No Regrets

by Roxy Queen

  “What photos?” I rack my brain and come up empty.

  He picks up the phone and taps the screen. “Here.”

  “Ugh,” I say, scrolling through the photos. Picture after picture of me and Henry making out. I’m straddling his lap and his hands are all over my backside. At least the weed and paraphernalia are not in the shot. “Who’s account is this?”

  “It says ShellybeanD3?”

  “Freaking Shelly,” I sigh. “I was stoned and horny.”

  “Your two weaknesses.”

  I wonder if Henry’s seen this and if it would upset him. Probably not. Not much does, but I don’t like the exposure. Not after the video and all the fallout last year.

  We both stare at Henry across the pool talking to Tate. It’s the week before the Fourth of July and many of the families are out of town so things are a little slow.

  “I think you should go fuck him now,” Josh declares.

  “What? No,” I say. “I mean, sure I want to, but there’s the whole ethics of the ‘no sex at work’ thing and Henry’s on duty. Plus, Tate is right there and well, where would we even do it?”

  “Well, obviously the water is out. How about the office?”

  “No.”

  “Quickie in the car?”

  I consider it for a moment, but it’s 98 degrees outside. We’d suffocate. “Too hot.”

  What the hell did I mean, too hot? I’m not seriously considering this.

  “What about the changing room? It’s pretty spacious in there, shady and cool. There’s even a bench.”

  “Someone could walk in and Henry’s working,” I argue.

  Josh sounds pretty excited about this now and throws his legs over the side of the chair. He leans toward me conspiratorially. “Okay, this is what we’ll do. You walk into the changing room and get Henry to follow you. Lock the door. I’ll distract Tate.”

  “I don’t know,” I say, but one look at Henry and my libido overtakes me. He’s got both arms stretched up to the top of the shelter roof, fingers hooked over the edge. The waist band of his pants slides down revealing the white, non-tan skin. The soft, downy hair of his happy trail fully exposed. I ball my fists in determination and stand. “Let’s do this.”

  With my shoulders back and my chest forward, I make my way across the pool. I’ve already attracted Henry’s attention. Even Tate sees me coming, but then again, I’m wearing a bikini, which is pretty much all it takes. I pass the boys and tilt my head, suggesting Henry follow me. I don’t look back, but feel him behind me and sure enough, I’ve barely made sure the changing room is clear when he appears in the doorway.

  “What’s up,” he says, eyes everywhere but my face. He’s oblivious though, which makes this even more exciting.

  “Lock the door.”

  Henry’s eyebrows shoot upward and a silly, sexy grin forms on his lips. He turns the lock and closes the space between us. His skin is hot from the sun, greasy with sunscreen. The surprise make-out seems to be something he’s into; at least I assume this due to the noticeable tightness in his pants. His fingers tug and pull at my bikini top but I stop him, pushing him toward the benches.

  “Sit,” I direct. He follows my orders and slides his back down the wall until he’s sitting. I kneel before him and his jaw drops.

  “Yeah?” he asks. I nod and paw at his waistband and that’s all the instruction he needs. Moving quickly, erratically, he lowers his shorts and his erection springs free. His trunks fall to his ankles.

  I run my hands up and down his thighs, pushing his legs apart. I make sure to “accidentally” graze his cock in the process. This elicits the hottest, genuine shudder and he expels a long shaky breath. His pleasure makes me bold. I know we’ve only got a few minutes. Josh can only distract Tate for so long.

  “Ready?” I ask. Henry mimics me licking my lips.

  “Uh, duh. I mean, yes, please.” I roll my eyes and bend down. Tasting the tip and then the sides. I take him in whole.

  “Oh man,” he mumbles, pushing one hand into my hair and the other on my breast. A few minutes is all it takes and I have Henry worked into a trembling mess. “Pip,” he breathes, pushing at my hair but I don’t stop. Instead, I hold onto his hips, absorbing the convulsions that jolt through his body as he comes.

  Eyes closed, Henry sinks back into the wall, his breath heavy and strained.

  “You better go,” I tell him, even though I’m horny as hell myself.

