“Hmmm. Sounds exciting and confusing all at the same time. So your thoughts are that you’ll keep telling yourself that it’s just a physical thing so you won’t fall in love with him?”
“Yes! I’m so glad you understand. Rachel thinks I’m nuts and I was beginning to wonder if she’s right.”
“So I take it Ethan is ok with this arrangement then?”
“I think he might be interested in more, but this is all I can offer him right now.”
“Well it sounds like you are controlling the things you need. I can’t really object as long as you feel safe and he treats you well.” Megan will make every effort to support her little sister. She has to, now that she’s the Matriarch of the family.
“And that’s why you are my favorite sister!”
“I’m your only sister.” She says seriously.
Olivia fights the urge to laugh. “Yes Megan, I know. It was a joke. Geez… maybe the next time you clean your chakra you should knock some cobwebs off your sense of humor.”
“Very funny. When are you coming to visit? The kids ask to see you all the time.”
“I’m not really sure. I’m pretty busy at work right now and I have some bills I need to pay off. I’ll try to figure something out, I promise.”
For Olivia, Monday was a day of irrational mood swings and an intolerance for stupid people. She was glad to see it end. Hopefully her mood today will be a little more pleasant. Partially closing the blinds in an attempt to filter the bright morning sunlight, she’s startled by a loud thud against her office window. Peaking between the slats, she sees nothing out of the ordinary.
Returning to her work something catches her eye as there is another loud thud against the window. Walking around her desk and opening the blinds, she sees several birds sitting on the ground outside her office window, pecking at the ground for food. With them is the little green bird. It turns and looks at her as if it knows she’s watching and flies to a branch of the bush outside the window. Its head twists in jerky robotic movements and then hovers a few inches above the branches before flying forward straight into the glass.
Olivia jumps and covers her mouth. “Oh my Gosh!” She leans forward looking for it, fearing that it couldn’t possibly have survived such a collision. When it suddenly reappears, she grabs her phone and tries to take a picture but again, it flies forward hitting the glass a third time. Frightened that it’s going to kill itself, she takes off running down the hall and out the front door. “Shoo!” She yells, flailing her arms. The minute she approaches the other birds scatter into flight but the little green bird sits on the bush unafraid. Realizing that she still has her phone in her hand, she takes a picture. “You’re the strangest little bird.” She whispers, snapping a few more before it flies away.
On her way home, she notices Noah’s car still outside his office and decides she should stop in to see him. He hasn’t talked to her since the soccer game and she can use the picture of the little green bird as an excuse to see him. The waiting room is empty and the small space where the receptionist would normally sit is in darkness. “Hello?” She calls out.
His head pops out of a doorway at the end of the hall and grins when he sees her. “Hey! Come in.” He’s washing his hands when she gets down to that end of the hallway. The smell of antiseptic is so strong it leaves a taste in the back of her throat and she makes a face.
“Hi! You’re here late.” Barking from the overnight patients can be heard from the back room and it makes her feel sad that so many pets have been separated from their owners due to illness.
“I had a few surgeries today and was just checking to make sure everyone was doing well before I left.”
She feels an unpleasant awkwardness between them that she desperately wants to go away. “Noah… are WE ok?“ She frowns at him. “I feel bad about what happened at soccer.”
“I can’t believe you left with him.” He turns to lean against the counter and crosses his arms, looking for an explanation.
“I know, I know. I should have stayed with you.”
“So why didn’t you then?”
Shrugging, she sits down on the nearby stool and uses her feet to make it roll on its casters back and forth across the floor. “I really don’t know.” She avoids his stare by playing with all the knobs and gadgets on the equipment around her.
“Do you like that guy?” He sure as hell hopes not.
“He’s ok.” She says with indifference, trying to play it down.
It doesn’t work. Noah sees right through her. “Olivia, that guy is dangerous.” He quickly turns to organize vials of medication on the counter, trying to hide his frustration.
“He won’t hurt me.” It’s beginning to bother her that she always seems to be defending him.
Noah shakes his head and ignores her statement. “We’re going to be getting some thunder storms at the end of the week. Do you have enough medication?” He glances over at her and waits for her reply.
“Yes, but I’m almost out.”
“Ok, you let me know when you need more and I’ll look after it.”
Rachel sends her a text message and when her phone beeps, it reminds her of the pictures. Now would be a really good time to change the subject.
“Hey, I know this is a silly question to ask a veterinarian but how much do you know about birds?”
He furrows his brow. “What kind of birds?”
“Little, green, stalker birds.”
He tilts his head to the side and looks at her strangely. “Ok, you’ve lost me.”
She laughs. “There is a green bird that I see outside my office window all the time. And now… I see the same bird in my backyard frequently. It’s almost as if it follows me. Do birds do that?”
“I’ve never heard of anything like that. Are you sure it’s the same bird?”
“I think so.” She scrolls through her phone looking for the picture. “I’ve never seen a bird like it before. Look.” She hands him her phone. “The markings on its chest are pretty unique.”
“Huh. I don’t recognize it either.” He hands her back her phone. “I’ll tell you what, email me the picture and when I get a chance I’ll do some research for you.”
