by Lelly Hughes
As soon as I step on the platform, I pull my hand out gently and set her down, only for her to go right for my jeans, working the buckle open and then the button and zipper. Zara pushes my jeans open and grips my dick, pumping me softly. My eyes are rolling back in my head, throwing me a bit off balance. I wobble, only to right myself by grabbing ahold of the overhead beam.
“Have you ever fucked up here?” she asks, bringing out a side of her that she saves for the bedroom. Zara is the most prim and proper woman I have ever had the pleasure of knowing until the proverbial door is closed, then all bets are off with what may come out of her mouth.
“No, but I’m about to.” Reluctantly, I step out of her grip and stagger over to a few of hay bales and rearrange them for what I think will be comfortable for Zara.
“Come here.” I beckon her with my finger. As she draws close, I reach out and pull the knot that is holding her shirt together, loosening it so I can take off her shirt. Her barely there bra makes my mouth water, and as much as I want to make love to her right now, I can’t. Stormy isn’t far from the barn with her trainer and Willow could come back from my parents’ at any time.
“Put your hands on the hay bale.” My head nods toward the stack I created, and Zara obliges. With her back facing me, she shimmies out of her shorts and looks at me over her shoulder. The sight of this woman that I love, dressed as a cowgirl, showing me her ass and knowing that her pussy is glistening for me, has my cock leaking.
Bending over and rifling through my pocket to pull out my wallet, I realize that I don’t have it, which means I don’t have a condom. Zara notices the instant look of contempt.
“What’s wrong?”
I shake my head. “No condom. I left my wallet on the dresser.”
Zara pushes off the hay bale and shuffles over to me. Her hand caresses my face, her lace clad breasts push against my skin, and my dick jumps to attention at the fact that she’s so near. “I was tested after I found out about Van. My results came back that I’m clean.” She closes her eyes, and I get the feeling that she’s not only berating herself for bringing him up at a time like this but also thankful that he at least saved her the agony of a disease. “What I’m saying is that I’m clean, and I’m on the pill. If you want…”
Hell yes, I want, but I can’t exactly say that out loud.
“If you’re sure, Zara.”
“I am. I want this between us.” She leaves me standing there and returns to her previous position, again throwing me a look over her shoulder. There is no second-guessing, no apprehension on my part. I saddle up behind her and rub the head of my cock between her folds until she bends down even further, giving me an optimum angle.
I sink into her without abandon, moaning at the feel of her walls welcoming me. My hands rest on her hips, and I slowly move in and out until Zara slams herself into me.
“Harder,” she demands, biting her lower lip.
She could ask me anything right now, and I’d give it to her. My fingers dig into her skin as I use her hips as leverage to pound into her. Her sweet moans and the sound of our skin slapping together fill the barn. I lean forward and pull the cup of her bra down and grasp her nipple, tweaking it between my fingertips. Zara cries out more and reaches between her legs to play with her swollen bud.
The crunching of gravel catches our attention. Zara’s head shoots up, and she looks at me. “Hurry up,” she says. I do as she says and replace her hand with mine, massaging the hell out of her clit to make her come because I know that when she does, I won’t be far behind.
The slamming of not one, but two car doors has me thrusting faster than I ever have before. Zara is watching me, with a mixture of pleasure and fear etched across her face. When she nods, I know she’s about to peak, and I pray that once she starts, I’ll be right behind her. The thought of walking around with a raging hard-on doesn’t seem pleasurable to me right now.
Zara bits her lower lip to keep from crying out as her orgasm takes over her body. Her hand covers her mouth to muffle her sounds. I pound harder and relish in the feeling that I am doing this to her, for her, and that’s enough to push me over the brink.
We stay this way, breathing heavily, rocking in and out of each other until I pull out and quickly bring my jeans up. Zara does the same, and before we know it, we’re laughing our asses off.
“That was close,” she says.
“It was thrilling, but I need to finish the job.”
“I’ll be waiting.”
Zara heads down the stairs before me, and I breathe a sigh of relief when she yells Willow’s name. We need to be more careful when the girls are around. We could’ve been easily caught, and I don’t know how I would explain the situation to them.
I stay in the loft, moving hay around until I’ve created a wall facing the interior of the barn. I fully intend to bring Zara up here again but want to make sure that we are barricaded from prying eyes.
When I finally walk into the house, it’s noisy, and I find that I love it. I have missed the constant chatter; the feel the house has when people are in it and the love that comes with having a family.
I find Zara and the girls in the kitchen, baking. I kiss Willow and Stormy on the tops of their heads and can’t help myself when it comes to Zara. I kiss her on the lips, much to the snickering and dare I say, delight, of my children.
“Daddy’s kissing Zara,” Willow mocks.
“Yes, he is,” I can’t help but say.
“Does this mean you’re like an official couple?” Stormy asks.
I look at Zara for confirmation. “Yes, we are. Are you girls okay with that?”
Stormy shrugs, but nods while Willow yells out a resounding yes!
“Perfect. Let me go fire up the grill.” I take the tray of meat that I put together this morning out of the refrigerator and head back out to the deck. The window is open, and I can hear my girls, all three of them talking.
