a long time! Well, it could be. It depends really. I’ve got a new job. I’m on my way there now. It’s not really what I wanted, but Geoff said I should find a job to take my mind off you. Keep me occupied. And he said he would monitor all my calls, hence ringing you from a phone box. He can’t exactly monitor that, can he?” She felt quite smug.
“Why don’t you just leave him? I know you’re not happy. And you know you’re not happy. Just leave. Not to come to me straight away, if you thought it would cause a problem. I could pay for a flat for you or something locally, so you could still do your job. As long as you come to me eventually, I will wait.”
“If I left, it would be to leave here completely. I hate the place. I know I would miss the kids but they’ll get married and leave home one day and they wouldn’t give a toss about me.”
“Well, there’s your answer. They have their own lives to lead and they’re both grown up,” he concurred.
“I would never leave if they were still dependent on me. So it’s lucky you met me when you did. And lucky I met you when I did. Let’s still do it, shall we?” She thought she was being a bit forward and daring but she reckoned there was nothing for the faint hearted.
“Absolutely!” He cheered up then. “Are we still going to go for February time? I need to make arrangements this end. I’ll go back to the estate agents and find somewhere for us to live. It’ll have to be rented, so hope you can trust me to find something suitable for you.”
“I trust you implicitly,” she confirmed to him.
“That’s nice to hear. You’ve made my day. Wendy, my secretary, has told me I’ve been like a bear with a sore head since I got your letter. I’m so happy now.”
“Great. That’s made my day too,” Jan confirmed.
“Can I just ask you one thing?”
“Anything.”
“Will you marry me?” he ventured daringly. “Eventually I mean.”
“Oh! I mean… Er, yes, of course. Eventually. Will you ask me properly once we’re together?”
“I will. Are those the words you want to hear? Seriously, though, I will think up a suitable time and place to ask you properly.”
“That’s great. I really must go to work now. Shall I ring you tomorrow, same time?”
“Yes, please. If you give me the number, I could always ring you back. Give me two rings and I shall know it’s you. Just like we used to put our rings on the table. Two rings.”
She gave him the number and hung up after they said their goodbyes. She went to
work with a spring in her step.
Mike got off the phone and went straight to see Wendy to tell her.
“That’s wonderful.” She smiled at Mike. “I can’t wait to meet her. This is a real love story. I’ve helped you all this time, as much as I could, because I had an affair when I was younger. I didn’t get any help and consequently I was too weak to go through with it. Now I’m stuck with my husband forever. I shall never know what could have been. So I hope it all works out for you two.”
Jan rang Mike every weekday after that, on her way to work.
One day Geoff said he would take Jan’s car to work to do some maintenance. So she took Geoff’s car, a BMW. She loved driving his car, it was so much bigger and better and faster than hers. There was a lot of traffic on the by-pass, slowing her down, and she was worried she wouldn’t have time to ring Mike. She got impatient with the campervan in front of her which took an age to turn left so she overtook it – and then discovered that a car was pulling out of the same turning. There was nowhere for her to go and she crashed into it. The damage was only superficial and the car was still drivable with a dented wing.
‘Oh bugger! What a nuisance. That man is looking at me like thunder! I can’t say I’m surprised. It was my fault, after all! But I’ve been told to never admit fault. I’ll try it.’
“This was your fault,” he told her.
“Well, you were pulling out of the turning when you couldn’t see what was coming around the big campervan!”
“You shouldn’t have been overtaking.” He pointed his finger at her. Then the man’s face was getting redder by the minute.
“I wasn’t overtaking!” she lied. “You shouldn’t have pulled out if you couldn’t see what was coming.”
They argued like this for a good ten minutes, by which time the man calmed down slightly when he knew Jan wasn’t going to back down and admit it was her fault. Precious phoning time. Eventually, they swapped insurance details and phone numbers and both went their way.
Jan got to the telephone kiosk and rushed Mike’s number, two rings and then hung up. In a second or two he rang straight back.
“Hello,” she said, out of breath.
“Hi, darling. How are you? You sound out of breath.”
“Yes, that’s because I’ve just had an accident, hurrying to get here in order to have more time with you. More haste, less speed, how true is that! My first ever accident! Not only that, it was in Geoff’s car!” She continued to tell him about it as quickly as she could. “I’m really sorry, but I shall have to cut this short because I should ring Geoff now and tell him I’ve pranged his car!”
“Oh, OK. As long as you’re alright and not hurt.”
“Only my pride! It should never have happened, but I was quite pleased in trying to pin the blame on the other man! That was naughty I know, but at least he backed down a bit. He was very fierce to start with. I’ll speak to you tomorrow. Bye. Love you.” She hung up and dialled Geoff’s number. It had to go through the switchboard at his work, but eventually, he answered.
“Hello?” he said.
“Hello, It’s me,” she said to Geoff, petrified of what he would say to her. “I’ve had an accident in your car. I’m so sorry.” She continued to tell him what had happened and the damage that was done.
“As long as you’re not hurt. The car is only a piece of metal. Don’t worry about it.”
“That’s a relief, I thought you’d be cross,” she replied.
“No need to be cross. These things happen. Just go to work and I’ll see you later.”
