Wild at Heart (Healing Harts)
Page 7
Julia sighed and leaned heavily on the railing as she climbed the steps. “I just want to sit down.” Dylan looked down at her and Chase could see the worry in his eyes for his wife’s welfare. She smiled up at him as if she could read his mind. “I’m fine. Just sore, and Emily needs to eat.”
“I ordered pizzas. They should be here in about twenty minutes. Here.” Bailey reached for the car seat carrier in Dylan’s hands. “I’ll take Emmie inside. You help Jules.”
Chase didn’t miss the appreciative glance both Dylan and Julia cast her and wondered how Bailey could go from acting like a smart-ass with him one moment to being tender with Julia the next. It nearly gave him whiplash trying to keep up with her moods. He hung back, waiting for everyone to head inside. While they settled in the living room, Justin and Jessie headed into the kitchen to gather plates and napkins for the meal, both stepping around Tango, who positioned himself at Julia’s feet like a footrest. Once Julia was comfortable on the leather couch, Bailey offered to retrieve a blanket to cover her while she nursed.
Chase knew he had to talk to Bailey, to explain why he’d pushed her away again. She wasn’t wrong; he was a coward. But it wasn’t for the reason she thought it was. He wasn’t afraid of Justin. He was afraid of losing his friendship. They’d been through far too much in the past year and a half to betray him now.
BAILEY HAD TO get away, put some space between herself and Chase. That kiss by the pool had left her legs weak, her pulse racing, and her mind swirling like a dust devil. He’d pushed her away as soon as her cousins arrived, the same terror on his face that she’d seen when Dylan interrupted their kiss in the hospital last night. Which could mean only one thing—he was embarrassed to be with her.
She’d always known he was too good for her, but she’d never suspected he’d thought so, too. At the very least, she’d thought they were friends. She headed down the hall to the bedroom Julia had converted to a nursery to get the blanket she’d promised. It had given her the perfect opportunity to flee, giving her a few moments alone to gather her thoughts and salvage a few pieces of her trampled heart. Bailey searched through the dresser, trying not to notice the beautiful layette Julia had for Emily already. Tiny socks, several with ruffles, dotted one side of the drawer while pink, yellow, and lavender filled the other. She ran her hand over the soft cotton lovingly. Babies might not be her thing, but she couldn’t help but be slightly envious at the love her cousin had found and the new family unit they had become. Julia was going to be a wonderful mother, attentive and nurturing. Present, unlike her own. She pushed away the thought and closed the drawer, bending to the next to find several thin blankets and lifting one. Holding the baby blanket to her face, she inhaled deeply.
“You okay?” She jumped at the sound of Chase’s voice but didn’t turn to look at him. She wondered how long he’d been standing in the doorway.
“I’m fine.” It was a lie, but she knew he wouldn’t challenge her. She doubted he wanted to discuss what had happened any more than she did.
“Bailey?” His voice was pained and she knew it was her fault. She’d pushed him to cross the line again, taunted him because she’d wanted him to see her as more than Justin’s kid “sister.” She’d let it get out of hand.
Slowly, she turned to face him and let out a heavy sigh. Tears burned at the back of her eyes and she wished she could confide in him, to finally confess how she’d always felt about him. “Why wouldn’t I be fine, Chase? Julia and Emily are home. The entire family wants to celebrate. Everything is perfect.”
He folded his arms, clenching his fingers into fists the way he had at the pool, and she wondered if he was mad at her.
“I don’t know. You sound angry, but you look . . . ” He shrugged, helplessly. “Upset, I guess.”
She shook her head and took a deep breath, closing her eyes so he couldn’t see the pain his rejection caused her. “Nope. Everything is exactly the way it should be.” She took a deep breath and squared her shoulders. “Just one big, happy family, right?” Before he could question her again, she brushed past him and walked back to the living room.
Julia took the blanket and covered herself in order to nurse. “Thanks, Bailey. It’ll be nice to have you around to help with Emily,” she said.
