Darling, There Are Wolves in the Woods

by Lydia Russell

  “I've done nothing to you.”

  “You bring happiness to my brother, little thing, when he deserves none.”

  Around us the dance had fallen into complete disorder; any illusion of civility had broken down as the drums thumped out their primal beat. Bodies sprawled on the floor, a tangle of torn silk, naked limbs and gasping mouths. Laughter filled the room, heavy and drunk and fearless. Mouths devoured, and hands caressed, the table of Goodnight Kisses standing empty. I shuddered.

  “Don't drink anything,” Nefina said, leaning back against the wall, her silvery gown flowing down past her feet as she turned to watch the madness.

  “Careful,” I muttered, “I may start to think you care.”

  She smiled, a quirk of her full lips and nothing more. “I would love to see you suffer, Teya, but not like that. Never like that.”

  A fey with a fox-like face swooped by and took up Nefina's hands, his mouth open in a strange grin, showing two rows of finely pointed teeth. He made to pull her back into the fray, and I saw that the front of her gown was torn, red marks marring down between her breasts.

  “Wait, please...”

  “For what, little thing?”

  “Tell me where I can find Luthien.”

  Nefina stopped, her hands still in the claws of the fox-fey, her pale skin beginning to flush as he tried to drag her away.

  “Luthien will destroy you, do you know that?”

  “Yes.”

  “She'll be on her balcony; follow the hallway with the fireflies in the stained glass.”

  She turned to me just as she was disappearing into the chaos, her eyes bright with mischief. "Take your time with her, little thing; allow me to have this night without her taunts and games. Let her punish you for Laphaniel's shortcomings and not me."

  I wanted to ask her what she meant, but she vanished amongst the writhing bodies and I was left on my own.

  I turned away from the ball and towards a twisting staircase, its golden handrails embedded with rubies. I cried out as my hand touched one, the jagged points slicing at my palm. Blood swelled against my skin and dropped onto the jewels. I watched as it dribbled down the gold, snaking over the rubies to pool over colourless gems. They absorbed the blood the moment it touched them, standing out like cut glass until, like the others, they glimmered scarlet. Shaking my head, I realised they were not rubies at all, but pieces of broken mirror. It was unfathomable how much blood had spilled in Luthien’s home so that it seeped from the very fixings of her mansion.

  I found my way up to the balcony with little difficulty, making sure I kept my hands to myself and didn't touch anything. I walked past the windows with the fireflies, hardly surprised when I found out that they were real insects trapped within the glass, their flickering lights casting desperate shadows over the otherwise dark hallway. I paused at the doorway, reaching out to touch the door that held not fireflies, but roses in full bloom within the pristine glass. I was careful where I placed my hand, not wanting to impale myself on the sharp thorns that pierced through the doors.

  The scent of wisteria hit me as I stepped out onto the stone balcony, its mauve flowers trailing up over the surrounding columns. In the distance, I could hear music from the Ball; a hypnotic melody mingling seamlessly with the faint sounds of screaming, all blending together to create an orchestra of pain and abandonment.

  “Do you know why I called you here tonight, Teya?” Luthien asked, reclining against a pile of plump cushions. Her black gown pooled around her feet like spilled ink, the neckline slashed down to her navel. I cringed at the thought of her being so close to Laphaniel.

  Her dark eyes met mine, cold and cunning. Her lips turned up into a cruel smile as she reached for the wine glass beside her and drained its contents without turning away from me. I noticed the empty bottles around her, another glass upturned on the little jewelled table, empty.

  “You want to bargain with me,” I said breathless, as her smile bloomed, and it was as dreadful as it was lovely. I tore my eyes away from her and settled on the daybed set in the centre of the balcony, its sheer white drapes floating in the wind like ghosts. The sheets were dishevelled, spots of blood soaking into the silk.

  “How do you know I do not wish to kill you?”

  “Because you would want an audience for that. You would make Laphaniel watch.”

  “Clever girl,” Luthien said, beckoning me closer. “I will give you what you came for.”

