Catt Chasing

by Shana Burton

  Chapter 32

  The last ten minutes of the ride to Catt’s house was spent in silence. So much had happened since they first backed out of her driveway, and neither of them quite knew what would happen once they returned to the normal lives and routines and, in Jamal’s case, lovers.

  Jamal rolled into her driveway just as rain began to pelt the roof. He put the SUV in park. “Well, I got you home in one piece.”

  She nodded. “Yes, you did.”

  An awkward silence took the place of dialogue. Jamal stared out of the windshield. “So now what?”

  Catt looked down. “I don’t know. It feels like we’re in unchartered territory now. It’s like we’ve said and done too much to go back, but no one knows how to move forward.”

  Jamal agreed and squinted his eyes, looking up at the sky. “I better start unloading the truck. It looks like it’s about to pour down.”

  She seized his arm. “Jamal, wait.”

  “What’s up?”

  “I just wanted you to know that I think you’re a good man. I know I haven’t always felt that way, but I do now. I’ve watched you grow into a better person in every way over the course of this trip, and I feel blessed to have been able to witness it.”

  “I appreciate that.” They watched the rain splatter and roll off of the windshield. “You know I never really thanked you,” he reminded her.

  “Thank me for what?”

  “Everything. Whether or not I was willing to admit it, I was a mess before this trip. Yeah, I had the good job, the women, and the outward artifacts of success, but I was screwed up inside. You helped me change all that, and I’ll always be grateful.”

  “That’s what friends are for, right?” She wrung her hands together. “And what about the other night . . .”

  He smiled sheepishly. “No need to explain, Catt. It was late, and we were tired. I think we were both out of our heads a little bit.”

  “What would you have done if I hadn’t stopped you?”

  “I probably would have stopped myself before things went too far.”

  “Why?”

  “Because . . . we’re friends, Catt. Like you, I don’t want to screw that up.”

  She played with his fingers, weaving them in and out of hers. “What makes you so sure that it would have been a bad thing?”

  He gazed down at her. “What’s up with all the questions, Catt? Nothing happened—that’s all that matters.”

  She shrugged. “I just . . . maybe it wouldn’t have been a complete mistake, that’s all.”

  “What are you saying?”

  “I’m not sure.”

  “I think you are. Come on—what’s on your mind?”

  She took a deep breath. “I was just thinking that maybe sleeping with you wouldn’t have been the worst thing in the world . . . maybe it would have been sort of nice.”

  Jamal felt warm all over. “You know, if I didn’t know better—”

  “What?” she butted in.

  “Do you want me to come in?” He inched toward her for a kiss.

  They sprang apart before Catt could answer, startled by a horn honking behind them. Catt turned around and saw her father’s Lincoln parked behind them.

  “That’s my dad,” she informed Jamal.

  “Were you expecting him?”

  “No.”

  “Are you going to send him packing?”

  “No, Jamal! That’s my dad. Get out. I want you to meet him.” Catt stepped out of the car into the rain, and Jamal reluctantly followed. She covered her head with a newspaper lying on the seat and raced to her father.

  “Daddy!” she cried and threw her arms around his neck. “I missed you so much!”

  Jeremiah hugged her. “I missed you too, baby girl!”

  Eldon emerged from the passenger side of the car. “We’re glad to have you home safe and sound.”

  “It’s good to be home.” Catt pulled away from her father. “Eldon, hi. How nice of you to come by.” Jamal stepped forward and stood at her side. “Daddy, this is Jamal Ford.”

  Jamal extended his hand to Jeremiah. “It’s good to finally meet you. Your daughter speaks very highly of you. I can tell she loves you very much.”

  Jeremiah thanked him. “It’s nice to finally put a name with the face. Catt tells me you two had quite the adventure out there.”

  “We did.” Jamal and Catt exchanged wistful glances.

  “But all good things come to an end.”

