Letting Go 2: Stepping Stones [Awakenings 5] (Siren Publishing Classic)

by Michele Zurlo

  Sabrina’s tone roused Jonas from the fringes of sleep. He’d heard the phone ring, and he was aware of her hurrying silently across the room to get it before it could rouse him. The sleepy intention of a smile slipped away as he went on full alert. She didn’t sound upset or pissed, only shocked, so he ruled out problems with the kids.

  He sat up as she turned to level an inquisitive and suspicious look in his direction.

  “No,” she continued, “I don’t know anything about it.”

  At her continued frown, he shrugged. He didn’t know anything about it, either. He didn’t even know who she was talking to, much less what they were discussing. Because her tone had gone back to normal, his interest faded. He gathered his clothes and headed to the shower. Their flight left at ten the next morning, so this was their last day at Elysium. Whether they were open or not, he wanted to show her the Fields of Punishment.

  He cleaned up quickly. When he emerged, he found Sabrina sitting in the chair near the slider wearing one of his cotton shirts. He liked the way it looked on her, especially with her sex-tousled hair, so he let her keep it on. He planted a kiss on her cheek. “Why don’t you go rinse off and then we’ll see if any of the restaurants survived to serve lunch?”

  She caught his hand before he could turn away and opened her mouth to say something, but she was interrupted by a male voice. Alexei or Stefano, he didn’t know which, spoke through the speaker on her phone. “Sabrina, what’s this I hear about you wanting to buy Elysium?”

  No words came to mind. This was one of the few times in his life when his mind went totally blank. Even when she’d shocked him five years ago by asking him to marry her without even introducing herself, he had about five ready retorts. It had been a matter of choosing the appropriate response.

  She wanted to buy Elysium? He took a step back to wrap his head around that one. Then a thousand thoughts flooded his mind. She would have to travel a lot to run a business in the Caribbean. There was no way she could fit in another responsibility. Between working and being a wife and mother, she was tapped out.

  She sighed heavily. “Lex, I don’t want to buy Elysium. From what I can gather, Ellen wants to buy it. She wants to go in on it with Sophia and Drew, you guys, and us. I can’t say I’m eager to buy a sex resort. The first thing I’d need to do is work on the advertising. I think more people would come here if they thought it was a honeymoon place instead of a meat market.”

  “That’s actually not a bad idea. We could restructure it to be more relationship-friendly, maybe host ‘meat market’ weeks once every six months to generate more interest. Of course we’d have to call them something else. I also think we should sell some of the rooms like a time-share instead of as a hotel.” As he talked, Lex sounded more and more excited by the idea.

  Jonas lifted a brow at Sabrina. While she was the one who brought the money into the relationship, she wasn’t one to make a large purchase without consulting him. She shook her head in a firm indication of “hell no.”

  “Lex. Calm down. Have you even looked into the business end of things? The Melbergs cut off money to pay the staff and purchase supplies. The manager is going to have a hell of a time trying to get people off this island. Do you honestly think a move like that isn’t going to kill the business? I want no part of this.” Sabrina fiddled with a strand of her long hair, drawing his attention to one of her best features. If he were to step back and be critical, he would have a hard time deciding what he liked best about his little woman. As he considered them, every feature stood out. Even the way his bulky shirt outlined the curve of her breast was sexy.

  “Sabrina? Stefano here. I made some calls. Elysium is going to tank, but that’s not a bad thing. If we let it go, we can pick it up for pennies on the dollar. That’ll actually make it easier to rebrand it, which was a brilliant idea on your part.”

  Sabrina rolled her eyes. “Why are you guys so sold on buying it? What aren’t you telling me?”

  One of them sighed. Even odds on who it came from.

  “Sammy wants it.”

  Lex consistently called Jonas’s sister by that name, though both of them spoiled the hell out of Sam. They were trying to make this happen because his sister had asked for it. That made sense. Still, Jonas wanted to know Sabrina’s opinion on the matter. Did she want to buy a share of Elysium? What did that mean about her opinion of their week here? He wasn’t getting a clear read on whether or not she enjoyed her role as a submissive. His wife was usually so easy to read.

