Dustin, on the other hand, reminded me of how it felt to make my own decisions, how to be me. He reminded me how to breathe after holding my breath for so long.
Still, the question remained: After all this was over, would I be ready to let a man take a piece of my heart again? Either way, now was not the time to worry about past or future relationships. Starting a new relationship before another had ended, before the bruising had gone down, was the last of my priorities. I had to do what was right for me first. I had to learn to stand on my own two feet again and get my life back.
***
As we walked up to the house, Grace was just stepping out. It was Wednesday, and for the past twenty-five years of their marriage, she and Travis had made sure to go out for a date lunch or dinner together. She had prepared us a lunch of mashed potatoes, roast, and vegetables, which Dustin and I ate in silence.
After lunch, Dustin went to take a conference call in his office and I went to have a hot shower to get rid of the cold that had gotten under my skin. I pulled on leggings and one of the t-shirts Grace had brought me—white with Stony Creek in tiny red and pink rhinestones across the front.
Afterward, I perched on the edge of the bed, wondering what my next steps would be. I still hadn’t come to a conclusion when exhaustion swept over me.
I decided to take a short nap, but I was awakened by a nightmare I couldn’t recall, apart from the fact that Jude was in it—his angry eyes, the sneer on that face I had once found irresistible. Even while conscious, I felt his presence around me, so strong it was suffocating. On instinct, I frantically searched the bed for a white calla lily and sighed with relief when I didn’t find one.
Still breathing heavily, I stumbled into the bathroom and threw up in the toilet bowl. The very thought of him, the memory of his cologne, nauseated me. I washed out my mouth and splashed my face with tepid water.
When I went downstairs, I found Dustin on the couch reading The New York Times with one hand and drinking a beer with the other. He must have just showered. His hair looked darker from dampness and he wore a different pair of jeans and a crisp white t-shirt.
He looked up with a smile. “Did you have a nice nap?”
I ran a hand through my hair. “Not really. I had a nightmare.”
“About him?” He placed the newspaper on the seat next to him and waved me over.
I nodded and went to sit close to him, but not close enough to touch. I wanted him to wrap his arms around me and pull me to his body. I wanted to inhale his cologne, feel his heartbeat. But I couldn’t cross that line. I was too aware of both the physical and emotional danger that might be sparked by us getting too close.
I twisted my hands together and gazed out through the floor-to-ceiling window, watching a bird hop from one branch to the next. There was a herd of cattle in the distance, and the ranch hand Dustin had just hired yesterday was feeding a golden terrier that wagged its tail gratefully.
“I made a decision.” I turned to face him.
His face brightened with anticipation, his brown eyes glinting.
“That’s good. I’m here to help you in any way I can.” He twisted his body until he was facing me, our knees brushing. The simple touch sent my senses spinning out of control, but I forced myself to stay focused.
“I want to change my identity and move to a big city…maybe New York.”
Dustin stiffened and leaned back. He didn’t speak for a long time. The only sound was his breathing.
“I have to do this. It’s the only way for me to be rid of him without him hurting me again. As long as I stay myself, he’ll find me. I know he will.” I paused. “And he will kill me.”
He covered my hands with his. “You know I won’t let that happen. I will do everything to make sure—”
“You can’t protect me from Jude. He’s sick and dangerous. I can’t let him hurt you too. I just need… Please just help me get a new identity. You know people. Maybe somebody will know how…” My voice drifted off and died in midair.
“I don’t think that’s the right approach, Haley. You can’t just bury who you are.”
“Why not? I’m pretty much dead already.” Heat crawled up my neck. “What I’m doing… It’s right. It’s right for me.” I paused and inhaled. “For now.”
Dustin leaned forward again and looked me square in the eye. “What if he still manages to find you? What then? What if he doesn’t stop searching?”
I hadn’t thought of that. True, Jude had the resources to get the information he needed. “There’s a possibility he won’t. Searching for me under a different name would be harder.”
He reached for my hands. “Sweetheart, how long do you intend to run from Jude?”
“As long as it takes. I have no other choice. The risk of me going to prison if I expose him is too high. I’m not ready for that.”
“It’s almost impossible to fake an identity without landing yourself in hot water. You’re scared of prison, but if you take this route, you could still end up there.”
I slid my hands from his and dropped my head into them. I broke down as the bubble of pain inside my stomach exploded and agony wrenched through my body.
He ran a hand over my head and down my neck and back. His touch was warm and comforting, and after a few minutes, the sobs subsided.
“I don’t know what else to do.” I looked up at him, wiping the tears from my cheeks. “I feel as if every decision is the wrong one.” My voice broke. “I’m so scared, Dustin. I’m scared for me. I’m scared for you if I stay here too long.”
He pulled me to him and rocked me back and forth. “You don’t have to worry about me. I can take care of myself. I just want you to be safe.”
I pulled back and looked into his face, hope fluttering in my chest. “Or maybe… Do you think he could ever let me go? Do you think there’s any chance?” I knew the answer, but I wanted to hear it from someone else.