  “We need to get out of this rain!” bellowed Catt. “Daddy, can you grab my bags while I unlock the door?”

  “I’ll do it,” said both Jamal and Eldon in unison.

  Jeremiah cleared his throat. “That’s okay. I’ll do it. Is the trunk unlocked?”

  Jamal popped the trunk with the keyless entry.

  “Minister, why don’t you go in with Catt to make sure everything is just as she left it?” suggested Jeremiah, heading to Jamal’s SUV.

  Catt turned to Jamal. “Are you coming in too?”

  Jamal considered it, but their moment had passed. “Nah, you go on in and enjoy your family. I’ll see you at work on Monday.”

  “You don’t have to leave,” she contended.

  “Yeah, I think I do.” He turned to Eldon. “I guess you can take it from here.”

  “Don’t worry. She’s in good hands,” Eldon replied, sidling close to Catt. “Thank you for bringing our Catt back home and keeping her safe out there on the road.”

  “No problem.”

  Eldon draped his arm around Catt. “Come on, let’s get you out of this rain.” He ushered her toward the front door. Catt looked back at Jamal one last time before heading inside.

  Jamal walked back to his car and was approached by Jeremiah. “I want to thank you again for looking out for my daughter,” he told him.

  “No problem, sir. It was my pleasure.”

  Jeremiah frowned a little at the remark. “You know, Mr. Ford, you don’t see a lot of women like Catt anymore. She’s a good girl. She loves the Lord, and she tries to do the right thing.”

  “I know,” agreed Jamal. “That’s what I respect most about her.”

  “That’s good. While she’s well-educated and all that, she hasn’t had a lot of worldly experience, not the way you probably have.”

  Jamal listened, debating about whether he should be offended.

  “A woman like Catt needs a special kind of mate, and I think she’s found that in the minister. They’re equally yoked. Do you know what that means?”

  “Yes.”

  “Now, I’m not going to get into your business about anything that may or may not have happened out there on the road. That’s between you and Catt. But she’s home now. It’s time to let things get back to normal. Do you know what I’m saying?”

  He did and decided that he was offended. “It sounds like you’re saying Catt is too good for me, or maybe I’m not good enough for Catt. Is that the gist of it?”

  Jeremiah held up his hands a little. “Now, don’t go taking this personally. But we both know that a man like you would never be serious about a woman like her. It doesn’t have anything to do with who’s too good for whom. It’s about doing what’s right. I know that my daughter has developed feelings for you, but what’s right is that you step back and let her and Eldon have their space.”

  “What if that’s not what Catt wants?”

  “Son, I believe I know Catt a whole lot better than you do.”

  Jamal opened the door and climbed into the truck. “No offense to you, Pastor, but truth be told, you don’t half know your daughter at all.”

  Chapter 33

  She had never given a man flowers, but nothing else about her relationship with Jamal had ever been conventional, so why should this be any different?

  Catt hadn’t seen or spoken to Jamal since he’d dropped her off that Friday evening. The two days of separation was long enough for her to realize two things: that she missed him terribly and that she was falling for
him.

  She’d wrestled with herself all weekend about whether to tell him. The risk of rejection was always hovering near, but so was the risk of missing out on happiness and sharing her life with the man who touched her in a way that had changed her forever.

  Catt inhaled the bouquet of gardenias. She knew that he would smile the minute she presented them to him because he’d know that she was doing something for him that she’d never done for any other man walking the earth. It seemed apropos, considering that she’d never felt about another man the way she felt about him.

  She imagined professing her affection for him and him sweeping her up in his arms in a grand romantic gesture. Eventually, he’d ask her to be his wife and she’d say yes. Then he’d kiss her, and they’d get married and have babies and build a house on the lake and adopt a dog named “Bullet” and be each other’s reason for smiling. She visualized it all as she cradled the flowers in her arms and sauntered out to the car.