‘He’s being awfully nice about it. Has he transplanted his moodiness to someone else I wonder! What’s going on? Normally he would be really uppity.’
She was a bit late for work, but after she explained to her boss, he seemed to be quite understanding.
Mike started arranging for a place for them to live from mid-February onwards. He had heard through the estate agents that there was a building site in Surbiton whereby there would be cottages and flats – both for sale and for rent. They had sold several flats already, plus one cottage which they knew was going to be furnished and rented out. It belonged to a man from Hong Kong, and the estate agents were also going to manage it. They would be built in a few weeks’ time. Perfect!
The next time Mike spoke to Jan, he told her all about it. It wasn’t too far for him to get to work in Kingston, probably fifteen to twenty minutes first thing in the morning when it was busy with traffic.
“It’ll still be a building site but the cottages are being built first. There is only one for rent so I’ve put down a deposit already. You have to strike while the iron’s hot or you can lose out. It’s ideal. It has two bedrooms and bathroom upstairs. Then downstairs there’s a sitting and dining room combined in an L-shape and a cloakroom. And a little garden too. It’s really lovely. I can’t wait!”
“Me too! It all seems quite real now. Only another couple of months and we’ll be together at last.”
Jan got home after work and there was a letter from Marian waiting for her. Jan had already told her about everything that had gone on and that they were getting together at last. So only Marian and Sheila knew the secret. Jan wasn’t prepared to tell anyone else in case it got out. She would tell others nearer the time.
In the letter, Marian told Jan that she had heard it might be a good idea to get away once they make the break. She suggested they have a holiday and suggested they go to Thailand and Marian would have them to stay if they liked.
Jan told Mike about the letter the next time they spoke.
“A holiday? Oh, yes, what a good idea!” he agreed. “Get away from everyone before they bay for our blood!”
“Yes, we’ll go to Thailand. Before the fireworks go off!” she mused.
Chapter 34
Mike made arrangements for the holiday in Thailand to start a week after they got together. He wanted them to stay in a hotel for the first week to unwind from all the stress that he predicted they would be under. Then they could go to Marian’s after that.
“I’ve booked a lovely hotel, right on the river in Bangkok,” he told Jan over the phone. “I know you wanted to stay with Marian and I can’t wait to meet her. But we could stay with her afterwards for a few days. How does that sound?”
“That sounds perfect,” she agreed. “I’ll write to her and ask her. She’ll be delighted I know. I’m so glad she suggested going there, I can’t wait. Did I tell you it’s the one place that I hankered after going to, but Geoff flatly refused to take me? He made all sorts of excuses. Marian had invited us so many times I lost count. It wouldn’t have cost us very much, just the airfares. And now in one fell swoop, you’re taking me there! I’m so excited and so happy.”
“Me too. I can’t wait either. All will come in time, you’ll see and then we’ll be together. And we’ll have fun too. I promise.”
Everything else was in place for a day in mid-February.
In all the years that Jan had conversed by letter and telephone with her good friend and confidant, Paula, this was the first time that Jan felt able to tell her something positive. In Paula’s Christmas card Jan enclosed a letter telling her all about her meeting with Mike and that she proposed getting together with him. She had been too afraid to tempt fate until then. A phone call ensued.
“Are you out of your tiny mind?” said Paula at first.
“No, I don’t think so.”
“In that case, are you desperate?”
“I think I probably might be. Look, I’ve met the man of my dreams, so please don’t try and burst my bubble.”
“Are you still on that quest for an orgasm, after all this time?” Paula enquired.
“You bet! No, seriously, that’s not the most important thing here.”
“So, have you managed to have one with Mike yet?”
“What?” Jan h
ad hoped that question wouldn’t arise but there was no way she was going to avoid it. She knew Paula too well, she was like a dog with a bone.
“You know! An orgasm.” It was Paula who first told Jan about female orgasms. Jan thought she was obsessed by it. ‘Surely they can’t be that wonderful. Can they?’
“No. I haven’t. That’s because we haven’t even managed to make love. We haven’t had the opportunity, as yet.”
“You mean to tell me you’re planning to spend the rest of your life with someone who hasn’t even managed to make love to you?” Paula was gobsmacked. “You hardly know him!”
“Not for the want of trying, I can assure you! The opportunity just never arose. It’s not an easy situation, you understand.” Jan wasn’t prepared to go into the fiasco of when they did actually try when it could have ended in disaster when Geoff arrived home. “The first time will have to be when we get together in a few weeks’ time.”
“Rather you than me! It does sound like you’re desperate,” Paula stated. “It’s just that I know so many people who’ve done just what you’re doing, but actually with people who they’ve known a lot better than it appears that you know Mike. It’s never worked out well. I just don’t want you to make the same mistake. Don’t you think you could wait until you know him a lot better than you do?”
“Well, I could, but he wants it just as much as I do.”
“That’s what they all say! I’ve shown your letter to Stuart and he says to be careful.”
“I will don’t worry. I’ll let you know how I get on. If I end up on my own then so be it. I’ve had so many years of Geoff abusing me, I just have to grab this chance with both hands.”
“OK, but you keep in touch.”
“I will, I promise.”
Jan felt quite deflated after that phone call. She sat down and wondered if she was ever going to be able to go through with it all.