  “Just like that?” he asks. “No cuddling?”

  “Sorry, babe. We can cuddle later.”

  “Damn right, we can. And will.” His voice cracks like a twelve year old.

  I walk over to the sink and mirror and make a lame attempt to straighten my hair and top. Henry’s face appears behind mine in the mirror and I feel his hand on my hip. I turn around.

  “You’re the best,” he says, his eyes filled with utter sincerity. He’s pretty freaking adorable.

  “You’re welcome?” I ask, more than say. I don’t think he hears me because I’m engulfed in a massive hug. His arms squeeze me so tight I can barely breathe.

  He finally releases me with a kiss, then unlocks and opens the door. Sunlight and heat burst into the room. I wait for a beat, squinting at the bright light. There’s no one around so I follow him out, adjusting the ties at my hips. No need to expose myself to everyone at the pool.

  I round the corner of the short hallway from the changing area and hear Tate call my name. “Zadie! I’ve been looking all over for you.”

  “You were?” Something about his voice sounds off and I look around. Josh is walking back to his chair and Henry’s already on his way back across the pool.

  “Yeah, babe,” he says, throwing his arm around my shoulder. “Wanted to make sure you were all in for the party on the fourth?”

  “The party?” I ask, trying to follow.

  “At the frat.” His eyes dart to the right, while flashing an encouraging, mega-watt smile. I glance over and see Lisa and her husband under the shelter. Admittedly, he does seem pretty interested in our conversation. “Remember?”

  “Oh, right, of course. I’m all in,” I say.

  “Great,” he says, giving me a hug, not unlike the one Henry just gave me in the bathroom. Well, physically it’s the same. The emotional connection falls flat. Post blow-job hugs are far superior to fake relationship hugs.

  I wiggle free from Tate and start back over to my seat with Josh. Halfway there I’m stopped by Lisa’s husband, Eric, who’s easing into the water. “You’ve got quite the fan club,” he says.

  “Excuse me?”

  “One boy to sneak around with—another for show. How do they feel about it?”

  My eyes flick to Henry, who is in the middle of an argument with an eight year old in the deep end. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “Of course you don’t,” he snorts. “Slutty college girls are a dime a dozen and typically your trivial love affairs wouldn’t interest me. Except I suspect they’re affecting my family. Marriage isn’t a game, young lady. Especially mine.”

  His tone makes me uncomfortable and I start to walk away. I’ve barely moved two feet when he says, “I’m curious what would happen if I revealed to Tate that you just had a tryst with that other young man. He emerged from the changing rooms looking quite pleased with himself. I figure you had something to do with that.” He winked knowingly. Gross.

  “Are you threatening me?” I ask, conflicted and confused about this situation. Who is he to threaten me?

  “Just speculating,” he shrugs. “Just like how I wonder if your boss would care that you’re all involved, you know, intimately? That you risk the safety of the swimmers to screw around?”

  Anger and fear build in my chest but I don’t react. He steps forward and in a low voice he says, “You don’t want to mess with me, Zadie. If Tate is hurting my family like I suspect he is, then I will hurt those he cares about in return.”

  I stare at him hard, giving him my m
ost disgusted face and walk away. I mutter, “Psycho,” loud enough for him to hear. Josh looks up from his phone with a grin but it fades as soon as he sees my expression.

  “What’s wrong?” he asks, frowning.

  I shake my head and pick up my book. My hands shake and I try my hardest to steady them. I realize now that Tate was right about Lisa’s husband being suspicious. I also know that I need to come clean with Henry. Sooner than later.

  *

  My fishbowl tastes like watered-down tequila, the juke box music seems especially loud, and my sundress is way too revealing, but I’ve come out with an ulterior motive. The plan is for the drink to make me bold, the music to drown out a possible scene and for my boobs to hypnotize Henry into thinking about sex instead of being pissed.

  One look at his semi-glazed over eyes and all three seem to be working. That would be great if I’d fessed up about Tate yet but I haven’t. He probably just thinks he’s getting lucky tonight. I figure that if he’s still speaking to me once this conversation is over, then that’s a pretty solid assumption.