Zara is inserting herself into their lives, asking about Stormy’s training and what Willow did with her Memaw. I crack a smile when Zara uses the southern term for grandma, loving that she’s trying to acclimate.
When Stormy asks Zara about continuing her dance studies, telling her that she’s afraid to bring it up to me, I feel about two feet tall. I never meant for Stormy to only focus on barrel racing, but knew she has a passion for that as well.
“I can make some calls for you tomorrow if that’d be okay,” Zara suggests.
“I’d like that. I think I can do both,” Stormy says.
“You can do anything you want,” I tell her as I stand in the doorway. “You can do both or either one.” I shrug. “Or maybe somethin' different. The sky’s the limit, Stormy. I will support whatever.”
It’s at that moment that I know I’ve finally broken through with Stormy. She comes up to me and wraps her arms around me.
“I love you, Daddy,” she whispers in my ear.
She will never know how much I love her. It can never be told in songs, words, or even material things. The day she realizes the depth of my love will be the day that she becomes a mother and can experience the instant connection she has with her own child.
Before I can tell her that I love her, Willow wraps her arms around both of us, joining in the lovefest.
“Come on, Zara,” Stormy says, inviting her into our unit.
Right there, in my kitchen I have two of the most important women in my life, welcoming the one I’m in love with into our family.
Chapter 31
Zara
To say the past few months have been a whirlwind would be a gross understatement. I went from being happily married, to finding out my husband was cheating on me, to meeting the most amazing man and his children, to falling in love with them.
I’ve been in love with Levi for some time now, but falling in maternal love with his daughters has taken me to a whole other level. It’s because of the girls I haven’t gone back to Los Angeles as planned. I was going to stay a month in Nas
hville and then head home, back to my life, my music and whatever else waited for me.
Levi and I even sat down and discussed how our relationship would work long distance. No more than two weeks apart, and with the girls out of school, they would travel to me. We even talked about taking vacations together. On paper, it’s a fail-safe way minus the part where we wouldn’t be together. That part didn’t sit well with me, and I have yet to leave Nashville.
I’m comfortable here. I love sitting on the deck and listening to the birds sing, watching Stormy race, reading with Willow, and of course watching Levi do his chores. Who would’ve thought that chores would be so sexy? Not me. I can’t recall the last time I saw Van lift a finger. Everything in our lives was contracted out. With Levi, he likes to get his hands dirty and even though he has a crew that works for him daily, he’s still outside busting his ass.
And while he’s working, I’m inside making lunch for everyone or preparing dinner. I have found that I love to cook and bake, and the girls love it too. We’ve made it a game of who can come up with the craziest recipe because we know that Levi will try anything, and he loves it all, even when it’s the grossest thing ever.
But we laugh, all of us. It’s the best sound in the world. And from what I can tell, the girls are happy. Stormy is dancing and barrel racing, which makes her father very happy. Willow has decided that she’ll start dance in the fall, but also wants to play sports. Both girls love to shop, like crazy mall shopping once every other day.
That is where we are now because Willow has to have the new something or other that just came out, and of course, I jumped at the opportunity to bring her because we get to bond more. The first time we ventured to the mall, it was crazy. Fans were immediately upon me, scaring Stormy and Willow. That was the last time we went without a bodyguard. There’s nothing like a giant three hundred plus man walking behind you, glaring at anyone that might look in your direction. Big Joe, as he likes to be called, drew the line at carrying our bags though. We tried.
“What do you think of this?” Stormy comes out, dressed similarly to the way I dress. I like what she’s wearing, but not sure her father would approve, but then again, he loves me so he might not care.
“I like it, but do you? It’s one thing to dress like that every day, but to change back and forth might give you whiplash.”
She shrugs while looking in the mirror. Her head is slanted with her toes turned inward. She looks every bit a rocker chick with the combat boots she’s wearing that are similar to mine, a short skirt and a shirt that has already been cut. I think she looks cute. Adorable even.
“Let me take your picture.”
Stormy turns around and poses while I snap the photo and send it off to her dad. She disappears into the dressing room, telling me she has another outfit to try on.
As soon as I see that Levi has read the message, I text him: Do you like it?
I don’t mean to hound him, but if Stormy asks if she can get it, I need to be able to tell her yes or no. Almost instantly, Levi’s face appears on my screen.
“Hello.”
“Hey, babe,” he says, breathlessly. The way he sounds, his voice, it makes me melt. “Stormy looks cute in that outfit.”
“I thought so, too.”
“She can get it if she wants. I think it’d be pretty messed up for me to tell her that she can’t dress like my girlfriend.”
Once again, I’m smiling like a fool. I love the label, even more, when I see it plastered all over the web. Those are some of my favorite headlines. The ones I don’t appreciate are the ones that talk about Van, me cheating, Levi and I being engaged or when they circle my belly and announce that I’m pregnant and don’t know who the baby daddy is. It’s that shit that really sets me off and makes me despise the media.
“I’ll be sure to tell her if she asks.”
“I trust your judgment, Zara.”
