Simmering Ice

by Veronica Forand

  He whipped off his own glove and greeted the guy with an upper cut to his jaw. His arms were long enough to keep any jabs away from his own face. He punched again, breathless and pissed. The stripes stepped between them and forced him to back down.

  On his way over to the penalty box, he caught Zac’s confused expression. Whatever. He was allowed to lose his cool now and then. It didn’t mean anything. It certainly didn’t have anything to do with Annie refusing to give him a chance. Why the hell would she do that? He’d cared about her more than he’d ever cared about anyone. He’d thought about a future with her. Why’d she have to be so damn stubborn?

  The buzzer went off before he realized he’d been steaming for five minutes. He flew onto the ice. Zac circled him once asking him if he was okay. Of course he was okay. Why wouldn’t he be?

  Fedorov clipped him from behind and then made some stupid comment about having a bad morning. The asshole didn’t know the meaning of a bad morning. Alec threw his gloves to the ground again. His hands swung toward the idiot until blood sprayed across the ice.

  The linesmen pulled him away from Federov and escorted him off the ice. “You’re done for the night, O’Meara.”

  Kicked out of the game.

  He’d never been removed before. He’d never fought like this.

  He took off into the locker room. He should stay, but why remain and get into it with Coach. The buzz of the crowd faded away as his anger and frustration shadowed everything around him.

  Annie pulled up in front of her apartment. She parked her rental car and leaned against the headrest. For the first time in hours, silence reigned. No noise from the radio or patients or coworkers. Nothing to distract her now. Her conversation with Alec replayed in her mind for the hundredth time that day. Maybe she hadn’t explained things well, but at least she’d ended the call before she’d become a blubbering mess. Cringing, she shifted in her seat. It was over now. No more Alec.

  She needed to be thinking about finding an apartment and figuring out which car to buy, but his words filled her head and pushed out everything else. Exhausted didn’t begin to cover how she felt. All she wanted was to crawl into her bed and shut out all light and activity. Alone with her heartache. But that would mean declining her invitation to dinner, and if she did that, Elsie would worry.

  Drumming up the energy to move required monumental effort. She trudged up the walkway to Vito’s home, her head down against the sleet blowing in her face. The front door opened.

  Elsie ushered her inside and wrapped her in a hug. “I hope you’re hungry. I made lasagna.”

  “Perfect.” Her appetite had been nonexistent for the last two weeks, but she’d eat so Elsie wouldn’t worry. She hugged Vito and settled into her seat at the kitchen table.

  “The Hustlers won.” He smiled at Annie. “Did you catch any of the game?”

  She shook her head and lifted the serving fork. “I got out of work too late.”

  “Alec started two fights and was ejected from the game.”

  “Really? Alec fought?” She lowered the fork without putting any food on her plate. He never started fights.

  Elsie fixed her with a steady gaze. “He looked distracted and miserable. About as distracted and miserable as you’ve looked for the last two weeks.”

  “He called me this morning. I wasn’t expecting him to call at all. I told him we shouldn’t see each other anymore.” She glanced from Elsie to Vito and back again.

  “Why would you do something so silly?” White eyebrows rose, and Elsie’s features hardened in a frown.

  The time spent apart had ripped her heart to pieces. As hard as she tried, she couldn’t get the online photos of Alec with different women, smiling, always smiling, out of her mind. They were so polished and perfect. She’d never be like them.

  She took a deep breath. “You know his wife died. I keep wondering if he was trying to replace her with me.”

  “There’s nothing wrong with him wanting to get married again.”

  He hadn’t even brought up marriage. Her stomach clenched. “It wasn’t about getting married again. I look like her. What if he was only with me because it was like having her back?”

  “I’ve seen her picture. The only thing you have in common is the color of your hair.”

  “She was perfect. I’m just me.”

  “Just you? Just you?” Her honorary grandmother pushed back her chair and stood. “What’s wrong with just you? Nothing, that’s what. You’re amazing.” She shook the serving fork.

