See Me

by Michelle Lee

  He could smell something cooking from downstairs and his stomach grumbled in response. He checked himself to make sure he was not too unbalanced to be around Mags and headed towards the kitchen. No one was in there, but whatever she was making smelled fantastic. He grabbed a soda from the fridge and sat at the table and looked at his stitched hands.

  Waves of guilt washed over him and settled heavy into his heart. All the lives he was ruining flashing through his mind. Sometimes he wondered why this thing just didn’t kill him and be done with it. He hated how his life had become and he was tired of trying to fight this thing. This oily black stain he felt growing in him.

  “Whatever you are thinking sweets, stop,” Mags said, walking behind him and dropping a kiss on the top of his head.

  “Mags…” Jax started.

  “No Jax. Stop.” She left him no room for argument and pulled out a roast chicken from the oven. Jax’s stomach grumbled loudly and she laughed. “That problem I can fix, so that is the only thing we are going to focus on, got it?”

  “Yes Mags,” Jax smiled wanly.

  Mags set dishes out in front of him, “Set the table please.”

  Like a robot, Jax went through the motions, but still didn’t feel like he was present. He’d eat, then hopefully sleep. Get to Denver tomorrow, and try to figure out a way out of this mess before he lost anyone else. Before he lost the rest of himself.

  I looked at the name of the driver on the card, Mark, and thanked him for stopping at a store. I jumped out of the car and ran in to the discount store headed straight for the clothing department. I wasn’t too concerned about style right now, I was more focused on comfort and versatility since I had no idea what the testing tomorrow was going to consist of.

  I spotted jeans, grabbed my size, grabbed a few colorful shirts that caught my eye, and went in search of leggings. Found a couple pair of those and headed to the socks. I could make do with one bra, but I needed more underwear and something to sleep in. I just grabbed the first thing I saw and added it to my growing stack.

  I went looking for shoes, needing some tennis shoes, and then went to grab a toothbrush, toothpaste, deodorant, hairbrush and some hair ties. My arms now full I went straight to the register and dumped it all on the counter. I winced at the total, my credit card was near maxed out, and I was thankful that I hadn’t had to pay for the hotel room or the flight.

  I paid and snatched up the bags and ran back to the car, huffing and puffing at the flurry of sudden activity. “Thank you for waiting!” I told the driver with a smile. “We can go to the hotel now.”

  I settled the bags next to me on the back seat and wondered where Winnie had gone. She’d show up eventually, so I wasn’t too worried. We pulled up to the hotel and Mark went to grab my bags for me, but I waved him off. I was perfectly capable of carrying my own crap. He gave me a kind smile and told me he’d be back tomorrow morning by 7:00.

  I noticed the hotel had a restaurant and I was thankful for that, I was starving. I made my way to the front desk and checked in. The gentleman smiled at me and told me everything was already taken care of, handed me my key card and relayed a message to me to keep my dinner plans open. I thanked him and headed up to my room which was on the top floor.

  Wall to ceiling windows greeted me as I took in the large suite, a little awestruck at the view of the Rockies and city sprawled out below me. Those mountains called to me on a deep primal level and I longed to just go explore them and the secrets they held.

  I dropped my bags on the bed and pulled out the clothes to hang them up. As I pulled out the shirts, I howled in laughter. I should have looked at them instead of just grabbing and running. One had “Gorgeous!” scrawled across the front in neon pink. The other had “Sexy Woman” written on it in a weird violet color. My own fault, but it was funny. Those were two shirts I would have never picked out for myself in any other situation.

  I pulled the tags off everything and put it all in the closet and sat down on the couch to just take in the view and be in the moment until whatever dinner plans were being made for me materialized. I must have dozed off for a bit because I suddenly awoke at the sound of knocking on the door. I scrambled off the couch and saw I looked a little rumpled, but really didn’t care all that much.

  I looked out the peep hole and froze. Ronnie and Smitty stood out there. Well, I guess we had to meet at some point. I unlocked the door and pulled it open smiling brightly, “Hello! Come on in,” I invited with a false sense of bravado. They were mouthwatering hot, and I wiped my hand across my mouth in hopes I wasn’t drooling.