“Wait a second,” Justin said as he caught the tail end of Julia’s comment as he reentered the room with several bottles of beer hooked between the fingers of both hands. “Remember me? The guy trying to run a clinic?” He glanced at his sisters. “You said I was going to get Bailey back at the clinic once you had Emily.”
Julia smiled up at him sweetly. “No, you said. I didn’t even agree.”
“Come on, Jules. I’m dying without her there,” he complained.
“I’m there,” Alyssa pointed out.
Justin moved closer to his wife and curled his arm around her shoulders, pulling her close and pressing a kiss to her temple. “No offense, Lyssa, I love working with you but you’re just not Bailey.”
Alyssa laughed and glanced in Bailey’s direction. “No, I’m not.”
While Bailey knew it was a compliment, it was just one more reminder of how much she was going to let her family down when she left. She was going to leave Jessie with nothing more than a couple of teenagers to help her maintain the cabins, and she was leaving Justin with a woman who, as wonderful as she was, knew nothing about animals or how to run a vet clinic. And Julia didn’t have anyone to help her right now. Bailey chewed at the corner of her lip, trying to figure out a way to postpone her trip. As she looked around the room at her cousins, she saw them looking back with such love, it warmed her heart.
Julia adjusted her shirt and lifted Emily over the blanket at her shoulder, gently patting her back, and caught Bailey’s eye. “We’ll figure something out.”
Bailey felt the tears burning at her eyes again. She had to tell them, but a lump filled her throat and she couldn’t do it. Not yet. When her cell phone rang, she was relieved until she saw Tucker’s number on the screen. She motioned to Julia that she had to take the call and hurried out of the room, into the kitchen.
“Tucker, sorry, it’s just been too busy today to call.”
“You need to make time, Bailey. Shit is going down here, and JD isn’t telling us anything. Well, not me or Davis, but him and Josh are thick as thieves. I don’t like it.”
“What am I supposed to do about it? You’re the one down there.”
“And you need to be, too,” he reminded her. “How soon can you get here?”
She glanced back toward the living room, where she could hear Justin telling a story while everyone laughed along. Chase looked up and met her gaze, the heat she could read melting her will to detach herself from him. If she stayed much longer, she was going to make a fool out of herself. He’d made his feelings pretty clear.
“Three weeks, maybe a little sooner if I can. Just let me pack my things and tie up a couple loose ends up here, then I’ll head down.”
Tucker whooped loudly in her ear and she moved the phone away. “Finally.” He breathed a long sigh and she heard someone in the background call for him. “Hey, I gotta run. I think Davis is about to burn the studio down. Keep me posted on what day you’ll get here.”
She hung up the phone and reached for a cold beer in the back of the refrigerator, taking a long drink.
“Everything okay?”
She looked up to see Chase standing in the doorway of the kitchen, watching her intently. What was with him sneaking around? As much as her heart ached at the thought of leaving, she knew she would regret not leaving even more. “It will be.”
Chase paused, looking at her as if he wanted to say something, but he shrugged and moved to the refrigerator to grab a soda can. His nonchalance bolstered her confidence in her decision. It was time to start making decisions that would make her happy. This was where her future began.
Justin glanced her way as they walked back into the living room. “Do you think that will work, Bailey? For y
ou to help Julia Tuesdays and Thursdays so you can work at the clinic Monday, Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday?”
“I’m moving to LA,” she blurted. That hadn’t been the way she’d rehearsed telling them in her head. Not even close. She’d planned on telling them about the gigs she’d had over the past six months, laying out the details of their possible record deal and how they had a stack of original material in high demand.
“You’re leaving?” Jessie asked, but her question was nearly drowned out by Justin’s booming voice.
“What the hell are you talking about?” Justin yelled at the same time, waking his stepson sleeping in Alyssa’s arms. “When?”
“Three weeks.” Chaos immediately erupted in the small room. Justin began pacing the floor, running a hand through his hair as Alyssa tried to convince him to sit back down. Jessie started pointing out items that would need to be done before Bailey left, and both babies began crying, Sam far louder than Emily, as Julia tried to calm them both. Only Chase remained quiet in the corner of the room.
