Pao

by Kerry Young

  Daphne had Edmond clear and spruce up the garden. Trim the lawn and tennis court. Cut back the bougainvillaea. Weed the rose beds. Sweep up the mangoes from under the tree. Cut hibiscus and red ginger for the vases in the house.

  She had Ethyl throw open every window to give the house a good airing, and position two wicker armchairs next to each other on the veranda with one of them occasional table in between. And she had Ethyl place a ashtray and box of matches next to the cigars that she instruct Edmond to buy for her the day before.

  She had them shop for oysters and she get them make fresh hot red-pepper sauce. She even have Edmond wash and polish the Wong maroon Mercedes so that it could stand proud and gleaming in the driveway.

  Then she sit on the veranda, in Miss Cicely’s favourite chair, and wait. Ethyl tell me that Daphne wait there till the midday sun pass over. She wait till the afternoon shower come and gone. She wait till the smell of cool rain on hot grass fade and the sound of crickets begin to threaten. That was when I finally show up and the whole house breathe a mighty sigh of relief.

  ‘You don’t remember nothing ’bout it?’

  ‘No, Ethyl, I don’t. I remember I was later than I wanted to be, and I remember standing on the veranda steps with her asking me if I wanted to take some sorrel with her. But my arms was full of chocolates and grapenut ice cream for Miss Cicely and I didn’t want to stop. I just tell her I want to go straight through and she step aside so I could go into the house.’

  And then with Ethyl telling me all of this, I cast my mind back to the morning I go take Daphne to the airport, and how she hug me so long and close I thought she wasn’t going let me go.

  I sell the Wong house to a property developer who turn it into a nice little hotel with the swimming pool and tennis court and everything, even though they rip up the grass and put down a hard court because they didn’t want the expense of having to water it and tend it all the time in that heat.

  I ask Gloria if she want the house before I sell it and she say no. And then she say to me, ‘What I would like is a little place on the north coast. Back off the road, in one of them little coves outside Ocho Rios where Esther can bring our grandchildren and we can be together and relax like a family.’

  When we go up to Ochie to look for a house it turn out Gloria already know the place she want. It in a little cove, just like she describe it, with a private beach and a nice veranda looking out to sea. It small but it nice and fresh with the breeze blowing through it. And not only does Gloria know the exact house but the caretaker know her by name. It turn out that the house belong to Henry Wong. It still in his name even though him been dead all these years because nobody in Kingston don’t know nothing ’bout him owning it. So the sale complicated, but it Jamaica, so I pay the realtor and him fix things just fine. When I go sign the papers my mind reflect back to when Henry was laying sick in the Chinese Sanatorium and how Hampton tell me one day that he think him see Gloria up there and when I ask him who she visiting him say him dunno because him only see her in the car park. But I didn’t say nothing to Gloria because it seem to me that whatever happen between them was all a long time ago. And anyway, like Sun Tzu say, ‘ Do not linger in desolate ground .’

  40

  Terrain

  I get a phone call from Gloria. Esther have the baby and it a girl. ‘We have a beautiful granddaughter,’ she tell me.

  When I go see Esther and the baby, Gloria is there and she look proud and beautiful. She look more beautiful than the baby, because in truth I never seen a beautiful baby. Them always look sorta wrinkled to me. Not that I seen that many babies, but anyway.

  Esther look happy laying up there in the bed with the baby in her arms. And she ask me if I want to hold it, but I say no.

  So she say, ‘Go on. Just hold her a little minute. She not going bite you.’

  ‘Bite me! What she going bite me with? No, man, I worried I going hurt her, she so little and frail.’

  Then Gloria say, ‘She little but she not so frail. You ever think what she just done go through?’ And everybody laugh.

  So Gloria sit me down, and take the baby off Esther and put her in my arms, and she arrange me so I got the baby safe and secure.

  ‘What you going call her?’ I ask.

  Esther say, ‘Sunita.’

  ‘Sunita. Sunita.’ I repeat it to myself. And I look at this tiny little African, Chinese, Indian baby and I think to myself, Sunita, you are Jamaica. Out of the many, you are the one. And you won’t have no need to go back to Africa, or China, or India because this is where you belong, with your own identity and dignity. And I remember what Michael Manley say all them years ago, ‘We come too far, we’re not turning back now. We have a pride now. We have a place now. We have a mission now.’

  While Esther and Gloria still inside, Rajinder take me out on the veranda and give me a cigar. And just as I taking my second puff him say to me, ‘There was something that I wanted to talk with you about.’

  I look at him sorta quizzical, because all the time they been married me and him never had that much conversation to speak of. Rajinder is a university-educated man, we not got that much in common.

  ‘I’m sure you know from Esther that I got this job down at the docks some six months ago. It’s a good job, a good middle-management position. But the trouble is I have a problem with some of the dock workers.’ Him pause and look at me.

  ‘What kind of problem?’

  He look behind him inside the house like him worried ’bout who going hear. Then him sorta whisper, ‘I talked to Esther about this and asked her if she thought you might be able to help but she wasn’t that keen.’

  ‘What kind of problem?’

