by Carol Lynne
Nate cleared his throat. “Maybe the town has become disillusioned. Brian Doles was very respected in Cattle Valley. People would have done anything for him, but he let them down. The person who in their minds was good and true turned out to be a monster.”
“It’s a lot to think about,” Casey said, rubbing his sore eyes. “Would you mind taking me back to the church?”
“If you’ll promise to eat some lunch? You need to take better care of yourself.” Nate walked beside Casey toward the door.
“I need to fix the inside, before I can worry about the outside,” Casey mumbled. He felt more lost than he had before, but Rio was right, this really had nothing to do with his love for Hal.
After a couple of hours and no Casey, Hal started to worry. Casey knew they needed to get this sheetrock up, and it wasn’t something Hal could do on his own. He looked out the window to see if his car was still in his drive. Yep, which meant he was either sulking at home or still with Nate. His jaw tightened at the thought of Casey with the good-looking and charming Nate. Hal knew Casey had been hurting lately. It was evident every time he caught Casey’s gaze as they worked. He wished he could tell Casey he was hurting just as much, but it was better this way. A clean break would be easier on both of them.
Unclipping his phone, he called Casey at home. After four rings, the answering machine clicked on, and Hal hung up. Rubbing the phone against his temple, Hal tried to figure out if he should call The Gym. Would it seem intrusive?
He’d thought of nothing else besides Casey since Thanksgiving. Wishing he could get over his anger of thirty years but knowing it had become so much a part of him, he was lost to know how to let it go.
A quick shake to his head and Hal was calling information. After getting the number, he held his breath and called Nate.
“The Gym,” a deep voice answered. It must be Rio, Hal thought.
“Hi, it’s Hal. I was hoping to talk to Casey. We’ve got a lot of wallboard left to install, and I wondered when he’d be back?”
“Um, Nate dropped Casey off at the church over an hour ago.”
“Oh, I haven’t seen him,” Hal said.
“I know he wasn’t feeling well, maybe he’s gone on to bed for the day.”
“Yeah, maybe. Okay, well thanks.” Hal hung up, and called Casey’s phone again. When he still didn’t get an answer, he started to really worry and decided to check out the church. As he walked toward the connecting door, Hal hoped he wouldn’t burst into flames as soon as he entered the sanctuary.
Taking a deep breath, Hal walked into the church. “Casey?” Hal called in a respectful tone. He looked around the big open space, finding nothing. He turned, ready to make a hasty retreat, when he heard something coming from the front of the church. It had to be Casey, but he couldn’t figure out what that sound was. As he stepped into the vestibule, he heard it again. Looking over, Hal determined it was coming from the men’s restroom.
“Casey?” Hal called, opening the door. He spotted movement in one of the stalls. “You sick?” After another retch, his question was answered. Wetting a paper towel, Hal opened the stall door just as Casey stood and flushed the toilet.
“I’m okay,” Casey turned, and Hal almost lost his lunch.
“The hell you are.” Hal brought the wet towel to Casey’s face and wiped away smeared blood. “We need to get you to the clinic,” he said, showing Casey the towel.
“No,” Casey said, shaking his head. “I just need to get to bed.”
Hal felt his face pale. No he wouldn’t go through this again. Without a word he reached out and picked up Casey. Cradling the smaller man in his arms, he walked toward the door.
When Casey saw them heading for Hal’s truck he tried getting away. “Stop, just put me in bed, and I’ll be fine.”
“I know you’re not as stupid as that. God won’t heal this problem.” As soon as he’d said it, Hal wished he could take it back.
“I don’t like hospitals.” Casey continued to squirm.
It took all Hal’s strength to keep Casey off the ground. “It’s a clinic. Indulge me.”
Casey started coughing and Hal looked down. Casey’s fist and the front of Hal’s shirt were splattered with drops of blood. He just looked at Casey and unlocked the truck door. Getting him buckled in, Hal ran around and jumped in before Casey could escape.
Starting the truck, Hal looked over. Casey had his hand on the door handle getting ready to jump out. “No!” Hal screamed. “I won’t lose someone else I love because they didn’t get the help they need.” He tried to reach across Casey to shut the door, just as the smaller man stuck his head out and threw up again. Jumping out, Hal ran around to give him some support.