“Can’t you wait a little longer? At least give us some time to find someone, or several someones, to replace you?” Jessie asked.
“This is going to make everything a lot harder on us,” Justin muttered, aiming the comment at Jessie as if Bailey couldn’t hear him.
“Justin, don’t you think it’s time for me to live my own life, to do what I want to do?” Bailey finished off the beer and set the empty bottle aside, crossing her arms over her chest. “The band got a record deal, and we’re cutting an album.”
“The band? I thought you gave that up a while ago.”
“No, I just didn’t want to argue with you about it.” Justin’s skepticism was nearly tangible.
“Seriously, Bailey? With all the things you could do in life, that’s what you’re choosing to focus on?” He leaned against the couch, near Alyssa.
“I can sing, Justin, and I’m good at it. Damn good. It’s what I want to do, and we have a label willing to give us a shot.”
“Unbelievable.” Justin shook his head in disbelief, his jaw jutting out, and pushed himself away from the arm of the couch. He reached for a beer on the coffee table and twisted the cap off. “After all the times we’ve bailed you out, and everything we’ve given you, you’re going to just run away like your mother.”
Alyssa slid a hand to Justin’s arm in an attempt to stop his tirade. The room fell silent as every eye turned to Bailey, waiting for her reaction to Justin’s comment. The tension in the room was so thick, Bailey felt like she was choking on it.
Justin’s words picked at the wound that constantly festered beneath the surface, the fear that she was unlovable, that she was never quite enough—not for her mother and, now, not for her cousins, in spite of all she’d done for them and how she’d put her own life on hold for them. Bailey’s fists balled at her sides. Fury filled her, white hot, scalding her from the inside, and it took every bit of self-control she could muster to keep from punching Justin.
“Don’t ever talk about her again. You have no idea . . . ”
“Don’t I?” Justin snorted as he stood, stalking toward her. “I remember your mother, Bailey. Probably better than you do. You were just a kid when she left. You don’t remember how she used to talk about leaving constantly, how much she hated it here. She couldn’t shut up about her ‘big dreams.’ And when she decided to just go, my parents were the ones who got to raise you while your dad worked almost eighty hours a week to put food on your table.”
Tears blurred Bailey’s vision, but she wasn’t going to cower. She pushed her hands against his chest, forcing him back a step. She moved forward, fierce determination making her spine rigid. With anyone else, it might have been comical—a hulking beast of a man looking at a woman barely five and a half feet tall and less than half his weight. Bailey would have put money on herself in this fight. He’d crossed the line, and the apprehension in his face told her he knew it.
“If your parents were still here, I’d be the first in line to thank them profusely for all they did for me.” She stabbed a finger into the solid wall of his chest. “You, on the other hand, are acting like a son of a bitch. I didn’t realize you were doing me such a huge favor by allowing me to work for you. You know, the way I help you out at the clinic, day and night, nearly seven days a week.”
Bailey turned her head to roughly swipe away a tear that dared to break free and glide over her cheek.
Justin cleared his throat and softened his voice. “Bailey, can’t you see how—”
“Don’t say another word, Justin. I thought—I hoped—that you’d be supportive, that you’d recognize how much this meant to me. I guess I gave you far too much credit. You’re still the same arrogant, self-righteous ass you were before Alyssa arrived.” She turned to Alyssa. “Just because you dress up a pig and paint him pretty, doesn’t make him any less a pig. But you get an A for effort.”
Bailey stormed out of the kitchen, leaving Justin to stare after her, gape-mouthed, and, for the first time, at a loss for words.
AS SOON AS Bailey was out of earshot, Alyssa rounded on her husband. “What were you thinking?”
Chase was surprised by the vehemence in her voice, and Justin opened his mouth again to answer but she didn’t give him the opportunity. “No, Bailey’s right. I get that you’re upset and don’t want her to go, but don’t you realize when you act like this, you just chase her away? I thought you learned your lesson the last time she quit on you. Ugh!” Alyssa threw her free hand into the air and stormed from the room with their son, trying to soothe him back to sleep.
“She’s acting like an immature teenager,” he argued. “A band?”
