Fireworks to Thailand

by J. R. Bonham

  “I really don’t think that’s going to bring her back, do you? She’s gone now and you’ll just have to pick up the pieces and move on.”

  “That’s easy for you to say but not so easy for me in my state!” he complained as he was becoming maudlin.

  “Well, for a start you must stop feeling sorry for yourself. Go back to work. You must force yourself, it’s the only way,” Betty was trying to be helpful. She didn’t like to see him moping about.

  He went into the sitting room and put on his special music again, ‘Lady in Red’ by Chris de Burgh. Even though it was his favourite, it still made him cry.

  Betty looked in the cupboards in the kitchen. She decided that she needed to do a shop as there was very little food in the house. Her family couldn’t live on takeaways forever as they had been doing the last few days. She had already rifled through the bins and seen pizza boxes and other takeaway debris.

  “Steven, can you take me down to the shops and help me carry the bags?” Steven pulled a face but agreed that he could do that before he went back to see Sheryl. They left Geoff in his chair, listening to his music after telling him that they wouldn’t be long and were going shopping for much-needed supplies.

  “Can you get some cans of lager? I think we’ve nearly run out.”

  “I was thinking of more sensible things like food! You mustn’t drown your sorrows with alcohol, Geoffrey, it’ll only make things worse. Make you more depressed. Then you’ll be on a slippery slope to alcoholism and we don’t want that, do we?”

  After a while, Geoff jumped out of his chair deciding to go and see Sheila straight away. He pulled up at her house and saw two cars in the drive, so decided someone must be at home. He had never met Sheila’s new man, Terry. He was the man who answered the door. He was the man who, not so long ago, had told Jan to follow her heart. He felt a bit sheepish as he opened the door and realised who was standing there. Sheila had shown him photos, but the man in front of him looked a lot older. Sallow skin and dark rings under his eyes. He pretended not to know who he was.

  “Hello? Can I help you?” Terry asked.

  “Hello, is Sheila in? I’m the husband of a friend of hers. My name is Geoff.”

  “I don’t know if she’s in,” Terry lied. He knew full well that she was in but he went through the motions of calling out to her. She replied and came downstairs when she realised who was there.

  “Oh, hello Geoff. Do come in,” she said kindly. She opened the door wider to allow him in and then she introduced him to Terry and they shook hands.

  “Pleased to meet you,” said Terry. “Would you like a drink? A beer perhaps? Or something else?” he asked, trying to keep the conversation light.

  “A beer sounds good, thanks. That’s very kind.”

  Sheila showed him into the sitting room and offered him a seat, while Terry brought in two cans of beer straight from the fridge. Geoff took a can from Terry and started to sit down, opening the ring-pull on his can.

  “I’ll have one too, thanks,” she looked at Terry with a nod as if to say, ‘leave us alone’. Terry brought in another beer for Sheila and excused himself, saying he had jobs to do and would be busy in the garage for a while.

  “That tastes good, thanks,” Geoff began. “You must be wondering why I’ve turned up out of the blue like this.”

  “Well, yes. I guess it must have something to do with Jan? Have you heard from her at all?”

  “I was rather hoping you might have heard from her and could tell me,” Geoff said. “She rang us the day after she left and Louise spoke to her. And she spoke to HIM by all accounts, with some rather rude expletives, I believe!”

  “Oh!”

  “Yes. I really just wanted to ask you one question. How long have you known about her relationship with another man?” Geoff got his handkerchief out and wiped away a tear.

  “Well, Jan told me when you returned from the holiday in America. She seemed completely besotted. I never thought it would go as far as it did. I never thought she would actually go to him, honestly.”

  “There was nothing you could do to stop her presumably?” He was clutching at straws and holding back more tears.

  “Absolutely not!” ‘What a ridiculous question, as if I would try and stop her!’

  “No, I thought not,” he began to cry again. “Sorry,” he said. “I can’t seem to control my emotions.”

