Secrets Untold

by Shelia M. Goss

  “I love you and want to be with you forever, but I have needs. Needs I want my girlfriend to fulfill, not some random chick.”

  “I can’t believe you. Why of all nights are you coming to me with this? Everything was perfect, and you had to ruin it.” I pushed past him and out the door.

  I heard him yell my name, but I ignored him. I heard Eric ask him, “Man, what’s up?”

  “I don’t know. It’s time to blow this joint.”

  “Let me go get our boy. I’ll meet you at the car, and then we can go get some more drinks.”

  He rushed up behind me. “Porsha, chill, baby. I was just blowing out some steam. Me and my boys, we’re going to leave. But this is not over for us. I love you, and we can work it out.”

  “Not if you insist on having sex, we won’t.”

  “I’ll think of another solution.”

  “You’re going to have to,” I said.

  “Look at me.” He twirled me around to face him. “I let my hormones get the best of me back there. I would never cheat on you with another girl.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Don’t think I’m forgiving you this easy.”

  “Please. I promise to show my patience when it comes to that.”

  “I’ll think about it,” I responded.

  Eric called out, “Cole!”

  “Look. They’re ready. Call me when you get home tonight. Love you, okay, pretty girl.” He kissed me lightly on the lips.

  I didn’t say a word until he was out of earshot. “I love you too.”

  Jasmine clapped her hands. “Aw, did the two lovebirds have a fight?”

  “What do you want? Shouldn’t you be somewhere dealing with your drunk mama?”

  “Keep my mama’s name out of your mouth.”

  “See, I knew it was too good to be true. You’re still the same spoiled Jasmine from a few weeks ago.”

  “You got that right. You think you’re something, right. Well, it took two men paying for your car. My dad’s going to buy me a car for my birthday all by hisself, and it’s going to be bigger and better than a BMW.”

  “Jasmine, I could care less. Here I thought we were making headway, but now I see you for what Danielle said you were. You haven’t changed.”

  “Danielle’s just jealous that you have a sister. I have changed. I was actually starting to like you.”

  “Liar!” I yelled.

  “I was. We’re sisters. We’re going to have disagreements. You see how me and Brenda get along,” she stated.

  “Y’all don’t!”

  “Exactly. But I still love her, and us not getting along is our way of getting along.”

  As crazy as it sounded, it made sense coming from her. “Whatever. Just stay out of my way for the rest of the night, please.”

  “The party’s wrapping up anyway. People are leaving.”

  “Fine. So don’t you think you should be following suit and leaving too?” I now stood in the middle of the doorway leading back to the party festivities.

  “I am, as soon as my mom gets out of the bathroom.”

  Kim walked up. “There you are. I’m so glad to see you girls getting along.”

  Jasmine and I both rolled our eyes.

  “Dear, I’m glad you had a good birthday. Now don’t be speeding in that new car of yours.”

  “Thanks, Ms. Kim, for coming,” I said.

  My mom walked up. “She’s such a drama queen.”

  “Like mother. Like daughter,” I said.

  We both laughed.

  “So did you have fun today?” my mom asked, once we both stopped laughing.

  “Yes, more fun than anyone should be allowed.”

  “You only turn sixteen once, and I wanted it to be a day you would never forget.”

  “Definitely unforgettable. I got to ride a horse, and you guys got me a car. I’m living the life of an urban princess for real.” My hands went up in the air.

  “Yes, you are. You deserve it, and now you need to concentrate on getting your grades back up,” my mom said.

  Uh-oh. Busted.

  She continued to say, “Progress reports came last week. I wasn’t going to say anything until after the party because I know I’m partly to blame. But we’re turning over a new leaf now, right?”

  “Yes, ma’am.”

  “Then pull those grades up, and at least make it a strong B.”

  “I can do that.”

  “I know you can. Now let me leave and round up some people so we can start packing up some of these gifts.”

  “I’ll go find Dani and Tara,” I said.

  “No need to. The limousine driver is waiting. He’s been instructed to take you straight home. You girls don’t stay up too late now. We’ll be home shortly.”

  I hugged her. “Have I told you you’re the greatest?”

  “It wouldn’t hurt to tell me again,” she said, as she hugged me back.

  Danielle and Tara were waiting for me by the limousine. The driver opened the door and we got in. I looked out the window at Southfork Ranch and embraced the memories of everything that occurred today as he pulled away.

  47

  The next morning we were awakened by a knock at the door. “Come in,” I said.

  Danielle and Tara both stirred. Tara was sleeping on one end of my bed, and Danielle had made a bed on the chaise near my window.

  My mom entered. She looked like she had been crying. “Girls, I need to talk to you before you hear it from anyone else.”

  I shot up in bed now. “What? What’s wrong, Mama?” I could hear my heartbeat getting louder and louder, as if it was going to jump out of my chest.

  My mom sat on the edge of my bed. She picked up my hand. “Early this morning, around one o’clock, two teenagers who had been heavily drinking were killed in a car accident near 75 and Greenville. Those two teens were identified as Cole and Eric.”