Julia shook her head. “How could you compare her to Aunt Becca?”
“That was a dick move, Justin.” Jessie crossed her arms and glared at him. “I get why you did it. I don’t think this plan of hers is a good idea either, but there were far better ways to go about it than insulting her and pissing her off.”
“Yeah, because subtlety is your strong suit,” Justin shot back, grabbing his beer as he slid onto the couch, looking like a pouty child. “I didn’t mean to . . . ”
Bailey had barely looked in Chase’s direction as she hurried past him and headed out the back door. He wanted to follow her but first he had a few things to get off his chest.
“Justin, I’ve watched you act like Bailey’s father ever since her mother abandoned her. She might be like a kid sister to you but, in case you haven’t noticed, Bailey grew up when you weren’t looking. She wasn’t looking for your permission to leave; she wanted your support. You’re upset because she’s doing something you have no control over. But that doesn’t give you the right to kick her below the belt, right where you knew it would have the most impact, in hopes it would be a wake-up call.” He pushed himself away from the wall, prepared to find Bailey and take any foul temper she might want to dish his way. If she needed someone to lash out at, he owed her that, and if she just wanted someone to talk to, it might as well be him. “Now she’s even more determined to go.”
“This is family business, Chase.”
Chase stopped and spun, taking a step closer to Justin, prepared to take him on if needed.
“Justin!” Julia scolded. Justin scowled at him.
“So, now I’m not family? Isn’t it funny how I’m family when you want to ask for favors?” Chase threw his hands up. “You know what? This isn’t about you. This is about Bailey. She’s been supportive of every one of you,” Chase said. “Get your shit together and do the same for her.”
Chase’s only satisfaction was knowing that as he headed out the back door, he left Justin speechless for the second time in less than ten minutes.
Chapter Seven
JUST LIKE YOUR mother.
Bailey had spent so much time trying not to think about her mother that it was difficult to stop fighting the memories of the woman who had made growing up in this small town hell for her. She wished that some of
her memories would fade, but they were clear. Like a bad movie that played on repeat. She hadn’t cared that the dude ranch had been in the family for three generations; she wanted more, and this town wouldn’t provide it. The late nights when her father would pick up her mother from another bar, or jail. The rumored affairs. The reputation that followed her into her teen years and the decisions she’d made, right or wrong.
Bailey rubbed a hand over her forehead, trying to unsee that last night, the way her father had broken down and begged her mother to stay. It hadn’t worked. In the morning, she’d been gone. No more tearful arguments, and no good-bye. Bailey just woke to find her mother and her things gone.
While she might not want to admit any similarities between her and her mother, Justin wasn’t completely misguided. She had big dreams of leaving town, finding a place where she could make a name for herself and, as much as it pained her, she was abandoning her family to do it.
But she wasn’t running away in the dead of night without a word. She’d been open with her family, even if she hadn’t given them a lot of notice. And she wasn’t turning her back on everyone she loved. She would keep in touch and visit when she was able to. Her mother had sought fame but, if she were completely honest, Bailey sought freedom. She cared far less about the record deal than what it represented—an opportunity to find herself, to be the woman she wanted to be away from this fishbowl she currently lived in, with people watching and judging her every move. It would give her a chance to leave the overwhelming pressure to be someone she wasn’t—another one of the perfect Hart kids. It was too much, and she felt herself crumbling under the weight of it, dying inside each time she heard people whispering about Wild Hart. She wasn’t innocent, but she wasn’t as bad as people made her out to be.
A sharp, high-pitched bark caught Bailey’s attention and she spun to see Chase walking toward her, Gracie trotting at his side. She couldn’t help but roll her teary eyes.
Great.
Bailey didn’t have the emotional strength to fight her attraction to him after her confrontation with Justin. “What do you want, Chase? Are you here to tell me how stupid I am, too?” She swiped at the cursed tears sliding down her cheeks as she sat on the stoop of the small fenced yard Julia used for training the dogs on obstacles. She brought her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. The last thing she wanted right now was to feel like she had to be on the defensive again.