  Vito touched her hand, and she lowered the fork to the table. He turned to Annie. “There’s nothing worse than the pain of losing a spouse. Elsie and I have both been there. But you eventually have to pick up the pieces and move on. I’m not a replacement model for Elsie’s first husband, and she’s not one for me either. You’re allowed to fall in love again.”

  “He said he was falling for me.” But her own issues hadn’t let her believe it. Instead of voicing her fears and facing them head-on, she’d walked away.

  “It took us too many years, but Elsie and I finally realized how much we missed each other when we were apart, how much we relied on each other. If you find someone who makes you feel like you’re complete, you need to fight for them.”

  Elsie smiled and grasped his hand. Her eyes softened, and Vito looked at her with a loving expression. Annie glanced at her plate and blinked away the tears forming in her eyes.

  “You’re the daughter I never had, and I love you enough to tell you when you’ve made a mistake. I wish you would look in the mirror and see what I see. You’re beautiful and kind. You’re smart and have a big heart. Any man would be lucky to have you. You need to believe that.” The older woman’s voice brought Annie’s attention back to the couple.

  “I know how I feel. But what if it’s too late? Or what if he really is looking for Tamara?” The words came out as a whisper.

  Elsie came around the table and stroked her hair. “Talk to him. Really talk to him. You need to tell him how you feel.”

  She loved him. She had to talk to him and lay her heart on the line, open and vulnerable. But it might be too late. The images of the woman in the photos with him came back to her. She believed him when he said he went to every dinner alone, but so many women hung around the team, hoping to date a player. What if he’d given up on her and moved on to someone with less issues? The thought gutted her.

  Life without him was cold, hollow. She had to talk to him. Even if it ended in heartbreak, she loved him too much not to try.

  Chapter Eleven

  Alec stormed around his house, trying to find something to do. Despite his idiotic moves and ejection, the Hustlers had won the game. The team didn’t need him either.

  He settled on doing laundry. A very stupid choice. Among the towels and his dirty clothes sat a black lace thong. The intimate apparel of a person who needed space, and distance, and an entire lifetime of separation. He threw the towels back into the hamper and covered it up. It wasn’t fair. He had more than any guy should be permitted in a lifetime except the one thing, the one person, he craved beyond reason.

  The buzzer rang, followed by bellows and banging from his teammates. Damn. He wanted to be alone.

  He opened the door and stood back as five men pushed their way through the door and filled his den.

  Andre waltzed inside carrying an open bottle of champagne. “We thought you’d need to celebrate the win and the best fight of the year. Holy shit. Did you see the blood spew from Fedorov’s nose? A thing of beauty. We’re tracking down a video with the best angle. Just remind me to never get between you and the last beer.”

  “Don’t forget Fedorov’s vow to go after him when we meet up again. The guy is an utter imbecile. He should work on getting that ugly face put back together, rather than on revenge.” Sweeney sat on the couch and placed his feet on the coffee table.

  These guys didn’t look like they were moving for a long time. Mikael turned the gas fireplace on and
plopped on the floor in front of it.

  Alec turned to Zac. “Don’t you have a fiancée who needs your attention? And Johnson, you have a wife and a new baby. Go home.”

  Brock Johnson, Mikael’s back up, hopped on the recliner before Andre could sit there. “Valeria understands my need to blow off steam after a game. By the time I get home, I’ll be mellowed out and ready for some one on one action.”

  The other guys burst out laughing.

  “You’ll be staying up late with a crying baby, while your wife is asleep, dreaming of me,” Andre called over from a seat at the bar.

  Johnson gestured his response.

  Zac went into the kitchen to grab beers for the guys, and Alec followed to get away from the crowd.

  “Why are you guys here?”

  “To celebrate.”

  “Bullshit.”

  Zac turned and stared at him. He placed a hand on Alec’s arm. “I’m concerned about you. In a normal game, you would have laughed off the rookie’s comments instead of rearranging his features. You’re our rock. If you’re a mess, the team will fall apart.” He moved around Alec’s kitchen like a member of his family.