  “Hi there,” Smitty said, somewhat shyly as he walked past me. Then turned around noticing Ronnie wasn’t behind him. He was still standing in the hallway staring. Smitty gave me an apologetic look and pulled Ronnie in, closing the door behind them.

  “I am going to assume my dinner plans were with you then?” I stammered out. Jeez, I needed to get a grip. I wanted to lick Ronnie. He reminded me of a white Jason Momoa, except that bruise on his jaw. Smitty could have been on a calendar with half-dressed sexy firemen on it. He had that look. Maybe I needed to get laid if my quivering belly was any indication.

  “Yes, we were hoping you would join us at the restaurant downstairs,” Smitty explained. “We wanted a chance to get to know you without the audience of the producers or the council, or well, to be honest, Jax.”

  “I’m starving!” I exclaimed. “Let’s go.” I felt like if I didn’t get out of that room, I was going to strip them both and climb them like trees. Damn! I hadn’t reacted like this to men in a long time.

  Ronnie still hadn’t said anything, and I saw Smitty smack him on the back of the head and grinned, herding them towards the door. “Lead on, little lady,” Smitty smiled. I liked him. Winnie was in trouble for not telling me how sexy they were in person.

  As they got in the elevator Ronnie seemed to stand very close to me, and Smitty stood closer than normal social convention would dictate, even though they were alone on the elevator and had plenty of room to spread out. I didn’t really care, I let my eyes rake them up and down, and was only a tiny bit embarrassed when they both caught me doing it.

  I looked at Ronnie, “So do you talk only on the show?”

  Smitty broke out in laughter, “He’s just a smitten kitten. Soon you’ll wish he would shut up.”

  Yep, I liked him. Well, I liked both really. I felt like I had known them for years. I wound my arms between theirs on either side of me and we headed into the restaurant. The hostess’s eyes popped out when she saw them, and I felt a little smug. “Can you get a table for me and my dates please?” I asked sweetly. Not having any idea where this personality in me came from. Maybe an alien had taken me over.

  “Baby girl, you just crushed that poor girls’ dreams,” Smitty breathed in my ear. My belly got tingles when he called me baby girl, combined with the warm breath in my ear, I think my underwear were soaked. This was sad.

  “I’m living mine,” I shot back at him, using my phone sex voice. That got a reaction out of Ronnie and he stepped closer, sliding his arm around my back pulling me to him. “He’s alive!” I teased him.

  “Oh, I’m definitely alive,” he murmured, my insides went to mush and my knees quaked. He was sex on a stick.

  “Food,” I said fast. “I need food,” I quipped, needing to put something in my mouth that wasn’t attached to either of these men. They brought us to a table and I moved from between them to sit across from them. I didn’t think I would survive dinner sandwiched between them.

  Ronnie looked at me, his eyes intense, and I felt something inside me shift. Some weird feeling in me that felt connected to him. “I think I just need you,” he said, his voice throaty and deep.

  Smitty cleared his throat, “Ease up dude.” He looked at me apologetically again. “I think what he means to say is we feel a draw to you,” he tried to explain.

  I shifted my gaze over to Smitty and felt the same connection. “I don’t feel the draw,�
�� I said carefully, “but I do feel a sort of connection that I can’t explain.”

  Smitty reached his hand out to me, and I took it as he shook my hand. “Officially now, I’m Smitty and it’s a definite pleasure meeting you,” he purred at me. My eyes widened at the contact and it felt like an electric current sizzled between our hands. One that was familiar. I pulled my hand back and looked at it, like there was a mark there or something. “Yeah, I felt that too,” he said quietly in awe.

  Not wanting to be left out, Ronnie clumsily stuck his hand out to me, and I was slower to take it this time. The moment our skin touch it felt like it glowed, but it too was familiar to me. “I’m Ronnie,” he said roughly, clearly being affected the same way I was.

  I dropped his hand, too startled to say anything, and was saved by the waiter. “Can I get you guys a beer, anything to drink?” he asked.

  “Water for me please,” I said automatically.

