Dysfunctional (The Root of Betrayal)

by Tameka Hicks

  Mia Burns, Yasmine Colvin, Tracey King and Randie Davidson were the four girls who were classified in a group of their own. They weren’t a five. They were a six, based on the fact that their folders were separate from everyone else’s. Mia and Yasmine are eleventh graders in my math class while Tracey and Randie are in my English class. I picked the pharmacy course as an elective class so I could learn something new. You know I am always down to learn "new things." The lights are off for the night. We can’t have television sets in our rooms, another stupid rule, so I’m about to listen to the music until I fall asleep.

  Write in you soon.

  YOU MUST LEARN HOW TO ADJUST

  The morning looked like it was going to be another beautiful day in Saginaw, Michigan. Tamara had decided around four this morning that she was going to pass on the "milking of the cow experience" for today's special project. It was hard enough to get back up once she sat down with her stomach being a nuisance. She was huge for six months and that stopped her every weekend from going outside with the rest of the girls on the farm. There was no way that she was going to kneel down on the side of a cow and try to milk it. If she wanted nasty milk, she’d might as well squeeze it from her own breasts and drink it. She looked out of her window at the laughing (cow milking mamas) or pregnant hyenas.

  Everyone there wasn’t pregnant; but 75% of them were, or had been before, including Randie, whose only sexual encounter with a male resulted in pregnancy. Her family was Catholic and abortion was out of the question. She was shipped to The Loving Center for two reasons: she was a pregnant lesbian and the family was ashamed. This place must’ve been heaven sent because she’s been here for three years without any hope of graduating anytime soon. This center isn’t free, so she’s milking her parent’s pockets as well as some of the bi-sexual girls (not to mention the cows too.) She’s enjoying every minute of this place.

  Tamara watched the horses run around the track a few times wishing that she was one of them, but soon realized that they were just as trapped as she was. However, she had a release date, and they didn’t. She sat in the middle of the bed writing a letter to Tyrese. She never had explained to him that she was six months pregnant, and he was the father, which he wasn’t. She wrote the address and directions to the center along with the days and times that she could have visitors. It was a three-hour drive, but she knew that he was going to come. She wrote to Nikki telling her to catch a ride with him along with a list of things that she needed from her.

  She hated the fact that she had to trust her with her man, but it had to be done. “Don’t let me down Nikki,” she wrote in her letter. She wrote a letter to Charles explaining to him that she was pregnant and the baby daddy was nowhere around and she was scared and needed a friend along with a list of things she needed him to bring to her like pajamas, panties, etc. She didn’t care that he had a new girlfriend or a child. She had him wrapped like a fly in a spider web. She didn’t know who fathered her child, but the baby was hers for sure. The stretching of her stomach and the Bruce Lee kicking baby proved that much. She had a pretty good idea who it was, but she wasn’t going to worry about it right now.

  Last week Jeanette, Lynette and Alexis wasted their free time trying to visit her just to get rejected. She would’ve gone down to chat with her aunts, but once she heard the name Jeanette, she turned around and refused to see any of them after a two-hour wait and three-hour drive. Alexis was heated and Lynette was indifferent about the situation, but Jeanette had expected it from her, that’s why she told them not to mention her name, but they had to.

  A few days later Barbara left a message for Tamara to call so they could have a talk about what she had done. She never called back because there was nothing further to discuss. She did, however, write a letter to her grandma with the words written huge on the paper: NEXT TIME they'd better GET MY PERMISSION BEFORE THEY COME HERE, LOVE

  YOUR FORMER GRANDDAUGHTER,

  TAMARA.

  The alarm sounded for the girls in buildings A through H to get ready for breakfast. Tamara had quickly gathered her belongings, practically running into the showers before everyone else came in. She always tried to be at least the second person in the shower to avoid bumping into Mia Burns, the center’s pregnant bully who made it her business to tell anyone within earshot that the owner was her Aunt. She would pick on people and get away with it because of her special privileges. This was going to be a challenge for Tamara but that kept her on your toes. She was bound to come up with something. She always did and she was going to show Mia how to get and use special privileges.

  There was a note on the door. Reminder: 8:00 a.m. Ultrasound appointment for T. Brown with Dr. Shavers In addition, new roommate Tina Young arrives at 5:00 p.m.

  Tamara had her usual altercation with Mia today like most mornings. The girl with whom she wanted to conspire with had other plans, which didn’t include Tamara. In fact, she didn’t hide the harsh feelings that she had against Tamara.

  Today, from her table she shot spitballs at Tamara causing her to want to smash her face in, but she refrained. She had a calculated plan for her, and she wasn’t going to let her mess it up for her. She planned to unleash the demons on her and make the bitch beg for mercy. She switched tables and sat next to Randie and Tracey. After breakfast when Tamara strode past Mia, she stuck her foot out and almost made her fall. Mia’s flunkies who sat at the table with her had all started to snicker and laugh. Tamara started to smack her with the tray, but caught herself, and they had a stare down for a minute.

  “If you feel froggish, then leap bitch!” Mia said, inviting Tamara to make the first move.

