Not Forsaken

by Louie Giglio

  Likewise, Paul tells us to “be diligent in these matters; to give [ourselves] wholly to them, so that everyone may see [our] progress” (1 Tim. 4:15). The key word there is progress . As we diligently become imitators of God, we give ourselves wholeheartedly to the possibilities of our new genetic makeup, we genuinely develop in our spiritual maturity. We move forward.

  The writer of Hebrews encourages us to “move beyond the elementary teachings about Christ and be taken forward to maturity” (Heb. 6:1). This implies a steady and deliberate spiritual maturity. Not an immediate maturity, but a definite and gradual growth.

  James talks about how a tested faith produces perseverance, and how perseverance must “finish its work so that [we] may be mature and complete, not lacking anything” (James 1:4). Again, that passage implies a process that doesn’t happen all at once. We observe. We practice. We make mistakes, get up, brush ourselves off, and keep going.

  There’s one more family photo I’d like to show you. It’s me with my dad at Fort Walton Beach, Florida, on vacation, and Dad and I are both holding fish we (he) caught for all the world to see, and our images are almost mirrored to each other. I’m maybe ten years old, and wearing my favorite football jersey and swim trunks, yet what’s particularly interesting to me is how Dad and I are standing the same way. We’re holding the fish the same way. Everything about our postures is identical, except that he’s clearly my dad, and I’m clearly his child.

  The funny thing is nobody told us to pose that way for the picture. Whoever was holding the camera just said, “Hey, let’s get a picture of you guys and the fish you just caught” or something like that, and we both just struck the same pose automatically.

  There’s so much good modeling wrapped up in that picture. Sure, the process of learning how to fish took some time. Years earlier, Dad needed to show me how to bait a hook, where to throw the line, how to cast, how to reel it in. And then he had to patiently untangle the line after I got it all tangled up again. I can’t tell you how many times my dad and I had been fishing together before that single photograph was taken. Gradually, I was learning how to imitate my dad, little by little, day in and day out. Dad was committed to teaching me, and I was committed to learning from him.

  With our spiritual lives, that photograph is a great reminder of the process of discipleship at work. Our heavenly Father teaches us to discover who we are in Him. He is our perfect Father, and we are His beloved children. The process starts at our birth, our new birth. And then little by little, bit by bit, we grow into the very likeness of God.

  I don’t know what kind of earthly father you had, but I know that God has spanned heaven and Earth to reach you. And I know if you want one, the reality of a perfect Father can be yours. I pray your eyes are open to see Him as He truly is, and your heart is beating fast knowing His eyes are on you and His heart is for you. His blessing is full and free. The waterfall is pouring down goodness today. His spiritual genes have re-created you and His hand is there to lead you. You can take your next step as a loved daughter—a loved son—of the perfect Father.

  Epilogue

  Your New Story Has Just Begun

  I pray that you are sensing a shift in your view of God, and with new spiritual eyes you are seeing that you are not forsaken and never will be. Seeing that God is a trustworthy and good Father, the perfect Father you’ve always longed for. And I hope that you’re seeing this book as a letter from heaven, reaching you right where you are with a promise of a brand new way of life.

  Someone might be saying, I wish I’d heard this truth years ago. Would have changed my life.

  But the beauty is you’re hearing it now, and your life is changing as the love of God explodes in your heart, tearing down walls you built to protect yourself and building up confidence and faith in a God who is for you. A God who will not leave you behind.

  Do you remember the disciple of Jesus named Thomas? He was in the inner-circle with Jesus as He performed miracles, gave amazing teachings and moved from town to town, inviting people into the kingdom of God. If you do remember Thomas it’s likely your first thought about him is that he’s known as “Doubting Thomas.”

  If you haven’t heard of Thomas, he gets that description because he missed out on the moment when Jesus appeared to the disciples after His resurrection. On that momentous occasion Thomas wasn’t present. When told about what had transpired—that Jesus showed up and showed them all the scars in His hands and side from His crucifixion—Thomas didn’t believe it. Maybe Thomas was frustrated that he missed it, having the ultimate case of FOMO (fear of missing out)! Or perhaps he was like some of us, he needed more evidence before he could confidently assert that Jesus was alive.

  Whatever the case, Jesus was not going to leave Thomas behind. On a second occasion Jesus appeared to the same group in the same place. But this time Thomas was there.

  A week later his disciples were in the house again, and Thomas was with them. Though the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you!” Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe.” Thomas said to him, “My Lord and my God!” Then Jesus told him, “Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.” (John 20:26–29)

  Two things jump out to me as I read about this encounter between Jesus and Thomas. One, Jesus came back a second time. Jesus didn’t say at His first appearance, Well, it’s too bad My buddy Thomas isn’t here. Knowing him he’ll need the facts and will have a hard time simply believing I’m alive based on what you guys say. What a shame, he’ll probably get left behind. Nope. Jesus wanted Thomas to be in His resurrection story so He managed to arrange another visit when He knew Thomas would be there.

