by CY Jones
Nodding, I pull my shirt over my head and wiggle out my jeans. Reaching behind me I unsnap my bra, and pull my knickers off.
“Happy?” I huff at the grumpy wolf, and he grunts in reply.
I put my boots and clothes in my rucksack and leave it next to theirs at the base of a tree. Nervously I walk back over to my dads with my arms crossed, hiding my chest. I have nothing to worry about as they both keep their eyes focused on my face.
“Don’t be nervous, sweetheart, this is part of who you are,” Conner tells me.
“It’s not that. I’m still worried I won’t be able to shift,” I say, voicing my fears out loud.
“Well don’t be. Your first shift is on us anyway,” Conner answers, cryptically.
“What do you mean it’s on you?” I question.
“Since you’ve never shifted before, this late in your teens you’ll need help from an True Alpha to make the transition.”
“And lucky for you, duckie, Conner and I are both True Alphas,” Caleb says, finishing Conner’s sentence.
I tilt my head to the side. All my nerves from before gone and now I’m just plain curious. “Ok, so what do I do now?”
“Can I touch you, duckie?” Caleb asks softly, walking in front of me.
Immediately I start to breathing hard. A barrage of horrible flashbacks consumes me. My anxiety takes hold, and my fight and flight instinct kicks in. Closing my eyes, I take a deep breath and blow it out in an effort to calm myself, before I embarrass myself further and have a total breakdown in front of my dads right here in the forest. I repeat this process another couple of times before I open my eyes and see two angry men looking down at me.
“When I catch O’Donnell I’m going to take my time peeling his skin from his bones,” Conner growls. All signs of my carefree father are gone, and I believe each and every word he said. If I didn’t kill O’Donnell first, my dads would destroy him.
“Agreed,” Caleb growls.
“I only need to put my hands on your shoulders. I will not touch you anywhere else, sweetheart. I swear it,” Conners murmurs.
I nod, giving him my consent, and he moves back in front of me slowly like he would an wounded animal and places his hands on top of my shoulders staying within arms length. I almost laugh at the irony of this situation, because was I not a wounded animal.
“It’s ideal for you to close your eyes to concentrate, but I want you to stay as comfortable as possible so you can keep them open if you want. Now, I want you to visualize your wolf and hold on tight to that image,” Conner says softly.
I try to picture in my head what I thought my wolf looked like. It’s hard to concentrate without closing my eyes, so before I can talk myself out of it, I decide to trust my dads. I know they would never do anything to hurt me. They aren’t O’Donnell, so I close my eyes and think back to when my marking on my ribs first appeared.
“Rowen, you git, I’m going to kill you and Maddie,” I shrieked. “Who drugs their sister, takes her to a tattoo parlor, and gets a huge tattoo on said sister’s ribs? This isn’t ‘“The Hangover,” I said, studying the huge, howling black wolf tattooed on my ribs. I refused to admit to my brother that it was actually beautiful, with its glowing turquoise blue eyes that matched my own. I loved it. Somehow it felt right, and the detail was phenomenal. It looked real enough to jump right off my body. Whoever the artist was, they were truly talented.
“No you won’t, Bean,” Row said, giving me his puppy dog look. “You love us too much to us any harm.” I swear my twin had that look perfected. I could already feel my anger dwindling.
Something pressing on my shoulders snaps me back to reality. What I thought was a tattoo this whole time was actually my marking. Rowen and Maddie never took me to get it done. It must have appeared on my birthday, and they needed to tell me something, so they made up that whole story. I should be angry, but I wasn’t. Instead I close my eyes tighter, and try to concentrate on that image of my wolf.
I can feel my body warm, and a tingly feeling buzzes through my veins. My skin grows warmer, and Conner’s grip on my shoulders tightens.
“Caleb, I need help. Her wolf is fighting me,” Conner grits through his teeth.
I hear the crunching of leaves, then feel the pressure from Caleb’s hands over Conner’s. The heat increases to the point where it feels like my whole body is on fire.