  “So you’re still researching?” Sabrina sounded relieved. “Can we talk about it in a few weeks when you know something for sure?” With her eyes, she threw a question at him, and he wasn’t sure what kind of answer she was looking for.

  “Yes. I told Ellen not to make any sudden moves. I think she was going to catch the next flight to the nearest island with an airport. That’s another thing we’ll have to consider. Elysium needs its own airport. That would promote privacy.”

  Sabrina shook her head. “I’m going to let you guys go. Continue looking into this. I’m not sold on the investment, but I trust you. Take care, Lex and Stef, and give my best to Sam.”

  She ended the call and rose from the chair. “Damned if I can’t tell them apart in person, then they both have to get on the phone. They have the same voices, the same inflection, and the same way of phrasing things. I wonder if they do this with all of their business calls. It could drive people insane.”

  Jonas shook his head and guided her arms around his waist. “It’s a good thing there’s only one of me.”

  Resting her cheek on his chest, she hugged him and sighed. “One is plenty.”

  They stayed like that for a few minutes, enjoying the simple pleasures found in this intimacy. Then Sabrina peeled away reluctantly, an apology on her face. “I’m really hungry.”

  “Go shower,” he said. “I’ll find something for you to wear.”

  He selected a short, tangerine skirt made from a stretchy material that would be easy to move out of the way when the mood struck him. Then he grabbed a white corset-style top to go with it. Sabrina hadn’t been too jazzed with this part of Sophia’s present, but he had to admit their friend had excellent taste. It would provide the support Sabrina wanted, but in a way that revealed the swell of her breast and a bit of her nipple if he chose, and it left her shoulders and arms bare.

  When he brought the outfit into the bathroom, he found Sabrina at the vanity, brushing her hair. He took the item from her hand and looked at it, remembering with more than a little bit of cocky pride how she had responded to being spanked with it. He glanced up to find her studying him, as if she was waiting patiently for him to use it on her. He curled his lip regretfully. Maybe later.

  “Turn around. I’ll finish for you.” He loved brushing her hair. He couldn’t remember how long it had been since she’d allowed it to happen. No more. She no longer got to call those shots.

  She turned, offering him the gorgeous length that fell nearly to her waist. He started at the bottom and worked his way through her snarls. When they were gone, he spent some time watching her smooth, silky hair shimmer with each pass of the brush. In the mirror, he kept track of her facial expressions. She’d closed her eyes early on, and a contented smile played about her lips. He leaned around her and gave her a kiss. She parted her lips and yielded to him, her entire body softening, signaling him that she was his willing submissive.

  If her stomach hadn’t growled, he would have pressed his advantage again.

  They found one restaurant open in the main dining room at Hades’s Palace. As they walked along, he noticed how deserted the place seemed. Even the day before, he’d noticed there were fewer people on the island. It looked like Heather was following through on her plan to cancel all reservations. Part of him hoped Sabrina wasn’t seriously considering purchasing a share of Elysium. It was a hot mess they didn’t need.

  Another part of him wanted her to want to buy a quarter share. It was a cl
ue that he hadn’t completely misread her, that a part of her yearned for this life. One thing for sure, she was much easier to read at home. He wished she hadn’t insisted on waiting until Friday to talk things through.

  At the time, he hadn’t been totally comfortable with that arrangement. Part of him thought that if he didn’t agree to those terms, she would refuse this experiment in full-time submission. It would give them a chance to discuss the experience as a whole instead of just dissecting the daily portions. From the way she held his hand and the carefree bounce to her step, he would say the week was a success. But there had been some tense moments when he’d sincerely doubted his plan.

  She didn’t protest when he steered her into a chair. If they hadn’t skipped breakfast to stay in bed and make love all morning, he would have set her on the floor at his feet and fed her. It wasn’t something he would do at home unless they were alone. He wanted kneeling at his feet to be a refuge for her, a place where she could retreat to when the stress of daily life became too great.