Pulling his bandana out of his pocket, he tried to hold Casey up with one arm. Hal noticed a lot of stomach acid, but only a small amount of blood. Once Casey stopped, Hal laid him back in the seat. “Sit tight.”
Jumping in, he spun out of the parking lot toward the clinic on Main Street
. It wasn’t until after they’d taken Casey back to the exam room that Hal had a chance to breathe and think. Shit, had he really told Casey he loved him? Maybe his little man was so out of it he wouldn’t remember.
One thing he knew, he couldn’t just sit there thinking. He picked up the phone and called his best friend.
“Gill’s,” the deep voice answered.
“You got time to baby-sit a friend?”
Chapter Five
“Thanks, Nate,” Hal said and disconnected the call, and walked back in to the waiting room.
“What’d he say?” Gill asked.
Hal took a deep breath and looked around the room. Cattle Valley Medical Clinic wasn’t really set up as a hospital, but they had a small emergency department with a doctor on call. Dr. Isaac Singer was luckily the physician on call when he’d brought Casey in, and Isaac had come right over from his office next door.
While Hal had sat in the waiting room, Casey was in the procedure room having an endoscopy. Isaac had wanted to transfer Casey to a bigger hospital, but Casey had gotten upset, claiming he just wanted to go home.
After consulting with a physician in Sheridan, Isaac had agreed to do the procedure in the emergency department. If they could get the bleeding stopped, Casey could be released as early as the next day, or it could be up to three days. Hal couldn’t imagine lying in an emergency room bed for up to three days. Casey would have been much more comfortable in a real hospital, but for some reason, he refused to go.
“Did you hear me?” Gill asked, bringing Hal out of his thoughts.
He turned toward his friend, and sighed. “Nate said he threw up earlier, when he was at The Gym.” Hal ran his fingers through his hair. “It seems he’s suffering because of me, the town, and his own conscience.”
“I understand the you part, but what’s this about the town?”
“It seems Cattle Valley hasn’t been very receptive to their newest resident. A holdover from Brian Doles, I gather. Nate said Casey’s been questioning his ability to lead the congregation.” Hal didn’t tell Gill that Casey was thinking about giving up the church. Hal still couldn’t believe it. No one had ever loved him that much. Hell, he had a lot of thinking to do. But first, he needed to set Casey’s congregation straight. No way would he let the people of this town paint Casey with the same brush used on Reverend Doles. Hal narrowed his eyes. “Do you know who’s on the church board?”
“Some,” Gill replied. “I know Mayor Madison, Shep Black, and Asa Montgomery are on it. I think maybe Pam Gleason, too.”
“I’m going to step outside and start making phone calls. Come out and get me the second Isaac comes out.” At Gill’s nod, Hal walked out onto the sidewalk. Flipping open his phone he got to work.
By the time he was let in to see Casey, it was going on eight o’clock. Hal stood at the end of the narrow bed and gazed at the sleeping man. Casey looked so fragile. Dr. Singer thought he’d closed the perforation to his duodenum, but they pla
nned to keep a close eye on Casey for another forty-eight hours.
When he’d asked Isaac what had caused the bleeding in the first place, he was told gastric acid build-up, caused by stress and too many aspirins. Knowing he was one of the reasons for the stress made Hal feel like shit. The whole situation between the two of them was frustrating. Hal knew his feelings were more than any he’d had before. They certainly weren’t the kind you had for a simple one-night fuck.
Pulling up a short stool, Hal sat next to the bed. He’d asked Quade Madison to set up an emergency meeting for nine o’clock. Hal just hoped Casey woke up by then. He’d like to look into those dark brown eyes just once before leaving for the night.
Hal had sent Gill on home after they’d talked to Isaac. Now it was just him. He knew he should call Casey’s folks, but he knew nothing about them. He didn’t even know for sure where they lived. Hopefully, Casey would wake up and tell him what to do. Hal wasn’t good with sick people. After his mom had died, he’d run the other way as soon as someone mentioned not feeling well. He’d never thought he’d be sitting beside the bed of a sick man. Especially one he’d come to love. And there was no longer any doubt that he loved Casey. Watching him throw-up had almost brought him to his knees. All Hal could think about was Casey dying without knowing how he felt.