  “These taste like crap,” he says, stirring his straw around the giant glass. “Where are Tricia and Josh? Did they bail on Fishbowl Thursday?”

  “They may meet us later,” I say. “Josh and Davey are pretty tight and even though she hasn’t said anything, I think Tricia may be seeing someone.”

  “Really? Why the secrecy?”

  “Someone at work I think.” I take a sip of my drink and run my finger along my sundress strap nervously. “Um, I had something I wanted to talk to you about anyway.”

  He takes another sip. “What’s that?”

  “Have you noticed how Tate’s been pretty huggy with me lately?”

  Henry sobers a bit. “Is he bugging you? Did he do something?”

  “No, not exactly.” I take a gulp of my drink and sigh. “Before we went to the camp that weekend I caught Tate and Lisa having sex on the office desk. I told him I would keep it a secret until we had a chance to talk, but instead Lisa’s husband showed up at work. Tate was convinced her husband knew and begged me pose as his girlfriend.”

  “What do you mean, pose?” he asks, warily.

  I lean forward. “Nothing big. Promise. Just hugs and stuff when her husband was around. I told him I wasn’t doing it more than the one time, but a hug is just a hug and not a big deal, except…”

  Henry runs his hands through his hair. “Just be honest. Did you sleep with Tate?”

  My jaw drops. “What? No.”

  He looks relieved enough that I’m sure he believes me. “I know Tate well enough to buy what you’re saying. I had a feeling he was fucking Lisa. There was just no way he’d keep his hands off her all summer.”

  “So you’re not mad?” I ask, feeling a wave of relief myself.

  Henry moves from his side of the booth and slides into mine. He wraps his arms around me and gives me a kiss. “Tate’s crazy and you’re beautiful. I’m just glad he didn’t try to hit on you because then I’d have to kick his ass. Again.”

  “Again?”

  His face flames red. “Yeah, he and I got into it when I saw him at your apartment a while back. He knew how I felt about you and I thought he was making a move.”

  I shake my head. “Nope, just using me to further his disgusting affair with Lisa.”

  “I made it pretty clear you were hands off. No wonder he told you not to tell me.”

  “I’m sorry I lied.”

  “You were being a friend and technically he didn’t know we were together,” he says. “But seriously, thank god I don’t have to really fight him over you, not that I wouldn’t, but I’m pretty sure he would win.”

  “He’s got pretty big muscles,” I agree.

  “Hey!” His lips form the most adorable pout. “I have muscles.”

  I run my hand over his leg. “So there’s one more thing. I may have agreed to go to a Fourth of July party with Tate and pretend to be his fake date.”

  His eyebrows knit together. “Why would you agree to that?”

  I explain how Lisa’s husband threatened me earlier in the day. Henry’s eyes blank for a second and I get a good idea what he looks like when he’s angry. “I think I should play it off one more night and then we’ll just settle this once and for all. He can’t hurt me or you now that I’ve told you. Tate and Lisa will have to be on their own.”

  “I can deal with one more night, but I’m probably going to go to that party too.”

  “Please do. You can keep me from making an ass out of myself again. Oh, by the way, did you see the photos Shelly posted of us on Instagram?”

  He nods. “Those were pretty hot.”

  “You think so?”

  “I know so,” he says, his hands reaching for the exposed skin on my legs. We’re halfway tangled up in the booth. “Want to get out of here?”

  This is what I love about Henry. He’s carefree and easy. He loves and he’s loyal. I search for the tattoo on his arm. Pressing my lips to the words, I follow him out of the bar and into the night.

  Chapter Thirteen

  I hear the music and crowd before we even get to the house and when we do, my jaw drops at the scene in front of me. Tate’s fraternity brothers may be a bunch of knuckleheads, but they sure know how to throw a party. Red, white, and blue banners hang from the face of the house. The front yard is covered in picnic tables and piled with food. Several guys, pledges I assume, man the grills and kegs line the porch. Girls in bikinis and shirtless guys are everywhere. Tate’s in the middle of everything, looking every bit the Greek God.