Grinding my teeth together, I fight against the pain. Caleb growls, “Come out now,” sounding more animal than man. The power surrounding us is surreal and my ears pop from the intensity.
When the heat starts to subside, the tingling feeling from before grows, taking its place. I can feel my bones start to shift and crunch together. I scream in pain; I’ve never felt anything in my life that comes close to the agony I feel now. Both men tighten their grip on me as my body starts to fold in on itself until I’m standing on four paws instead of two feet.
“Brillant. She’s beautiful,” my wolf hears.
Seconds later two wolves stand in front of me, one midnight black like my own, and the other heather grey.
The black wolf moves closer to me, and I hear myself growl in response. Not deterred in the slightest, the wolf charges me, baring his sharp teeth. Quicker than I thought possible, the wolf jumps at me. On instinct I roll onto my back and using my powerful back paws I push the wolf away from me. He goes flying through the air, and as agile as a cat, he lands on all fours, and wastes no time charging at me again. This time he barrels through my body like a battering ram, and I land hard on the ground with the black wolf on top of me, pinning me to the cold ground. He clamps his sharp jaws onto my neck, holding me there and making it clear that he has the upper hand
I try to twist out of the hold, but it only makes things worse, pushing the wolf’s sharp teeth further into my flesh and drawing blood. Knowing we’ve been beat, the wolf in me concedes and starts to whines. Giving me one last growl, the black wolf releases me, and I hear Caleb’s voice in my head.
“You need to let Conner bite you,” he says, nodding his head toward the grey wolf off to the side watching us. Even in wolf form Conner looks amused.
“Why?” I growl, my wolf wary of them both.
“You’re a True Alpha,” Caleb explains. “Conner needs to draw blood to hear your thoughts. So far your wolf has fought us the whole way. The Alpha in her doesn’t want to back down.”
Still wary of them, I force my wolf to lie low on her belly. Once I do, and Conner sees that I don’t pose a threat, he moves by my side slowly, paying close attention to my movements. When he leans towards me and opens his jaws, my wolf growls, but I hold her in place, making her whine.
These are our dads. You need to let them bite us.
Again, she concedes and Conner bites down on my paw, knowing I won’t feel it. Immediately his voice fills my head.
“Are you ok, sweetheart?”
It’s weird hearing them in my head. Even weirder that something else lives inside my body. It’s like having a split personality with many members to choose from.
“Yes,” I answer, rising up off the ground.
Both my dads are huge, at least twice the size of the average wolf. I’m no slouch myself, maybe only a couple inches smaller and slightly leaner.
“If you’re both True Alphas, why did you let Caleb take control?” I question.
“Because, although Conner’s an Alpha, he’s way too nice when it comes to you. Your wolf needed to be shown its place in the pecking order.”
When Caleb moves, the grey wolf gets right in my face, looks me straight in my eyes, and lets out a terrifying growl that can probably be heard throughout the West Coast. My wolf drops down and rolls on her back, exposing her belly in submission, whimpering. Conner licks my face and lets me get up, but I avoid eye contact, lowering my gaze to the ground. Just like with Caleb, my wolf now recognises Conner as her Alpha.
“I’m not that nice,” Conner huffs as he takes off, leaving me and Caleb with no choice but to follow.<
br />
I don’t know how long we spend out there, playing and pouncing on each other. It must be hours. I can’t remember the last time I had so much fun. I’m free, and nothing feels better than the wind ruffling through my fur as I ran. I can feel my wolf’s agreement, and despite the shaky start, I know she’s having as much fun as I was. When we all trot back to the tree where we left our stuff, Caleb growls at me to change back. At first she fights the order. I can tell she doesn’t want to go back. “I promise I won’t keep you cooped up for long,” I tell her, and she gives me back control.
As I visualize my human form, the tingling situation I felt before runs through my body, and soon I’m standing on my own two feet.
“She fought you,” Caleb states once he’s in human form. This isn’t directed as a question, we all already know the answer.