  “Iced tea,” Ronnie forced out.

  “Water for me too please,” Smitty said. “Can we get the appetizer platter to start?”

  “Sure thing,” the waiter smiled, walking away.

  “What was that?” Ronnie asked.

  I shook my head in confusion, I had no idea. That had never happened to me before. Smitty looked between us, “What are you talking about?”

  “When we touched, I saw a glowing line between us,” Ronnie said, his voice shaking.

  “Did you see anything when I was touching her?” Smitty asked, curious.

  “No, I just felt jealous,” Ronnie said with honesty. I didn’t know what to say. I hadn’t seen it, but I certainly felt it. “Did you feel anything Smitty?”

  “Yeah, but I don’t know that I would describe it as a line. It felt like electricity sparking along a live wire, but not painful, like a tingle,” Smitty tried finding words to describe it. I nodded, agreeing with him, that was what it felt like.

  “And familiar,” I added. “I feel like I know your touch.”

  Ronnie raised one of his eyebrows at that. “You felt that with Smitty?”

  “I felt that with both of you,” I clarified. “Can I try something?” I asked slowly, questioning my own sanity at this point. I held out both hands, one to each of them. They caught on and each took a hand, and the connection between us snapped in place, this time I saw it. It startled me so badly I let go of both in the next instant.

  We all gasped, and I went silent. “You guys have a bond,” Winnie whispered in my ear.

  I let out a yelp and jumped. “We talked about that!” I snapped at her. Then my eyes went wide with the realization of what I just done.

  I had two sets of eyes glued on me, Winnie laughing next to me, and my thoughts were scattered every direction possible. “It’s the angel in you, it calls to them,” she explained to me. “It’s like a soul mate thing.”

  Doing my best to ignore her so I didn’t look crazy any more than I already did, “Sorry,” I said sheepishly.

  Smitty to the rescue, “Well, we know you talk to Winnie, I’m guessing that means she just joined us?” I nodded mutely. “Can I ask what she said?” I shook my head no. I wasn’t about to repeat the angel nonsense to them. “Fair enough,” he conceded.

  A plate full of appetizers appeared in front of me suddenly and I was ecstatic for the distraction. I was in way over my head here, and Winnie seemed to know it by her snickering. I grabbed a cheese stick and stuffed it in my mouth, not trusting myself with words.

  Ronnie was watching my every move and it unnerved me because I felt like he was seeing things I didn’t want him to see, nor knew how to hide. “I can see I have some research to do,” he said cryptically. Smitty just nodded, eating like I was. “You’ll need to power load on food tonight for the testing tomorrow,” he advised.

  “What will it be like?” I finally found my voice.

  “It’s not physically hard, but it takes a lot of energy,” Ronnie explained. “It will drain you fast. Well at least it did to me.”

  Recalling the past few weeks I’d had, I would guarantee that statement. The waiter came back, and we ordered entrée’s and he left us alone. “What should I expect?”

  “Well the council meets with everyone that has abilities to determine what they are and the strength to see if the job will be a good fit or not. In this case, we requested someone fairly strong because of what has been happening with Jax,” Ronnie told me.

  “I am guessing then that the testing is different for different people,” I surmised.

  They both nodded at me. “The council can be a bit difficult sometimes, just please remember, it’s not personal. They are testing you, your reactions and your solution to the problem, so to speak. They believed me to be an empath, and while I do have a little of that, they aren’t really sure what to classify me as,” Ronnie said in a rush. “I have a sensitivity to other energies, but sometimes I can’t really read the emotions. I can see manifestations of certain types of energies, but not necessarily ghosts. Other times, I can see and feel things easily. Jax has told everyone he is an empath, and he is, but it’s a minor talent, where my talent is significantly stronger than his. I’d place a bet on yours being stronger than all you will meet combined,” Ronnie said humbly.

  “I’m an empath,” I told them both.

  “I think it’s more than that,” Smitty said.

  At the same time, Ronnie said, “There’s more to you than that.”

  Winnie chose that moment to burst out laughing again. “Why won’t you just believe me? Even they can sense it!”

  Aggravated, I exploded with, “I’m not an angel, Winnie!”