  Chapter 38

  Mike and Jan returned from Thailand completely refreshed and ready to fight the world. Jan was glad that Mike had met Marian at long last, and that he was able to thank her for helping them get together. Jan was sure that without Marian’s influence, she wouldn’t have had the courage to do it on her own.

  They had been away for two weeks. Two weeks without contact with the family. Jan was feeling guilty then, for leaving them in the lurch. Leaving Louise and Steven to look after their father whom she knew wouldn’t have coped very well with the situation in which she had left them.

  Mike had to go back to work straight away. His diary was full with meetings all day, one after the other. He had to steel himself to get back into work mode. His work ethic was admirable and Jan appreciated this, even though it took him away from her for a good part of the day. Sometimes twelve hours a day. In consequence, Jan’s days dragged. She couldn’t wait for him to come home at night.

  After a few days of unpacking and doing the washing and ironing, she started to think about how she was going to fill her days. She needed a job and would start to look around.

  Firstly though, she organised a phone connection in the cottage so that the children could contact her whenever they wanted. It took ten days for the engineer to call.

  She rang home as soon as the telephone was installed. Geoff answered.

  “Hello,” he said with no tone in his voice, so she couldn’t tell his mood.

  “Hello, it’s me,” she began. “How are you?”

  “How d’you think I am?”

  “I don’t know.” She ignored his remark because she was really much more interested in how the children had taken her leaving. Although she was pretty sure she knew how Louise had taken it. “And how are the kids? Are they OK?”

  “They’re pretty fed up with me and spend as little time here as possible. Mum’s moved back in! She’s looking after me – well, feeding me at least. She was worried about me like mums do. Do you remember being a mum?” he was on the verge of tears. They would come quite often during the day whenever he thought about his loss.

  “Of course! I still am a mum.”

  “That’s not how the kids see it, I’m afraid. They think you’ve abandoned them and they’re not best pleased, I can tell you.” He battled back the tears and started to sound cross.

  “That’s just silly. It’s you I left, not them. They’re old enough to look after themselves now. Eventually, they’ll leave home. I suppose I could say I left home before the kids! That sounds odd I know, but true. Anyway, as long as you’re looking after yourself and you’re OK. I just wanted to give you my phone number so you can give it to the kids. I want them to feel free to ring me anytime they want. I am still their mum you know?”

  “Yes, I do know. But you just needed to know how they feel. Abandoned,” he put more emphasis on ‘abandoned’ this time, just to make more effect and to make her feel bad.

  “OK, I get the message. Can you give them my number? Tell them they can speak to me anytime they want.”

  “OK. Are you OK?” Belatedly, he remembered his manners. After everything he had gone through, he still wanted his wife to be OK.

  “I’m fine. I’m sorry it has come to all this and I’m really sorry I left the way I did, with the letters and all. It must have been quite a shock.”

  “You can say that again!” He could feel a prickle in his eyes and he let out a sniffle.

  “Well, I apolo
gise – again. I must go now. Goodbye.”

  “Don’t go! Please come home,” he pleaded with her. “I can’t function properly without you. I’m sorry if I didn’t treat you right. I need a second chance. I’ll do a lot better next time. Please say you’ll come home.”

  “I can’t. I’ve made my decision. You take care of yourself. Goodbye.”

  “Bye. I love you.” Geoff was still hopeful.

  Jan hung up as soon as she had said her goodbye.

  Betty had been listening and knew that Geoff had been talking to Jan.

  “What did SHE want?” she spat.

  “Just to say sorry and to give me her new telephone number for the kids.”

  Betty tutted but said no more on the subject; she was just fuming that Jan could treat her son in such a way. ‘The bitch!’ She was furious beyond anything she had ever felt before.

  Jan thought that she had better speak to her parents and her brother and sister to get their views and thoughts. She needed approval – or at least, understanding – of what she had done. Clare would be the more sympathetic one, so she rang her first.

  “Hello,” she began. “It’s me, Jan. How are things with you?”