The thin legs under the blanket started to move restlessly, and Hal sat up, watching Casey’s face. Before long, Casey’s long eyelashes began to flutter. “Casey?” Hal whispered.
Casey’s eyes started to open before shutting again. “Too bright,” he rasped.
Hal jumped up and turned the overhead light off, leaving the light in the corner on. “How’s that?” he asked, taking his seat again.
Casey tried again and managed to get his eyes open about half-way. “Better.” He turned his head toward Hal. “Thirsty.”
Reaching for the plastic cup on the table, Hal shrugged. “They won’t let you drink anything until they’re sure you won’t throw it up, but they gave me this little sponge thing to wet your mouth down.”
At Casey’s nod, Hal dipped the sponge into the cup of water. “Open for me,” Hal instructed.
Casey complied, and Hal ran the sponge around the inside of Casey’s mouth. “Is that enough for now?”
Nodding, Casey’s eyes drifted closed before opening again. “Tired.”
“I imagine you are. Dr. Singer thinks he got the bleeding stopped, but they’ll need to keep you here for another two days or so.”
Casey shook his head. “I wanna go home.”
“Sorry.” Hal reached out and took Casey’s hand. “I’ll wait and let you talk to the doctor, but it sounds like they want someone to keep a pretty close eye on you for the next bit. I thought maybe you’d come to my house and take a little vacation from some of the stress you’ve been dealing with.”
Casey looked at him for several moments. “Are you trying to get me away from the stress or the church?”
“The stress is killing you,” Hal said.
Despite being tired, Casey started to get himself worked up. “There’s a ton of work to be done on the building, and my Christmas sermon, and the pageant, and planning the party…”
“Enough.” Hal stood and leaned over Casey. “None of those things are as important to me as you and your health.” He closed the distance and placed a soft kiss on Casey’s lips.
A look of surprise crossed Casey’s face. “Why’d you do that?” he asked.
“Because I’m falling in love with you, and my beef is with God, not you.” Hal brushed Casey’s bottom lip with his thumb. “I’m not sure how it will work out, but I’d like to give it a try.”
Tears pooled in Casey’s eyes. As he tried to blink them away, a few escaped and ran down the side of his face. Capturing them with his lips, Hal tried to soothe the emotional man. “Is that a yes? Or is that a too-late-buddy?”
Casey nodded. “That’s a yes, but I need you to do something for me.”
“Anything,” Hal said, giving Casey a grin.
“I’m gonna need you to kiss me again, and often.” Casey smiled back.
“My pleasure,” Hal said, seconds before he captured Casey’s lips again. They started off slow, but soon Casey’s tongue was tangling with his own. How had he lived without this? Holding Casey by the back of the neck, Hal took the kiss even deeper, bathing Casey’s lips and mouth with his tongue.
A clearing throat broke them apart. Hal didn’t release his hold on Casey but turned his head toward the doorway. Dr. Singer stood smiling at them, clipboard in hand.
“Might I have a word with my patient?”
Turning back to Casey, Hal placed one more kiss on his nose. “I’ll be outside. I want to see you again before they run me out of here for the night.” He stood, and squeezed Casey’s small hand before walking into the hall. He didn’t miss the wide smile Isaac gave him as he passed.
Well, folks would just have to get used to it. Standing in the waiting room, Hal had never felt happier. His primary goal now was to get Casey healthy and stress-free, and if that meant knocking a few heads together, he was up to the task.
Looking at his watch, he knew he only had about ten minutes before he’d have to leave for his meeting at the church. Pacing back and forth, Hal was just about to leave when Isaac finally came out of the little exam room they had Casey tucked in. “He doing okay?” Hal asked.
“Seems to be. Of course he’s all goofy-eyed now with love, so it’s a little harder to assess him.” Isaac grinned. “I never in a million years would’ve imagined you two together.”