“She didn’t want to be cooped up again,” I say, shrugging. I can’t say I blame her. I wouldn’t want to be caged again either so soon after my first taste of freedom. I guess my wolf and I have a lot in common.
“That’s understandable,” Caleb comments as he walks over to his bag. “That’s why I didn’t push it when you didn’t immediately shift back.”
I follow and quickly slip back into my clothes. The sun has just set, and the night air is a bit cold. No need to headlight my dads.
When we’re all changed and ready to go Conner asks me, “Do you think you can shift on your own now?”
“I believe so. I think the real challenge will be getting her to go back,” I admit.
“You two will work it out once she starts to trust you,” Conner reassures me.
“Well if she’s anything like me that will take awhile,” I mutter.
“You’ll get through it in no time,” Conner says, squeezing my shoulder in support as we start our hike back to the vehicle. When we make it to the SUV I’m beat, and by the time we get back to the house I’m ready to pass out.
Twenty-Five
Just because you’re twins that doesn’t make you two the same
“Did you have fun?” My brother asks as I flop down next to him on the couch, laying my head on his shoulder.
“Yes I did. I never felt that free before,” I tell him honestly.
Row puts his arm around me and pulls me close. “I know what you mean.”
Conner takes a seat across from us. “Did you know she was a True Alpha?” he asks.
“No, I had no idea,” Row responds.
I give him a suspicious look. “Why do you look so shocked, Row?”
“I’m shocked because I’m a Beta and not a True Alpha,” Row answers.
“Well that just proves I was born first,” I tease as I snuggle in closer to his body. I don’t know what it is, but I’m dying to be close to him and my dads. My wolf is intent on making a puppy pile or something. Are all shifters so touchy feely?
“You were born ninety seconds ahead of Rowen, but that has nothing to do with being a True Alpha,” Caleb states.
“What exactly is a True Alpha, and what’s the difference between that and a regular Alpha? Why does it even matter?” I question, confused by all this supernatural crap again.
“A True Alpha is a wolf that is born an Alpha,” Conner explains. “A regular Alpha are made, usually by killing the True Alpha of it’s pack, but that’s rare.”
“Oi, damn near impossible,” Caleb adds.
“True Alpha’s are extremely powerful,” Hunter says, walking in on our conversation.
“Ok, so how is it that you two are True Alphas,” I say, looking between my dads, “and I’m a True Alpha while Row is just a Beta?”
Conner glances between me and Rowen with a frown on his face. “I don’t know, sweetheart. Maybe it's the extra power you get from your mates that made you so much stronger than your brother, or you were always born to be one. I wish I could say I had answers, but I’m just as confused as you by all this.”
“I don’t mind that you’re a True Alpha, and I’m not, bean. You’ve always been stronger than me, even when we were kids.”
Row has a point even though I don’t like it. We’re supposed to be going through all this supernatural crap together, at least now that we were on the same page. I hate the blatant differences between us.
“I’m going to go find something to eat,” I tell them, getting up and fleeing to the kitchen, much to the disappointment of my wolf. She wanted to stay snuggling next to her brother. Now that I’m aware of her presence it’s much easier to distinguish her feelings from mine.
Only a few minutes pass before Hunter’s familiar pine scent fills my nose. Also, since I’ve shifted, my senses have started to open up.
“Can a girl make a sandwich without one of you guys breathing down my neck?” I growl, taking an angry bite of my yummy food.
“First off, you didn’t make that. It was already pre-made in the fridge, and secondly I’m nowhere near your neck, yet,” he says with a wicked gleam in his eyes.
“Stupid rational wolf,” I mutter under my breath.
“Now tell me what’s wrong,” he prods, pulling me to him.
I’ve never looked at Hunter as the type to confide in, Cody sure, but him? Definitely not. Maybe it was all the hate and hidden lust we were both harboring before that kept that barrier between us, but now, since things have changed between us, I want to tell him everything. He’s the priest and this is my confessional.