  And silence reigned across our table with that little outburst. “Research,” both men said at the same time.

  “I’ve got a few books I can look in,” Ronnie said. “The council would know for sure though.”

  I sighed, my nerves fraying a bit now. “I’m not an angel,” I argued quietly.

  “It would make sense if you were,” Smitty pushed gently. “Given the way people react to you.”

  “Can we talk about anything else? Please?” I begged.

  “Jax is flying in tomorrow,” Ronnie said. “But don’t worry, we’ll keep him away, and plus, you’ll be offsite somewhere testing.

  “Offsite? They don’t do it at that building?” I asked, startled.

  “A couple of them will,” Smitty answered.

  “The ones that will test your abilities will do so closer to the mountain range to alleviate any danger to the area, and people,” Ronnie followed. “The whole process takes a couple of days depending on the abilities. That’s why there is no return ticket scheduled yet.”

  I sighed. “Well I guess I get to see the mountains then, there’s my silver lining.”

  “You like nature?” Smitty asked.

  “I’d die without it,” I admitted. “Being in nature is how I release the stuff I take from people.”

  “I remember you saying that,” he said as our dinners were put down in front of us. “What do you do for fun?”

  “In general? Or in nature?” I asked, inhaling the aromatic scent of my food. I don’t usually eat a lot of pasta, but blackened chicken alfredo sounded so good to me. I dug in.

  “In general,” Ronnie responded, taking a bite of the steak he ordered.

  “I read a lot, I white water raft during the spring and summer,” I said around my food. “I like movies. I breathe music. I write a lot. I hike, spend copious amounts of time in nature. I walk when I need to burn off restless energy. I do yoga when I need to center myself. I go to the beach and walk for hours on end. I’m not really that exciting,” I said. “It’s not like I hunt ghosts,” I quipped.

  Smitty chuckled, “Well if you have been talking to Winnie then you know why we are doing that.”

  Ronnie’s face darkened. “She told you, right?”

  I nodded slowly, remembering her feelings for him. I had to tread carefully here, I didn’t want to step on her toes and hurt her feelings
by diving head first into this man that suddenly had a line connected to me. I reached out across the table and laid my hand on his, “I’m sorry the way things worked out. She loves you.”

  His face lit up in rapture at the contact and I went to pull my hand away, but he held it tight. “I think I’m in love with you.”

  Smitty choked on his chicken, and I laughed at that thought. They both looked at me strange. “Smitty is choking on his chicken. Choking the chicken,” I said giggling hysterically. Oh yeah, I’d lost my damn mind.

  They both cracked up laughing. “Oh, baby girl, I like you. We are going to get along great.”

  We finished our dinner, talking about nothing important, just getting to know each other, and I felt a warm glow of happiness taking root inside me, getting bigger the longer I spent with them. Most definitely there was a connection between us. I didn’t know what that meant, but I couldn’t argue it away either. Winnie disappeared before our food was finished, and as they paid the bill I glanced around looking to see if she was near.

  Not seeing her anywhere, I went with the guys back up to the top floor. They told me their rooms were up there too, but they came with me into mine. Happy that I wasn’t alone, I excused myself to take a shower, and got ready for bed. They looked a little startled when I came back out, but I just climbed in bed, feeling at peace.

  I patted the bed next to me on either side. “Can you stay with me until I fall asleep?” Both men settled on either side of me, I held their hands, letting that connection wash through me and lull me off to sleep, wondering who this person was I was becoming around them.

  Ronnie watched her sleep, the feelings rolling through him in pleasant soft waves. Winnie had been the only person he had ever fallen in love with, but he knew without a doubt in his mind that love was what he was feeling for the angel laying here. He said it out loud, “Angel.”

  He saw Smitty nod in agreement. It fit her. That inviting warm pull she emitted was like she was wrapping you up in love. He hadn’t felt this kind of peace ever before. It was better than any drug he had ever tried while seeking this feeling. They’d never encountered an angel before, and he had no idea what they were capable of. He knew that this situation had taken an interesting turn, and he worried about what the testing would reveal tomorrow.