  “More to the point, how are things with YOU? I’ve been so worried about you. You’re a dark horse! No one knew anything about this, did they?”

  “No, well, I had to keep it fairly secret. You know how the grapevine works. It would soon have got back to Geoff and he would have locked me up, or something more dire, to stop me leaving.”

  “And I hear you’ve had a little holiday too!”

  “Yes, we went to visit my best friend from school, Marian, in Thailand. Do you remember her? It was lovely there. We had to get away from all the stress we had caused. Everyone’s in turmoil, including us. I hope things will soon settle down and that the kids will forgive me. If not now, then eventually.”

  “Well, they’re not exactly kids anymore, are they?” Clare stated. Just what Jan wanted to hear. “I’m sure they’ll get over it in time. You must know that we have all been talking, so I just wanted you to know that Louise has taken it very badly. I think she was expecting you to be there for her, to plan her wedding if nothing else.”

  “Well, if I was there for that, then there would be something else later on. I can’t be expected to do everything for everyone. I need to do things for myself now. Very selfish I know, but there you are. That’s life.” Jan was winding herself up.

  “OK, OK, calm down! I’m on your side you know!” Clare empathised.

  “Sorry. I’m a bit stressed out. You’re right, I should calm down. It’s just I’ve been speaking to Geoff. He keeps begging me to go back to him.”

  “Are you going to?”

  “No! Of course not! That’s not what I want. I really want to make a go of it with Mike. It took a lot of planning to get away. It’s been a bit difficult lately,” Jan admitted. “Mike works long hours and I need to get a job to fill my days. He’s lovely and I wish you could meet him. I know you’d like him. He’s so completely different to Geoff. He lets me do all the things I want to do, without being possessive or controlling, like Geoff. I feel so free. He encourages me and even wants me to have friends, to play tennis and go out to work. All these things I always had a battle to do, with Geoff. Such basic things. I know it seems such a small thing, but whenever there’s a handsome man on the television or a film, I feel now I can say that I might find him attractive or something like that. Couldn’t ever do that with Geoff around. Mike’s not at all the jealous sort. Geoff would sulk if he thought I liked a certain male actor or presenter, someone who would be completely unattainable. I really didn’t know what he thought I would do. Consequently, I had to be so careful of what I said or did.”

  “He sounds ideal. I can’t wait to meet him.”

  “I’d better go. I’ve got to ring Mum and Dad, and then speak to John too. See what they all have to say. What have they said to you, if anything? What have I got to be prepared for?”

  “Well, I think they’re annoyed by the upset, but they’ve also been trying to support Geoff. Apparently, he’s been ringing them, quite a bit, especially at first. He’s been trying to work out where the marriage went wrong.”

  “Well, I can tell you, that was a very long time ago. A bit of a mistake from the beginning if you ask me. Are you going to get married?” Jan asked Clare, to change the subject.

  “Jamie has asked me but actually we’re very happy as we are. I’m not happy to have bastards for children, but hope they’ll forgive us. Honestly, it really doesn’t matter to us. Maybe one day we’ll tie the knot. Who knows?”

  “And how are the kids? I should have asked earlier, sorry.”

  “Oh, well you’ve had a few other things on your mind, so quite understandable. Yes, they’re fine, thanks. Kara’s nearly 19 now! Makes me feel so old. She’s working as a nursery nurse. It’s not very well paid, but she absolutely loves it. Joss is 14 and starting to do his mock GCSEs. He really needs to buckle down and do some work, but he’s more interested in his skateboard. I have to say he’s brilliant on it. I think he’d like to do that as a job when he’s older! Or he might just grow out of it, who knows? He’s out on it at every spare moment it seems.”

  “That’s great. Lovely to have a good catch-up. Glad everything’s OK with you. Speak soon.”

  “Yes, you take care. Bye for now.”

  Jan came off the phone feeling quite tired. Her family had never been one for small talk. They hardly ever spoke to each other unless there was something specific to say. She steeled herself to speak to her mother. It was daytime and her father would be at work so she reckoned it was a good opportunity.