“Sweet!” She logs into email from her phone and attaches the photo. “Done!”
The continual barking and whining from the back room is starting to get on her nerves. “I don’t know how you can listen to that all day.”
“I guess I’ve learned to tune it out.”
“Well it’s giving me a headache.”
Leaning his back against the counter he crosses his feet at the ankle and grins. “Let’s go out for dinner.”
Olivia is surprised. “Tonight?”
“Yes, right now. Let’s go to the Headwaters for dinner one last time before it changes.”
“It’s not really changing that much, Noah.”
“Yes it is. The new ‘owner’ is changing the name to Ireland’s. I hate it.”
“No, I think you just hate the new owner.” She crosses her arms in front of her and leans her head to the side.
“Yup, that’s true. So how about it?” He grins from ear to ear, giving her a charming smile.
Olivia takes a good long look at her friend. Tall, dark and handsome, what girl wouldn’t want to spend an evening with him? It wasn’t that long ago, that she asked him for more and now he is finally asking her to dinner. Her mind flashes quickly to Ethan. He’s too busy to spend time with her so what’s to stop her from spending time with Noah? Maybe the fact that Ethan will blow a gasket, when he finds out? Sucks to be him.
“Well I don’t know. Are you planning on wearing that white lab coat?” She smiles.
“Only if it turns you on.” He gives her a cheeky grin. One that would have made her tingle a few weeks ago. Boy, have things have changed since then.
“No, I’m quite certain that wearing it to dinner could be a deal breaker.”
“Ok, I’ll take it off.” He undoes it whil
e she watches and smirks. “Anything else you want me to take off?” Maybe there is still a chance for him to get her into bed.
“Why, Mr. Thompson! Your unexpected, amorous behavior is making me blush.”
He grins. “Let’s go before I try to talk you into staying here and ordering in.” An idea he wishes he had several minutes ago, then he wouldn’t have to share her with anybody.
At the restaurant, Olivia and Noah sit on opposite sides of one of the newly renovated booths and pick off of each other’s plates, just as they have done for years. He has to admit that the new menu is definitely an improvement. As the bar starts to fill up, the atmosphere gets a little less quaint and the music gets an awful lot louder. Recognizing one of the girls at the bar, Olivia strains her neck trying to get a better look. Without a doubt, it’s Hannah, receptionist extraordinaire at Aurora Technologies. Damn! She looks even better in the evening than she does during the day. How is that even possible? Olivia wonders.
Noah reaches over and touches her hand to get her attention over the noise. “Do you want to get out of here?”
Hell yes! Quick before she’s seen. “Yes. I need to go to the ladies room first.”
Standing in front of the bathroom mirror, she fixes her hair, pretending she doesn’t notice when Hannah walks in and plants herself beside her at the counter. Crap! Taking her lipstick out of her purse, Hannah runs it smoothly across her bright red, voluptuous lips and stares at her in the mirror. Washing her hands, Olivia tries to avoid eye contact.
“Where do I know you from?” Hannah asks when Olivia finally lifts her head.
Olivia dries her hands. “I was at your work not that long ago. I’m a friend of Ethan O’Connell’s.”
Hannah pretends as if she doesn’t remember and then her expression changes. “Right, I remember now. I see you’ve moved on. Good for you!”
Olivia is confused. “Excuse me?”
“The man in the restaurant, I assume he’s your date.” She gives her a pity frown. “It’s for the best honey. You’re not Ethan’s type anyway.” She tries to hide her insidious intent behind a polite smile.
Olivia’s growing tension conveys a flippant tone. “Enlighten me… just what exactly is Ethan’s TYPE?”
“Oh, I’m sorry, I’ve offended you. I’m just saying that Ethan spends his time with girls who, you know… look after themselves.” She wrinkles her nose and raises her shoulders in a shrug that indicates she feels obligated to let Olivia know she falls short of the standards.
Olivia’s face turns red. Had this conversation taken place yesterday there would be no amount of extra strength Midol that would have saved Hannah from a PMS fueled ass kicking. She hates the way she has allowed her to zero in on her insecurities and hack away at them, making her feel unworthy and defeated. “Like you?”
“Yes…like me. I’m sure you sensed the sexual tension between us.” She puckers her lips and dabs at the edges to remove a few smears.
“So, there is something going on between you two then?” Her emotion swings dangerously between jealousy and anger.
“I certainly couldn’t tell you if there was. The company has strict policies about that.”
Hannah admires herself in the mirror, then picks up her purse, and heads for the door. Her skirt is so tight that she can barely move her legs. Turning, she smirks in Olivia’s direction. “I can tell you one thing… I know how to keep a man like Ethan O’Connell happy.”
Olivia almost forgets to breathe when the blonde glances over her shoulder on the way out the door and says, “Don’t worry sweetie, it’s not too late for you to find a man. I could give you the number of my personal trainer and you can get to work on those hips.”
Oh No! She didn’t just go there? Olivia takes a moment to try to calm down before she heads back into the restaurant. When she gets back to the booth, Noah has already paid the bill and is waiting. He’s confused by the sudden look of rage on her face.