“Let's talk in my room,” I tell him, aware that my dads and brother can hear if we spoke in here. I’m glad I didn’t know that when Hunter finger banged me in here this morning.
When we enter my room, I open the balcony doors and step outside. The air is a little chilly, but it feels good on my heated skin.
“Now, siren, tell me what’s wrong,” Hunter says, holding me close to his warm body.
I lean my back against his chest and breathe him in deeply, his scent settling me.
“I thought now that I knew everything Row was hiding, that we could go back to how things use to be,” I admit out loud.
“What do you mean?” Hunter questions, softly nuzzling his nose against my neck. Maybe his wolf is touchy feely too. Maybe it is a wolf thing.
“We’re twins. I‘ve always known what he’s thinking and how he feels. I hated learning that he’s been lying to me all these years, but now he’s supposed to go back to being my twin, but it seems like we’re so different. It’s a feeling so foreign to me, and I’m having difficulty handling it.”
Hunter turns me around so we’re facing one another. “You know that’s crazy, right?”
“How so?” I question.
“You two may be twins, but you’re still two different people. You’re both growing. There is nothing written saying you two are suppose to grow the same way. He has his path to take, just like you have yours. Maybe they’ll entwine together, or they may go into two separate directions. Either way, you are your own person. Your experiences are not his and vice versa. Just because you’re twins that doesn’t make you the exact same,” Hunter explains shocking me with how wise he sounds.
“Wow, you’re really good at this. Are you sure you want to be a secret agent and not a life coach?” I tease, trying to lighten the mood.
Hunter chuckles and pulls me closer to his body, saying, “Maybe I should follow my own advice,” before kissing me soundly.
Panting, I ask him, “What do you mean by that?”
He runs his hand down his face and sighs. “Do you know why I hated you so much in the beginning?”
“Yeah, you blamed me for killing off your family, and you were right,” I tell him, looking away, ashamed.
“No, I wasn’t,” he says, grabbing my chin and forcing me to face him. Once we’re eye to eye he says, “I was wrong.”
“What?” I’m shocked. I must have misheard him.
“I was wrong,” he repeats loud and clear. “I hated you for all the wrong reasons. The night my pack was killed I had a big fight with my parents. My sister ratted me
out about kissing the Alpha’s daughter, and my dad wanted me to start being serious with Emily or leave her alone. I always held out hope of finding my soul bound mate, so I could never get serious with Emily. I hated my father for making me choose, and I was angry with my sister for putting me in that situation in the first place. My last words to my father were ones of anger.”
I gasp, and Hunter turns a pair of sad emerald green eyes to me.
“I hated you because I always held out hope of finding you. I hated you because I could do nothing as my family and pack were killed. I hated you because you let me live, and I wanted to die right along with my family after I found them. I hated you,” he says softly as his voice breaks, “because I needed someone else to blame when it was all my fault.”
At his words, my heart breaks, shattering into a million pieces scattered in the sand below us. My passionate fool of a wolf. How can one so brilliant be so wrong?
“No it wasn’t, Hunter,” I tell him, pleading with him to listen.
“Yes, Remy, it was. I should have been at my house with my parents and not off at Emily’s.”
I grab his face with both my hands and lower his forehead to mine.
“Listen to me and listen to me well,” I command. The True Alpha in me takes charge, giving him no choice but to obey. “The death of your family was not your fault. If you would have been there, you would be dead too. You would have left me, and I would have never known the arsehole I’m in love with today,” I tell him, admitting for the first time what I truly feel for him.
“You love me,” he repeats shocked. ”Even after the way I’ve treated you?”
“Yes, you idiot. I’m yours.”
Pressing forward, he kisses me with so much passion we could light the whole beach on fire.
Walking us backward, Hunter continues to attack my lips while he removes the clothes from my body. Not bothering with the buttons, he rips my flannel shirt apart, throwing it to the floor. Next he practically tears my jeans as he pushes me onto the bed and pulls them off. Pulling on the front of my bra, it tears next and my knickers quickly follow after.