  “Hello, Mum.”

  “Oh Jan, is that you? I’m so glad you’ve called. Are you connected now with a proper phone?”

  “Yes, Mum. I don’t have to go to the phone box anymore,” she continued and then proceeded to give her mum the new number. “How are you? And how’s Dad? Is he still cross with me?”

  “Well, I don’t think ‘cross’ is the right word. He was concerned for you, though, as I am. Geoff’s been giving us grief, but like we told him, we don’t know any more than him. You never told anyone you were leaving, so it was a bit of a shock. Are you going through the menopause? Your dad reckons that’s the reason you left home.”

  “Oh, for heaven’s sake! I left Geoff because I couldn’t stand being controlled by him anymore. I’ve been so lucky to be able to meet someone who is so totally different. Mike is really lovely and I know you’ll like him too.”

  “Your dad says he doesn’t want to meet him.”

  “Oh, well, that’s his loss. What about you?”

  “I want to see you but I think Ken would be upset if I went behind his back to meet Mike. Are you going to come to Bristol and see us? We haven’t seen you for ages.”

  “OK, I’ll come over next weekend. And visit the others too, I haven’t seen them in ages.”

  She arranged with her mother times for the following weekend and then they said their goodbyes. ‘John next,’ thought Jan, ‘then that’s it, no more!’

  “Hello,” said John.

  “Hi, Jan here,” she began.

  “And what have YOU been up to, young lady?” Jan could tell he was smiling. “My sister gone off the rails and gone off with another man! Whatever next?”

  “Stop teasing! And not that young anymore, I’m afraid. At least I’m younger than you, so that’s OK!”

  “No prevaricating, changing the subject. Let’s talk about this new man in your life.”

  “What d’you want to know? That he’s so different to Geoff? That he’s kind, loving and romantic?”

  “You can’t live on romance alone.”

  “Don’t interrupt! I haven’t finished! Do you want to know or not?”

  “Of course, carry on.
”

  “Well, suffice to say that I like him, love him even. He’s not possessive like Geoff and he doesn’t have a jealous bone in his body. He’s not a control freak either. I feel so lucky to have met him when I did.”

  “I don’t suppose that you’d have been looking around if there hadn’t been a problem in the marriage in the first place.”

  “No, quite. Not that I was ‘looking’ exactly, as you say. Mike found me and swept me off my feet. We’re very happy as it happens.”

  “That’s OK then. You need to know that Geoff has been on the phone to me and he’s distraught. I’ve agreed not to take sides, so don’t expect me to side with you against him and vice versa.”

  “OK. Fair enough. I’m coming up to see Mum and Dad next weekend. Are you around then? I’ll pop over to see you and Vera. And the kids of course, how are they? All grown up now I guess?”

  “Dan’s in his last year at uni and Nat’s just about to start her first year. She did well in her ‘A’s, got good grades so I’ve no complaints.”

  “Fantastic. Anyway, we can catch up on all that when I see you next weekend. You can meet Mike too, OK?” She hoped he wouldn’t have the same small-mindedness as their father and not want to meet Mike.

  “Yes, that’s fine,” he agreed. “I’ll ask Clare to come over too, to save you time going over to her house too.”

  She made final arrangements with him, and then hung up. She also rang Clare again to tell her of the arrangements with John. She confirmed she couldn’t wait to meet Mike.

  Jan sat back, exhausted. ‘My ears are ringing. I feel so tired.’

  Chapter 39

  Mike insisted on driving Jan to Bristol to see her parents so she would be relaxed when she arrived. She had told him that her father didn’t want to meet him but she hoped he would relent and change his mind. She knew her mother wanted to meet Mike.

  They drew up to her parents’ house and Jan went to the front door while Mike waited in the car outside. Ken answered the door, ushered her in and shut the door behind her. She was keeping her fingers crossed that he wouldn’t bring up the subject of her possible menopausal state. She wasn’t prepared to enter into a conversation with her father on that subject.