  “No, say it ain’t so,” I yelled. Tears streamed down my face. “It can’t be true. I just saw him last night. Cole doesn’t drink, Mom. What you heard can’t be true,” I repeated over and over.

  She rocked me back and forth in her arms.

  Danielle wept out loud. “Eric said he had some liquor in the car. I didn’t think he was serious. I thought he was kidding.”

  All eyes focused on her.

  “What are you saying, Dani?” I asked, sniffling.

  “They’re gone, Porsha.” She got up from where she was lying and walked over to us.

  My mom embraced us both as we tried to deal with the untimely death of two boys who meant the world to us. “Are you going to be okay? I wanted to go reach out to Cole’s mom to see if she needed anything.”

  “We’ll be fine,” I said. I wiped the tears from my face.

  “I can’t believe this. I was supposed to call him last night when I got home. With all of the excitement, I forgot. How could I forget?” I yelled.

  “We both forgot. Eric wanted to meet up later. I totally ignored his last call.”

  I rushed out of the bed and retrieved my cell phone from my purse. I saw several missed calls. One was from Cole. I dialed my voice mail and hit the speaker button.

  Cole’s voice rang from the phone. His words were a little slurred but audible. “Baby, I wish you could be hanging out with us now. We had a few drinks, so I got a little buzz. But I wanted to tell you I love you. I had a great time tonight, and you’ll always be my girl.”

  I heard Eric in the background yelling, “Man, get off the phone. That girl knows you love her. Hang up. We got things to do.”

  “Bye, baby. Love you,” were the last words he said, before the call disconnected.

  “He loved me,” I repeated over and over, as me and my BFFs rocked each other back and forth.

  Less than a week later, I was saying good-bye to a special guy. Turning sixteen was sure to be an unforgettable time for me. Although Cole and I only had a brief time together, I knew he loved me. I loved him too. I would never forget how his eyes sparkled when he
saw me. How he laughed at my corny jokes. How I laughed at his corny jokes. The way he went out of his way to make me special. The way he pled with me that last night to forgive him, and I’m glad that I did. The only regret I had was him not hearing me tell him that I loved him too. But a part of me knew he felt the love, or why else would I deal with his silly ways? I chuckled out loud at the few memories we shared. He would forever be in my heart. Though his life was brief, at seventeen he left a lasting impact on a lot of people.

  My mom and dad both consoled me as we sat on the second pew at the church where Cole’s funeral was being held. Many of our classmates and teachers from school were there to show their respect to the school’s fallen basketball hero and to the boy who was my first love. My hand covered his class ring on the necklace he gave me. I would never take it off. It was my reminder of the love we shared.

  I listened as Pastor McCormick preached about the dangers of drinking and driving. He was hoping that Cole and Eric didn’t lose their lives in vain. He felt like he knew that Cole would want him to share his story. Pastor McCormick said, “One of the young men who survived the crash wanted to say something to the congregation.”

  Braylon, in a wheelchair and still badly banged up, was helped up to the front and given a microphone. He said, “Our decision to drink and ride around was a poor decision. Please, I beg you, don’t drink, and if you do, don’t do like we did and get in a car and drive around.” In between tears he said, “I came up here today because I don’t want anyone to feel the guilt I feel. My two teammates are dead and I’m left behind.”

  There was not a dry eye in the place after he finished talking. Someone, I assume, his mom, came and wheeled him down the aisle. I watched him as he passed by. I was thinking, Why couldn’t that have been Cole left behind? I started crying so hard, my mom brought my head on her shoulder as she consoled me.

  Walking by Cole’s casket on the way out and looking at his cold body laying in the casket was one of the hardest things I’d ever had to do. “Good-bye, my love,” I said, as I bent down and kissed his lips for the last time.

  My father wrapped his arm around me, and he and my mom escorted me out of the church. We got into our waiting limousine and opted to head straight home.

  I remained silent for the rest of the day.

  Danielle was also still a little messed up with losing Eric. They weren’t as close as Cole and I, but they had made a connection. And Tara tried to ease our pain by listening and crying with us.

  One thing I could count on for sure, in times of distress, was my two best friends. We were friends to the end, and they’d proven it to me over and over again.

  “I say we have a sleepover and make up our faces like we used to when we were little girls,” Tara said.

  “I don’t know. Maybe another weekend,” I said.

  “Come on. What about you, Dani?” Tara asked.

  “I’m with Porsha. I just want to chill by myself.”

  “Okay. Well, I’m here if y’all need me.”

  “Love y’all. I’m going to try to get some sleep,” I said, as I hung up and closed my eyes.

  Cole was the last thing on my mind as I drifted off to sleep.

  EPILOGUE

  It had now been two months since Cole’s funeral. Getting back into a routine had been difficult. My heart still ached. I doubt if I’d ever get over losing Cole. My grades hadn’t improved much, but I was still holding on to my B. My mom didn’t pressure me. I was glad she understood. And Dion had become a fixture in my life. I was also happy that he and my first dad were getting along. My mom wasn’t too sure she liked their renewed friendship, but I actually did.