  “You said there’s a pool?” I ask Tate, who told me to dress for swimming. “I don’t remember there being a pool last time.”

  “Wait until you see it,” he says with a killer grin. He takes my hand and drags me around the side of the house. The backyard is covered in sand, obviously brought in by the truckload and there’s a huge above ground pool surrounded by wood decking. Coeds sunbathe on blue and white lounge chairs. “The pool is only waist deep, but that’s sort of just so we can see the girl’s tit’s and stuff.”

  “This is sort of amazing,” I say, trying to absorb everything and intentionally ignoring his gross comment.

  “Isn’t it?”

  The sun is starting to set, which is good for the heat. Henry and I worked the day shift at the pool, and because of the holiday, we closed early. Tate’s been here all day and from his slurring voice he’s had quite a bit to drink. His hand inches down my back. I move it and say, “Can we set some parameters?”

  “Sure.” He settles his hands on his hips.

  “Kissing on the cheek only. No lips. Also, no butt or boob grabs. You can hug me or wrap your arm around my shoulder or waist.”

  “All right. Anything else?”

  “I’m not drinking or smoking anything. Nothing. Don’t even offer,” I tell him. Then, because I’m tired of the games, I add, “Oh, and Henry will be here in about thirty minutes. He knows everything.”

  Tate’s eyes widen and he shifts his feet. “Everything?”

  “Everything,” I confirm. “Oh, and we’re dating.”

  He takes that in stride, nodding his head a little, maybe doing a little relationship math in his head. The bathroom breaks, cleaning the pump room… Tate may be a chucklehead but he’s not stupid. “How pissed is he?”

  “You know Henry, he takes everything pretty easily.”

  “Not when it comes to you,” he says, rubbing his jaw. “So, tonight. We’ll just present like close friends. Enough to keep Lisa’s husband and all the available ladies off my jock.”

  “Your jock?”

  He gives me a lazy grin and cups his junk. “Everybody wants up on this.”

  “Gross.”

  “Everyone except you, of course. Seriously though, her husband has been all over me. He’s sent some private investigator around. Asking the brothers about me, taking photos. I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s around here today. No way I’d be able to pick
him out in this size crowd.” He tosses an arm around my shoulder and we walk into the throng of people. Tate stops at a bar set up in the yard. “This is Zadie. She’s with me,” he says to the bartender. “She only gets non-alcoholic drinks. Got it?”

  “Got it,” the guy says, pouring me a red colored drink out of a pitcher. He hands it over and I sniff it. The bartender assures me by saying, “Virgin.”

  We take our drinks and I ask the question I’ve been holding on to. “So you think Eric’s investigator is taking photos?”

  “Lisa thinks he’s trying to build a case against her.”

  “Are you sure all this is necessary? It seems a little extreme. “

  “She’s filing for divorce tomorrow. After that we’ll have more freedom.”

  “Good,” I say. I take a deep breath. “Okay, since this is the last day for all this and I decided to go out with a bang. You can never say I didn’t do anything for you.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “I bought something I think you’ll like and maybe will help the cause,” I tell him. “Well, it’s a little bit for you and a little bit for Henry. I saw it in the store and just had to buy it.” I lift my sundress over my head revealing the new swimsuit I bought. Tate’s eyes pop wide open and he burst into laughter.

  I look down at the revealing suit, black material with gold strings and adjust the straps. A gold marijuana leaf had been applied to the fabric covering my breasts and one over my pelvis. My skin has turned a warm brown over the last couple of weeks, which sets off the suit nicely. I figured Tate would love the fact I’m posing as his date in a skimpy bikini, while Henry would dig the design. Well, he’ll dig the skimpiness too, but for this party he’ll have to look and not touch.

  “Damn,” Tate says, his eyes glued to my chest. That is until he’s sent sprawling to the side. “Fuck!”

  Henry appears in the space where Tate had been standing. His eyes skim over every inch of exposed skin. He licks his lips and his fists tense near his sides. I can’t tell if it’s to keep from punching Tate or to keep his hands off of me. “Damn. Yeah, this isn’t going to work.”