  Tamara kept on walking, counting to herself. The auditorium filled with sudden laughter, and everyone went back to what they were doing. She looked back at Mia counting to ten and took in quick deep breaths as she sat the tray on the counter. She thought, Laugh now sweetie… You will be crying later. I promise you that.

  “I’ll kick her ass for you right now Mara,” Tracy said, getting out of her chair. Tamara grabbed her arm. “Nah, don’t worry about it,”

  “I’ll cut that bitch’s head clean off her neck,” added Randie. “I’ll go to jail; I don’t have anything to lose!”

  “No,” she insisted with a grin on her face. “I’m a reformed girl. I have other shit to deal with right now, but thanks for the concern ladies. I don’t believe in being violent.”

  She doesn’t want to join me, so I’ll break her down to her knees. Tamara took the last sip of her orange juice.

  “Where are you about to go next?” asked Tracy.

  “I have an appointment with Doctor Shavers,” explained Tamara.

  “Are you going to the Rec room later?” asked Randie.

  Tamara replied, “How much money are y’all playing for?”

  “Five dollars,” replied Tracey.

  “I can guess I can take y’all money,” Tamara laughed.

  “Bet,” said Tracey.

  “Later,” said Tamara.

  Tamara rose from the table and Mia slithered out behind her. She pushed the elevator button going up. Mia bumped her hard calling her a bitch as she headed towards the stairs. She’s afraid of the elevators, Tamara realized.

  She decided to take the stairs because the elevator took too long. As she went into the stairwell, she heard Mia walking heavy like her feet weighed a ton. Tamara pictured Mia tripping her in the hallway the other day. Everyone thinks that I am scared of you so now I can do my thing. Payback is a mother. She thought back to the time when she walked into one of the bathroom stalls, and it read on the wall: FOR A GOOD TIME LADIES ASK FOR TAMARA.

  ROOM 123-from M.B Inside Dr. Shavers’ office

  Tamara lay shivering on top of the examination table with her hands resting across her chest as her thigh was exposed. “I’m cold Dr. Shavers.”

  “I’ll be done shortly Tamara.”

  Dr. Shavers typed some information into the ultrasound machine. Tamara didn’t know what to expect of
this machine, so she nervously asked, “Is this procedure going to hurt?”

  She chuckled. “Not at all,” she giggled. “I will squeeze some gel onto your stomach, and I will use this instrument here.” she showed her the handle used to see the baby. “I will place this onto your stomach, and I’ll be able to take pictures of the baby. Totally painless, just trust me.”

  You’re a doctor and I don’t trust doctors, she thought as Dr. Shavers lifted the hospital gown so she could place the gel onto her stomach.

  “You’re not kidding,” she laughed. “It is cold.”

  Dr. Shavers moved this instrument across her stomach as she looked at the monitor. “Oh my,” she said as a look of concern crossed her face.

  Tamara jumped up. “What’s wrong with my baby?”

  “Lay back down Tamara.”

  She bounced back up. “No, what’s wrong with my baby?”

  “I’ll be right back,” said Dr. Shavers. She snatched Tamara’s chart of the table and dashed out of the door. She sat up staring at a blank monitor. “What in the hell is going on with my baby?”

  Dr. Shavers banged on Miss Williams’s door like someone was after her.

  What now? I’m trying to eat,” thought Miss Williams. “Come in,” Miss Williams roared out. Damn it! Dr. Shavers came into the office looking as though she had just caught a glimpse of a poltergeist. “We have a problem Sherita.”

  Miss Williams took a bite out of her turkey and egg sandwich.

  “What now, Wendy?”

  “I was giving an ultrasound to Tamara Brown from room 12.”

  “I know her…and?”

  She tossed her chart onto the table. “Look at page nine.”

  She took one last bite of the sandwich wiping her hands on a napkin. “I don’t know what I’m looking at,” she explained as she put her glasses on.

  “I gave Tamara an ultrasound, and I found an error.”

  “Stop beating around the bush and tell me what’s going on,” she declared.

  I’m starving, she thought.

  The doctor walked in front of the desk pointing to the chart. “This is not right.”

  Miss Williams looked closer at the document. “What should it be? What she’s not pregnant?”

  “Yes, she is but there’s a problem.”

  “What is it? Damn it!”

  She pointed to the document again. “Look here, and here.”

  “You’re fucking kidding me right?”

  “No ma’am.”

  Miss Williams looked incensed at her newly acquired information.

  “You’re her doctor and you mean to tell me that you never discovered this problem before?”

  She collected the papers and placed the clip back on the folder. “Dr. Bell had seen her for the first three visits because I was sick. The last visit, I was going to take her, but I was backed up, so she offered to take some of the patients off my hands with Tamara being one of those patients.”

  “How long have you been a doctor Wendy?”

  She held her head down like her mother was scolding her. “Eight years.”

  “One more screw up like this, you will be out of here Wendy,” she said calmly.

  “I’m a doctor, but I make mistakes too. This was the first time that I’d seen Tamara as a patient.”