  Of course, this was only fantasy. Real-life Jamal would probably make a bad joke and say something like, “I like you, but not as much as you like me,” not meaning it a bit. She drove to work so full of hope and love that it never even occurred to her that he actually might not feel the same way.

  Catt pulled open the glass doors of Telegenic and made her way past the empty lobby and darkened offices down to the lab.

  Jamal was already there when she arrived. Just seeing him made her want to burst. She hid the flowers behind her back. “Hi, can I talk to you for a minute?”

  “Only a minute,” he answered without looking up from the papers he was shuffling on his desk. “I’ve got to meet with Oni and all the head honchos in about ten minutes.”

  She set the flowers down. “Should I come?”

  “No need. I have all of our figures and stats typed up in this report. That’s what most of my weekend was devoted to.” He finally looked up. “How was your weekend?”

  “Very restful. I actually got a chance to do some thinking.”

  “About what?”

  “Just everything that’s happened over the past few weeks.”

  “I’m sure if Minister Eldon has his way, the time you spent with me will be a mere blot in history.”

  Catt hesitated then blabbed, “Jamal, I think I might be falling in love.”

  Jamal studied her face. “You’re serious, aren’t you?”

  She nodded. “I said I think. It’s not official or anything.”

  “What about unofficially?”

  She sighed. “Unofficially, it could be love.”

  “So there are still secrets between us after all,” he feigned being heartbroken. “Between here and New York, I thought that we told each other everything.”

  “We did. I just didn’t tell you this.”

  “So, what’s the deal? Is it lust or the real thing?”

  “Oh, it’s definitely more than just lust. I really dig this guy, you know?”

  “And he has no idea?”

  “I haven’t told him yet.”

  “Catt, if your feelings are this strong, you have to tell him.”

  “I don’t think he could handle it. I know him. He’d just freak out and probably stop talking to me. He’s a little on the neurotic side.” Catt pretended to change her mind to make him press her for more details. “The more I think about it, the more I’m not so sure I should say anything. Telling him would just complicate things.”

  “Still . . . you should say something.”

  She moved closer to him. “Say what? That his smile is the first thing I think about when I wake up in the morning? That I miss him if I go even one day without talking to him? That a part of me has been crazy about him from the first day we met?”

  “You should tell him exactly that. I know that it’s a risk, but it’s worth it. You never know—he might be feeling the same way.”

  “So, I should just come right out and say it just like that?”

  “Yeah.” He gathered his things for the meeting. “He’ll probably be relieved that you told him. So will you.”

  “You really think so?”

  “Have you ever known me to dole out bad advice? Please don’t answer that!” They both laughed. “When are you going to confess your simmering passion to this lucky man of yours?”

  She swallowed hard and looked him in the eyes. “I just did.”

  Jamal nodded and continued fussing with papers until he processed what he’d just heard. “What?”

  Catt slid the report out of his hand and stood before him. “I said I just did. I think I’m falling for you, Jamal.” She reached up and kissed him.

  Jamal blinked back. “Um, was that for practice, to show me how you’re going to act when you tell him?”

  “No, that was the real thing.”

  “Catt, I . . .”

  “You don’t have to say anything,” she assured him. “I’m not looking for it to be reciprocated or anything like that. I just want you to know how I feel.”

  He spoke tenderly. “No, I think I do need to say something . . . I mean, we’re friends, Catt. When you told me you had fallen for someone, I assumed you were talking about the minister.”

  “Eldon’s okay, but he’s not the one my heart leaps for; it’s you.”

  Jamal didn’t say anything. Catt had expected him to be caught off guard, not somber, as he was now.

  “Jamal, is everything all right?”

  He exhaled. “Catt, there’s something I need to tell you.”

  She braced herself. Either he was about to tell her he felt the same way, or he was going to break her heart.

  “Do you remember Yvette? The woman who came in here that day?”

  “Yes, what about her?”

  “She and I . . .” His words trailed off. “Yvette’s my girlfriend, Catt.”