  The reality show with Jasmine was in full force, now that they’d given me time to grieve. I saw some clips from the show that was set to start airing this summer. Of course they made us out to be rivals. Then again, in actuality, I guess we were. Two rich girls vying for their father’s attention was the theme that they wanted to portray. Jasmine still had the upper hand in that area, but she was too blind to see it. I knew that she and Dion had a special bond, like me and Trey had a special bond; neither could be replaced, but there was room in all of our hearts to accept the other. Now, if only Jasmine could see it.

  The show’s rating should really jump when the producers film me, my BFFs, and Brenda on our trip to the Bahamas. Jasmine still thinks she’s going, and even after I told her she wasn’t invited, she insisted that she was. If she went, it would be on her own dime. It’s not like she didn’t have the money for it. We got paid one hundred thousand dollars per show. Official filming of the show would begin as soon as summer started. Instead of harping on the music career that I badly wanted now more than ever, I added a new cause to the show. I asked my mom to help me become a spokesperson for Teens Against Drunk Driving.

  Danielle had been dealing with depression, but she was close to being her jovial self. We both agreed to forget boys for a while and concentrate on trying to hold on to our grade point averages. Danielle already had a B, and although she didn’t want to admit it, she was glad mine had dropped down to a B too.

  She’d better enjoy it, because next year I was going for straight A’s again. I was determined not to let anything or anyone stop me this time.

  Besides, the drama of this past semester would be hard to top. If I could survive what life dealt me this first half of the year, everything else would be a cakewalk.

  I opened up my diary and wrote inside my thoughts of what has happened.

  The secrets untold unfolded into a domino effect that had my life spiraling out of control.

  A new love brought joy to my life for a brief moment. Sadness filled my life as he departed into another world.

  Although saddened by what happened to Cole, joy also filled my life with the realization I had not just one dad, but two dads who cared about me more than anything in this world.

  Then I wrote these words on the last page of my journal:

  Porsha Marie Swint to the outward eye was nothing but a spoiled little rich girl with a fascination for lip gloss, but she has seen more heartache in her young life than many will experience in theirs. The lessons life taught her will last until the end of her days. Losing Cole left an opening in her heart. Will life will ever be the same? Only time will tell. The end of one stage, and now on to the next.

  Website Resources for Teens, and Reasons Why You Shouldn’t Drink and Drive

  What happened to two of the important characters in Secrets Untold was a tragedy. It could have easily been avoided, if they hadn’t chosen to drink and drive. This was only fiction. In real life, the impact of making such a terrible decision could be devastating to all involved. Drinking and driving don’t only affect the victims, but those they leave behind. Please, as an advocate against drinking and driving, I want to impress upon you to not drink, or get in the car with anyone who has been drinking. It can save your life and someone else’s.

  Statistics from the CDC (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention):

  • According to the CDC, 3,000 teenagers died from fatal car crash injuries in 2009.

  • From the same report, more than 350,000 required medical attention from their injuries sustained in a car collision.

  • Forty percent of deaths for persons aged 15 to 20 stem from automobile collisions, according to the CDC.

  Below are several resources:

  Teens Against Drunk Driving: http://www.teensagainstdrunkdriving.org

  • We Don’t Serve Teens: http://www.dontserveteens.gov/dangers.html

  • The AAA Guide to Teen Driver Safety: http://teendriving.aaa.com

  • Mothers Against Drunk Driving: http://www.madd.org/underage-drinking/

  • Centers for Disease Control and Prevention: http://www.cdc.gov

  AUTHOR’S BIO

  Shelia M. Goss is the Dallas Morning News bestselling author of the young adult series, The Lip Gloss Chronicles: The Ultimate Test, Splitsville, and Paper Thin. Secrets Untold is the fou
rth book in the series. She’s also the Essence magazine & Black Expressions Book Club bestselling author of eight books for adults: My Invisible Husband, Roses Are Thorns, Paige’s Web, Double Platinum, His Invisible Wife, Hollywood Deception, Delilah, and Savannah’s Curse. Besides writing fiction, she is a freelance writer. She’s the recipient of several awards, which include: EDC Creation Award for The Lip Gloss Chronicles and honored as a Literary Diva: One of The Top 100 Most Admired African American Women in Literature. To learn more, visit her dedicated young adult website: www.thelipglosschronicles.com or for more information about her other books, visit: www.sheliagoss.com, www.facebook.com/sheliagoss or follow her on twitter at www.twitter.com/sheliamgoss.

  Urban Books, LLC

  78 East Industry Court

  Deer Park, NY 11729

  Secrets Untold: The Lip Gloss Chronicles © Copyright 2011 Shelia M. Goss

  All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any means without prior consent of the Publisher, excepting brief quotes used in reviews.

  ISBN: 978-1-5998-3222-7

  This is a work of fiction. Any references or similarities to actual events, real people, living, or dead, or to real locales are intended to give the novel a sense of reality. Any similarity in other names, characters, places, and incidents is entirely coincidental.

  Distributed by Kensington Publishing Corp.

  Submit Wholesale Orders to:

  Kensington Publishing Corp.

  C/O Penguin Group (USA) Inc.

  Attention: Order Processing

  405 Murray Hill Parkway

  East Rutherford, NJ 07073-2316

  Phone: 1-800-526-0275