  Really, that was his ultimate goal. He could see her being pulled in too many different directions. The demands of her job grew as she became more and more successful. Though she delegated a lot of the work, she bore the weight of responsibility like a lead cloak. Some days he wondered at how she held up. Add her quest to be the perfect mother and wife into the equation, and he was afraid she was going to snap.

  He wanted to give her alternatives, let her know she wasn’t alone. She would never be alone.

  Perhaps if she did buy a share of Elysium, she could quit her job and focus on this. Co-owning it with four dominant people would make sure she didn’t do more than her share. Ellen was just as type-A. There was no way she’d let Sabrina run the show. Alexei and Stefano had vast resources at their disposal. Sophia was much more laid back, but she also was the one most attuned to the nuances of Sabrina’s moods. He’d sent his lovely wife to Sophia for a session more times than he could count.

  “We need to think about souvenirs for Rose and Ethan. Maybe we should do some shopping today.”

  Sabrina’s voice broke into his thoughts. He hadn’t even thought about purchasing keepsakes for the kids. They hadn’t checked out the shops, but they probably should if she was going to seriously consider an investment in this place.

  He nodded. “We have some time. I didn’t plan an excursion today. I wanted to see the Fields of Punishment.”

  It had been awhile since he’d been to the island. He and Ryan had come here on a dare in college. Ellen had goaded them, challenging their collective manhood. Both were studying to be Doms, and Ryan’s mad crush on Ellen was still a secret.

  When they’d returned, Ellen had been shocked to find they’d gone at all. She’d pressed her lips together until they were white, but all her anger had been directed at Ryan. Within two days, she had him on his knees calling her “Mistress.” Jonas had been shocked at the time, but looking back, he could see all the signs he had missed.

  He didn’t want to miss those signs in Sabrina. She knew he’d visited here years ago with Ryan. She’d refrained from asking questions about his experiences, and for that he was grateful. He’d learned a lot from watching the Doms and Dommes at the Fields of Punishment. Back then, there had been a few teaching demonstrations. They hadn’t been in the firelight and sexually charged like the one Heather had roped him into doing on the beach. There had been nothing romantic about them. To his way of thinking, that’s the way a responsible instructor would run a demonstration. If the onlookers were too caught up in the moment, they would miss valuable information.

  Damn. If he didn’t watch it, he’d talk himself into teaching more than English and Brit Lit classes.

  He looked for Sabrina’s reaction to his plan, but she seemed to have none. She continued eating her lunch. He reached across the inches separating them and closed his hand around hers. “Honey, what are you thinking about?”

  She lifted her gaze, looking everywhere else before she landed on him. “I think Lex and Stef are determined to buy this for Samantha. Only I can’t imagine her running anything. She’s a wonderful person, Jonas, but she can be a little flighty and she has zero business experience.”

  He wanted to be offended that she’d labeled his sister as an airhead, but he wasn’t. Sam could run any business if she tried, but he couldn’t see her wanting to try. Her life with Lex and Stef allowed her to concentrate on her art. Jonas couldn’t remember a time when he’d seen his sister so continually and blissfully happy.

  “They’re not clueless. They’ll have people run it for her.” He gave Sabrina a reassuring squeeze.

  “Yeah,” she said dryly. “Ellen, Sophia, and me.”

  “Drew has built an empire from his cooking.” He meant to be helpful, but she only frowned. “Ryan and I have minors in business.”

  “I know. But Lex and Stef think they know everything about everything. I can stand having them as stepbrothers because my mom is finally happy. I can stand having them as brothers-in-law because they’re good for your sister. I’m not sure I can work with them.”

  Jonas threw his wrench into the gears. “I’m not sure you have the time to take on something else. You might want to consider what you’re willing to give up.”

  The shock for which he was waiting never came. He’d never said anything to her about the way she tore herself into pieces trying to have it all. She set her fork on the edge of her empty plate, and when she spoke, he had to strain to hear her. “I know.”