  The other thing that stands out from this meeting between Jesus and Thomas is Jesus’ invitation—“Put your finger here, see my hands.” Jesus was inviting Thomas to put his finger into the very scar where the nails had been driven through His body days before. Jesus knew that for Thomas to move forward he needed to stop pressing in on his “doubt” and start pressing in on Jesus’ scars, on the place where He was wounded for all of us.

  In the same way, you have now discovered that God wants to be your perfect Father and He doesn’t want to move on without you. And you’ve seen that He will heal your wounds as you link your freedom to the healed wounds of Jesus.

  I realize God’s work of restoration takes time, and I am aware that things between you and your dad might not change for the better. But there’s no going back. You are loved and you know it. You are free, and there’s nothing to fear. God has started a new work in your heart, and He’s not stopping now.

  I know I’ve shared a lot of stories about my relationship with my dad in this book, but allow me to share one more thing. It’s this—while life with my dad was far from perfect, I do know he was proud of me.

  A few years into his disability, and over a decade after that awkward conversation at the kitchen stove when I told my dad I was going to be a preacher, something powerful happened. Shelley and I were living in Texas, but I’d been asked to speak at my home church, First Baptist in Atlanta, on Father’s Day, no less.

  In many ways that opportunity was the fulfillment of my calling all those years back. On the Sunday night I shared with the church my response to God’s call on my life, I walked down the aisle in that same church building. My dad wasn’t there that night, but he did come this Father’s Day morning.

  Mom had him looking sharp, as usual, and his wheelchair was parked beside her at the end of a pew about eight rows back and just under the balcony overhang. I was nervous, as you can imagine, preaching for the legendary Charles Stanley and in front of several thousand people. Plus, “Big Lou” was in the crowd. He’d never heard me speak in any setting before, so it was a big deal.

  I didn’t look his direction a lot during my message, but I was so pumped he was there. An
d did I mention I was nervous! Interestingly, I was preaching a message similar to this book—about God being a perfect Father. I got through the message and at the end of the service stood near the front and shook some hands as people began to drift from the sanctuary. Most everyone told me I did a good job and that they were glad to have me back.

  Then I saw my dad. He and Mom had been surrounded by people too, especially given she was a pillar in the church before vanishing into the shadows as a full-time caregiver for Dad, and my dad hadn’t been through the doors since long before the onset his illness. I walked over to them and my dad reached up to shake my hand. He was looking at me with his piercing blue eyes and he flashed that grin of his that would make anyone feel like a million bucks.

  I think I managed to say, “I’m so glad you came,” even though I was more than a little choked up with emotion.

  “Are you kidding, Ace!” he said. “That was the best thing I’ve ever heard!”

  My heart was in my throat.

  I knew he wasn’t just being kind. I could tell he really meant it. Dad saw the gift God had put inside me. He saw me doing the thing that sets my heart on fire. He could sense the work of God through the words I was sharing. And I’m guessing that for a moment he sensed that there was a Father above who wasn’t just a bigger version of the one who had walked out on him, but a real true perfect Father who cared for him.

  All the hurt of our uncomfortable kitchen dance evaporated, and I felt my dad’s blessing on me and my calling. God had won. He chalked up a victory that day. His promise to restore fathers and their children was actually happening in real time. As a result, I know my dad is proud of me, even as a preacher, and I carry that affirmation with me to this day. Our story didn’t end up with my dad having a radical conversion experience. But thank God there was still time for him to bless me and for me to bless him.

  I realize a defining moment of receiving your earthly dad’s blessing is not possible for everyone. Yet I am confident God is going to put people in your life who will affirm that what He has been teaching you about Himself is true. That’s not to say we need somebody else to validate God’s Word. We don’t. But God has a way of using the body of Christ, the church all around us, to help us come to know the fullness of His love.

  Paul writes:

  For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. (Eph. 3:14–19)

  Maybe your earthly dad is not stepping in with a miraculous change of heart and a desire to bless you. Or maybe he wants to but doesn’t quite know how. But God is able to fill in the gaps left by our earthly dads.

  Remember, God is the One who gives back what the Enemy has stolen. He is restoring what’s been lost and orchestrating for you a story of overcoming grace. Surely somewhere around you He’s placed a messenger in His body with a “letter from heaven” reminding you that you are not forsaken, not alone.

  I’m not suggesting that a paper envelope with a postage stamp stuck on the back is going to float down from the sky. Rather that God has a way of putting people in our lives as tangible expressions of His love. Even if He didn’t, we still have enough truth about His blessing to live free as His sons and daughters. But it’s likely there is a friend or family member, a coach or a teacher or a coworker who is reflecting God’s love your way. Oftentimes that person is God’s instrument to encourage you to keep your eyes on Him and to never give up on His promises—to always remember your new identity in Christ and to stay anchored in His Word.

