“Yes. I think so.” Daniel opened his satchel and pulled out some papers. “I do hate to do this during supper, but perhaps we should get on with this, Wakefield.”
“Course.”
Tension still thick in the air, Wakefield looked over the contract and signed it with Daniel’s pen.
“Wonderful dinner, Mrs. Briggs,” Daniel said. ”But, I best be going.
With his meal not even half eaten, Daniel stood, shook Wakefield’s hand, and departed.
And still the silence remained. Thea sat quiet, hands in her lap. It was then that Wakefield knew the truth. He’d done everything he could to be better, and still nothing was enough. Their marriage had started as a dream.
And now it was a ghost of that.
Chapter 39
warm and strong embrace
39. Thea
Chapter thirty-nine
“Wakefield,” Thea murmured.
He raised his eyebrows, waiting. Thea shook her head. What was she to say? Mr. Zimmerman had left a good minute ago, and yet she still worked to wrap her head around what had occurred.
“You sold the saloon,” she confirmed.
“Yes.”
“What does Noah think of this?”
“He’s going to keep working there. Keep living above it. Except, now he’ll be the official manager. I won’t have anything to do with Outpost anymore. I’m washing my hands clean of all that.”
Wakefield dipped his face, staring at her. Thea sensed she missed something.
“But why?” she asked.
“Why?” Wakefield shook his head. “Thea... I did this for us.”
“You talked about selling the saloon before, but now you’re doing it and building a hotel. I don’t understand, Wakefield.”
His throat rolled as he swallowed. “Thea, there’s gonna be no alcohol at this hotel. It’ll have a restaurant. A real simple one. But we won’t be serving any drink unless it comes from a well or a cow’s teat.”
Thea laughed at his choice of words, shock still shooting through her. So he had sold the saloon because of the alcohol...
Thea’s pulse sped up. “Are you telling me...?”
Wakefield picked up his chair, brought it around the table, and set it down next to hers. Taking his seat once more, he set his hand on Thea’s.
“I don’t want to make the same mistakes again,” he said. “That’s why I sold the saloon. There’s too much temptation. As long as I’m around the bottle, there’s always the chance I might be too weak one day and give in. We have a baby on the way. There’s no space in our life for mistakes. Not of that caliber.”
Thea’s eyes burned, and before she knew it, she was crying.
“You sold the saloon for us,” she said. “I still cannot believe it.”
“Why, Thea?” Wakefield’s eyes shone with emotion and intensity. “Don’t you see that you’re everything to me? I know I have more problems than one man should. I’m doing my best to deal with them. I’ve been praying every day, asking God to help me.” He swallowed. “I won’t lie to you. I’m still afraid. I fall asleep every night thinking about the worst things that could happen to you and the baby. But I’m working on it all. I am.”
Thea dabbed at the last of her tears, a smile tugging at her lips. “You did not have to do this.”
“Except, I did.” He reached forward and cupped her face. Thea closed her eyes and surrendered to the sensation. It had been so long since he’d touched her in such a tender way, so long since she’d been open to it.
“You haven’t been able to forgive me, Thea,” Wakefield said. “And I don’t blame you for that. I haven’t been able to forgive myself. But, maybe this will be a new start for us. At least I can show you how serious I am about changing.”
Thea opened her eyes. The earnestness in Wakefield’s face could not be denied. This was her husband. A man she had traveled across the country to marry without ever meeting. A man who had embraced her right away, and whom she had immediately found a solid connection with. A man who had also disappointed her. Hurt her.
But such was life. The entire situation was complicated beyond understanding. Jenny would likely say Thea had complicated it more than was necessary, and Thea could no longer deny that.
“Wakefield,” she whispered, “I only want to be close to you.”
His hand tightened on hers, and his other one lovingly trailed down her face. “I want the same. And the baby...”
“You’re trying.” Thea turned her face sideways and kissed his palm. “I know you are.”
His jaw ticked. “I am.”
Thea smiled, her heart brimming with love, pain, and everything in between. She felt she’d been shelving all her emotions from over the past year. From the death of Jeb, to leaving South Carolina, to Wakefield, and now to the baby. She’d allowed herself to feel very little along the way, but the full extent of her heart had remained untapped. She’d been too afraid of it.
“What about this hotel?” Thea asked. “What are your plans for it?”
Wakefield smiled wide. “I’m glad you asked. The plans haven’t been fully drawn up yet, but I’m thinking two floors. At least eight rooms. Plus the sitting room and the restaurant. A nice, wide porch to rock on and watch the sunset. What do you think?”
“It sounds wonderful.”
“Good,” Wakefield chuckled.