  She watched me carefully, noting how I cringed at her words. She knew...as much as I had known all along, that it was something I no longer wanted.

  “You'll let me leave?” I said, relief sighing from my body.

  “Yes.”

  Luthien waited patiently for my next words, anticipation lighting up her elfin features, almost softening them.

  “But you won't let Laphaniel leave with me, will you?”

  Luthien shook her head, spilling the soft waves of her hair over her shoulders. “I offer you Niven’s freedom and the chance to take her place.”

  I swallowed, a coldness taking over my body as I sunk to my knees at the thought of exchanging one prison for another. Luthien sat, triumph erasing any softness from her face and revealing the monster that dwelled beneath.

  “What about Laphaniel?” I asked, desperate.

  “I offer you solitude and your life, nothing more.”

  My chest tightened, splinters threatening to pierce my soul. “And if I refuse?”

  Luthien rose to her feet in a swirl of midnight, sinking beside me to take my face in her hands, forcing me to look at her. She caressed my cheek, her fingers chilling against my skin, her words a deathly whisper against my ear.

  “I will kill him, and you, my little lost thing, will mourn beside me for all eternity.”

  “You wouldn't...” I gasped.

  “Oh, but I would,” she said gently, her head touching mine. “In a heartbeat.”

  “If you force me into this decision…”

  “I’m not forcing you to do anything, child. I am giving you exactly what you set out for. I’m simply not accepting your paltry offer of a few years. What use have I for them?”

  “He will hate you,” I said, a sob forcing its way out of my body.

  “I would rather own his hate, bear his sorrow and his wrath, than allow you to have his love.”

  Luthien dropped her hand, snatching it away as if she couldn't stand to touch me a moment longer, and it left me to wonder if all love ended in madness.

  “What did he offer you?” I asked, tears running down my face. “What did you refuse him as he bartered for my freedom?”

  Luthien tilted her head, her own eyes shining as she reached to pluck a teardrop from my cheek. “He offered up his soul for you.” She placed her finger to her lips, closing her eyes, as she tasted my grief and despair. “I nearly took it just to spite you.”

  I felt the longing deep inside my chest become an ache. “I will give you anything,” I begged. “If you allow us to leave.”

  “Anything?” Luthien smiled and hope bloomed within me. “Would you give your sister’s life for your freedom, for his?”

  “Yes,” I said it without hesitation. I realised in that moment that I would leave Niven with Luthien again if it meant I could have Laphaniel.

  “I don't want anything from you, Teya.” Luthien said, turning her back to me. “You will leave at midnight, alone. Say your goodbyes to him, then go to that accursed castle and rot. Niven is waiting.”

  “No...please...”

  With a swirl of black, she spun and clutched at my temples. I screamed as darkness pressed against me, the feel of cobwebs swept across my skin, and the damp of mould glistened against my clothes. I choked on stifled air, feeling the ghostly weight of a crown settle against my brow.

  “I have chosen you as the next Queen of Seelie, Teya Jenkins,” Luthien snarled, her eyes an abyss. “May your reign be long and lonely.”

  I stumbled forwards as she released me, cla
sping my hands to my mouth to stop the scream that clawed at my throat. Luthien hovered beside me, the black silks rippling like shadows.

  “You have got what you came for, lost thing,” she stated, already melting into the darkness. “Love is never forever, remember that. Not for mortals and not for fey; it is fleeting and swift and merciless.”

  She left as the weight of my new destiny settled like irons around me, and it took everything I had to get to my feet and stumble back out into the hallway. The fireflies trapped within the glass buzzed incessantly, their lights a frantic flash in the darkness as I fell against the wall, a sob breaking from my lips.

  Knowing my choices had just ripped us apart, I made my way back to Laphaniel, wondering what I was going to say to him. How could I put into words that I had destroyed everything because I simply refused to listen to him?

  I didn't know how to say goodbye to him.

  He was sitting on the bed when I pushed open the door, glancing up at me with relief on his face. I tried to smile, but it died on my lips.

  “Please don't cry,” Laphaniel said, moving to my side in an instant and folding me in his arms. I was thankful to find he wasn't swaying any more. “I'll find a way to fix this.”