  ‘There is a small group of dock workers who don’t ever seem to do any work. They are on the payroll, but actually they spend the whole day playing dominoes, and sending out for food and chatting with each other. That is when they are there, because half the time they don’t come. They just don’t turn up, but they are still paid as if they are there every day putting in a full day’s work. This means that the others have to carry their workload, but they accept it because they are afraid.’

  ‘I know what this is.’

  ‘I’ve tried talking to them but it doesn’t seem to do any good. I mean, obviously there are procedures for dealing with underperforming staff except I don’t think they would be that receptive. And then three weeks ago one of them physically threatened me with a knife.’

  ‘So you ’fraid for your life?’

  ‘I am afraid, yes. But I also think it is a bad situation and I don’t know what to do about it. And well, I guess I am just going on hearsay and reputation when I think that you might be able to help.’

  Right then Gloria step out on to the veranda so I just say quietly to him, ‘Leave it with me.’

  ‘Is there something you can do about this? Esther is very reluctant about me even asking you. She thinks we should be able to handle it ourselves without getting you involved.’

  I look at Rajinder and then at Gloria and she say to me, ‘Rajinder already talk to me ’bout this. Is me tell him that it OK to ask you.’

  Next day I ask Finley to go find out what going on down the dock and when he come back it turn out to be just what I expect. It a little gang thing, the same way Kenneth Wong was drawing his wage from the supermarket all the time he was running errands for Louis DeFreitas. It a kind of double-income arrangement that work good for having something to declare on your tax return. And if the boss don’t like it, him suddenly find himself with a lot of union trouble.

  ‘But,’ Finley say to me, ‘this is the bit you going like. The little ringleader named DeFreitas.’

  ‘DeFreitas?’

  ‘Yah, man. Anthony, they call him Tony for short.’

  ‘So who would he be?’

  ‘Louis DeFreitas’s nephew.’

  I give this a lot of thought before I go do anything. I think about what Zhang would say to me if he was still here. I thi
nk about what Zhang must have said to Mr Chin all that long time the two of them sit up the top of the yard at Matthews Lane talking ’bout Merleen and the baby. I think about Sun Tzu, and what he would have to say about a situation like this. And I decide that both Zhang and Sun Tzu would say, ‘ The general who in advancing does not seek personal fame, and in withdrawing is not concerned with avoiding punishment, but whose only purpose is to protect the people and promote the best interests of his sovereign, is the precious jewel of the state .’

  And then I think to myself sure enough Sun Tzu right ’bout all these things, but maybe life not just a matter of strategy. Maybe it about something more than that, or something different anyway; something different from just ducking and weaving and manoeuvring; something that got more to do with what Zhang say ’bout benevolence and sincerity, humanity and courage.

  And then I think ’bout the time I had with Gloria when Hampton and Ethyl go up to Oracabessa. And when I was listening to Zhang and Ma talking into all hours of the night. And all the time I have with Michael. And I start think that maybe there is something an individual can do that make a difference.

  I ring Louis DeFreitas and ask him to come meet me at the fried-fish and bammy shack over Port Royal that Michael love so much. It is a place of peace to me, a place of calm beauty, and reasonableness. It is a place where men can talk from their hearts and not have to strike a pose or take a position.

  When Louis come over there he look relieved to be catching a bit of cool breeze instead of being trapped in the still heat of West Kingston like he is used to. His face look pale and puffy. And he got his thinning hair slick back. Maybe he even look a little like he stooping. Not straight and upright like he was in the old days. And he been losing weight as well.

  I say, ‘I want to thank you for coming.’ Him just look at me and nod his head. The waitress put down the food in front of us and rush back inside to the air conditioning.

  ‘I have a little problem, Louis, and I think you can help me with it.’

  DeFreitas look at me, but him still no say nothing. He just fix on the fish and start to eat.

  ‘We did a lot of things and we said a lot of things in our youth. And I don’t know ’bout you, but there was some of them I wish I hadn’t done. I wish I had thought better of. But look at us now, we old men you and me.’

  DeFreitas look at me for the first time like maybe he just start listen to me.

  ‘I got no fight with you, Louis. You use Samuels to sell your guns in my neighbourhood and I didn’t say nothing. I give you back the guns and I even give you Samuels.’

  ‘And you get to keep Chinatown in a fair exchange.’

  ‘Yes. I get to keep Chinatown and I not grumbling ’bout that.’

  DeFreitas ease back.

  ‘Then what happen to Samuels happen to him. And I didn’t say nothing. I didn’t say nothing even after you send Mrs Samuels to me to look out for. Even though you and I both know that was really your responsibility what with Samuels being your man at the time.’

  DeFreitas start pay attention to me now like him wondering where I am going with all of this. Him back stiffen a little and he grab on to the walking stick with the silver fox head for some sorta comfort even though him still sitting down. And right then I see that him done cut off the long fingernail on his little finger.