Thea giggled, a fresh wave of tears coming forth. This time, they were tears of happiness. Leaning forward, she pressed her lips against Wakefield’s.
The kiss was deep. Sweet. Perfect.
Letting go of Thea’s face, Wakefield picked her up and deposited her on his lap. She wrapped her arms around his neck, sinking into his warm and strong embrace. His hold was the barrier between her and the rest of the world, bringing her peace and love.
“I trust you, Wakefield,” Thea said.
Relief flooded his face. “You do?”
Thea nodded. “This has shown me that you mean what you said.”
He squeezed her waist. “I do, Thea. With every part of my soul.”
She buried her face in his neck and giggled happily. Time must have slipped by, but Thea knew nothing about it. In Wakefield’s arms, she was right where she needed to be, and the rest of the world was forgotten.
Chapter 40
twisting and turning roads
40. Wakefield
Chapter forty
The snow drifted down in fat flakes, and Wakefield stopped in the middle of the street to watch them fall. It wasn’t the first snowfall of the season, and it certainly wouldn’t be the last. But, he still stopped to enjoy the moment. By tomorrow, the whole mountain could be buried in several feet of snow.
Which meant they’d finished the hotel just in time.
Taking in some of the crisp, cold air, he continued up the road and to the cabin. As if sensing he was there, Thea opened the door and stepped out.
At the sight of her, warmth filled Wakefield. The mountain couldn’t touch him at all. Not with Thea around.
Thea smiled at him over her thick scarf. Underneath the bright red coat he’d bought her in Pathways, her belly bulged. Over the last few weeks, he’d thought she couldn’t possibly grow any larger, but every morning he’d woken up and found himself wrong.
Without a word, she laced her arm through his and they began walking carefully back down the mountain. The snow already collected on the ground muffled the sound of their footsteps, and an ease settled around them.
Life over the last few months hadn’t been perfect, but it had been close. Wakefield spent every day busy building the hotel and every night giving Thea as much attention as he could.
In the spaces in between home and work, he sought comfort from God. Every morning, he woke up and said thank you. He listed all the things he was grateful for, from his wonderful wife to the sun in the sky and the clothes on his back. After that, he went throughout the day continuing to say thanks and asking for God’s help.
And every n
ight, before he closed his eyes, he sent up a fervent prayer for help. He asked God to heal his wounded heart and to take away his fear. And then, as he drifted off to sleep, he allowed himself to believe his prayers were already answered.
The baby would be coming any day, and although Wakefield couldn’t be sure how he would react once the time came, he felt changed already. There was a lightness inside of him, and some mornings he was so happy he thought he might burst.
And all because he’d turned his worries over to God and started focusing on the good in life.
As they went down a sharper incline, Wakefield wrapped his arm around Thea’s waist and held her steady. She gave him a grateful look, and his heart about melted.
“Is this what you call autumn here?” she asked.
Wakefield’s laughter drifted across the snow. “Yes, Ma’am. Wait until you see February.”
Both smiling, they continued on. Wakefield kept his arm around Thea’s waist, liking the feel of it there, and she made no move to push him away.
As the days had progressed and she had grown in size, so had the love between the two of them. It seemed Wakefield couldn’t go more than a few minutes without touching Thea or telling her how much she meant to him, and she’d reacted in the same manner.
And soon they'd have a third person to share all that love with.
Wakefield’s stomach flipped at the thought, and though there was still some fear in him, now there was more excitement than anything else. Doctor Felder had promised to do his best to make it to Whiteridge once Thea went into labor, and, at the least, Esme was there and had experience birthing babies.
“There it is,” Wakefield proudly said as they approached the hotel.
“I’ve seen the outside,” Thea teased, lightly jabbing her elbow into his side.
“Well, come and see the best parts.”
Taking her hand, he led her across the wide front porch and into the front room. Throughout the building of the hotel, he’d kept her away, wanting her to only see inside once it was finished.
“Oh,” Thea gasped, pushing back her hood. “Look at that.”
She went to the shiny front desk and ran her hand over the smooth wood. Behind it, shelves to hold keys and mail for each room were built into the wall.
“Wait till you see the restaurant.” Taking her hand once more, Wakefield led her to the right, past the dining area and into the kitchen.
“Two cook stoves,” she said, going and touching one. “You’re planning on being busy.”
“Hopefully so.” Wakefield folded his arms and grinned in pleasure. Getting the hotel built in a few months had been no easy feat, but now he had the winter to look for employees and order furnishings for the rooms.
Starting his own hotel was going to be expensive, but Daniel had given him a fair price for Outpost, plus Wakefield had some savings to put into the pot. Thea had tried to contribute her own funds she’d brought from South Carolina, but Wakefield hadn’t allowed her to. That money was hers to do what she saw fit with.