  Catt almost choked. “Girlfriend? Since when?”

  Jamal was tense. “We made it official this weekend.”

  “This weekend? Two days after you were trying to get me to sleep with you?”

  “Catt, it wasn’t like that—”

  “It never is!” she shrilled. “And to think I almost gave in to you.” She raised her hands in jubilance. “Lord, thank you for looking out for me when I’m too stupid to look out for myself!”

  “Catt, this thing with Yvette started long before we set out on the tour. Don’t turn this situation into a reflection of how I feel about you or what we’ve shared for the past three weeks. You know what that meant to me; you know what you mean to me, but . . .”

  “But that was then, and this is now, right?” finished Catt. She shook her head. “This isn’t right. You know it isn’t.”

  “What’s not right?”

  “The way you tried to play me!” charged Catt.

  He squinted his eyes. “Play you? After all this time, all we’ve said to each other, all we’ve done, how can you stand there and say I tried to play you?”

  “You knew I had feelings for you, and you were perfectly willing to use them to your advantage if I’d let you.”

  “All I know is we were alone on the road for three weeks. When all you have is each other, it’s easy to get caught up and think you feel something that isn’t really there. I figured whatever you felt for me had an expiration date on it. Besides, your father made it very clear that he’d never approve of a relationship between us.”

  “My father?” she questioned, confused. “What does he have to do with it?”

  “He pretty much told me that you and Eldon were destined for happily ever after and that I need not interfere with that. But that’s not even the main issue. The point is that I’m with Yvette now.”

  Catt put her hands on hips. “Why? Did she make it through your precious thirty-Day Plan? Can you talk to her and share your deepest secrets with her like you can with me? Tell me, Jamal, what does Yvette have that I don’t have?”

  Jamal bit his lip, not saying anything. Then the truth dawned on her.

  “Or maybe it�
��s that I have something she doesn’t have, like an extra hundred pounds,” inferred Catt. “So the fat girl is good enough to tell your secrets to and sex up behind closed doors, but when it comes down to it, you want cute little arm-candy. It doesn’t matter if she can’t stimulate you outside of the bedroom; you gotta have the dime-piece who looks good enough to make you look good, not the one you have to explain why you’re with.”

  Jamal ran his hands over his face. “Catt, I don’t want you to think—”

  “What don’t you want me to think, Jamal? That I’m not special? That I’m not your friend?” She scooped up the flowers. “You can save it! I know I’m no supermodel, but I know I’ve got a heck of a lot going for me than that panty-droppin’ floozy you’ve decided to take up with. The fact that you couldn’t look past my imperfections to see the real me like I looked past yours to see the real you lets me know you don’t even deserve to have a decent woman like me.”

  “I can’t help what I am or what I’m not attracted to!” he protested.

  “Oh, I get it, Jamal. I really do. Do you know why? Because I’m not attracted to weak, shallow, pretentious, fake men like yourself! I’m fat, Jamal, not stupid, not undesirable, not ugly—just fat! I have feelings and contrary to what you may have heard, big girls do cry!” She thrust the flowers into his chest with tears burning in her eyes and ran out. She’d already let him see her vulnerable. It would be a cold day in hell before she let him see her cry over him.

  Catt stormed out of the building, nearly crashing into Oni.

  “Well, good morning to you too!” retorted Oni.

  Catt grit her teeth. She had to repress her emotions until she was in the safety of her car. “Sorry, I didn’t see you.”

  “I’ve been looking at some of the preliminary reports. The company execs have been very pleased with the work you and Jamal have been doing.”

  Catt barely muttered a quick, “Thank you.”

  “Don’t be so excited, Catt.” Oni peered at her with a raised eye. “Is everything all right?”

  Catt sighed. “Jamal and I just had a disagreement, that’s all.”

  “Is there some drama brewing between you two? You know we can’t afford to have two of our best chemists at odds.”