  To that end—the end of you never forgetting who you have become in Christ—I have stopped and prayed for you time and time again. Every other day as I’ve been writing this book something has been mentioned to me, a story has been told to me, confirming that this perfect-Father message is the one God wants me to share right now. I know God is doing all He can to get the message of His blessing to you. But your Adversary, the Devil, is working hard as well—trying to keep you broken down and hopeless and alone. So I’ve been praying and writing and praying some more.

  And then God dropped an actual letter into my hands that let me know once again that He is in the mix and that this book is landing in the right hands on the right day.

  Coming down to the last few days before the manuscript for this book was due, I was preparing to share a condensed, one-talk version of what I’ve written in these pages during the opening session of our annual Passion Conference. My heart was already tender toward the message of fatherhood since I’d been writing about me and my dad over the past year. That process was stirring up lots of thoughts about my family tree, and the realization that I know far too little about it.

  My desire to know more about my origins and my family was highlighted even more a few weeks before the moment I’m telling you about, the day I was preparing my talk for Passion, when my dad’s first cousin Bobby died and I was asked to speak at the memorial service. Though we were not particularly close, I was honored to share at his funeral, which was attended by about four-dozen people, some Giglios, some not. I left the cemetery that day determined to know more about my father and his father and his father’s father.

  Two weeks later I was at my desk on the afternoon before the opening session of the conference, reviewing my notes for my talk one last time. On my desk sat three unread cards and letters from various family members that had arrived that day.

  I’ll read those after Passion is over , I thought, when my mind is clear and I can read them with care.

  Then a little nudge encouraged me to read them just then. One was from Bobby’s son and one was from his older sister.

  The last letter was from his wife who for personal reasons could not attend the funeral service. In her note she reminded me that several years back Bobby had sent me a stack of research he had done on our family history, including information about my great-grandfather Vito who had lived and died in Atlanta.

  I re-read the sentence again, my eyes carefully tracing the words—including information about my great-grandfather Vito who had lived and died in Atlanta.

  WHAT?!?!

  What Are You Saying?, I thought to myself.

  My great-grandfather lived in Atlanta?!?!

  Why don’t I know this?

  Why did my dad never tell me about his grandfather Vito?

  This is crazy talk!

  I suddenly remembered that I had in fact received a package of photos and other memorabilia from Bobby a few years back, but it had arrived about the time we were moving and unfortunately ended up unopened in a drawer in my study. I shot up out of my chair and reached for the drawer. I found the envelope right where I thought it would be.

  My heart nearly exploded over the next half hour as I went through documents and photographs and handwritten genealogies about my family. I discovered that my great-grandfather, whom I had never once heard my dad talk about, lived in my city—in Atlanta—died a mile from where I was born and was buried twenty minutes by car from where I was sitting at my desk.

  Whoa!

  Add to this new revelation about my grandfather the line in her letter that underscored the reason she wanted to make sure I remembered the packet of information Bobby sent and knew about my great-grandfather. She wrote, “Our fathers are so very important in passing the blessing.”

  I was stunned.

  Bobby’s wife didn’t know I was writing this book, or wondering about my family tree, or that I was about to give a talk about the father’s blessing to forty thousand eighteen- to twenty-five-year-olds. But my heavenly Father knew all of that. And He wa
nted me to know He was for me. My perfect Father wanted me to be assured as I was giving the talk the next night that I was on the right track, and that He was with me.

  Your Father knows everything you’re going through, as well. He’s not going to end the story of your newfound “perfect Father-loved child” relationship where it’s beginning today. He’s going to continue to heal what’s been wronged on this earth and open your eyes to see how astonishingly beautiful He is—and how loved you are by Him. Be assured, “He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus” (Phil. 1:6).

  Your confidence in God doesn’t need to be based on whether or not you are handed a letter like the one I received. There’s enough rock-solid evidence in these pages for you to know you are loved by a perfect Father, truths rooted in the unchanging Word of our God and the finished work of Christ on the cross. Dig into His Word and keep your eyes fixed on the cross. But don’t be surprised when your Father puts an unmistakable reminder in your path.

  His ultimate promise is this, “I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you” (John 14:18).

  Receive it and breathe it in. Live it and reflect it to the world.

  You are not forsaken.

  You will never be left behind.

  You are chosen.

  You are dearly loved.

  You are not an orphan.

  You are not alone.

  You are a child of God.

  He knows your name.

  You are His.

  You are not unwanted.

  You are not powerless.

  You are who He says you are.

  You are not defeated.

  You are made new.