As he’d expected, what she’d done was pay a piano tuner to come up from Pathways. Now every key rang crystal clear. As a result, Thea tended to play with twice as much vigor.
Interlacing their gloved fingers, Wakefield spun Thea around and pulled her to him. Her engorged belly pressed against his hips, and he placed a hand on top of it.
“Wakefield...” Thea looked down at his hand.
“Yes?”
“How are you feeling? Now? About the baby?”
He swallowed. “I’m ready for it. I mean that.”
Thea’s lashes fluttered. “I know you do,” she whispered.
“I love you, Wakefield.”
“I love you, too, Mrs. Briggs,” he answered, and pressed a kiss to her lips.
Thea pulled back, her brow furrowed.
“What is it?” Wakefield asked. His heartbeat sped up. Was something the matter?
“I think... I think it may be time.” Thea slowly nodded. “I was feeling something earlier, but now it is stronger.”
Wakefield worked to catch his breath. “Really?”
“Yes.”
He placed his hands on her shoulders and guided her to the one chair in the kitchen. “Sit down and stay here. I’m sending Noah for the doctor. I’ll be right back.”
Tearing from the hotel, Wakefield ran to the saloon and snatched Noah. Two minutes later, and the younger man was saddling up his horse, ready to ride down the mountain.
Wakefield ran back to the hotel, his hands shaking and his nerves climbing. This was it. Thea was having a baby!
Help us, Lord, he prayed. Keep Thea and the baby safe. Give us all the strength and courage we need.
In the hotel, he found her still in the chair, her hands on her belly. She was exhaling harshly, but at the sight of him she smiled.
Wakefield crouched next to her. “Do you need anything? Water?”
“I’m fine. I only want to get home. Is the doctor on his way?”
“Noah just rode out for him.”
“Good.” Thea smiled, then winced.
“Let’s get you home.” Carefully, Wakefield helped her stand. Side by side, they headed up the hill and into the cabin.
“Hot tea?” Wakefield asked. “Something to eat?”
“No, thank you.” Thea pressed her hands against her lower back and puffed out another breath.
Wakefield’s mind raced. He wanted to be of help, but wasn’t sure what to do.
“It is nice having you here,” Thea said, as if reading his mind.
Wakefield rubbed her back. “I’m not going anywhere.”
She tilted her head. “I thought you might go and stay at Noah’s until the baby is born.”
Wakefield locked eyes with her. “I’m not going anywhere. I’m going to be right in that room with you. Every step of the way.”
Thea’s lips parted. “My father didn’t do that for any of my mother’s births.”
“Can I?” Wakefield asked, taking her hand.
Thea’s eyes shone with tears. “Of course. Are you not nervous?”
He nodded. He was the most nervous he’d ever been, but that couldn’t be helped. Thea had to be twice as scared as him. It was important for him to stay strong and be her rock.
“With you by my side, I can do anything,” he told her.
Thea pressed her lips together, tears spilling down her cheeks. Cupping her face, Wakefield kissed her softly.
It was hours more before the doctor came, during which Thea’s labor progressed. First the room was too cold, and then too hot. She leaned against the wall, eyes squinted shut as Wakefield rubbed her back.
Late in the night, she finally took to bed, and Doctor Felder announced it was time. Fear like Wakefield had never known spiraled through him, but along with it was something else. A peace living within the fear.
No matter what happened, he somehow knew, everything would be all right. God had a hand in all that happened. Even when things seemed bad, life continued on. The end never really arrived.
Thea pushed, a guttural groan leaving her. Her grip tightened on Wakefield’s hand, and he held onto her with everything he had.
More pushes. More groans. Blood.
Was it too much blood? How much was the right amount?
Wakefield set his jaw hard and focused all of his attention on Thea. He held her head up, squeezed her hand, and pushed hair out of her face.
Just when it seemed she’d run out of steam and could not push even one more time, a high-pitched wail filled the cabin.
A baby was crying. That had to be a good sign, right?
Thea cried out in happiness, and Wakefield gasped. Doctor Felder was holding a baby. A real baby.
Even after all the months of waiting, it did not seem real.
“It’s a girl,” Doctor Felder announced, wiping the infant with a towel and looking her over. “And she seems to be healthy, from the looks of it.”
Gently, the doctor handed W
akefield the baby. She was so tiny, light as a feather in his arms, and her eyes and fists were closed tight.
A great love rose in Wakefield, and tears pricked his eyes. “A girl,” he whispered, laying the baby against Thea’s chest.
Her Silent Burden (Seeing Ranch series) (A Western Historical Romance Book) Page 24