  I took his hand, squeezing his fingers, allowing the little lie to slip past my lips. “I know.”

  “I won't let her hurt you, Teya,” he said, his hand coming up to wipe the tears trailing over my cheeks. With a soft sigh, he curled his hand around mine, lifting my arm to gently spin me away before pulling me back again. My feet moved obediently, dancing the steps they knew by heart. “I didn't get to dance with you tonight.”

  “I know, I missed you,” I said, leaning against his shoulder as he led me in a dance with no music.

  “You look really beautiful,” he murmured, fingers trailing over the ripped and stained silk.

  I touched my head to his, breathing him in. “I really could do with a drink.”

  “Shall I open a bottle?”

  A laugh bubbled up past the despair. “I think you’ve had enough.”

  “I can't do anything tonight, Teya. I don't know how to make this right, but depleting some of Luthien's vintage liquor seems a fairly good start.”

  I smiled, hiding the pain beneath. “I'm not arguing.”

  I watched as he got up and grabbed a bottle of wine from a selection in a carved, elaborate cabinet and snatched up two glasses before moving back to the bed. I took the bottle from him, noting the chill of the glass against my skin, feeling it settle in my veins. The wine was thick and blood red, filling the air between us with overripe fruit.

  “You were going to give up your soul for me,” I said, draining my first glass, feeling it coat my tongue and burn my throat. I poured myself another, topping up Laphaniel's glass when he wasn't looking.

  “It still wasn't enough.”

  I reached for him. “What would she have done with it?”

  “Take it to pieces and make it worthless.”

  “Oh, Laphaniel.” I couldn't bear the thought of Luthien's hateful hands on Laphaniel's soul...on his body...breaking something that no longer belonged to her.

  “It's yours,” he said, watching with a wry smile as I refilled my glass again. “My soul and my heart are yours now, Teya. Always.”

  “Always,” I murmured, taking a large sip of the cloying wine.

  “Are you trying to catch me up?” he said, leaning close to kiss me, his lips stained red. He tasted of wine and misery, and I wondered if I tasted any different.

  “Oh, I think we would need a lot more alcohol,” I replied, taking another sip wishing I could drown my sorrows as he had done. “You've had a pretty big head start.”

  “I don't know how to make this right,” Laphaniel admitted, long fingers running down the edge of his glass. “I keep hoping I'll find an answer, but there's nothing.”

  “It's not your job to keep me safe,” I replied, needing to feel him close to me. “This is not your fault.”

  “I should never have brought you here.”

  “Don't...”

  “I should have made you stay," he murmured, leaning heavily against me. "I should have tried harder.”

  “I should have let you.”

  “I would...I would have made you so happy.”

  I nodded, unable to speak, watching as he emptied his glass, the darkness in his eyes lifting slightly as he rested against me.

  “My head's spinning...” he said thickly, trying and failing to lift his head from my shoulder.

  “Because you're drunk,” I replied, anguish strangling my voice, so the words came out raw, and broken.

  “No...I...” The glass slipped from his fingers, landing in the space between us, staining the bed. “Teya...”

  “I love you,” I said, as his eyes drifted closed. “More than you know.”

  “What...have you done?” he said, his words nothing more than a breath as I felt his body go limp against mine.

  “Laphaniel?” I shook him gently, but he didn't stir. His head lolled from my shoulder to rest against my chest, lips parted as he breathed deeply. I held him there listening to the softness of his breathing, staring down at the empty vial of Goodnight Kisses on the nightstand. Gabriel had been right after all, it had come in useful.

  I lowered Laphaniel onto the pillows, stroking the inky hair away from his face. A part of me wanted him to wake up and stop me from leaving, to scoop me into his arms and flee into the darkness together. But that would mean death, I had no doubts about that, and sleeping would always be better than death.

  I whispered my goodbye, my soul crying out for his and walked away. By morning, I would be long gone.