  ‘That whole thing with Samuels cause me a lot of trouble with my wife and her leaving me and such. But I not blaming you for that. That was my own stupid fault. Just like it was a stupid thing for me to go hire up Kenneth Wong. Hampton warn me against it and I didn’t pay him no mind. But then that is one of the things I do in my youth that I regret. Not that anything can be done about that now. But Kenneth getting killed really turn Fay against me and that is when she decide to run off to England with my children. And I can’t tell you how that grieve me.’

  DeFreitas start to look at me like maybe he understand what I talking ’bout. Like maybe he got some regrets of his own.

  ‘And even though I know this whole thing with Kenneth had something to do with you, I didn’t say nothing. Well now I got a problem with a situation involving my son-in-law. Your nephew, Anthony, giving him hell down the dock. My son-in-law can’t get nothing done because Anthony got the usual little gang thing going on down there. I don’t know if he working for you or if it just a freelance thing, but then a while ago somebody go threaten my son-in-law with a knife and now him ’fraid for his life.’

  I stop and I look at DeFreitas. He look at me like maybe there is something ’bout this that he care about.

  ‘I know you a father and grandfather yourself, Louis. Me, I only got the one grandchild, and I would like to see her grow up with a father as well as a mother.’ I take a pause. ‘I never ask you for nothing before. In fact I never ask nobody for nothing my whole life, but I asking you this. Get Anthony off the dock. Get him go take his gang and run his scam somewhere else. And get him leave my son-in-law in peace and good health. Do me this one favour.’

  DeFreitas don’t say nothing. He just rest up the walking stick and carry on eating his food.

  Then him say, ‘You right. This fish and bammy really good.’ And then him pause and I just wait. ‘I will talk to Tony for you, but I not making yu no promise, yu understand.’

  41

  Disposition

  After Edward Seaga get elected in 1980 things get better, but his government couldn’t grow the economy enough for people’s liking so by 1989 Michael Manley was back in power. But him older now, more circumspect, and I think the fire had gone.

  Then I start to think that maybe it wasn’t just from Manley that the fire had gone. It was gone outta me as well. And maybe it was gone outta Jamaica. It was almost like the whole island move into a different phase of life. We live through our turbulent youth and come out the other side. And that other side was a place of acceptance. Not a place of contentment, it didn’t feel as happy or as comfortable as that. Maybe it was a place of resignation. We become resigned to how things was, and we just decide to try do our best with that.

  It wasn’t a bad place to be. We had a kinda truce now that put a stop to the violence, and encourage back the foreign investors and the tourists. There was less talk of Africa and the Rasta revolution, less prophesising ’bout how Babylon was going to fall. Some said that instead of hope there was surrender. Me I just think that maybe we miss our chance, and I remember how many times Zhang say to me that people were against communism because they pronounce the word wrong, that if they pronounce it right they would feel better about it. He would say, ‘Emphasis not at beginning like comm-unism. Emphasis in middle, commune-ism.’

  And even though we still struggling to sort ourselves out after the English come here three hundred years ago and set everything up so careful and tidy – Africans on the bottom, the Indians, the Chinese, English on top – I think we doing OK. But I wonder to myself how many other countries there are like Jamaica? How many other countries been through what we been through? How many of them still going through it like us? All because some long time back somebody decide to pick themselves up and sail halfway ’round the world to come colonise us. And it not just about the English and the slaves. It about the Americans and the money.

  So one Sunday I go take a drive to see Michael and I stop off at Holy Trinity on the way. I park the car under the shade of a mango tree and go inside. The church practically empty. It surprise me. Every other time I been there the place was busting at the seams, all the pews packed and a whole heap of people standing, some of them all cram together at the back. The sun shining down on the altar, and hanging on the wall behind it a life-size carving of Christ on the cross and, above that, a stain-glass window of the same thing in blue and red and yellow.

  But this Sunday there was just a few young people getting them First Communion, in a heavy heat because the ceiling fans wasn’t doing a thing to help. So people was sitting there fanning themselves and listening to the priest tell the young people that
now they received the body of Christ, Christ was inside them and they should behave like Christ. That people interpret everything from within the worldview they have, and therefore they cannot understand another perspective unless they suspend their own past experience and what they think they know, and seek to understand what they see. And that Christ would help them to do that, like a uncle or godfather.

  Afterwards, when I see Michael, I give him the envelope I bring for him. He take it and look at me and say, ‘What is this?’

  ‘That is the arrangements for my funeral.’

  ‘Your funeral!’

  ‘I reckon it time I sort a few things out. I not going live for ever.’

  When he go to open it I stop him. ‘There will be plenty of time for that when it happen. You can let the glue rest till then.’

  Him look at me sorta quizzical so I say, ‘I feel like I come to a new place what with Zhang and Ma and Henry and Cicely gone. And then a while back I had to go ask a man for a favour. A man that I distrusted my whole life. And I discover that maybe my life don’t have to be all ducking and weaving and manoeuvring. Maybe I could afford to take my foot off the gas, especially after I get a fright about how all of this could end, and manage to make it through OK. So I think it time for me to count my blessings and stop reaching after something that maybe was nothing more than a idea I had about myself. Maybe it time I just be who I am and settle for something that is real.’ And then I laugh and say, ‘That is till the time when the Almighty make up his mind to come for me.’