  “You don’t have to think about this until you get home. See what kind of information Lex and Stef turn up, talk to Ellen and Sophia. I’m not at all sure whether or not this is something I want you or us taking on.”

  His assessment seemed to comfort her. She smiled. “Shopping, and then the Fields of Punishment. I’m going to have to brush up on Greek mythology, I think. I don’t remember those.”

  “It’s part of the Underworld,” he said. “Elysium is where exceptional souls get to spend eternity. They have to die as heroes three times to get there. The Fields of Punishment are where those who have been bad are sent to suffer eternal torment, a kind of Tartarus, if you will. It’s the perfect place for masochists and sadists.”

  She nailed him with a worried look. “So it’s like an outdoor dungeon?”

  “From what I remember.”

  “And you just want to take a look at it?”

  He thought they might do more than look, but he didn’t have definite plans. If there was something that caught her attention more than other things, he might have her try it. “That’s the plan. It’s been twenty years. I don’t know if they have anything you’ll like.”

  She pressed her lips together, and he recognized that she was trying to hold in laughter.

  “You’re allowed to laugh.”

  Her smile grew and she shook her head. “I’m not into torture, you know. I can’t think there would be anything there I’d like. Isn’t that the point of the place, though, to punish naughty subs and slaves?”

  Releasing her hand, he pushed back a lock of her hair. “You know that not every sadist or masochist is into having D/s relationships, right? Think about you and Sophia.”

  Sabrina drew back a little. They’d never discussed what went on when she had a session with Sophia. He treated it no differently than if she’d gone for a professional massage. “Sophia is just a friend. She wouldn’t think of dominating me, but she does Domme for other people.”

  “Exactly. She flogs or whips or canes you, and then you go out to lunch. You’ll find lots of that in the Fields of Punishment. Being submissive isn’t for everyone.”

  He couldn’t read the emotion in her chocolate eyes, and that unnerved him a little. Was that relief or upset or indifference?

  She licked her lips. “I bet there’s at least a St. Andrew’s cross and a spanking bench. I like those.”

  He exhaled with relief.

  Later, after they’d discovered the gift shops were all closed,
he led her toward the Fields of Punishment. Things didn’t look quite right there, either. Most of the stations were abandoned and marked off limits.

  Sabrina looked around. Disappointment marred her chin with a frown. “It looks like Mistress Hera has had her staff meetings. I guess we were lucky to find an open restaurant. Good thing we’re leaving in the morning.”

  He heaved a sigh. He’d wanted to show her the place in action. “It looks like they haven’t done much to it. It had six stations when I was here before. I see eight.”

  Some of the stations were exactly the same. The single cross had turned into twin crosses, set up back to back so that someone being whipped could watch someone else receiving similar treatment. Jonas wasn’t sure he liked that. The submissive’s attention should be on her Master and what he was doing to her.

  Sabrina must have thought the same thing. “I would want a curtain between them. Even if it’s just a tree or a really tall bush, I think the areas should be separated.”

  “Yeah,” he agreed. “Or turn them so that they’re parallel. Voyeurs would like to see the masochist’s face. Sometimes that’s the best part.”

  A colorful bird landed on top of the nearest cross. It called a few times before flying away. Sabrina watched it arc across the clear sky. Her gaze came to rest on an object a little way down the path. “What’s that?”

  It was a circular object about six feet across. It had four beams radiating from the center. Each was sturdy enough to hold a person. Unlike the St. Andrews cross, it could be rotated into different positions. If he wasn’t mistaken, it was also mounted on a hydraulic lift that would tilt it back or lay it down. “That’s a Catherine wheel. It’s just like a St. Andrew’s cross, only it moves.”

  Sabrina stepped inside the area roped off to keep spectators at a safe and reasonable distance. She stopped in front of it and looked up at the smooth wood. “You could turn someone until they were hanging upside down.”

  “You could, if you knew what you were doing.” Equipment like this should not come standard anywhere. “Leaving someone upside down for too long can cause all sorts of problems. I’ve seen people vomit on these things.”