“Yeah, well I think neither did we, which is part of the reason he’s in that bed right now. I’m fixing to take care of the other part.”
“Mind if I ask?” Isaac inquired.
Hal shook his head. “This town and Casey’s congregation need an attitude adjustment.”
Isaac seemed to know just what Hal was talking about. “You have to give people a break. The whole Reverend Doles thing was a shock to them.”
“Don’t care. That man in there has done nothing but good for them, and yet they refuse to see it. Well, if I have to hold their heads to make them look closer, they’ll see it.”
Isaac chuckled. “Something gives me the feeling if anyone can do it, you can. Good luck to you.” Isaac shook Hal’s hand. “The emergency room nurse will be on duty overnight. She’ll call if I’m needed.”
“Can I leave her my number, too?”
“Sure,” Isaac said, walking off.
Pushing open the door, Hal knew he had less than a minute before he had to speed across town. “Hey,” he said, going to Casey’s side.
“Hey, yourself,” Casey grinned.
“They’re kicking me out, but I’ll be back in the morning around nine to check on you.” He bent down and gave Casey a kiss, sweeping his tongue into the warm depths for just a second. Hal drew back and looked into Casey’s eyes. “I love you,” he whispered.
“And I love you,” Casey answered.
After Hal left, Casey couldn’t stop smiling. He knew he should be worried about the church and what would happen if he didn’t get out in time for Sunday services, but right then, he didn’t care. All that mattered was this feeling of utter peace within his heart. Hal hadn’t asked him to give up his faith. Instead, he’d said they’d work it out. Casey didn’t really know what that meant either, but for this feeling, he was willing to take the risk.
He thought about calling his parents but decided against it. They tended to hover anyway, and if they found out he had a peptic ulcer, they’d be on the first plane out of Kansas City. They hadn’t always been that way, but since he’d gotten pneumococcal meningitis his first year of college, they tended to worry. Now though, Casey smiled, he had other things to think about besides his folks.
As much as he’d like to take Hal up on his offer of recuperating at his house, Casey knew it would be easier for both of them, if they were next door to the church. What if it made Hal feel weird to m
ake love to him that close to a church? He started to worry on it until he felt a slight discomfort in his stomach. Okay, enough thinking. He’d let Hal make the decision. Wow, how easy it was to trust Hal shocked him.
The nurse came in a few minutes later with a sedative. “Dr. Singer wants you to get plenty of rest while you’re here.”
“Yes, ma’am.” Casey swallowed the pill and handed her the empty paper cup. Before long his eyes were drooping. Hopefully his sleep would be peaceful. Dropping off, Casey still had a smile on his face.
Chapter Six
At six the next morning, Hal was busy at work with help from Gill. “I really appreciate this, buddy.” Hal hammered another nail into the sheetrock. Even though Gill was a hell of a lot stronger than Casey, Hal missed his regular helper.
“No problem,” Gill answered, his voice deep and sleepy. “I don’t open the garage for another hour.”
“Hopefully I’ll get another volunteer by the time you have to go.” Hal thought about his meeting the previous night. He still wasn’t sure what kind of impression he’d made, but he knew he’d gotten their attention. A few tried to make excuses, but Hal would listen to none of it. The bottom line was if they wanted their church to succeed, they’d need to come to terms with their feelings regarding Brian Doles.
Nate stood right beside him even though he wasn’t on the board. Hal had felt relieved he wasn’t the only one there to attest to Casey’s character.
“Hey, you with me?” Gill asked.
Hal shook his head and hammered in the next nail. “Sorry. I was thinking about my meeting.”
“They’ll come around. I don’t know Casey much, but anyone who has you defending them so vehemently has to be a good egg.”
“Thanks. Gill? I think, no, I know, I’m in love. For the first time in my life I’m in love and I’m uneasy about it. What if our lives are just too different to make it work?”
After the last nail was in, Gill pulled Hal off the chair and gave him a hug. “I’m glad you finally found someone, but I don’t know how to reassure you. I don’t know what happened to make you turn away from God, but I think you’ll need to decide which means more, the past or the future. Maybe being with Casey will help you heal.”