  She threw her sandwich into the garbage. “I don’t pay you, as well as I do for mistakes Mrs. Shavers. In this business there is no room for mistakes.”

  “I informed you as soon as I noticed it myself.”

  “You should have noticed it before today. Just because you were absent, is not a good enough excuse for me. It was your job to look over all your patients' files to make sure that everything was okay.

  “It’s all Dr. Bell’s fault. She could’ve told me.”

  “It’s always easier to blame someone else,” she giggled. “That wasn’t Dr. Bell’s patient, so she really didn’t care. She wasn’t getting paid to see her, you are.” Miss Williams flipped through her Rolodex for Jeanette’s number. “You’re excused.”

  “What am I supposed to tell her?”

  “Be creative, but don’t let her know.”

  Dr. Shavers grabbed the clipboard off of the desk and left the room as Miss Williams picked up the phone and began dialing.

  “Hello, may I speak to Jeanette,” asked Miss Williams.

  “This is she.”

  Back in the examination room…

  Tamara sat in the middle of the table swinging her feet back and forth.

  “Are you going to tell me what is wrong with my baby?”

  Dr. Shavers strolled into the room with another ultrasound machine. “Relax Tamara. I’d discovered that there was a malfunction with my machine, so I have to give you another one with this. The images from this machine were showing that your baby didn’t have a kidney and that freaked me out. Lay down Tamara.”

  She performed another ultrasound with the new machine. “There. That’s better. You’re having a healthy baby girl. Are your parents or another family member going to adopt the baby?”

  “Adopt? I’m keeping my own baby.”

  “Okay, you can get up and put your clothes back on. We’re done here.”

  “Doctor Shavers.”

  “Yes.”

  “Who would I talk to if I wanted to make a complaint?”

  “Complaint, what’s wrong?”

  She started biting her nails telling her, “I fear for my life.”

  “Fear, of whom?”

  She paused. “Mia Burns.”

  The doctor stopped writing. “You mean Miss Williams’ niece?” Oh shoot, she thought.

  “Yes, she constantly pushes and throws spitballs at me, and yesterday she almost made me fall down the stairs. She placed a knife up to my throat and told me that if I ever told on her, she would kill me.”

  “Oh no, that type of stuff is not acceptable here. I will talk to Miss Williams for you, and you should leave a complaint in her box at the security guard’s desk.”

  She smacked her lips. “I’ve already done that four times.”

  “Four times?” She asked puzzled, “Do it again.”

  “Thanks doc.”

  “I’ll see you in two weeks Miss Brown.” She passed Tamara another bottle of prenatal vitamins and some pamphlets about the physical changes that an expectant mother will experience in their final months before delivery.

  “She told me that she’s her niece, and she can do whatever she wants to whoever she wants to do it to.”

  “I’m about to see her next, do you want me to talk to her for you?”

  “Oh no, please don’t say anything to her. She’ll surely come back for me if you say anything. Let Miss Williams handle it. Please don’t mention it to her Dr. Shavers.”

  “I won’t, I promise.”

  She walked out of the office with a smirk on her face.

  WHAT GOES UP MUST COME DOWN

  Tamara sat on the third level stairwell thinking about Mia and how she was going to handle her problem. She had written another complaint to Miss Williams and made a copy of the letter in the library before giving it to one of the security guards.

  “Can you make sure that she gets this letter please?”

  “I always do,” she said, but not really caring if Miss Williams received the letter or not.

  Tamara sat on the stairs eating a candy bar that she remembered that she had stashed in her purse. “Mrs. Shavers works for the pig so why would she piss her off for my sake?” she mumbled to herself. I’m going to try and reason with her one last time, she figured laughing.

  The door had squeaked and Tamara stood up walking down the stairs slowly. There were two girls who she had recognized but didn’t know their names. They spoke and kept on about their business. She turned around and sat back down on the steps once they were out of sight. The door opened, and she eye-balled to see who was coming before she walked down.

  “Hey girl,” said her science classmate.

 
“Hey,” she said as she walked slowly down the stairs.

  “Where are you wobbling too?”

  “To the Recreation Room,” she went through the door on the second floor, but turned around and went back onto the stairs once she was gone. “I am about to die if I have to keep on doing all this damn walking up and down these stairs.” She gazed at her watch again. I’d been sitting on these steps for forty-five minutes waiting for this bitch,” she mumbled. “What in the fuck is Dr. Shavers doing? Delivering her baby?” The door opened again and Tamara reluctantly stood up.

  “I’ll be up here later,” said the girl.

  That’s her. That’s Mia’s voice,” Tamara listened. She walked slowly to verify that it was indeed Mia. “Yes, that’s her bitch ass voice,” she said underneath her breath.

  Mia said, “Hurry up. Fat girl,” she laughed.

  Tamara turned around with this expression on her face that made Mia feel frightened.

  “Move girl,” She nudged Tamara with her elbow. “You’re walking too damn slow and close to me.”

  She tried to brush past Tamara quickly because she felt in her bones that something was different about her today.

  “Excuse you,” Tamara yelled as she stuck her arm out to prevent her from passing. “Don’t storm past me.”