  “You won. You obviously didn’t need me.”

  “The final score was one zip. Your goal won the game. So I guess we need you more than you think. I’ve known you since college, and I can honestly say I’ve never seen you fall apart. Something’s eating you up.”

  “Really? And what is my diagnosis, Dr. Freud?”

  Zac placed a few bottles of beer in a bucket of ice. “Annie.”

  He didn’t want to talk about. “Annie and I are over. End of story.”

  “Who broke it off?”

  “She did,” he grunted.

  “Why?”

  Alec’s temper heated until it hopped out of simmering straight into a boil. “Something about me getting carried away with everything. She thinks I make rash decisions like having her move in when she was in the accident and buying her a car.”

  Zac raised his eyebrows. “I doubt that. She adored you, according to Heather.”

  “Heather knew her for one night.”

  “The woman understands people. She fell for me immediately. She told me Annie had spent the evening gazing in adoration toward you.”

  Alec shook his head. He’d thought the same thing, but her feelings didn’t last.

  They headed back to the den and handed out the beers. Andre continued drinking the champagne from the bottle. Slash had settled onto his lap.

  “Call her,” Zac insisted.

  “Call who?” Mikael, still on the floor, leaned against the couch.

  “Annie.” Zac replied.

  Sweeney twisted open his beer. “What’s up? You two break up? Because I’m sure I could ease her pain.”

  No way was another teammate taking her away from him. His hand closed into a fist. “You step one foot around her, and you’ll look worse than Federov.”

  “Sounds like the great Sequoia is in love.” Johnson signaled Zac, as if they had the whole love thing perfected.

  Mikael tipped his bottle toward Alec. “Today, the man who can weather any storm is brought to Earth by a beautiful lady.”

  “I don’t want to talk about it,” Alec yelled. Damn, wouldn’t they shut up and go home and leave him to his misery.

  “Could have been worse,” Sweeney said. “She could have been like my bitch of an ex- fiancée. She had me buy her a car and a fifteen thousand dollar engagement ring before walking out with some New York suit.”

  “Annie is not a bitch, and she didn’t want the fucking car.” Alec’s composure boiled over into a seething froth of pissed off and the need to rip someone apart. “Everyone out. I’m done.”

  He stormed over to the bust.

  She didn’t want him.

  He lifted his ugly image and threw it toward the fireplace. The bust smashed into the stone and shattered. His face disappeared in a bang. Debris all over the floor and a cloud of plaster were all that remained.

  The only person who moved to avoid the fallout was Mikael. They all just sat on their asses and stared at the lunatic who’d lost his cool again. His fury subsided a bit, but lingered in the back of his soul, pressing to be released again.

  “What have you done to get her back? Anything to show her how much you love her or have you completely screwed up the best thing to happen to you in a long time?” Zac sat on the couch next to Sweeney and took a swig of his beer.

  “She wanted space, and I gave it to her,” he shouted.

  “Flowers are more effective.” Mikael moved over to the bar, away from the mess of plaster.

  “I have no idea what to do. She wants even more space now. She said she’d seen me in the press with you guys and some women while we were traveling.”

  Andre, trying to calm an agitated Slash, shook his head. “Damn. I bet Bridget was in one of the pictures.”

  “Bridget?”

  “She was Toby’s date.” Andre motioned his hands a good distance in front of his chest.

  “Fantastic. She probably thinks I left her and walked into someone else’s arms. Another impulsive, asshole move. She also mentioned something about not being my type.”

  “Sounds like Valeria. When we first dated, she was convinced I was looking for some peroxide blonde with silicone implants.” Johnson frowned.

  “Who isn’t?” Mikael asked.

  “Me. It took me months to convince her I wanted a short Italian spitfire. I finally broke her down.”

  Alec paced back and forth trying to calm himself. “Annie also mentioned not wanting to compete with a ghost.”

  “Tamara’s battle was in the news for months,” Sweeney said. “Your love story was like some movie of the week. Annie’s right. Hard to compete against that.”