Dustin shook his head. “After what you told me about him, after what he did to you, I don’t think so, sweetheart.” He paused and blinked. “Some contacts of mine in Madison informed me that he didn’t even report you missing.”
“He wouldn’t do that. He wants to find me himself. And to kill me without anyone meddling.” I spoke so low I barely heard my own words.
“There’s something else you should know.” Dustin paused and patted the newspaper next to him. Since I arrived at the ranch, I had avoided reading any newspapers or magazines for fear of stumbling upon Jude’s face. “He sold all his businesses.”
I swallowed the rock inside my throat. What did that mean? A part of me wanted to hope that maybe he was afraid I would go to the cops and he planned to skip the country before they got to him, but I doubted that.
I sighed. “He has other unfinished business.” Me. He had nothing tying him now, no obligations. He was free to move around. He had enough time to invest in finding me. All the more reason for me to stop getting comfortable and start running.
Dustin made it clear he was against my plans to change my identity, but he did agree to help me no matter what, as long as I promised to keep in touch. We spent the rest of the afternoon discussing my options. I cried some more, and so did Dustin. Then he made a call to someone who might be able to get me a new life, but he was on honeymoon in China and wouldn’t be back for two weeks. Since he was the only person Dustin trusted for the job, I had no other option but to wait.
Before I called it a night, I did finally make the call to Cole. I told him everything. I gave him the go-ahead to dig into Jude’s life for no other reason than curiosity. I had a deep need to know who the man I had married really was—where he came from, what had really made him into such a monster.
Even though talking to Cole didn’t change my mind in the least about going to the police, I didn’t miss the relief on Dustin’s face when I told him I had reached out to his brother.
We cooked dinner together, and then he kissed me on the forehead and we said goodnight. I lay in b
ed for over an hour thinking about Dustin, enjoying the feel of his kiss on my skin.
I finally reached for Grace’s novel and managed to read a quarter of it. The love story had started to grow on me, and I’d probably have finished reading it if it hadn’t been for my upset stomach, which kept me in the toilet for a good portion of the night. Once I went back to bed, I felt so relieved I fell asleep quickly. I didn’t dream of Jude or Liz. This time, I dreamed of Dustin doing the things to me I’d read about in Grace’s romance novel.
Chapter Fifteen
Jude
Jude drew his right hand back and formed a fist, which he drove into the face of the woman beneath him. He heard a crunch.
She instantly stopped her fighting and whimpering and blacked out.
“Bitch. Why did you have to be so difficult?” Jude clenched his teeth with frustration and slammed another fist into her face, then another. The crunching sound turned to squelching. He stopped. Her face, which was now a mess of snot, tears, torn flesh, and blood, was no longer recognizable.
The bitch had messed with his plans. Everything had been running smoothly until now. This one decided to fight him, thinking she could win against his obvious strength. Now everything was ruined. She had greatly resembled Haley, but there was no way he could take a decent photo now. No point in embalming her and keeping her in the basement with the others. He had to find a way to get rid of her body and replace her with someone else. But he also knew he had to be careful.
The murders were all over the papers now. Cops were everywhere around Serendipity, ready to snatch up the prostitute killer. Jude wasn’t afraid of them. He could outsmart them any day. Just to prove he was untouchable, he had even had a chat with one of the cops on the street yesterday, telling him what a great job they were doing to protect the citizens of Serendipity. The fool had puffed out his chest and thanked him, and even said they had several suspects in custody.
Jude had made a mistake with Diana Maliano. She had been discovered in the lake by a school group on an excursion. Luckily, Jude had dug into her life enough and was able to pin the crime on her good-for-nothing boyfriend. He would probably spend the rest of his life in prison while Jude continued his mission undisturbed. He was actually starting to enjoy playing cat and mouse with the law.
He lifted his pulsing hand and studied the blood on his knuckles, then stretched out his bloody fingers to examine his ring finger. His stomach clenched with anger as he wiped away the blood to reveal the golden band. He had never taken it off. He still intended to keep his promise to Haley: “Till death do us part.”
Where the fuck was she, anyway? She must have gotten the message by now. Why the fuck wasn’t she reacting? She had his number, a private number only she knew. The only thing she needed to do was call and he’d take her back. And this time he would make sure she stayed forever.
He’d give her a few more days. If she didn’t return to him, he’d have no choice but to go out and find her. Shame, though. Part of the reason he hadn’t done that immediately was because he was so enjoying the feeling he got from killing. The raw power. He had never felt more alive.
Still naked, he climbed off the dead woman and went to the cellar. He found some bags and the tools he needed and went back upstairs to finish the job.
Just as he lifted the circular saw above him, one of his phones rang—the private one he kept for communicating with Nolan.
He ignored it. He was through with his brother. He had meant it when he’d said they should go their separate ways. He had given Nolan enough money to make himself disappear. Why couldn’t he just stop babysitting him and start over, like Jude intended to? Once he found Haley, they would have to move abroad. He already had everything prepared.