“You ok?”
“No, I need to get the hell out of here.”
“Ok, let’s go.” Giving her a concerned look, he ushers her to the door.
She doesn’t say much in the car on the way back to Noah’s office. Thinking about Hannah’s insinuation regarding their relationship, despite Ethan’s declaration that he doesn’t sleep with his staff, she can’t help but wonder if the time he has spent away from her in the past few days was spent with Hannah instead. When they pull into the parking lot beside her car, Olivia doesn’t move to leave. Putting the car in park and turning off the key, he turns to her and finally asks. “Are you going to tell me what happened at the restaurant?”
“No.”
“Does it have anything to do with the blonde with the big boobs that followed you to the bathroom?” He tries not to chuckle.
Olivia crosses her arms in front of her. “She works with Ethan. She doesn’t like me very much.”
“So what happened? You looked like you wanted to rip her to pieces when you came out of there.” He snickers a little.
“I can’t believe I let her get me that riled up. Stupid girl brain.”
“Well it was a nice dinner up until then. It would have been awesome if the evening ended in a girl on girl death match in the parking lot. Even better if you were fighting over me.”
He finally makes her smile. “Very funny. I bet she fights like a girl. Nothing but scratching and hair pulling.”
There is a quiet moment between them and Noah leans over with the clear intention of kissing her. She meets him half way, letting him press his lips against hers. She returns his kiss, reaching for him and running her fingers through his soft black hair. When he pulls away, Olivia feels nothing. For years, she would have given anything for his affection and now he’s kissing her and she’s void of the feelings she used to get. It’s Ethan O’Connell’s fault, she’s sure of it.
Noah smoothes her hair behind her ear with his hand. “Olivia, I have thought about making love to you at least a thousand times over the years.”
“Then why didn’t you?” Peaking up at him through her lashes, she feels a little vulnerable talking about it.
“Because I was afraid it will ruin our friendship.”
“You think it would get weird and awkward after?”
“I don’t know, but what if it did? Your friendship means more to me than anything. I don’t want to mess that up.”
She smiles and nods her head. “I get it, it’s not worth it.”
“I really want to though.” He REALLY wants to.
She lifts her hand to his cheek and smiles. Then, as men tend to do, he ruins a tender moment with an inappropriate thought. “But feel free to pop over and give me a blow job anytime you want.”
Olivia laughs aloud and searches her purse for her keys. Leaning over, she gives him a quick goodbye kiss. “Thank you for dinner. Let’s get together again soon.”
That evening, Olivia lays on her back staring at the ceiling, unable to sleep. The conversation with Hannah plays repeatedly in her mind, while she tries to convince herself that none of it’s true. It’s a good thing their relationship is only physical or she might actually feel hurt. Oh, wait. She is hurt. Tormented actually. Hannah’s words cut her like a knife aimed straight at her heart leaving behind a jagged tear where trust, hope and healing had only just begun to grow. Now she feels them slipping away, like the slow and constant drip of a leaky tap, taking with them what little self esteem and confidence she had left.
The next morning when she gets to her office the phone is ringing and she hurries to get to it. Out of breath, she answers. “Good Morning. This is Olivia James.” She feels silly when she looks down at the display to see that it’s Ethan.
“Good morning, Olivia James!”
She had almost forgotten how silky and sensual his voice sounds. It’s a tone that he reserves only for her and it warms her to her core when she hears it, temporarily chasing away her uncertainty and the unpleasant thoughts from last night.
“Hey!”
“I have good news! I’ve found a place to live.”
“Really?” She’s curious. “How did you manage that when you’re so busy?”
“Ok, so John found me a place to live.” He chuckles.
The sound of his laughter is contagious and it makes her smile. “I thought we’d ruled out all the available apartments in town?”
“It’s not an apartment. It’s a house, just on the outskirts of town. It’s a small little country home on a couple of acres of land and my only neighbors for miles are the four legged kind.”
“It sounds lovely.” She tries to imagine the type of home Ethan O’Connell would feel comfortable in.
“The place is vacant so I can get possession right away… but the only day the moving company is available to move my stuff there from storage is Saturday... and then there is all the utility hook up people on Friday.“
She feels tightness in her chest. “You’re blowing me off.” There is no question, it’s extremely clear.
“I’m sorry, John is going to be out of town for the weekend so I need to be there.“
“Don’t they usually do utility hook ups during the day?”
“They said anytime between 8AM and 8PM and then I need to go to the restaurant at some point to check on things there and close.
“Oh, I see.” Her stomach churns into tight painful knots thinking about him and Hannah, sneaking into the boardroom after hours for a little rendezvous.
Her reply makes him feel guilty. “I know I said I was all yours this weekend. I’m sorry.”
She feels the weight of heavy, stone walls beginning to form around her, shielding her from the emotions. Protecting her from heartbreak. She had forgotten they were there, since she hadn’t needed them until this moment. Once in place, they squeeze her fears and anxiety down to a place where they can be controlled, leaving her the ability to continue functioning with a calm and composed demeanor.
Intractable Souls : Book 1 of the Bound for Ireland Series Page 27