The Decameron of Giovanni Boccaccio

by Giovanni Boccaccio

  THE THIRD STORY

  [Day the Sixth]

  MADAM NONNA DE' PULCI, WITH A READY RETORT TO A NOT ALTOGETHER SEEMLY PLEASANTRY, IMPOSETH SILENCE ON THE BISHOP OF FLORENCE

  Pampinea having made an end of her story and both Cisti's reply andhis liberality having been much commended of all, it pleased the queenthat the next story should be told by Lauretta, who blithely began asfollows, "Jocund ladies, first Pampinea and now Filomena have spokentruly enough touching our little worth and the excellence of pithysayings, whereto that there may be no need now to return, I wouldfain remind you, over and above that which hath been said on thesubject, that the nature of smart sayings is such that they shouldbite upon the hearer, not as the dog, but as the sheep biteth; forthat, an a trait bit like a dog, it were not a trait, but an affront.The right mean in this was excellently well hit both by Madam Oretta'sspeech and Cisti's reply. It is true that, if a smart thing be said byway of retort, and the answerer biteth like a dog, having been bittenon like wise, meseemeth he is not to be blamed as he would have been,had this not been the case; wherefore it behoveth us look how and withwhom, no less than when and where, we bandy jests; to whichconsiderations, a prelate of ours, taking too little heed, received atleast as sharp a bite as he thought to give, as I shall show you in alittle story.

  Messer Antonio d'Orso, a learned and worthy prelate, being Bishop ofFlorence, there came thither a Catalan gentleman, called Messer Degodella Ratta, marshal for King Robert, who, being a man of a very fineperson and a great amorist, took a liking to one among otherFlorentine ladies, a very fair lady and granddaughter to a brother ofthe said bishop, and hearing that her husband, albeit a man of goodfamily, was very sordid and miserly, agreed with him to give him fivehundred gold florins, so he would suffer him lie a night with hiswife. Accordingly, he let gild so many silver poplins,[301] a coinwhich was then current, and having lain with the lady, though againsther will, gave them to the husband. The thing after coming to be knowneverywhere, the sordid wretch of a husband reaped both loss and scorn,but the bishop, like a discreet man as he was, affected to knownothing of the matter. Wherefore, he and the marshal consorting muchtogether, it chanced, as they rode side by side with each other, oneSt. John's Day, viewing the ladies on either side of the way where themantle is run for,[302] the prelate espied a young lady,--of whom thispresent pestilence hath bereft us and whom all you ladies must haveknown, Madam Nonna de' Pulci by name, cousin to Messer AlessioRinucci, a fresh and fair young woman, both well-spoken andhigh-spirited, then not long before married in Porta San Piero,--andpointed her out to the marshal; then, being near her, he laid his handon the latter's shoulder and said to her, 'Nonna, how deemest thou ofthis gallant? Thinkest thou thou couldst make a conquest of him?' Itseemed to the lady that those words somewhat trenched upon her honourand were like to sully it in the eyes of those (and there were manythere) who heard them; wherefore, not thinking to purge away the soil,but to return blow for blow, she promptly answered, 'Maybe, sir, hewould not make a conquest of me; but, in any case, I should want goodmoney.' The marshal and the bishop, hearing this, felt themselvesalike touched to the quick by her speech, the one as the author ofthe cheat put upon the bishop's brother's granddaughter and the otheras having suffered the affront in the person of his kinswoman, andmade off, shamefast and silent, without looking at one another orsaying aught more to her that day. Thus, then, the young lady havingbeen bitten, it was not forbidden her to bite her biter with aretort."

  [Footnote 301: A silver coin of about the size and value of our silverpenny, which, when gilded, would pass muster well enough for a goldflorin, unless closely examined.]

  [Footnote 302: _Il palio_, a race anciently run at Florence on St.John's Day, as that of the Barberi at Rome during the Carnival.]