Their next adventure would be in Kenya. The fake passports and other paperwork had been easy to get. Even though he didn’t have much faith in banks, he had been impressed at the ease of transferring and keeping money abroad. They would live a comfortable life. But at the start, they’d have to live without the luxuries they had been accustomed to in the U.S. It didn’t matter. What mattered was that they would be starting a new life. He would be giving her another final chance. If she misbehaved again, he’d have no choice but to kill her in Africa, and no one would ever know.
The phone wouldn’t quit, so he dropped the saw and lunged for it. He pressed the button to switch it off. Then he switched on the saw and got to work.
Chapter Sixteen
Haley
“Going for your walk already?” Grace called from the kitchen when she heard me coming down the stairs.
It had become my routine over the past five days: At 5:30 p.m. I’d go for a short walk on the ranch, which included visiting the baby calf and its mother, sitting next to the babbling brook, and dropping by to greet the ranch hands who were usually getting ready to end their work day and hit a local pub. Sometimes Dustin accompanied them.
I entered the kitchen to find Grace’s back turned to the door. She was kneading dough on the worktop.
“I want to see if I can catch Dustin and the boys. I plan on tagging along today.”
Grace turned and gave me a motherly look. “Tag along? You mean to Krug?”
I inhaled. It sounded silly to my ears and the idea gave me stomach cramps just thinking about it, but I needed to get out. “That’s the plan.” I had been a prisoner for a long time. Earlier in the day I had even ventured out of the ranch, just to get my feet wet, and stopped at a few tiny shops nearby. I’d bought some necessary items. I felt uncomfortable having Grace run my errands again.
Grace smiled brightly. She had been trying to get me out of the house for a while. “I thought your going to the shops in the morning would be a rare occasion. I’m proud of you, love. That man shouldn’t stop you from living your life.”
I breathed in deeply and dropped into one of the chairs. “It’s scary, though. I keep worrying that he will see me. Today, at the drugstore, I saw someone who looked just like him from the back. He turned around and it wasn’t him.”
Grace went back to her kneading. “Like I said before, I don’t think you have anything to worry about. He wouldn’t think to come looking for you in this back of beyond.”
I rested my chin on my balled-up fists. “You don’t know him. A man with an obsession and too much money usually gets what he wants. I know it’s crazy, but even when I’m here, I feel him watching me.”
“But you can’t put your life on hold. You’d go just about mad. Either you go to the cops or you hide well and live your life.”
“Going to the cops is not an option at this point. I’m going for the second option… for now.” In just a little over a week, Dustin’s friend would be back from China to help me start my new life. “You’ll probably be gone when we get back. I’ll see you in the morning?” I stood and kissed Grace on her soft cheek.
“I’m guessing you’ll both eat at Krug? They have the best potato soup, served with fresh bread. I highly recommend it.” She turned back to her dough. “Say hello to Linda and Anton for me. They’re originally from Germany, you know. Been here fifty years, though.”
I stopped at the door and folded my arms, wanting to know more. “Are they the owners of the pub?”
“They sure are. Apparently krug means jar or jug in German. Try to have some fun, let your eyes sparkle for one night. You can continue worrying again tomorrow.” Grace laughed.
“I’ll try.” I waved goodbye and left the house.
Dustin and his men were overjoyed when I told them I’d be joining them.
“We’ll be the talk of town, being accompanied by such a pretty lady,” Johnathan said, nudging Mitch, the new ranch hand.
I laughed, climbing into Dustin’s truck as the others got into their own cars.
***
Krug, which was divided into a bar area and a restaurant area, was a bustle of activity.
Dustin took my arm gently and spoke into my ear, trying to raise his voice above the folk m
usic, laughter, and conversations. “Once they all get wasted, we can get something to eat.”
“Sounds great.” I watched a woman in a German dirndl push her way through a crowd of cheering men with a tray topped with plates of the largest pork chops I’d ever laid my eyes on. My mouth instantly watered. Forget the potato soup Grace had recommended. I needed to taste those pork chops.
“Do you know your mouth is open?” Dustin said as he led me to the table they had reserved in the back.
“Mine?” My eyes widening. “That’s not true.”
He cocked an eyebrow and pulled out a chair for me. “You were staring at Linda. Or was it what she was carrying?”
I laughed and sat down. “That food just looked so good.”
Dustin took a seat and so did the other men. They were already shouting out their orders. Except for Mitch, who was clearly still finding his place in the group. I could imagine it was difficult for him, since the others were much older than him. He had to be twenty, twenty-five at the most, with the biggest and bluest eyes I’d ever seen, and the looks of someone who should have been in Hollywood doing commercials or movies. Maybe he would one day. Dustin said he was only working on the ranch for a month.
“On second thought,” Dustin said, “would you prefer to eat first? We could get away from this crazy lot.” He slapped Sam on the back, a man who was opposite Mitch in age. I always wondered where he found the strength required to work on the land.
I shook my head. “No, let’s have a drink first.”
The boys cheered. “Our kind of girl,” one of them said. Mitch just stared at me, unsmiling. But he didn’t look unfriendly either.
Dangerous Intentions (His Agenda 2) Page 5