  Chapter Twenty-eight

  Not a soul stopped me from leaving, and with the chimes of midnight echoing behind me, I fled the mansion, running over frost tipped grass that soaked through the already ruined silk of my shoes. I ran past entwined bodies sprawled over the cold ground, their gasping breaths misting from parted lips as they paid me no heed. Discarded bottles were strewn around the winding pathways, upturned goblets lying shattered amongst the prone forms of intoxicated fey.

  I fled through the gardens, back into the woods, with no idea where I was supposed to go. In a moment of utter madness, I closed my eyes and spun in a circle, choosing my direction purely by chance. It was stupid and thoughtless, but I wasn't thinking and the emptiness within my chest was making me feel reckless. The forest could swallow me up for all I cared...better that than a lifetime haunting some forgotten castle.

  Midnight bloomed dark, despite the moon that hung fat and silver. The eerie light filtered through the treetops, catching the tips of frozen dewdrops so everything around me glittered. My breath fogged in front of me, the late autumn chill biting through the thin layers of silk that made up my gown. Fear settled around me like a physical presence, a familiar weight of despair that fit against me like a cloak. I fought to stay calm, to soothe the panic I could feel heating my blood.

  It had been a while since the dark had frightened me as it did then; every threat, every monster I’d faced had brought with it a feeling of terror I hadn’t thought possible…but I hadn’t faced them alone…I was never alone. With an instinct that nearly broke me, I reached out my hand, but the comfort I sought was no longer there.

  A howl tore through the stillness, shattering the quiet with a scream of hunger and fury. Another followed, feral…the sounds of nightmares, of dark shadows lingering within whispered tales, of archaic beasts without thought or mercy.

  My breath caught in my throat, my body readying itself as I decided whether to run or stay. I stood frozen, struggling to get a decent breath in around my corset and I silently cursed Oonagh for strapping me into the damned thing. Howls chorused together in a wild sonnet, their song a promise of blood and teeth and death.

  I chose to run.

  I bloodied my knees as I tumbled down slopes and over roots, clawing my way back up while I fought to keep the bellows of the w
olves behind me. My dress caught around my legs, slowing me down, the gauzy fabric snagging on thorns to tug me back. I couldn’t catch my breath, the corset was too tight, the boning digging painfully against my ribs. I fought to reach the stays at my back, tearing the silk but not the rigid casing crushing me. Stars burst before my eyes, my breaths an agony as my lungs screamed.

  I closed my eyes, reaching to steady myself as my vision wavered. I took a breath, sucking down a meagre amount of air that refused to clear the blackness settling over me. I slid to my knees, sprawling forwards as I desperately clung to consciousness. My head whacked the trunk of a tree and I passed out.

  Warmth misted over my legs, stirring me. The humid exhalation of breath on my cheek brought me back, as whatever it was, sniffed my legs and turned its focus on my face. It snarled, teeth grazing over my skin as I froze. Yellow eyes met mine, black lips drawn back over a muzzle that was longer than my forearm, thick globs of drool oozing over its panting tongue.

  I stretched my hand out along the ground, not breaking my gaze away as I fumbled for anything I could use as a weapon. My fingers found a crooked branch, damp with rot and moss...nearly useless. I swung it as hard as I could, but the wolf snapped and broke it easily with its powerful jaw, sending splinters flying. It gave me just enough time to get my legs working. I scrambled up, spinning on my heel to face the creature and kicked it hard, taking it by surprise. I managed to knock the wind out of it with a well-placed kick to the ribs, but I bought myself only seconds.

  Frantic, I dragged up one of the rocks it had fallen on, gasping at the weight before dropping it onto its skull. Blood sprayed over my face as it yelped, but I held the rock up again and brought it quickly down, until it stopped thrashing.

  I wanted to scream, but I held my bloodied hands over my mouth instead, my trembling fingers muffling the sounds of my panic. The howls rose up again, and with a defeated sob, I took off once more into the darkness.

  Clutching my cramping side, I fell to my knees, pressing myself as close to the base of an old tree as I could get, cringing against the cold wood while I fought for breath. It came out in painful gasps I couldn't quiet, and I couldn't stop the cry that slipped through my lips when I heard snapping branches behind me.