  “Talk to her,” Johnson insisted. “If she’s even half as amazing as my wife, she’ll be worth the effort.”

  Alec needed air, so he stepped onto the back porch. The beach was beautiful. The normally clear night skies were overcast and a blanket of sleet covered the sand in a heavy snow ice mix. He’d love to show Annie the view, but he needed her back to do so. The guys were right. Convincing her that he loved her, however, was going to be harder than hell, especially if she didn’t want a grand gesture. Maybe he could win her back with a simple declaration of love. But she also needed to know exactly how insane she made him feel…and how he’d give up everything to keep her by his side.

  After helping to clear the table and wash the dishes, Annie wandered into the living room, anxious to get home and call Alec. She glanced out the window. The snow still fell.

  Vito joined her. “It’ll be a cold night. Temperatures already dropped below freezing. That sleet changed over to freezing rain, too. Do you want to stay here tonight?”

  “I’ll be fine.” They didn’t need her in their way. She tugged on her coat and hugged them both good-bye. The short walk between the houses took twice as long as usual. Biting wind and stinging rain slowed her steps. Finally, Annie reached the house and climbed the steps to her apartment.

  Packing boxes lined the wall. She set her purse and phone on her bed, then crossed to the mirror and stared at her reflection. Allowing her mother’s negative comments to color her own picture of herself had only led to heartache. She liked what she saw. She was happy with her accomplishments. Maybe it wasn’t so far-fetched to think that Alec had meant what he said. Maybe he really was falling for her. Maybe he really did want her, for herself.

  The wind howled and the lights flickered. She glanced at the lamp, then at the snowy road and shivered. Since she’d left Alec’s house, she hadn’t felt warm. She picked up her phone. Being vulnerable sucked. But being without him was worse. She scrolled through her contacts and paused over his name. She’d played in enough sports tournaments over the years to recognize the seconds-counting-down-to-zero, last-shot-in-the-game adrenaline spiking her blood, but she wasn’t prepared when it bloomed into a full body reaction—hands sw
eating, breath increasing, stomach fluttering, muscles tensing. Nothing she’d done had ever mattered more than fixing the situation with Alec. She swallowed hard and rolled her shoulders. With how she’d left things, he might only give her one chance to talk to him. She couldn’t blow it.

  Taking a deep breath, she dialed his number.

  Crack.

  She glanced at the window. The tree in the yard had bent over the roof of the house.

  Crash.

  In a flash, part of the ceiling caved in. Sleet poured in, sheetrock fell. She dove into the closet, arms raised to protect her head. Her forearms and knees slammed into the floor, taking the brunt of her fall. Behind her, something smashed to the floor. The lights went out. Heart pounding, Annie pushed to her feet, blinking in the darkness. Rubble created a wall between the closet and the room. She peered over the debris. Power lines dangled into the room. The black, sparking wires were too close to the mess covering her floor.

  She had to get out. She felt her back pocket for her phone and came up empty. Then remembered dropping it when she dove. It lay on the bed, covered in sleet. Swallowing the metallic taste of fear, she shoved at the sheetrock blocking her exit, but it wouldn’t budge. A wooden beam pressed against it. Overhead, something cracked. Wind whipped into the room. Power lines danced closer.

  She was trapped.

  Why would Annie call and hang up? Alec called back three times but received no answer. In this weather she could be stuck on the side of the road, or worse. The picture of her mangled car weighed on him until the terror of losing her permanently ripped a hole in his heart. He had to find her.

  It only took one phone call to track her down. After receiving an earful from Elsie about hurting Annie, she’d finally told him what he needed to hear. Annie was at home, safe and sound. Elsie also told him how much Annie cared for him, but her mother had been so successful in convincing her that men like him didn’t stick, that she refused to believe that he could love her. Silly woman, he could stick like Superglue.

  He drove to her house. Telling her he loved her in person would be easier than trying to explain himself on the phone. A knot tightened in his gut. The lights in the neighborhood were out.