“I’m just afraid the girls might take advantage.”
“They won’t,” he tells me. “They love you.”
And I love you, but neither of us has had the courage to say those words to each other.
“I love them, too.”
“What time will you be home?”
Home. Aside from Levi saying love, home is my next favorite word. There is another four-letter word that I like, but I like saving that for special occasions.
“I think in an hour or so. The girls are trying on clothes, and we talked about getting a treat someplace.”
“I’ll be waiting.”
We hang up in time for Willow to come out of the dressing room dressed in an extravagant ball gown.
“Wow, Willow. Are you going to some ball that your father isn’t aware of?”
She giggles and twirls in front of the mirror. “Nope. I thought I could wear this to your wedding.”
“My wedding?” I try to laugh off what she says.
“Yeah, I saw that you and daddy were gettin’ married.”
“Oh… you don’t think I’d pick out a dress for you if that was the case?”
Willow spins again, this time knocking into her sister. Stormy glares at her and Willow sticks her tongue out in retaliation.
“I told you that daddy and Zara aren’t gettin’ married, Willow. You can’t believe everything you read on the web.”
Willow is far too young to be reading anything about her father on the web, and honestly, Stormy shouldn’t be either. As much as I want to say something about their reading habits, I don’t. I know for a fact that Levi has talked to them in the past about how the media will misrepresent things so they can make money.
“Well she’s having a baby, and that means they’re getting’ married,” Willow says with her hands on her hips.
My mouth drops at her statement, and I slowly look around to see if anyone could hear her. Sure enough, there’s a group of women, some young, typing away on their phones. As soon as I stand, Big Joe is right behind me.
“Girls, I think it’s time to go.” I usher them back into the dressing room and ask them to change quickly. I turn to find Big Joe blocking the doorway so no one can get in right now.
“I really wanted to buy some clothes,” Stormy says from behind her door.
“I know. We’ll come back. Right now I just really want to get out of here, okay?”
“Okay,” Stormy says. I hate feeling like I’m disappointing her and Willow, but right now I’m just not comfortable being out in the open.
As soon as they’re changed, Big Joe clears the doorway so we can leave. He follows closely behind and isn’t afraid to push people who are trying to get our picture, out of the way. The girls walk with their heads down, clearly used to being in the limelight. I feel bad for them, sorry even. They didn’t ask to be born into this life, but it’s the one they lead with their father, and now me. Maybe bringing them to the mall wasn’t such a great idea.
We pile into the SUV that Levi has rented, with Big Joe behind the wheel. Thankfully the windows are tinted, but the damage is done. Our photos are up on every social media platform with the headline: Zara Phillips confirms pregnancy. Part of me wishes it were true, while the other part is completely disgusted that this conversation even took place among the girls.
I’m tempted to remind Willow that personal family business needs to stay between the walls of our home and because of her loud mouth people think it’s true that I’m pregnant. I’m not. Nor do I intend to be, at least while my divorce is still proceeding. That would be a complication that I don’t need.
Half way to Levi’s, Laura’s face lights up my phone. I haven’t fully fired her yet and know that if I don’t answer her call, she’ll keep calling until I do.
“Laura,” I say, spitefully.
“You need to come home, Zara.”
I close my eyes and count to ten. Her idea of home and mine are two completely different things. The last thing I need is to go home.
“This isn’t anything I can’t handle,” I tell her, knowing that
Barbara will issue a joint statement regarding the situation.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Zara. Gabe and Rusty were in an accident, and things don’t look good.”
My heart drops. I haven’t spoken to them since the video shoot. Mostly because they sided with Van and I felt like they were looking down on me for filing for divorce.
“Um…”
“I took the liberty of booking you on the next flight, which leaves at three. I’ll have a car waiting for you when you arrive at the airport.”
“Okay.” My words are barely above a whisper, not knowing what to say. I have known Rusty and Gabe since we were kids, and they were the first guys that Darian and I thought about when we started our band. We had all been band geeks together.
The rest of the ride is fairly quiet, aside from the radio. I cringe when I hear that I’m knocked up with Austin’s kid as if these people at the station know him so well to be crass about the situation.
I try to call Darian, but my call goes to voicemail. I try again, with the same result. His phone is off, which means he’s probably holding vigil by his best friends’ bedside.
By the time we pull into Levi’s driveway tears are streaming down my face. I can’t control them anymore. Levi greets us at the door, and his face falls as soon as he sees mine.
“What’s wrong?” he asks, holding onto my shoulders with his strong hands. I shake my head, and he pulls me into his arms before leading me down the hall and into his bedroom. “What’s going on?”
“Rusty and Gabe… they were in an accident. I need to go home.”
Levi nods and goes to his closet, returning with my suitcase. “Do you know what you want to take? I can help you pack.”
I cry harder, knowing that my heart is breaking for my two friends and because I’m leaving this man behind. I’d give anything to have him come back with me, but it’d be unfair for him to be holed up, waiting for me to come home.
“You’re so good to me,” I say as I collapse into his arms. He rubs his hands up and down my arms and slightly pushes me away so I can look at him.